


Addictions

by Zeds_Dead_Reader (Zeds_Dead)



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Arguing, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, BDSM, Collars, Dark Past, Death, Dementia, Depression, Eventual Relationships, Eventual Smut, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/F, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Grief/Mourning, Hacking, Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Kink, Love, Protectiveness, Reader-Insert, Restraints, Suicide Attempt, Triggers, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-09
Updated: 2016-10-22
Packaged: 2018-06-01 06:37:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 26
Words: 128,984
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6504730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zeds_Dead/pseuds/Zeds_Dead_Reader
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The job you did was demanding, but you were damn good at it. Always three steps ahead, you were the go-to person in the office. But you didn't let it get to your head and you remained a quiet yet friendly member of the team. After working hours, you often retreated to your second home, leading something of a double life.</p><p>Your helpful and open demeanour to colleagues and friends hid your darker thoughts inside and you dealt with the daily struggle of trying to keep it all together and be the best you could be.</p><p>It didn't help that one of the directors of your department was a distraction and you often found your mind drifting to thoughts of him, his dark ebony hair and pale features. Not that he ever looked twice at you. But then, out of nowhere, he did.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Double Life

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! The last fic I'm moving over to this new account, left it until the end as it's the one closest to my heart, a labour of love :)
> 
> Editing is taking place to tidy it up, originally posted in September and my style has changed somewhat since. 
> 
> I am rather attached to this one, so I'm happy to share it again. As always, feedback and comments are gratefully received, don't be shy ;)

You sat at your desk, four linked computer monitors in front of you. Frowning at the information, you made notes and suggestions on the pad of paper that was on top of the large, dark wood work station. This was a finance company and, working in the background, you oversaw accounts and the trades that happened daily. Also, you had an unrivalled knowledge of everything that happened in here, an extremely fast worker, both meaning that you were often called to assist with last minute deadlines and cleaning away major fuck ups. Your office wear was sensible but stylish and today you wore a royal blue silk shirt tucked into a tight black pencil skirt. Delicate but colourful bracelets sat on each wrist, (h/c) hair silky and shiny - the outfit was worlds away from what you wore in your free time.

Sensing an incoming presence, you looked up over the top of your black rimmed glasses. "Is it a good time, (F/N)?" You didn't have an office of your own, desk sitting in a quiet part of the large, busy floor. It was by a huge window that gave you views across the city and despite not being on the way to anything else in the building, you had a lot of passing visitors. Smiling up at the brunette, you motioned to the empty chair next to you. It was always there for moments such as this. People sought you out for help and advice, both work related and private.

The head of department thanked you and flopped down on the seat. She was your superior but held a great respect for you - for your work abilities but also as a good friend. You glanced to your screens. They could wait. An intern had sent you a report that was so full of errors it was unbelievable, yet you didn't mind, he was new, everyone had to start somewhere, everyone deserved a chance. Your friends and colleagues joked about the fact that you were too soft sometimes, however it was who you were and you knew they wouldn't have you any other way.

Placing your glasses on the desk, you turned to your friend. "Hange, how was last night?" you asked excitedly. She had been on a hot date with a guy from upstairs, Mike. He was a bit odd sometimes but quite good looking. Your friend simply shook her head and then the confession began.

"It was a fucking nightmare (F/N), from start to finish. First of all, one of the heels on my shoes broke, then I burped during the main course and then….then….argh, it's too awful to even say." You reached over and placed your hand over hers. 

"Aw come on, I'm sure it's not that bad?" you soothed. She looked down and told you in hushed tones. 

"He leaned over at one point during dinner and I thought he was going to kiss me, so I….I kissed him first. Turns out he was only reaching for the salt." Your eyes widened. 

"Oh Hange, what did he do?" 

"He pulled away as fast as he could and then didn't speak again. We got the bill, paid and he went home." She covered her face with her hands and shook her head again. "I'm so embarrassed." It came out in muffled words through her fingers. A look of shock was on your face, though. 

"So, he didn't even offer to walk you home? Call you a cab? That mother fuc…." Before you could continue, footsteps interrupted the therapy session. 

"Stop fucking gossiping and do some work." A figure clad in black swept past you both, speaking sternly without even slowing or looking round. You turned and watched as he walked down the hallway, eyes taking in his determined strut, suit covering the strong physique that you knew lay below - you'd gotten a nice view of his sculpted form at the on-site gym once.

A voice dragged your thoughts out of the gutter. "Don't waste your time (F/N), he's a moody prick, you're worth way more than that short ass." Your head snapped round to see her smirking knowingly. 

"I know, I know," you sighed. "But there's something about him. Besides the amazing body." She slapped your hand. 

"I said stop it (F/N), I can feel your sexual frustration from here." You sighed again. 

"It's only a fantasy Hange, it's harmless fun. There's not a chance in hell that we would ever get together." She seemed deep in thought and spoke her confusion out loud. 

"But why was he here? There's no need to come past unless he wanted?" You shrugged her thought away. 

"You know he has a way of materialising when people aren't working as hard as he thinks they should be." Your friend stood and waved a finger at you, warning you to stop thinking about the director of the department. Pulling yourself together, you got up from your seat. "Hange are you going to speak to Mike?" You smoothly turned the conversation back and with a shake of the head, she widened her eyes. 

"No way, I'm never going up to the trading floor again!" You smiled and pulled her in for a hug.

"Hey ladies, can I join in?" A smarmy tone snaked it's way to your ears and you didn't even move. 

"Oluo, fuck off." You could feel him stiffen at your words but you couldn't give a shit. Normally you got on with everyone, but this guy gave you the creeps. He thought he was god's gift to women and that was an instant turn off. The intruder grumbled something about lesbians and walked off, pride wounded.

~~~~~~

The working day was coming to an end and you gathered your stuff, shoving it in an over-sized bag. Shutting down your computer, you waved at those that were still here, calling good night across the vast floor. Voices returned your parting words alomg with a few waves as you made your way to the lifts. An annoyingly well spoken, pre-recorded voice told you it was the ground floor and that the doors were opening and you stepped out. Running your security pass over the electric gates, you smiled at the guard on the front desk and exited the building into the dark October evening. You pulled your coat tight as a chill hit your body and walked to the bus stop to wait for your unceremonious ride home.

After what seemed like a lifetime, you finally made it to your apartment. Throwing your bag on the couch, you rushed to the master bedroom to change; the first thing you ever did when getting home was get out of your work clothes. Pyjamas on, you went to the kitchen and poured a large glass of wine, slumping back into your couch and turned the TV on, channel still set at the brash music one you had been watching before leaving this morning. Searching through your things, you found cigarettes and a lighter, breathing in the smoke heavily; it had been a long day.

Your apartment was nice but not flashy - you made good money but lived well within your means. It had two bedrooms, essential for when any friends were round. Barely aware of the sound from the television, you sat, thinking. Unconsciously, you rubbed your wrist as you thought about how to help Hange out with her situation. You were sure Mike liked her, but her adorable clumsiness was an acquired taste. Might be a case of speaking with him, you thought. Also, you would need to talk to the intern, Armin. Such a sweet boy, yet he obviously wasn't cut out for the work environment he was in now but could do it eventually. He was smart but lacked the confidence needed to pull this job off so you'd take him under your wing, like you had done with many others in the past.

Realising you were dwelling too deeply about work, you turned your mind to wine, giving no shits that it was Thursday; you felt like getting a bit drunk. It helped you sleep, like it did on all days of the week, actually and you took a big drink of the red liquid. Finding your phone in the depths of your bag, you unlocked it. Five new messages. All from Annie.

"He's fucked up again (F/N)"

"Seriously this guy is shocking"

"Wtf he just asked a customer out for a date"

"I can't work with him"

"I quit"

You rolled your eyes. She was always telling you she quit so you didn't believe her threat. Tapping your response, you smiled. "I'll be in tomorrow, try not to kill him." Despite the angst that you would encounter, you actually couldn't wait to see them.

After the bottle of wine was all gone, you dragged yourself to bed and were able to fall into slumber quickly.

~~~~~~

It felt like you hadn't had water for weeks and your eyes refused to open. Rubbing a tired face, you managed to raise your eyelids a fraction, only to see it was pitch black still. Hardly surprising for this time of year, you thought as you turned to the glowing clock at your bedside. Fuck. Only 4.47am. You went to work early, admittedly, but not this early. Sighing, you forced yourself out of bed as any hope of more sleep had gone. Opening your bathroom cabinet, you selected a couple of pain killers and turned on the tap, bending to the stream of water as you gulped it down with the tablets. Classy. You groaned as you caught sight of yourself in the cabinet mirror, appearance matching the un-ladylike drink you just had.

As the shower beat down, you tried to think how it had gotten as bad this. You couldn't remember exactly when it happened, but all you knew was that now you couldn't sleep without alcohol, the slight tremors in your hands a testament to the shitty habit you'd developed. Thing was, once you were up and washed, you always felt fine. No one at work would be able to tell that you'd gotten drunk last night, even more so than normal as you'd hardly eaten a thing all of yesterday.

You pulled on a black dress to match your current mood, dark and lifeless. It was a nice garment though, cut in a fifties style that complimented your figure perfectly. Drying your hair, you thought about shoes and bracelets, mentally accessorising your outfit as warm air blew loudly in the room. The make up you applied was simple yet effective, jet black eyeliner and some tinted moisturiser to make your face look less tired than you felt.

Breakfast was steaming hot coffee and a croissant you found in the cupboard, which may have gone past it's use-by date. You told yourself off for not having gone shopping yet again and set a reminder in your phone to go tomorrow. Pulling your bracelets on, you looked in the mirror; any outward sign of your hangover now gone and the person staring back looked fresh and well rested. You slipped on your favourite heels, black with red polka dot details that gave a bit of colour to what would otherwise have been a rather drab ensemble. 

It was nearly half past 6, you might as well just go now. Work wasn't far, but once the traffic built up, the bus took forever to get through the busy city streets. Grabbing your bag and a light coat, you made your way out into the dark morning, still feeling a bit dizzy.

~~~~~~

It was nearly 10am and you walked down the corridor with a spring in your step. You'd achieved a lot today already, even at this early hour. An important email had been sent that contained vital information for a meeting. Armin had been talked through the changes he would need to make on his report and he had apologised constantly for his errors and the extra work he had made for you. With a smile and the usual friendly demeanour, you'd reassured him that it was no trouble at all and that was what you were there for.

Papers were gathered in your right arm as you hurried down to deliver them but you were stopped mid stride as a hand shot out from nowhere and gripped onto your left wrist tightly, pulling you towards the owner. The movement made you lose balance and you crashed into the person, getting a face full of clothing and a slight scent of washing powder. You opened your mouth to berate whoever had almost knocked you over, however ceased as you looked up into steely grey eyes, words caught in your throat. Pressed up against you was the man you always liked to watch, even daydreamed about sometimes. He was close, so close that it caused a blush to appear on you cheeks.

Staring down at you with pure fury, he snapped at you with a bitter tone. "Why the fuck didn't you send me that email, you shit?" You blinked, confused. 

"I-I did send it, Levi, it's..." He cut you off. 

"That's Mr Ackerman, or Sir, to you." He waved the electronic tablet at you, screen open on his email account. You saw that the last item in his inbox had been received at 7.48am - yours had been sent at 7.52, remembering it as you had to have the job done by 8am. "So if you sent it, then where the fuck is it?" He was shouting now, voice raising with every word, anger seeping from his body. You didn't dare point out the times on the messages he still waved in your face, but he was starting to piss you off. 

"I sent it at ten to 8. End of story. Now can you get off, you're hurting me." He looked down at where he still gripped tightly to your wrist and you saw his eyes widen ever so slightly as he stared. Oh shit. Quickly, you pulled your arm from him and pushed your delicate silver bracelets back down as you spun on your heel and stalked off back in the direction you had been going in before you were accosted.

Hange appeared from an adjoining corridor and approached her boss, eyes dark. "What did you speak to (F/N) like that for? Surely she didn't deserve it?" He looked up, orbs still slightly larger than usual from what he'd just seen. In a second, his gaze returned to it's usual half-lidded boredom. 

"She was supposed to send me that email, but the stupid little shit didn't" he spat, showing his subordinate the evidence. 

"Give me that," she snapped, snatching the tablet from his hand. Sighing, she pointed it back to him. "You haven't refreshed it, dumbass. Look." She trailed her finger down from the top of the screen and unread messages began to pile up. At the bottom, there was the email from you, received at 7.52am. Just as you had said. Hange practically threw the device back at him, shaking her head. "How did you get this far up the food chain without being able to refresh your emails?" Turning to leave, she left him with one last thought. "You should apologise to her, that was awful the way you spoke."

Levi stood in the corridor for a moment. In his haste to make it to the meeting, he had totally forgotten to give technology the prompt that it needed. He felt a tug of remorse for snapping at you like he did and made a mental note to say something the next time he saw you. The two of you had barely spoken to each other before, the need had never arisen other than to tell you to stop chatting and get on with your work. He did often find himself walking down past your desk though, if only to take in the view. And the view you left him with as you stormed off just now was etched in his mind, hips swaying angrily beneath a tight black dress. He smirked at the thought as he walked off to his next meeting.

~~~~~~

Your foul mood had not improved and the end of the day could not have come fast enough. That man had really pissed you off - hot or not, he had a terrible personality. You'd managed to keep to yourself as much as possible throughout to avoid having to plaster your happy face on more so than usual and as you packed up, your friend approached. "Hey (F/N), you ok?" You grunted in response. She came closer and placed her hand on your arm. "I heard what shorty said to you earlier. That man has a lot of attitude for someone so small." Nodding vehemently, you responded darkly. 

"He's really fucked me off today, Hange. All because he doesn't know how to use his bloody tablet." She patted you in sympathy and helped you gather up the paperwork that had to be placed in the confidential waste before you left. Looking at you with a mischievous grin, she asked a quiet question. 

"So is that you over him then, (F/N)?" Without looking up from what you were doing, you shrugged. 

"Don't get me wrong, I'd still like to do terrible things to that body, but maybe we could just transplant his personality?" Hange snorted in laughter, your lips turning up into a smile for the first time today since you'd been shouted at.

~~~~~~

Rushing around your apartment, you gathered the things needed for this evening, already showered and changed, your clothing much more casual than the dress you wore earlier. Tight black jeans were topped by a long-line figure hugging t-shirt with a low, rounded neck. The delicate jewellery had been swapped for chunkier accessories, leather and metal instead of silver. A pair of dark blue converse finished off your outfit and grabbing a coat, you stuffed your cigarettes, keys and phone in a small bag and left.

As you walked down the streets, you saw the Friday night hustle and bustle had begun. People lined the pavements outside bars and restaurants, huddling together to keep warm while they smoked and chatted. Raucous laughter sounded from one particular group of business men, all looking slightly dishevelled as their evening became more and more fuelled by alcohol. The cold air bit at your skin and the cloudy sky threatened rain, but it was refreshing and helped to blow away all of the anger you had built up throughout the day. Rounding a corner, you saw the familiar blue lights of the bar and smiled as you pushed the heavy doors open.

This was your bar. Your father had signed it over to you, along with everything else he owned before his dementia could kick in. You made regular visits to him in the care home he resided in now, but often wondered why you bothered - he had absolutely no idea who you were and it hurt you deeply to see him staring at you blankly, frowning at the strange woman that sat in front of him every week. He was the only family you had left though, so you continued to visit and put yourself through hell. 

Your mother had died when you were young and you remembered little of her. There were no uncles or aunts that you knew of and you had no surviving grandparents that you were related to. The only other person was your step-grandad and you did not consider him family in any shape or form. He was a filthy, lecherous excuse of a man and you'd put as much distance between the two of you as you could. He had liked you, up until a certain point. As soon as you were too old for him, he dropped you and was un contact less and less. That suited you fine, as you had been unable to get away from him before, although you knew you should. You never told another adult at the time about what he was doing to you, his little games of 'hide and seek' as he called it.

Realising you had been standing there for ages, lost in your thoughts, you snapped out of it and began to look around. Your eyes were met by soft lighting and ears assaulted by loud music; the jukebox installed only contained albums picked by you, as you refused to have shit tunes in your bar. A good sized crowd were enjoying themselves inside and casting your gaze around, you recognised a few faces, two of the regulars in their usual spot in the corner. Walking towards the serving area at the back of the building, you smiled and waved at those you knew and made your way to the friends that were working today. 

Annie stood glaring out at the customers, a look of frustration on her face. You quickly saw the reason for her appearance and the reason for her texts to you last night. The younger bartender, Eren, was in full flow, flirting with anyone and everyone and getting drink spilt all over the clean wooden surface. He saw you coming and straightened, trying to look busy and you threw your bag down before greeting your comrades.

"Eren, concentrate!" You spoke playfully as he poured yet more whiskey down the outside of the glass instead of in and he blushed, quickly mopping it up. 

"Sorry (F/N), I'll be more careful." Smiling, you patted him on the shoulder as you walked past and over to Annie, woman gritting her teeth as she turned to you.  
"I swear to god (F/N), I'm going to kill him." Elbowing her in the ribs, you reminded her of how she used to be when she was just starting out herself and asked her kindly to be patient. "I was never that bad," she said, defending herself. Grinning, you said one word. 

"Absynthe." She looked shocked that you even remembered that. 

"It wasn't my fault, the bottle was slippy!" Shaking your head, you smiled as you recalled how the strong green liquid had gone all over the floor and the smell was horrendous; you'd not been able to drink it since the incident. Annie was now the manager here and you knew you could rely on her to keep the place ticking over. As much as you enjoyed coming in, you didn't need to.

Noticing the regulars in the corner again, you went over to greet them. They had an odd relationship, but it was full of love. It seemed more of a father/daughter set up, or older brother. Sitting opposite them, you grinned warmly as you said hello and their faces lit up, smiling back at you. "Hey (F/N), how's it going?" The younger girl shouted, already quite drunk. 

"Good thanks, Isabel. Enjoying your evening?" She giggled with the look of someone who was nicely inebriated. 

"Yea, it's all good. Big bro said he might come down later on, he's never been here before." You looked over at the man, Farlan. 

"How come you've never dragged him in? How dare you?!" It was said with mock horror, however you had no idea who they were talking about, but an extra person through the door was always a good thing. The tall man grinned back at you, slightly less drunk than the female but definitely on his way. 

"He doesn't get out much." The bar had become busier and you stood to go back to help out serving. 

"See you later guys, send that friend of yours my way and I'll give him a discount!"

Customers had appeared with orders, Annie and Eren swiftly complying with their requests. You felt a familiar tremble in your hands and gripped the counter tightly so no one would notice the shakes up and down your arms. Quickly, you filled a glass with whiskey and sipped on it. You weren't strict on drinking at work, anyone who was ever employed here was allowed to as long as they followed the rules - don't get anywhere near being drunk and don't touch the expensive stuff. It had never been a problem and you were a strong believer in giving people a bit of slack. If you let them relax a bit, they were less likely to take the piss.

Tremors subsiding, a song came over the speakers and you sang along as you tidied shelves and sorted glasses. You had a little dance, too. Not that you were any good, but what you lacked in skill you made up for with effort. Spinning, you turned just in time to be met with the full force of the contents of Eren's cocktail shaker, leaving you with a t-shirt covered in Pina Colada. The brunette's bright eyes widened and a shocked look sprung up on his face. "I am soooo sorry (F/N)" he pleaded, his own body dripping in alcohol. Grabbing some cloths, you threw one to him and hit him square in the nose. Laughing, you waved off his continuing apologies and started to try and clean yourself down. Aware of another customer at the end of the bar, you made your way over, still scrubbing at the sweet smelling stain on your top.

"What can I get for you?" No reply came, so you glanced up, only to be met by a stony facade with flashing grey eyes. "Oh. It's you." Your good mood was shattered into a thousand pieces instantly at the sight of his emotionless expression and you watched with venom as his lips pulled into a small smirk. 

"Yes, it's me."


	2. Too Close For Comfort

Levi looked you up and down, but you couldn't tell if it was with disgust or interest. "Do we not pay you enough or something, (L/N)?" His brow twitched as he stared again at the totally different appearance that stood in front of him, a far cry from the sultry dress you had worn earlier. Still, nice and tight though, he thought. You huffed and tossed the cloth onto the bar, leaning forwards to be sufficiently heard over the music. 

"I own this place, actually." That threw him and now it was your turn to show smugness. You knew he hadn't expecting that by the way his bored features became ever so slightly surprised. Gathering himself, he returned to his usual asshole exterior, yet the glint in his eyes betrayed his body language. 

"Well, I think I might have underestimated you, (L/N). You certainly are full of surprises." Oh god, his voice. It was a thick, silky drawl that made your skin turn to goosebumps and you fought with everything you had to keep your cool and not let him see what your mind was thinking.

"So, Mr Ackerman. What can I get you?" You tried to keep as neutral and disinterested as possible, heart beating ridiculously hard in you chest, so hard you were sure he would hear it. 

"I'll have a scotch, rocks." Turning to fill a glass, you muttered to yourself. 

"A please would be nice." You passed the drink over to him, male hand reaching out to take it, however before you could let go of the item, his finger had brushed against yours, almost ghost-like but you felt it nonetheless. As your eyes locked, you could almost taste how much fun he was having making you feel awkward, toying like a lion does it's prey and he sighed, taking out his wallet. 

"My friends tell me I get a discount for knowing them." He gestured towards Isabel and Farlan. Now it was your turn to cover mild shock, but you flawlessly responded. 

"So you're this "big bro" I always hear about then? Well, in that case, it's on the house."

You turned to get back to tidying behind the counter, eager to have him leave you in peace and stop making you feel both angry and turned on at the same time, however you were aware that his figure lingered behind. Not allowing him the satisfaction of any recognition, you continued with what you were doing, stacking glasses and bringing bottles to the front of the small fridges that sat under the surfaces. It had backfired royally, but you were blissfully unaware as his eyes took your appearance in, studying every curve and paying close attention when you bent to arrange the stock. He managed to turn and tear himself away from the view, joining his friends once more.

The night progressed as standard, good natured drunks mixed in with a few crying women and testosterone induced men. Despite the coldness outside, it was boiling in here and you felt your t-shirt clinging uncomfortably. Levi had been up to the bar a few more times but you'd made him pay for the other drinks, not wanting him to think this could be his new favourite place to come and get free hand outs.

People began to drag themselves home as 1am and closing time approached. Farlan had practically carried Isabel out but you noticed their pale companion was still there, closed expression taking it all in. You let Annie and Eren go at the point that only three customers remained, telling them you could deal with the rest, thanking the pair for their work that night as you spoke with fake cheer. "Ok gents, that's closing. I'm going to be shutting up shop so, thanks and see you again!" That usually got people moving as a lot of those that stayed the latest were regulars and you all had a good rapport, however the two men that remained, other than your grumpy ass boss, were in no mood to leave.

Staggering over, they slurred words of annoyance in your direction, telling you to stay open a bit longer. They looked like something out of a zombie film, the way their bodies shuffled across the floor and leaning slightly to one side. "Sorry guys, no can do. I don't have a late license. But the bar two doors down does." You raised your arms and tried to herd them to the exit when one of the dishevelled businessmen grabbed you. Out of the corner of one eye you saw Levi stand, but you had this under control - drunk people were so easy to deal with as they had no co-ordination whatsoever. You moved with ease, years of kick boxing, self defence and just pure annoyance coming into play as you deftly ejected him from the premises. He came to rest on the road outside, face down and his sweaty friend ran out after his fallen comrade as you stood watching them manage to get up and walk off, grumbling.

Glancing round, you motioned to the exit. "Closing time for you too, Mr Ackerman," you said sweetly. He came towards you, no hint of the alcohol having had any effect on him and he shut the door, leaving you both inside. "What the…" He cut you off. 

"Listen, (F/N)." Secretly, you loved the sound of your name coming from him, but kept stern. "I need to talk to you. Buy a lady a drink?" Pointing to the counter, he raised an eyebrow slightly and you thought about it, acutely aware of the trembling hands by your sides. Yes, you could do with a drink actually. Shrugging, you walked over and behind the serving area.

"Same again, Sir?" you asked, not concealing the sarcasm in your voice very well. 

"Tch." The sound shot through the quiet of the room. "Yes and stop calling me that, it's not fucking cute. Just call me Levi." Hmm, well we're making progress at least, you mused as two generous glasses of scotch were poured and delivered round to the other side, perching yourself up on the stool next to the dark haired man. Raising the tumbler, you made a ridiculous toast. 

"To first name terms." He just stared at you with menacing eyes, then looked at where you held your drink. His gaze came back to yours, but it contained that questioning look laced with shock that he had given this morning when he held your wrist tightly. 

"Looks like we have more in common that I would have thought, (F/N)." You stared in dread at the liquor and saw the whole thing was shaking slightly, betraying your addiction in such a simple manner.

Throwing the receptacle back, you downed the contents. Fuck it. You couldn't actually be bothered to create another lie so just poured another measure from the bottle that you'd left on the bar. "And what is it that we have in common, exactly?" You spoke with rawness and noticed his dark liquid had also gone. Topping him up, you nodded - the look on his face said it all. "I always say, at least I can get out of bed in the morning without having to drink. At least I can make it to evening." Smiling dryly, you sipped at the brown contents, enjoying the burning feeling in your throat and the steadiness in your hands until he spoke. 

"I saw you trying to stop it earlier. A pro can always tell." His words made you feel cold as you realised he'd been watching you before you'd even seen him. How much time had he spent in here before he came to order?

"So just how long had you been spying on me before you thought you'd come over?" There was no malice in your words, simply a genuine interest. 

"Long enough to realise you're not the boring drone I thought you might be." Drone. Always nice to be thought of as something banal like that, and you smiled sardonically. 

"Well I'm sorry I didn't give you a good impression with all the fucking hard work I do or anything." Again, your grumble was still nowhere near angry - you wanted to see how this was going to pan out and he waved his hand in annoyance, dismissing your words. 

"Fuck the work. Fair enough, you're good to look at I suppose but I would never have wasted my breath on you if I didn't find you at least mildly interesting." He was full of compliments today and you stood up, signalling this little, well, whatever, was over. "You haven't heard what I wanted to talk to you about." His voice sounded different, almost meeker so you softened your glare slightly and turned, waiting for the guy to get on with it. "(F/N), I apologise for the way I spoke earlier. And for seeing that." That? You saw him pointing at the bracelets on your wrist. Ok, this was getting far too personal now, especially with someone who had said more to you in the last three minutes than he had in three years. 

"Thank you for the apology, Levi. And now I really must be getting going, so…" He nodded and placed some money on the bar. 

"For the drinks. I said I'd buy you one." And he left. You locked the doors and turned to the empty space before you, trying to figure out what the hell had just happened.

~~~~~~

Saturday night was usually for going out and having fun, but you had no desire to get dressed up and go somewhere that cost to get in and where you had to queue for half an hour to get served. So you decided to go to your bar as usual. Fantastic idea, someone with a growing alcohol addiction having a bar. But, if you didn't get it there you would only buy it elsewhere and it was much better to drink in company than alone. Drinking alone could be fine and relaxing for some people, but not always you. It sometimes sent your brain into very dark thought processes, even if it did help you sleep.

You had gotten your ass in gear earlier and had been to get some food shopping, cupboards now brimming with things to eat. And, of course, your wine rack was full once more. Looking at the time, you saw it was already nearly 7pm, the day having been frittered away with a few household chores and a lot of sitting around. You decided to get ready and crushed out your cigarette in the ashtray. Whilst you didn't want to go full on glam, you still wanted to look nice seeing as you were going to be a patron today and not working. Pulling on some dark blue skinny jeans, you looked over the tops that the wardrobe had to offer and selected a nice red and black one; it had long sleeves and embroidery down the front beneath the scooped neck line, the length coming to below the waistband and it clung tightly but comfortably to your body. Hair and makeup had been done this morning so you just topped it up where needed to freshen your look and brushed through your locks.

Sliding some black patent pumps on, you pulled your sleeves up and looked down to your inside arms. Pinkish lines ran up the middle of each one from the heel of your hand, around four inches long. It had happened 6 years ago and your dad still didn't know what had sent you into the spiral of depression that began at a young age. To tell him about the horrific actions of your step-grandad would have torn him apart even more, so you just explained it away as general anxiety and the pressures of life on a nearly 20 year old. He'd found you that day, lying on the bathroom floor of the family home, barely conscious. Three weeks of therapy followed and some strong medication before you were deemed able to function as a human being again. You still hadn't ever told anyone the underlying reasons, as if reliving them out loud would cause it all to come crashing down around you like an avalanche of pain.

So you carried on, keeping it all inside and you slowly built up a resistance to the feelings that used to pick you apart. In a way, you were glad your dad's dementia kicked in when it did, so he didn't have to remember the sight of his only child surrounded in a pool of her own blood, or the pain that was so blatantly etched on your face during the following couple of years. Thoughts of ending it all were replaced with an apathy for life and you turned to drinking to keep the nightly monsters at bay. It hadn't affected your sharp mind though, as you put your skills with numbers and people to good use by joining the firm you now worked at. Where you had met Levi.

Thoughts wandered to last night, gratefully changing the subject. What the fuck had actually gone on? It was far too intimate a conversation for the two of you to have had, surely? In one day, the pale man had clocked your scars, your addiction and spoke to you about it. That just sounded weird, but at the same time you were kind of glad; it was nice to just be called on it straight off the bat instead of people noticing but saying nothing direct. Monday would be interesting if you bumped into him and at least he'd had the courtesy to apologise for being a dick that morning.

Sighing, you grabbed your bag and set off to your second home.

Propping up the bar, you sat with a large glass of red wine, enjoying the feeling it gave you. Annie and Eren were in again, the troopers that they were, as was Ymir. Both her and Annie were strange creatures, rarely smiling and somewhat stand-offish, but you had gotten close to them both over the last two years that you'd held ownership - they could actually be really sweet when they wanted to. Neither of them knew directly of any of your troubles, but some glances told you that they were aware something was wrong.

The place was busy and you sat watching the flow of people that came to get their drinks, chatting with your friends when you could. Ymir stood close, refilling your glass to a mumbled thanks. She didn't break her work or show any signs of a change in conversation, yet spoke as quietly as she could. "(F/N), a guy's been staring at you for about half an hour." You didn't turn, that would be a rookie mistake and your friend appreciated the tact. You hoped to god it wasn't that fucker of an ex of yours, Jean. He'd been by a few times recently and each occasion ended in you throwing his sorry ass out. He had tried to get violent with you in the relationship, something you were not about to even entertain; one punch to the eye during an argument over a broken cup and you'd seen red. Your friends knew, those at the bar as well as Hange and they wanted to plot revenge, but you refused. After all, he had come out worse in the end. Ymir had never met him though, so you asked for a description.

"Well, he's got dark hair and looks really moody. Eren's been serving him at his table since he got here, slipped him some cash to keep the drinks coming or something." That was all you needed to hear. Dark and moody. What the fuck was he doing back here and why did he have your staff running around after him? You nodded. 

"Thanks, Ymir." She nodded back and moved away to serve customers as you stayed in place for a bit before deciding to go outside for a smoke. Walking to the door, you kept your eyes forward to make it look like you didn't know Levi was sitting there and pushed the exit. Cold night air hit your lungs as you grabbed a cigarette from your small bag, breathing it in with relaxation. Shivering, you wished you'd brought your coat as you watched the steady movement of Saturday night revellers. A few came into the bar, some nodding or smiling at you which you returned warmly, shaking hands that were offered.

You made your way back in to the noisy, joyous atmosphere to return to your seat, however before you could reach it, a palm touched you briefly on the shoulder. Turning, you set eyes on a now familiar gaze, shiny dark hair and an unusually casual Levi. He had a simple black top that was tight enough to show you the outlines of his muscular form. Damn him and that body of his. The male motioned delicately to the table in the corner that Farlan and Isabel usually sat at. "Care to join me?" You weren't sure what to say at first, but curiosity took over. 

"Buy a lady a drink, then?" 

"Already have." How presumptuous. But you guessed he wouldn't have let it go to waste if the offer was declined. You glanced over to see Ymir watching closely and nodded slightly to let her know it was ok. Her standard stern expression remained as she turned to carry on her work.

Sitting down at the arc shaped leather booth, you got comfy as Levi handed you a glass. He raised his own and you noticed there was a bottle on the table. So it wasn't just one drink he intended on having with you? You lifted yours in a mirroring action as he spoke his toast. "To first name terms." Looking at him with interest, you recalled how he hadn't responded when you'd said the same thing last night, but clinked glasses with him all the same. Both taking a long drink, you placed yours back down and looked at him once again. 

"So Levi, you must like this place then?" Resting your hand under your chin, you stared at him with genuine wonder as he grunted once and shrugged. 

"It's ok. A bit dirty in places," he began, glaring at the table with disdain. "But I'm more interested in the owner." Your stomach did a cartwheel, an animal reaction that was annoying; you weren't a silly little girl.

Watching as he sipped his drink, you leant back into the soft seat with a small smirk. "Oh really? Why?" This was too good to let go, you were intrigued and he shuffled slightly to turn to you more, left leg across the right, arm draped lazily over the back of the padded booth. He took another mouthful but his gaze never left yours, such a simple gesture that sent your nerves into a frenzy once more. Setting his glass on the surface, he spoke. 

"(F/N), there is more to you than I initially thought there was. I made that clear yesterday, brat." You stiffened at his accusatory tone and moved on, arms crossed. Feeling bravado from the wine and annoyance at his words, you decided to call him out. 

"Look, Levi, I don't know what you want from me. I've worked with you for three years. Three. Years." You let that sink in. "And now, here you are. In my place, sending out who knows what kind of signals. Ok, you picked up on a couple of things about me and well done. But I don't know what kind of game you're playing. I don't take kindly to games."

You stopped, mindful that you'd gone into defence mode and watched him carefully as you drained your glass, the man's thoughts guarded by that ever-present bored stare. He picked up the bottle and gave you a small top up, a slight smile on his lips. "Oh, no game, (F/N). No game at all." He pushed the receptacle towards you as he leant forward. "You are ridiculously intriguing and I intend to get to know you better." Your scowl remained in place as you looked over his form, trying to figure out what the fuck he was up to. A few minutes passed as you both sat and drank in silence and with a sigh, you eventually stood up. 

"Do you smoke?" He nodded once and you both made your way outside. Offering him one first, you lit up and shivered again, taking in the scenery. Levi stood against the wall, slowly dragging on his cigarette as he remained quiet. Frustration kicked in as you realised he wasn't going to say anything and it gnawed away at you, impatience bubbling to the surface. You tried to stay cool and collected but you couldn't hold it in anymore and mashed your smoke against the stubber on the wall, perhaps a bit harder than intended, a shower of hot ash peppering your hand and sending a stinging sensation across your skin. Unflinching, you turned to the man next to you. "Well, that was a good chat. We must do it again soon." Your voice dripped with sarcasm and anger and he looked down at you with amusement. 

"Tch. Let's go back in, you're freezing." Fuck sakes.

As you walked into the warmth, (e/c) eyes noticed that the crowd had started to thin and the table you'd been sitting at had been cleared of glasses, however no one sat there after you left, so you made your way back over. Levi sat down but you kept going, making for the bar. Annie was free and you asked for another bottle and two glasses. As she twisted the cork, she glanced across. "Who's that guy, (F/N)? He looks like a right laugh a minute." You snorted at her deadpan expression and picked up the wine she'd opened for you. 

"You have no idea, Annie. I work with him, god knows why he's even here. I'm starting to get fed up with him to be honest." She shook her head. 

"What is it with you attracting all the wrong ones?" Shrugging, you thanked her for the drink and marched back to the table, determined to get to the bottom of this bizarre conversation.

Defensive body language back in place, you looked over to see the same grey stare watching you intently. "So, you wanted to get to know me better? What do you want to know, exactly?" That could have been a huge mistake, but you were losing any patience that you might have had earlier. And there was the smirk. It was like he was sizing up your question, wondering how far he could push you before making you snap and ask him to leave. 

"Why do you drink?" A simple enough question, with an all too complicated answer. Part of you felt like just telling the whole story, you didn't know why. In the end you decided on the easy option. 

"Can't sleep without it. Why do you?" Straight back at him. If he was going to get to ask questions, then you sure as hell were too. Without intending it to be visible, his expression changed ever so slightly, a cloud drifting across his eyes. 

"Stress." It was as big a half truth as yours had been, but understandable. You hardly expected him to start spilling his guts.

He'd asked a few more questions of you, like how you came to be the owner of a bar. Explaining your father's condition, he listened intently to your words, seemingly interested even if he still looked perpetually bored. You spent more time in silence than actually conversing, but you learnt that he had been with the firm you both worked at for ten years now, however he was quite guarded about anything prior to that. Your curiosity had gotten the better of you and the next query asked how he knew Farlan and Isabel.

"Farlan's an old friend. We kind of picked Isabel up along the way and she just stuck around." So many thoughts ran through your mind about the strange friendship between them as you wouldn't have put the those three together as a close knit team, but they did seem to be quite the gang - you'd seen them talking together last night, much more animated than with his current companion. Deciding to leave it for now, you checked the time. It was nearly 1am. Levi saw the action and placed his hands on the table. "Walk you home?" He had one up on Mike, at least. But this wasn't a date. You still weren't sure what to call this, to be honest. 

"Thanks Levi. Let me go say bye first." Taking your empties, you walked up to the counter to bid farewell and both girls swooped on you instantly. 

"You're not going home with him are you (F/N)?" growled Ymir, obviously unimpressed by the short, angry man. Grinning, you tilted your head and shot them a tired look. 

"I wouldn't have the energy, even if I was going to go with him," you sighed. "He's just walking me to mine." Annie seemed to be unconvinced and demanded that you text her the minute you were indoors. 

"I'll know if you're lying, (F/N)" she warned. Snorting with a small laugh, you waved goodbye and walked out the door with your escort for this evening.

The short trip to your building was spent in silence, cigarettes burning. The smoke from lungs mixed with clouds of breath in the cold city and you felt your nose start to go red with the wintry weather. Levi watched you closely from the corner of his eye as he saw the pink glow on your cheeks, a result of the drop in temperature. He thought how it made you look so innocent, which you obviously weren't. The guy wasn't sure what it was about you that held his interest in a tight grip, but he found himself wanting to get inside your head, amongst other things. Pushing his thoughts away, he saw you had reached the destination.

"Well Levi, thanks for walking me back." You didn't really know what to say next and considered your next words carefully. "It's been interesting." He nodded and did something so simple but wholly unexpected, reaching out a hand from where it had hung by his side and lightly brushed yours with one finger. 

"No, it's been a pleasure, (F/N). Until next time." And with that, he was gone. You stood in place for a moment, mind whirring over his actions and wondering how such a small touch could send so much electricity through your body.


	3. Getting To Know You

Fuck Sundays. You hated them. Standing under the hot water of the shower, you tried to forget what it was you had to do today. Soap washed away your aches and soothed a spinning head, reminder of the fact that you hadn't stopped drinking this morning when you'd returned home. Nerves frayed after your strange night, it was seemingly a great idea to open another bottle and you ended up crawling into bed around 3am. Luckily, you didn't need to be out of here until early afternoon, otherwise you would have been screwed.

After you'd dried down, you pulled on some jeans and a black jumper, remembering how cold it was getting outside. Not rushing, you brushed through your hair and left it to dry naturally, giving it a rest from the ravages of the dryer. You didn't bother with much makeup today, there was no point, just simple tinted moisturiser and some loose powder to hold it in place over the day. Making your way into the living room, you gathered up the empty bottle and glass and took them to your kitchen. Opening the fully stocked cupboards, you pulled out some uncut bread and sliced thick pieces onto a plate. Moving to the fridge, you rustled through the contents until you found what you were looking for. Bacon, fuck yea. This was definitely a bacon day. Griddle pan on the stove, you waited for optimum heat and threw the raw meat down, listening to the satisfying crackle, stomach growling.

Once the food had been eaten, you felt ten times better and turned to your phone. Annie had replied to you after your message to confirm that you'd made it home, alone and you just hadn't bothered to look at your phone since. Thankfully, she had only sent a smiley face and you didn't feel bad about not having read it earlier.

You sat and gathered your thoughts, brain wandering back to your unexpected evening. Still not really sure what to call it, you stopped trying and just accepted it for what it was; a bit odd, but intriguing. You wondered what it was going to be like at work tomorrow and lit a cigarette to calm your nerves, knowing that you would have to leave soon.

Tapping out a message, you felt yourself getting more and more anxious, stomach knotting in a familiar mess of butterflies and nausea. Trying to take your mind off it, you sent a text to Hange, asking how she was doing. Her reply was almost instant and you imagined her sitting glued to the phone, in the middle of about twenty conversations at once. "I'm brilliant (F/N), I'll tell you all about it tomorrow." She signed it off with a wink and you smiled, wondering what had happened to her over the weekend and sent her a message back. 

"You'd better tell me everything!" Sighing, you stood and shoved the phone in your pocket, along with keys and cigarettes. Time to go.

~~~~~~

Sitting in the high backed chair with hands placed on your lap awkwardly, (e/c) eyes looked over across at the man in front. Not knowing what to do or say, as usual, you just watched him. The frail body opposite you fidgeted in his own seat, face frowning in confusion. "Are you here to change me?" You gulped, a lump forming in your throat and tears welling. Shaking your head, you spoke gently to him. 

"No, dad, I'm not here to change you. I just wanted to see how you were." His frown deepened. 

"I don't have a daughter, who are you? Are you sure you're not supposed to be washing me or something? They don't like slackers in this place. You'd better get up and start working." Anguish racked through your body, the feeling you got every single fucking Sunday, but you refused to leave - there was still ten minutes left of your visit.

The time passed slowly and eventually you were brought out of your dad's small room by one of the carers. "You know he doesn't mean any harm, (F/N)," said the large man and you nodded, trying to keep it together. He must have seen the look on your face and decided to stop talking, instead settled for just patting you on the shoulder as you left, walking off back towards your home, thoroughly defeated. Pulling out your phone, you noticed that you had another message from Annie. Blinking quickly to clear your vision, you saw that there had been a mess up with a delivery and you were out of a couple of things. She was working alone today, so you reassured her that you would go pick some things up at the cash and carry and get them to her soon. At least it took your mind off the past hour and the cold, sick feeling that invaded your body.

~~~~~~

Bags lined your arms as you struggled to open the door to the bar - you didn't know how you managed to get this far, the weight of shopping was a bit more than you'd thought it would be. Crashing through the entrance, you looked up to see the blonde, a grateful look on her face. She hurried over to help you with the burden and you made your way out back to restock the shelves. There were only a couple of people in here, both sitting alone and sipping at their drinks with depressed looks on their faces - the Sunday ghost shift. Looking back to your friend, you saw her expression and instantly worried. "What is it, Annie?" She breathed in deeply before she spoke. 

"Jean was in here earlier looking for you again." Shit. What did that low life want now? 

"I hope you told him to..." She cut your words off and finished your sentence. 

"Fuck off and die? Yes I did. But he looked pissed, (F/N). More so than usual." You sighed and ran your hand through your hair with a slight shake. 

"Don't worry," you reassured her, "I'll handle it when I see him next."

You moved to leave and she touched your arm. "I'm sorry for bothering you on a Sunday," she said softly. "Are you ok?" She knew where you went each week, could see the pain all over your face and you tried to smile, but failed. 

"It's ok Annie, you're not bothering me at all. And I'm ok, thanks. I'll be ok." An easy lie had slipped out from your lips.

~~~~~~

Yet another morning rolled in and yet another banging headache. You'd hit it hard last night, a combination of seeing your dad and hearing about Jean sniffing around again. Already dressed and ready to go at a stupidly early hour, you pulled your coat on and left the apartment, bottles still strewn around the room. It could be cleaned up tonight, you thought as the lift took it's passenger down to the foyer. It wasn't one of those fancy buildings which had a concierge, only the elevators and letterboxes that lined the wall. Footsteps echoed across the marble floor as you made your way to the revolving doors, street outside still relatively quiet.

Time passed quickly and you were kept busy as usual. Reports were sent, saved to locations on the computer system and you had frequent visitors. Hange hadn't been round yet, but you could see from her electronic diary that she was absolutely stacked with meetings today. Immersed in your work, you felt someone approach and lean against the wall behind you. "Hey (F/N), how you doing today sweet cheeks?" Oh god, not him. 

"What do you want, Oluo?" you spat, not bothering to conceal your distaste. He clicked his tongue, trying as he always did to imitate the director. 

"That's no way to speak to me, (F/N). Especially seeing as you will be saying my name in a totally different way later, begging me for more." You felt a bit sick at his words and actually gagged a little. Eyes burning with disgust, you turned and looked up at him over the rim of your glasses, however before you could say anything, an icy voice came to your rescue.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" Oluo froze, wide eyed and turned to his superior. 

"S-sorry Sir, just asking (F/N) a question." He practically ran off, bumping into the walls of some of the desk cubicles in his haste to remove himself from that situation. You turned your gaze to Levi, the look that you had intended for the slimy man still etched on your face. 

"Well aren't you little Miss popular today," he growled, moving closer. Looking down, he took in your appearance - sensible high-necked but figure-hugging green dress, dark tights and girly heels, a polar difference to the woman he had spoken with over the weekend. The way you looked up over your glasses made Levi want to scream, but he kept his cold exterior in place, not betraying the thoughts that sprang up in his mind. The feeling of his gaze all over you sent a slight flush on your cheeks and you responded to his sarcastic comment. 

"Believe me, I would rather that shit didn't come anywhere near me but I can't help it if people pass by." You shot the thinly veiled reference at him, wondering why he was actually here.

Nothing happened for a few seconds but it felt like hours and finally, he decided to speak, his usual moody nature dripping from every word. "Where's that fucking presentation?" Back to normality. You'd expected nothing less, hadn't deluded yourself that the drinks you shared would make any difference today. Sighing, you turned to your work. 

"It's saved in the usual place. Been there since 8.45." You realised you'd snapped at him and regretted it instantly as his low voice cut into you like shards of glass. 

"Don't fucking talk to me like that again, (L/N)." Angry footsteps let you know he'd stormed off and you glanced up to watch him leave, unable to take your eyes away despite your annoyance at the fact he had reverted to last name terms again. What the hell?

Still gazing in the direction that he had disappeared in, hands grabbed your shoulders from behind and you squeaked in surprise. A few heads turned to look over at the sudden noise, smirks and laughs ringing throughout the office. "Fuck Hange, you scared the living shit out of me!" Whispering, you kept it low in case Levi wasn't too far away, waiting to pounce. She grinned, taking her place in the usual seat beside your desk and you could feel the excitement radiating from her, eyebrows raised for an explanation. 

"I went out with Mike again on Saturday!" Hands gripped into balls up at her face and you smiled warmly. 

"Oh my god Hange, what happened?" She told you all about what occurred on Friday after you'd left the office; it turned out that he was embarrassed by her kiss the other night and didn't know what to do. The man wasn't repulsed by it, as she had feared, he was merely a bit shy and had tracked the woman down to ask her out for dinner again. 

"And it went well (F/N), really really well." The emphasis on her words was a clear indication of the fact that it wasn't just a meal that they shared.

You gasped and laughed, grabbing her hand. "No fucking way, Hange! That's fantastic! How was it?" She knew you had a dirty mind, she did too and set about whispering some scant facts about her night. 

"Let's just say that he knows how to treat a lady," she winked. "And my god, is he big." In fits of giggles, you covered your face as your body shook with childish glee, cheeks turning red. She was in the same state as you both gasped for air between laughs, trying to keep quiet as much as possible. Unfortunately, it wasn't enough. 

"Are you fucking kidding me? Do you ever do any work, you shit?" There he was again. You swore he just hid round corners waiting to tell you off. As the man stalked past, you both wore expressions of scolded children but your smirks still remained. Sure that he'd gone, she turned to you.

"So how was your weekend?" You laughed softly and shook your head. How did you even start? 

"It was, shall we say, interesting." She leant forward, hanging on your every word. 

"Who did you do, (F/N)?" Shock crept over your face for a second and then you realised who you were talking to, the woman with the filthiest thoughts you had ever met. 

"No Hange, nothing like that. Still in the midst of my dry spell I'm afraid." Your friend looked upset at the lack of gossip. "I spent most of it in the bar, if you must know. Bumped into a few people too." You didn't think it was wise to divulge who your drinking buddy had been just yet, that could spell a world of pain. She looked at you with a sudden concern and her gaze turned down to your hands that were clasped tightly together.

"(F/N), I'm worried. I don't want you to drown yourself in alcohol again, please be careful." You smiled wanly, eyes clouding over at your friend's words. 

"I know Hange, I know. It's just been a rough few days?" Nodding, she sighed and stood to leave, her next meeting approaching quickly. 

"You know where I am if you need me, (F/N)." Hange bent down and gave you a peck on the cheek, your heart filling with the love you had for your friend.

The rest of the day flew by and you had no more contact with Levi. Or Hange actually, she was ridiculously busy. Armin had stopped by for advice on the project he was working on and you had gladly given him your undivided attention; he was doing better than last week and seemed to have a handle on it all now. Reaching your apartment, you fumbled for keys and let yourself in, eyes taking in the mess that was left behind from the night before. You changed into your pyjamas and cleared the place up, bottles clinking into the recycle tub. Picking an easy dinner, you shoved a frozen pizza into the oven and sat down to relax.

~~~~~~

The week went by in a blur and it was Friday again before you realised. Hange had plans with Mike tonight and you told her to stop by the bar if she was passing. You weren't working tonight, the three staff more than capable of handling it, but you were going to have a drink and catch up with them all seeing as you hadn't been in since Sunday, only keeping in contact by text. As you got yourself ready to go out, you thought about how after that Monday, Levi hadn't been past or spoken to you at all. That was normal and you didn't think much of it but still felt a pang of disappointment. Shaking your head at the stupidity of it all, you pulled on your standard skinny jeans and converse, search beginning for a top to wear. Picking a simple yet effective striped one, you smoothed yourself down in front of the mirror, long sleeves meaning you didn't have to bother with jewellery. Grabbing your coat and bag, you made your way out into the evening air.

The sky was clear tonight, making it even colder than recent days an you looked up at the stars, eyes searching out the constellations that you knew, enjoying their faint twinkles. Rounding the corner, you were aware of a gaze and you looked over towards the building. Fuck. Jean stood against the wall, glaring with malice. Taking a deep breath, you flicked your now finished cigarette to the ground and mentally prepared yourself for what was about to happen. You intended to walk past and straight in, however his arm stopped you, gripping uncomfortably onto your hand. "No (F/N), you're not getting away from me again." His voice was thick with rage and you smelt beer on his breath. Great. Pissed off as well as drunk. He never could handle his alcohol, it turned him into a bitter, twisted man. Ripping your arm away, you stared at him with a serious scowl. 

"What the fuck do you want, Jean? Haven't I made myself clear already?" He swayed slightly and shook his head. 

"You know you can't live without me, (F/N). You're only lying to yourself," was his slurred reply. "Just come back home with me and I'll show you what you're missing."

You snapped and sent a harsh slap across his already red face. "Oh, you're going to regret that," he growled and moved to hit you. Dodging the advance, you spun out of his way and he crashed into the wall with surprise. "I'd forgotten how slippery you were, (F/N)." Seething with anger, he tried again but before he could bring his arm round, he was gripped from behind. 

"I would think very carefully about your next move, you shit." A quiet, threatening voice cut through the air and you saw a flash of silver in the eyes of the man who now held your ex boyfriend at bay. Jean flinched and looked down at whoever had stopped him, laughing. 

"You reckon? What the fuck you gonna do about it, short ass?" In a split second, he was flat out on the cold pavement, back pressed against concrete. Levi leant over him, looking down with total disgust. 

"That." He kicked Jean in the ribs, earning a loud groan from the man on the floor and stepped over him towards you. "You ok, (F/N)?" Genuine concern rang in his voice and your confusion over whatever this weird relationship was came back in waves. 

"Yes, thanks Levi. He's a fucking useless prick." You threw your own strong kick into Jean's back, grimacing with pleasure as you heard him shout in pain once more. Leaving him lying outside, you and the pale man entered the bar, male companion moving to sit down at the empty booth you'd occupied last week and you hurried to greet your friends.

"Hey guys, what's new?" The sing song voice came out sounding a bit too happy and Ymir's face darkened as she came over. 

"What's wrong?" No point even attempting to lie to this one. 

"Jean tried to hit me outside." Her eyes widened and Annie also rushed over to hear what you had to say. "But he punched him before the dick could even blink, it was so fucking funny." Smirking evilly, you watched the two women's eyes flick over to where you'd gestured to Levi and then back at you, both leaning forward over the wooden surface. 

"Really, (F/N)?" asked Annie. "He's much smaller than Jean?" You lifted an eyebrow. 

"So am I, but it didn't stop me from doing him some damage." She grunted at the truth in your words, recalling the aftermath of when you'd taken care of him on the night he decided to turn physical. 

"Ok, but who is he? I know you work with him..." Annie nodded over to the corner table and you shrugged. 

"I'm still trying to figure that out myself," you muttered with honesty. 

"Fair enough, but watch out. You don't need another fucking weirdo in your life." Nodding, you looked at both of them with a smile and walked round the bar to pick up a bottle and two glasses. So this was going to be you and Levi's thing, it seemed. Not sure what you thought of that yet, you joined him at the table and threw your coat across to an empty part of the soft seat, sitting next to him as he poured the drinks.

The man said nothing, prompting you to take the lead. "So, are we still on first name terms? Or is that just at the weekend?" Your annoyance combined with confusion wasn't well hidden and grey eyes stared over, looking like he was ready to kill. 

"Listen (F/N), don't piss me off." He sipped his drink before continuing. "Work is work, you know that. You're a different person there, as am I." He gestured around the bar with a delicate finger. "Here, we're ourselves." He had a point; you had your office persona and assumed that he did too. Sitting back, you relaxed slightly, feeling that this was going better than you had thought it might. 

"Ok, fair enough. I'll bite," you said with interest. "What would you like to talk about today?" If you had read the situation correctly, this would be how it went. Sit, drink, questions. Levi seemed satisfied that you were on the same page and let the tension out of himself. 

"Let's start with that fucker lying outside your bar." Taking a mouthful of deep red liquid, he looked over the glass at you again, an action that once more sent shivers through your body. At that moment, you decided to be wholly truthful to his questions, an unspoken trust between two, even if you weren't sure why - it just felt right. 

"He's my ex, Jean." The pale man nodded, he had figured as much. "And about six months ago, he decided to punch me in the face when I dropped his cup by mistake." Your companion stiffened ever so slightly, however his fatigued expression didn't change when he spoke. 

"Well, now I'm twice as glad I hit the fucker." You laughed lightly, a joyous sound that sent electricity through Levi's soul. 

"Why were you glad before?" He leant his arm back over the top of the booth and looked away as if totally disinterested with your query. 

"I didn't like his face." That finished you, instantly giggling again like you were with Hange at the beginning of the week. He watched with interest as you calmed yourself down, staring at you with a questioning look. 

"Sorry, Levi. That was just too fucking good. You can be quite hilarious, you know that?" A smirk tugged at his lips as he brought his glass up to finish the drink, internally glad that he had made you laugh so hard. Once you'd eventually stopped randomly chuckling, you took a deep breath. "How do you really know Farlan and Isabel?" It was your turn now. Considering the question along with how to answer, Levi too had a realisation that this was an open and honest conversation. Filling your glasses once more, he began to explain. 

"I met them in rehab." That didn't come as a surprise as such and although you wouldn't have outright guessed it, his confession made sense. "As you can obviously tell, all those months of fucking therapy and meetings really helped the three of us." Dripping with sarcasm, the low voice remained dark. "Isabel joined later than us and we took it upon ourselves to watch over her." He stared off at nothing in particular. "That was nearly thirteen years ago and we've stayed close ever since."

That reminded you; they were usually here on a Friday. "Where are they today?" Pulling himself from his thoughts, he looked at you. 

"I don't know, actually. Probably sleeping off a hangover or something." You nodded but weren't convinced by his explanation; he seemed troubled. Leaving that alone for the time being, you stood to go out for a smoke. "I'd better come in case that shit head's still out there." You laughed again at the previous conversation and quickly ran your empties to the bar first, sticking a thumb up to Annie to let her know it was going well and she smiled slightly whilst sorting a customer's order.

Jean had gone, thank fuck and the two of you enjoyed a cigarette in silence, watching crowds of people passing by, all going about their evening business in groups or alone. Nearly ready to go back in, Levi stopped you as he spoke. "Actually, I'm a bit concerned (F/N). I haven't heard from them in a couple of days." You knew there was something wrong and were glad he'd offered the information instead of having to drag it out of him. 

"Let me ask Annie if she's seen them?" you suggested. He snorted once in confirmation.

Back behind the bar, pulling out your next round, you asked your friend the question. "No I haven't, come to think of it. Something wrong?" 

"I'm not sure. Probably not. Let me know if you see them at all?" She promised to keep a look out and you returned to your companion, drinks in hand as you shook your head, letting him know they hadn't been in here and a look of worry crossed his pale face. "I'm sure it's nothing, Levi. Annie's going to let me know when they come in." Not if, when. You wanted to keep this positive.

Silence descended once more and you thought that was perhaps the end of today's question and answer session. Levi broke the quiet between you with a softer voice than usual, his eyes locking on to yours. "Why did you do it?" That was always going to be the obvious next step, you thought and made a bold decision. 

"This isn't the place for that conversation, Levi. I will answer you, but not here. Not in public." For some inexplicable reason, you were going to tell the whole story to someone for the first time and you sure as hell weren't going to do it in front of a bar full of people. He searched your face and found pain, an expression he didn't like to see descend on your features. Nodding, he gestured to the table. 

"Let's finish up here then, (F/N). No hurry." You appreciated his patience and understanding, smiling warmly at him. 

"Thank you, Levi." Raising his glass, he blinked slowly at you to let you know it was no trouble.

The bottle had been emptied and you'd spoken about inconsequential things, like the woman who kept falling over drunk at the other side of the room and the names of those who worked here. Also that filthy bastard, Oluo; Levi had found it amusing how much you seemed to hate the man as you usually had patience with everyone. Once your glasses were drained a final time, silver eyes looked up studiously, asking without words if you still wanted to answer his earlier question. 

"Ok. Ready to go?" Speaking quietly, you confirmed that you were indeed open to the conversation and grabbed your things, quickly rushing over to your friends. "We're going to take a walk. Let me know if you need anything though guys?" Ymir reached out and grabbed your hand. 

"Be safe, (F/N)." Always so serious. You smiled back and nodded, leaving them to join Levi by the door.

Stepping out into the open, you made a brave supposition. "Shall we go back to mine?" The man raised his eyebrow and you shot him a scowl. "No funny business. This is purely on the basis of our little getting to know you technique." You put a name on what this was and he seemed content with that. 

"Alright (F/N), but remember it was you that suggested funny business, not me. So hands off." Mischief laced his words and you looked over with a grin.


	4. A Problem Shared

Opening the door to your apartment, you were glad you'd tidied up earlier. A knot of adrenaline curled around your stomach as you got ready to let everything out that had built inside up over the years. Selecting a nice wine, you offered Levi a seat on the couch and brought two glasses over. As he attended to the cork, you slipped off your coat and shoes, taking his own jacket for him and hanging them together on the hook behind the door. The TV was on quietly in the background and with more than a little trepidation, you sat to the man's side and placed a pack of cigarettes down on the small coffee table, taking one out for you both. 

Leaning back, you turned to the guy sitting to your left, his arm thrown over the cushioned furniture and legs crossed in his usual stance. "Are you sure you want to hear this, Levi? It could get messy?" Nodding slowly, his face was softer than his usual stern appearance. 

"If you're ready," he said quietly. With a serious expression, you looked at him intently. 

"I think so. I've never told anyone this before. Ever. But for some reason I feel like I can tell you." Slight surprise flashed across his eyes, however he remained silent to let you begin.

And then it all came spilling out. Between gulps of wine and drags on cigarettes, you told him about your step-grandfather, about how he would lock the two of you away in a dusty, dank bedroom that he shared with your maternal grandmother; she was always out at the time, of course. The curtains were never open fully and the thick green fabric that covered the windows offered little light into the room. A large wardrobe stood in the corner, old fashioned paintings hung on the wall and a small double bed dominated the space, an old quilted throw hanging over the sheets beneath. 

It had started as a game - you hid and he came seeking. But then the touches started, the disgusting grins when he found you until one day when it escalated to something more. Lying on the horribly itchy covers, he stole your innocence, again and again, week after week, months. Years. You were too scared to tell anyone, to breathe a single word and shame played a part too - the older you grew, the more obvious it became that this kind of behaviour was not normal.

One day you had served your purpose for the last time and every scheduled instance that you were due to spend time at the small apartment, he would find an excuse to tell your father. How he was busy and couldn't watch you anymore, or he was away on holiday. You felt relief, but also that same suffocating despair and self loathing. Years passed by and the weight of your childhood was crushing, wholly asphyxiating and sent you into a deep depression that you could find no way out of. 

So one day, at the young age of nineteen, you decided to take action and leave it behind forever. Locking yourself in the bathroom, clammy hands took a razor blade from your pocket and without hesitation or ceremony, it was dragged deeply and slowly from your wrist up your left arm and then the right. Metal fell to the floor along with the sounds of your blood dripping in the quiet house and you felt light headed. Soon, you'd come crashing down too, lying prone on the cold tiles, covered in your own life essence. Your father had found you not long after, breaking the unusually locked door and calling an ambulance as you hung onto the last threads of consciousness.

Recovery was hard as you faced disapproving faces in the hospital from staff and felt a deep regret for your dad, but you still couldn't tell him what had happened. He was the one that sent you to spend time with your only family, thinking it was fun and joyful and you couldn't bring yourself to hurt him anymore. So you kept quiet, to everyone, until now.

You hadn't realised it, but tears stained your face and Levi's hand held yours tightly. Shaking, you took a long drink to calm yourself down and he followed suit, trembling palm swept over your face to wipe the droplets away but it was pointless, they were still falling silently. Suddenly you were being hugged tightly and you buried your face into a toned chest and began to sob loud and hard. You couldn't remember the last time you'd cried properly, let go and released the tenuous hold on sanity and currently it all seemed to be coming out in a wave of sorrow and pain. Your body shook and without thought, you wrapped your arms around the man who you were quickly considering a close friend, holding on for dear life as years of suppressed emotions were let loose.

Unsure of how much time had passed, you finally got control of your tears and sniffed loudly. Levi stroked your hair in a soothing motion and you sat back, raising your hands to clean the tears again. Before you could, two thumbs ran under your eyes and across your skin, drying the tiny rivers for you. "Thank you, Levi. Sorry...." Trailing off, you weren't sure what else to say in this unexpected situation and he grabbed your hands. 

"No (F/N), don't fucking apologise and it's me who should say thank you for letting me in." The pale face in your blurry vision was determined and he grit his teeth together in anger at all you'd been put through. Turning, he passed your glass and you smiled gratefully, expression lighting up slightly and he pulled you gently sideways into his body, strong arm holding you tight as he picked up his own drink. You sighed, enjoying his warmth but also the fact that you had finally confessed - a weight felt as if had been lifted.

"What a night, eh?" you said with a shaky laugh. He smirked lightly and squeezed you closer. 

"You could say that."

Levi left an hour or so later, making sure that you were ok before he went and you'd assured him that you were fine and thanked him again for listening. "Tch. Don't mention it, brat. Here." He passed you a small card from his wallet that had his personal number on it. "In case you need anything." Smiling down at the digits printed on the paper, you tapped it into your phone and sent him a blank message so he would have your details too. 

"Same. Any time, day or night." You held his hand lightly for a moment, sending him a grip that conveyed just how grateful you were to have him be there for you.

As he walked home, the man felt a mixture of sorrow and protection. He knew you were going to be different, but hadn't banked on just what impact you would have on his life already.

~~~~~~

Waking to early morning light, you turned to your blinking phone. Checking texts, you had one from Hange and one from Annie. The first wanted to meet up today and the second wanted to make sure you weren't tied up in a dungeon somewhere. Snorting laughter, you propped yourself up and rubbed your puffy eyes, a left over manifestation of the tears you had shed last night.

You messaged Hange, asking her if 4pm at the bar was ok. Again as usual, an instant reply popped up confirming your date. Turning to Annie's text, you told her that you were currently being slowly roasted on a spit over an open flame, but you were fine, don't worry. Putting your device down and smirking at the light hearted message that had been sent, you moved into the living room, gaze resting upon two glasses as you recalled your evening. Smiling warmly, you tidied up and thought how you felt a sense of security with Levi and hoped you hadn't scared him off.

After you'd showered, denims were pulled up and a large t-shirt thrown on without care. Sorting your hair and face, you were finally ready to start the day, which right now involved housework.

~~~~~~

Hange sat across from you, drink grasped in fidgeting hands as she excitedly told you about her night out with Mike. "Oh (F/N), it was so romantic, even if he did keep sniffing at people." You knew he was a bit odd and that sealed it. "We walked for ages, talking and laughing, it was just perfect." Smiling at your friend's joy, you watched as she became glassy eyed as she thought of her new boyfriend. 

"I'm so happy Hange, you deserve it." She beamed back at your words but leant in towards you, sticking her thumb behind her towards the counter.

"I hear from these two that you have a new man friend?" Wiggling her eyebrows, you hoped with every fibre that the women serving hadn't given a description. That would be disastrous, she would jump all over it and as much as you loved her, it could only end in what would be a nightmare at work. And, as you were still figuring out your companion, you didn't need any spanners in the works.

"What did they say exactly?" you growled, eyes dark and she shrugged. 

"Not much, only that you spent ages talking and then left. Together." She searched your expression for information and saw nothing behind your glare. 

"You won't find anything because there isn't anything to tell, Hange. My virginity is still intact." Your friend snorted a bit too loudly at that. 

"That's classic (F/N), you. A virgin." Laughing uproariously, she grabbed her sides. 

"Fucking feels like it right now," you grumbled. That made her giggle even more, choking on the beer that had just been swigged. She calmed sufficiently and then remembered something else. "Ooh, they said he punched Jean too!" You nodded. 

"That part is true." Grinning, you remembered his stupid face as he had hit the floor.

"Well (F/N), he sounds like a keeper."

~~~~~~

Stretching under the covers, you groaned at your aching body, recalling how the two of you had danced the night away, badly. Someone had actually asked you to stop at one point and you thought Hange was going to fight them. Regretting some of the dubious moves pulled yesterday as your leg screamed in pain, you walked delicately to the bathroom to brush your teeth and shower.

Slowly, the warm water eased muscles and you felt a bit more human. Already dreading your early afternoon visit, you dragged yourself through to get dressed before making the trip that Sundays always dictated.

Sitting in the uncomfortable chair an hour later, you watched the figure in front closely, taking in the frailty of your once strong, protective father. He was getting worse; his once sharp eyes were clouded with the fog of death and he looked nothing like the man you were raised by. Normally, he would be chiding you to change him or go get his lunch, thinking that you worked here but today, he said nothing, just stared out of the large window with a haunted look. If possible, he appeared even thinner than last week, his cheeks hollowed and dark. Shaking, you took a deep breath and rubbed your wrist absent mindedly.

The large carer approached from behind but you didn't move. Instead, you gazed intently at your shell of a dad and spoke to the man stood next to you. "It's going to be soon, isn't it?" Words came out in a whisper and a hand was placed gently on your shoulder. It made you think how it was always the giant men with palms the size of shovels that had the most soft touch and he squeezed lightly in confirmation of your fears. 

"I'm sorry, (F/N). I wish I could say something else, but..." He trailed off sadly. The pair of you had known each other for the past two years and other than the times he was on holiday, you saw him every week without fail.

Standing, you walked over and crouched down, placing your arms tightly around your dad, but not too harsh in case you hurt his delicate frame. He didn't even flinch, eyes remaining fixed on the scene outside. Screwing your eyes shut, you muttered to him. "I love you, dad. I know you don't remember me, or everything you did for me. But I'm sorry. I'm sorry for what I put you through." Kissing him lightly on the cheek, you stood once more and looked down upon him, icy pull clutching at your heart. "Bye dad. I'll see you next week."

~~~~~~

Sunday had turned into Monday and then the days simply plodded by. You went through the beginning of the week in a mist of sorrow and pain, paired with the usual cloud of a hangover and you hadn't been able to bring yourself to eat much, nibbling at a few things here and there but nothing that could be considered a meal. Hange had noticed your mood straight away at the start of the working week, such a difference to how you had behaved on your night out and she had promised to catch up with you, however meetings and client schmoozing had so far prevented her from doing so.

Levi had passed a few times, muttering grumpy comments about finishing reports or finalising documents, but you didn't have it in you to retort in the usual way. He'd also spotted how withdrawn you were and hoped it wasn't to do with the information shared on Friday night, noting how you hadn't even bothered to sneak a look at him like you normally did. Yet he didn't break the pattern and decided to wait until the end of the week to see you again outside of work.

It was Wednesday afternoon before Hange managed to sit down in the chair that was always ready next to your desk and she took in your appearance sadly. Your usual dress style was still present, however your face was ashen, eyes lined with dark bags that had been badly concealed with foundation - the woman was worried. Sighing, you put your glasses down and turned to her, hands grasped together tightly. "I know, Hange. You don't need to tell me, I'm well aware that I look fucking awful." She started to try and argue to make you feel better, but you waved her kind comments away. "Look, it's ok. It's my dad. He hasn't got long left and when I saw him on Sunday he just looked like a fucking skeleton." She sprang from her seat and pulled you up into a strong hug, one which you returned strongly. 

"I'm so sorry, (F/N)," she whispered. "Please don't neglect yourself though. You need to eat, you need to sleep. And you need to lay off the booze a bit." Pulling back, she held you at arm's length and looked at you with concern. "Promise?" Fighting with everything you had, tears were held back and a nod given.

"I'll try Hange, I promise."

The two of you hugged again just as Levi rounded the corner and saw the embrace, but instead of coming over to berate your behaviour, he turned and walked away. Whatever was going on, you needed the comfort of another human being, a comfort that he wasn't sure he had the ability to give; emotions were not his strong point. Not sure if he could wait until Friday, he considered messaging you to ask if you were ok or wanted to meet up. Still having that internal argument, he saw a timid looking member of staff rushing down the hall. "Don't fucking run, you shit." Words were spat with malice as he marched away to his office. 

Sinking down into his leather couch, the stern man pulled out his phone, screen open on a blank text to you and with a deep breath, he tapped out what he wanted to say and hit send before he could change his mind. Small piece of plastic and glass shoved back in a pocket, he moved round to the computer to see what shower of shit awaited him.

Across the office, Hange had scurried off to another meeting and you turned to your own phone, light announcing a message and your eyes widened slightly as you saw who it was from. You'd been working on the same assumption that Friday night would be your time to speak, but maybe that had served its purpose already, the relationship having taken a sharp turn after the last encounter. Reading his text, you actually smiled for the first time in days. "(F/N) you look like shit. Drink tonight?" Such a charmer, you thought as you responded to his brash words. 

"Thanks, always nice to get showered with compliments. Drink would be great, bar at 7?" Putting your device away, you got back to work with a bit more enthusiasm than you had before.  
Levi read your reply, quietly glad that you'd accepted the offer. He confirmed the time and place and sat in silence for a while, wondering what it was that had you looking so fucked up.

~~~~~~

You both sat in the usual place, standard bottle and glasses on the surface as you explained what was going on. Levi listened closely to your sombre story and watched with an intense stare. Like Hange, he was worried about your appearance - it was understandable, but not healthy in the slightest. He wasn't exactly the right person to be casting concern over drinking habits and lack of food, but he'd always looked like he did. However, the woman next to him had changed in a matter of days.

"(F/N), listen to me." You looked up at serious grey eyes as they seemed to drill into your thoughts. "I know its shit and nothing I can say will make it better, but you must take fucking care of yourself." With a small grunt, (e/c) orbs were rolled. 

"You sound like Hange." He took mock offence at being compared to his subordinate and you laughed lightly at his expression of distaste. The mood turned again as he spoke in a low tone. 

"I mean it. Don't let yourself wither away." Something about the look on his face made you stop and consider your self-destructive behaviour and for the first time you realised that it wasn't just you that was getting hurt. 

"Levi, thank you. You're right." Raising a glass in a silent toast, you smiled at your new friend. 

The bar hadn't been visited for long and the pair of you only shared one bottle of wine. Annie was working and you'd spoken briefly with her before leaving; she had been the first person that you called on Sunday to speak to about the situation with your dad and a good chat was held that afternoon.

Cold night air pinched at your face as Levi walked you home in silence. As you approached your building at a relatively sensible time of evening, you turned to thank him once more and he nodded, leaving you with words of warning. "You text me or call if you need anything. Don't be a fucking idiot." You smiled at the way he pointed like he was telling you off, a way to conceal the concern he must have felt inside. Grabbing his finger, you moved it like you were shaking hands and replied to him with a grin. 

"Sure thing Levi." Not moving anymore, you didn't take your touch away from him just yet and held on, eyes locked. His silvery gaze was mesmerising as you felt your stomach fluttering, pools of intense colour holding you in place like a kind of hypnotism. Mentally snapping out of it, you brought your hand back down to your side and smiled. "Thanks again. See you tomorrow?" Lips twitching to hide a smirk, he instead simply nodded and walked away.

As he left, Levi shook his head at himself. What the hell was he getting himself into and why the fuck did you have such an effect on him? Breathing in deeply, he strode quickly home, unable to banish the thoughts that he had in his mind, ones of protection, growing attraction and unprecedented desire.

~~~~~~

Friday morning was when it all came crashing down around you and a call at 4.02am confirmed the news you'd been waiting for - your father had died, peacefully in his sleep ten minutes previously. You pulled on whatever clothes you could find, brushed over teeth quickly and literally ran to the care home down deserted streets. Walking through the familiar corridors, you felt like you were floating, legs moving of their own accord as they took you to your dad's room with automatic movements. The coroner was already in attendance and left to allow you a moment. Standing over the prone body, you gazed over the residual existence of the loving, caring man before you and bent slowly to place a shaking kiss on his cold forehead. You stroked his cheek and looked at the serenity on his face; he was finally free. Selfishly, so were you.

The medical examiner handed over a leaflet as you left, full of helpful information on what you needed to do following the death of a loved one. Sympathetic words and pictures stared up at you from the paper and you shoved it in your pocket. He had no assets that needed to be sorted out as they were all in your name already. It would only be a matter of settling the account with the care home, notifying relevant authorities and arranging the funeral. You were his only living family, so it would be a small affair. People from the bar would come of course, as some had been his regulars long before they were yours.

Wind whipping at your hair, you stood on the roadside and watched as the small unmarked van took away your father's remains. Taking out your phone, you typed out a short message to a tiny group of recipients. "He's gone." Pressing send, the news made its way invisibly to those you cared about and people who would in turn care to hear of this event - Hange, Annie, Ymir and Levi. As you trudged back home, your pocket buzzed and the item was pulled out again, screen showing that Levi had replied. 

"Don't come in today. Talk later. I'm sorry (F/N)." Short but sweet, but you would expect nothing else. He must get up as early as I do, you thought as it was only just past 5am.

The others had called during the course of the morning to offer condolences and express their sorrow for you. Actually, you felt a kind of relief - your father was no longer locked away inside that frail body and you wouldn't have to see him suffering anymore. It was a really horrible thing to think, but you had also been released from the pain.

Your time so far had been spent making calls and necessary arrangements as there was no need for any delay, the funeral set up for Monday. You were not one for hanging around and prolonging it would only bring more pain; this day was always going to come, sooner rather than later. The grieving process had actually begun on Sunday and any anger or rage at the situation had already been dealt with.

A small notice had been created on your computer and you printed a few, intending to place them on the walls of the bar tonight to let any relevant patrons know of his passing and the details of the funeral. The organised part of your personality that helped so much in your day job was in full flow and by 2pm, everything had been sorted. Keeping Levi's words in mind, you made yourself some soup and a sandwich and sat in relative silence, eating it hungrily.

As you were nearly finished, your phone vibrated again, the pale man's number flashing in front of you. Trying to chew the food quickly, you picked up his call. 

"Hi." It was quiet for a moment and then his low voice came over the receiver. 

"How are you?" 

"Better than I thought I would be, if I'm honest. It's like he actually died on Sunday, that was when I knew, so I think I've kind of come to terms with it all already." You heard him hum in the distance. 

"Have you eaten?" Smiling, you imagined him scowling in his office. 

"Yes mum, I've eaten." A sound came through, loud and clear. 

"Tch. Fuck off." You laughed lightly, convinced he was now glaring at the wall or something, then you realised what day it was.

"Listen, I'm going to be putting up some fliers in the bar tonight to let dad's old regulars know that the remembrance is on Monday, so I'll still be around tonight?" 

"Won't your friends all be wanting to talk to you?" You had been planning on catching up with Annie and Ymir this afternoon, but Hange was a problem and you knew she would be there, but you didn't want to have to separate your friends, so decided to leave it in Levi's hands. 

"Hange will be there, she told me she was going to come over after work with Mike. So it's up to you." Waiting patiently, you played with the crumbs on the plate, pushing them round in circles. 

"(F/N), I'll be honest." His words startled you out of the random food drawing. "I can just about handle her in the office for short bursts, let alone in a fucking confined space all evening." You snorted with a small laugh as he continued. "But I want to see you." Stupidly, your stomach started to prickle with butterflies as he said the statement with such power. "Can we meet up later in the evening?" Smiling, you understood his request. This relationship of trust and free speech was still in its infancy, delicate almost; to bring others into it now would threaten everything and you were not prepared to do that.

"Sounds good, Levi. Is 11 too late?" He clicked his tongue again. 

"Of course not, you idiot. Not exactly past my fucking bedtime, is it." With a sigh, you shook your head. 

"Whatever, moody. Ok, so 11 at mine?" More silence. Maybe that sounded a bit too much like you were asking him round for something else and you sat nervously, waiting for his reply. 

"As long as you keep the agreement." Agreement? He spoke once more before hanging up. "No funny business and keep your hands off. I'll bring some fucking decent wine this time too."


	5. Goodbye

Leaves crunched beneath your boots as you walked slowly down the street. The afternoon sun was low, wind blowing (h/c) hair into your face, making it hard to see and you held small papers tightly in your grip for fear they would be swept away. As soon as you walked through the heavy bar doors, two bodies jumped onto you in a huge embrace. Hugging back, you were glad to have such caring friends and they pulled away to look at you, half expecting to see a crumbling woman. What they did see surprised them.

You looked normal, but of course they hadn't seen your worst state at the start of the week. Annie led you over to the counter and the three of you stood behind it as she poured small shots for each of you before raising hers - she'd worked here under your father's ownership not long before you took over, so she had known him also. "Family." One word was all the blonde said as the trio downed small drinks. Ymir looked at you closely. 

"I know it's a stupid question, but how are you (F/N)?" Shaking your head, you placed your glass onto the surface and tried to explain. 

"I'm ok. When I saw him on Sunday, I knew he didn't have long left and I started to grieve. Up until I came in here on Wednesday I was fucked." You told them about how you'd basically looked like a homeless person in smart clothes, had totally neglected to nourish your body and felt you were spiralling. "By the time I got the news this morning, I had already accepted it, to be honest. He's at peace now, not stuck in that chair in that fucking home with nothing."

Your friends nodded and rubbed your arms with understanding. The papers you had brought in were sitting on the top of the surface and you looked over at them. "I thought I'd stick these up. There's a lot of people still come in here that were close to dad." Annie's eyes clouded over at the picture of your father, so full of life as he stood holding a full pint of beer, grinning widely in front of this establishment, his pride and joy. Words announced his passing and detailed the time and place for the funeral. Ymir smiled lightly. 

"Trust you to have everything sorted out already," she said warmly. Shrugging, you turned to start putting the fliers on the walls. 

"You know me, Ymir. Organised to the point of being anal about it."

The evening moved on and the bar became more crowded. Eren had offered his sympathies and gave you a small hug before blushing and running off; for someone so good at flirting, he was hopeless at physical contact. Older customers came in waves with condolences and stories, talking passionately about the friendly man that used to run their favourite place to drink. Cuddles were frequent and a few kisses had been placed on your cheek.

Standing watching the slightly sombre mood in the crowd, you were aware of someone smelling your hair. Turning, you were met by Mike's serious face and you tried really hard not to laugh as Hange came bowling over, squeezing you tightly. "(F/N) I'm so sorry, can I do anything? You need any help with plans? Or can I presume that you've already done everything like usual?" 

"Of course I have Hange," you smiled. "And thank you, I'm fine though." Nodding she seemed to understand perfectly. 

"I know (F/N). I saw you mourn already. Is it like a weight's been lifted in some way?" How did she always sense these things? It was freaky. 

"That's exactly it, you know me too well." You hugged again and she turned to introduce her boyfriend properly.

Before you knew it, 10.30 arrived and it was time for you to leave. In all of the talking and embracing, you'd hardly had a chance to have a drink and you were gagging for one. "Annie, I'm going to shoot off now. I need to rest." She looked sceptical. 

"Where's your friend today then, (F/N)? You would have thought he'd be here to support you too?" Smiling with fatigue, you leant over to speak. 

"It's complicated, trust me." Her eyebrows raised, but she said no more on the subject. 

"Take care, (F/N). See you tomorrow?" Nodding, you waved goodbye to her and Ymir and said farewells to everyone you knew on the way out, excusing yourself from the evening. Hange and Mike had already gone so at least you didn't have to go through what would probably have been a twenty minute parting.

As you reached your front door, you saw the man who moved in down the hall a few weeks ago. He was huge, yet something about him looked like a typical gentle giant, like the carer at the home, you thought. He was clean shaven at all times, always dressed like he had just been to the gym and you waved over, realising you didn't even know his name. He smiled widely and shot a small two fingered salute as both of you entered your respective apartments.

Nearly 11. You checked your place over and saw it was sufficiently tidy, being quite house proud when you wanted to be. Before you could take your coat off, the buzzer sounded and you made sure it was Levi, pressing the button to let him up. A few minutes later and there was a knock at the door, soft and the total opposite to how you'd imagined it to be. Opening up, you were met with the sight of a pale man holding a bag full of bottles and you looked down, eyes narrowing. "Just how long were you planning on staying here?" 

"Tch. You going to let me in or what?" Standing aside, you gestured using an arm to allow him to enter and you took his jacket, hanging it up and moving to get a couple of glasses, TV as usual grumbling away in the background. Levi brought the drinks over to the kitchen and set them out on the surface, lining each different label up so they were all visible. He pointed and purred in that inimitable voice. "These are some nice wines, (F/N). I wanted to bring some along so you can try them. Not all at fucking once." Grinning, you walked over to stand next to him. 

"Which one do you recommend?" Thinking over the selection, he picked one out and you passed him the corkscrew. As delicate hands worked on the bottle, you realised you'd actually been a bit too close as he elbowed you in the cheek by mistake.

"What the fuck are you standing so near for, brat?" You took that as an apology and made your way to the couch, curling up into the cushions that sat on the dark brown piece of furniture. Two drinks were delivered and you were joined on the seat, his leg millimetres from where your foot lay. Both of you took a long gulp and you realised just how much it was needed. Sighing, you lay your head back and stretched, toe brushing down Levi's thigh. You didn't want to make it awkward though, so just acted like it had never happened, flawlessly covering up your accidental actions. The man, however, was not so merciful. "Oi. I thought I told you, no funny business?" You looked over at him, a mischievous smirk on the male's features. Smiling back sweetly, you replied with innocence in your voice. 

"You said hands off, Levi. You said nothing about feet." His lips twitched as he fought back a smile, comfortable silence setting in. Although he didn't want to bring a dark cloud on the evening, he nevertheless knew he should ask the important question. 

"You ok?" His face was serious once more and you nodded, leaning down for a cigarette. 

"Yea, I really am. Ask me that on Monday though, you might get a different answer." He remembered you'd said that was the day of the funeral and wondered whether you wanted him to attend. Watching closely, he asked you the query out loud. Tilting your head slightly, you turned. 

"I would actually, Levi. If you don't mind?" A hand was waved to dismiss your concern. 

"I'll be there."

You sat in the quiet for a bit, sipping at drinks however an unspoken concern hung in the air, though - Hange. She would be coming, for you rather than your father and that might be a strange atmosphere to bring the situation to. Almost reading your mind, he spoke quietly. 

"I don't give a shit, (F/N). Let her come to conclusions and spread her shitty gossip." For the first time today, you actually felt close to tears as you looked up at his steely gaze, smiling broadly at the statement and you squeezed his thigh. 

"Thank you. I really appreciate it." He grunted, trying to look bored but failing miserably as he glanced down. 

"Hands, (F/N). Hands." Playfully, you jumped away as if you'd felt an electric shock, pretend horror on your face. He had lightened the mood expertly with one grumpy comment and Levi stared as you laughed lightly at his words, wondering if you knew how much he actually wanted your hands all over him right now. But he kept quiet, internally calculating how long he was going to be able to keep his cool for.

A few hours passed and you felt extremely tired. You'd spoken about your father at length, telling stories of how he used to be, all the while listened to intently and your companion even offered up some stories of his own, of how he never knew his parents and had been raised by his uncle, a man who didn't sound like a very savoury person at all. The second wine had been your selection, one as nice as the last, rich and full of flavour. Grey eyes spotted your fatigue and noted the time. 

"I'd better be going (F/N). You're starting to look like shit again, you need some sleep." Sticking your middle finger up, you pouted but knew he was right and you were informed that the wines would be left behind for you, an education into the finer things in life. That had earned him another playful scowl as you stood at the open door, saying goodbye. "Sleep well." 

"And you, Levi. Thank you." He frowned and flicked you on the head with his finger. 

"You don't have to thank me for spending fucking time with you, idiot." Light orbs flashed as he spoke, showing you it wasn't meant with any offence. 

"Ok, grumpy ass." 

~~~~~~

The day of the funeral had arrived. Depressing, wintry rain fell and the skies were dark as you got dressed slowly. You had no idea how many people would turn up, but it didn't matter. There would be a small, short service with a reading by the priest but you would not be speaking - all that was needed to be said had occurred on that last visit and you had no desire to sit and write something for the sake of ceremony. It didn't mean you loved your father any less, you just didn't care for the traditions that seemed to be forced upon humanity.

Looking at the clock, you buttoned your long dark coat and made your way to the ground floor. Outside, two black cars had pulled up by your building, the first containing a smooth wooden casket that your dad's body now lay in, small floral tribute along the side. Taking a deep breath, you walked to the second vehicle as the driver opened the door to let you slide in. A short ride later and you reached the crematorium, your father very explicit in his instructions while he was still coherent. No burial. He didn't like the idea of being that close to worms, having a rather cute phobia of anything slimy and wriggly. As you pulled up, rows of people lined either side of the entrance, sombre and darkly clothed and you gasped slightly at just how many of them there were, gently helped from the car by the polite chauffeur. You thanked him warmly and turned to look across at everyone.

Most of the crowd was made up of familiar faces from the bar, almost all men and a few older ones that you didn't know. Presumably word had spread from Friday night and friends contacted friends, bringing everyone together again. At the front were Annie and Ymir, holding hands and looking tearful. Hange stood behind them, concern on her face and next to her was Levi. He stared over and you caught his expression, nodding slightly to thank him again as you walked over to stand with the four of them, members of the crematorium staff gently picking up your father's coffin. As they walked down the middle of the gathered mourners, people bowed their heads in respect.

They moved to the front of the small chapel and placed him down on the plinth. As was required by tradition, you walked in first, followed closely by your friends, everyone filing into the echoing room slowly, no one speaking.

It smelt funny in here, you thought. Churches and such like always smelt funny. Musty, almost. The light was dim, wind outside battering leaves and rain against the windows and the sound of feet on the stone floors echoed around as you stepped up to the front and stood by the bench. Although it was usually only for family, you were the only one left so your friends moved in next to you, two on each side. Glancing up at them all, you shot looks of gratitude and presumed they had discussed the formation before you'd arrived. 

Light organ music was playing over a speaker in the background as everyone took up position and you turned, realising there weren't enough seats for everyone, soul lifted by how much your father had impacted on people's lives. The thought made your heart swell with pride as you watched a small crowd form in neat standing rows at the back of the chapel. Heavy doors were closed against the stormy weather and you turned forwards once more.

The priest asked you all to be seated, those at the back excused and the shuffling sound of clothes and creaking wood could be heard. He spoke about your dad, having been provided with information on his life by you and a couple of stories from his friends. There were a few small chuckles at some of the tales, but mostly silent remembrance. No hymns were sang as your father had hated them and soon it was time again to stand. Machinery whirred and the coffin began to move slowly out of the room, into a curtained hole in the back wall. Tears ran silently down your face and you felt someone holding your right hand. Levi squeezed tightly in support but stayed looking straight to the front, as did you.

And with that, your last remaining parent was gone. Music began to play softly again, signalling the conclusion and people began to leave. You spoke with the priest to thank him for the lovely service, as was tradition yet again and he offered you some words of support, patting your shoulder warmly. Smiling lightly, you turned to exit and made your way around to the memorial garden, your friends flanking you protectively.

Umbrellas were everywhere as you walked to see the small plaque that lay neatly in line with others and one of the staff passed you something; it was the small flower wreath that you'd picked out on Friday and you laid it down with care. Staying crouched, you kissed your finger and placed it on the gold plate that bore your father's name. "Bye dad." You could only manage a whisper and your knees hit the ground, finality of it all becoming overwhelming as you bowed your head, sobbing loudly and unaware of the rain that beat down on you heavily, turning your hair into wet strands that hung in front of your face.

You felt hands grabbing tightly as figures appeared on each side of you, Annie on your left and Hange on the right, holding on to your arms. Slowly, they lifted a non-resistant body and you stuck your head into the older woman's coat as she hugged you close. The blonde placed her arms around you both and Ymir stood with a stern face, trying to hold it together. Levi placed a large umbrella over the crying women, expression unreadable save for the sorrow in his soft eyes and the gathered mourners looked to the ground, respecting the moment and thinking their own words of loss.

Looking up finally, you smiled faintly at the two similarly tear-stained females, not needing to tell them how thankful you were. You moved off to make the short walk back to the bar where the wake would be held, naturally. The three of you were still clinging to each other tightly as the journey continued, other two close behind, umbrella still held out. The rest of the crowd followed and you wondered what you must all look like, a long line of people clad in black.

You broke from your friends and stepped back, hugging Ymir and thanking her. She remained stoic, not one to show emotion easily, much like the man you now moved to and he threw his left arm round your shoulders, pulling you in. "Thank you for being here, Levi." Not switching the forward gaze, he muttered his response. 

"No worries, brat." The pair of you walked in silence until a thought popped into your head suddenly. Looking up, you whispered. 

"What did Hange do when she saw you?" Imagining all manner of crazy situations, you were actually surprised by the reality. 

"Nothing." That was unexpected and you frowned.

"Nothing? What the fuck?" He simply shrugged. It would come at some point though, you knew that and when it did, god knows what she would be like. Arriving at the destination, you unlocked the doors and pushed against their familiar weight. Inside was empty save for Eren, man standing solemnly behind the counter and a large spread of food sat against the wall, although eating was the last thing on your mind right now. You stepped to one side with your four friends and welcomed everyone in. As they entered, you greeted people, were introduced to some and by the time they'd all come through, you were exhausted and in desperate need of a drink. Locking up, you saw how your hand trembled against the key and quickly moved to place a sign in the window. "Closed today for personal function." So stale and clinical, however you hadn't wanted to write a whole sob story on it.

Ymir approached and you glanced over as she spoke. "I'm going to help Eren out. He looks like he's about to go insane." You thanked her as she walked away, aware of how the newest member of staff would be struggling and you took your coat off, hanging it on the back of a chair. Seeing how the garment dripped with rain, you could only imagine what you looked like so excused yourself, rushing to the lady's room. Finding a small comb in your bag, you tried to lessen the damage and ended up with vaguely acceptable hair. Holding the sink with both hands shaking, you looked into the mirror, breathing deeply to steady yourself. "It's done. It's over. Rest now." The words were spoken at a reflection, but directed to your father and a sense of calm drifted over you - peace and final alleviation. 

Someone had made a clever decision and gathered some glasses along with bottles of red and white wines, some dark brown scotch along with beers, setting them out on the end of the bar so people could just help themselves - it would ease some congestion. Silently thanking whoever thought of it, you grabbed a wine and found your way back to the front door. Levi appeared with two cigarettes and you smiled gratefully as you let yourself outside. Luckily, the small patio was covered, keeping the moist weather at bay but you shivered, wind showing you how stupid it was to be stood out here in only a dress. Gulping your drink greedily, you relished the taste and a quiet Monday afternoon.

"I'm just waiting for Hange to jump on me, you know," you said, exhaling thick smoke. "I'm not looking forward to that experience." Levi nodded lightly and both of you stared out at a random point in the distance. 

"Tch." You stayed quiet, knowing there was more to come. "Fuck it." Laughing softly, you turned to look at the man next to you. 

"Yea Levi, you're right."

Back inside, you made your way to the counter once more and grabbed two glasses, passing one to the dark haired man who had followed you. Drinking deeply, you gazed around at everyone here, all chatting - some looked sad but most were laughing at anecdotes and memories. Closure. A weight lifted. That's how you felt. Out of nowhere, a face popped into your vision. "Can I show you something, (F/N)?" Rolling your eyes back to Levi as you were dragged away, you knew the time had come. Finding a quiet corner, Hange grabbed your shoulders so you couldn't escape. "May I ask, what the fuck is shorty doing here?" She wasn't angry, her face was full of shock and you realised she must have been holding it all in so as not to cause a scene at a funeral.

Shrugging, you sipped your drink with a demure air. "He wanted to be here for me, like you and the girls." Truth, but totally lacking in any level of detail that the woman in front of you required. 

"(F/N), don't act so sweet and innocent. Is he your new man friend they told me about?" She looked ready to explode; it was as adorable as it was scary and you imagined her glasses getting steamed up at the prospect of gossip.

"Yes Hange," you sighed. "I don't really understand it all myself to be honest, but we have a lot in common. And despite the fact that he can be an asshole sometimes, I actually enjoy his company." Her eyes got even wider before they narrowed into mischievous slits. 

"So tell me, is he a good lay?" Typical. 

"Hange!" You shouted a bit too loudly and saw stares of surprise from all around. Lowering your voice, you continued. "It's not like that, all we do is talk." She looked like the earth had shattered from underneath her. 

"What the hell, (F/N)? After all the dirty thoughts you've had about him, I would've thought you'd have been all over that guy!" You laughed and shook your head, leaving your devastated friend to stand and process the information. Not that it hadn't crossed your mind, you thought. On many occasions.

Making your way back, you saw Annie and Levi talking. Well, exchanging a few curt words. You imagined a conversation between the two would be extremely painful to hear and wondered what they were attempting to chat about. As you approached, the female stepped forward and gave you a hug, whispering in your ear. "I reckon he is dying to get into your panties, (F/N)." 

"What the fuck Annie, why?" She smirked. 

"I can tell." You waved her apparent psychic abilities away with a tut and she walked off, shooting a grin over her shoulder. Well, now that thought was in your head. Great.

Levi had picked up two more glasses for you both and you smiled in appreciation. "Don't thank me, you idiot. It's your fucking stock." You laughed, not having actually considered that fact but all you could think about was him and your underwear.

The wake continued into the night and only a few people remained. Hange had drunk-dialled Mike and he'd picked her up, giving you an apologetic look as he had to carry the woman to get her into a cab. Probably not the booty call he'd been expecting. Eren had gone home and you'd thanked him warmly for his help today in setting everything up. It turned out the glasses and bottles at the end of the bar had been his idea and you let him know how impressed you were; the brunette had practically skipped out of the building after that. Ymir had gotten a call from someone and made her apologies as she had a problem to deal with and you made a mental note to ask her if she was ok when you saw her next.

You, Annie and Levi sat on stools behind the counter, looking out over the handful of mourners. One by one, they came to say their goodbyes and then it was just the three of you that stayed. Sighing, you jumped off your seat and began to tidy up - the place was full of half empty glasses, leftover food and random litter. You stacked a plastic crate with items and picked it up with effort, however before you could make it to the dishwashers out the back, your friend stopped you, placing the load to one side and shaking her head. "Not your job tonight, (F/N). I'll deal with it in the morning." Smiling gratefully, you gave her a quick hug of thanks. She returned the gesture and told you that she'd lock up too, allowing you to get to your apartment after the long, emotional day.

Without argument, you went to find your bag and coat. Levi had his on already, unspoken agreement between you that would walk you home. Waving to Annie, you wearily stepped outside and lit a cigarette, passing one to your escort. As before, the trip was short and silent and you found yourself outside your abode again. You got closer to him and spoke. "Thank you for coming, Levi. It helped knowing you were with me." You reached out and touched his hand with a finger, like he had done the first time. 

His pale face softened slightly and he brought his palm up, cupping your cheek gently and rubbing his thumb lightly against your skin. You blinked slowly and smiled, leaning your head further into his touch. "My pleasure, (F/N)." Standing in the faint moonlight for what seemed like forever, you both suddenly snapped out of it and his hand came slowly back down into his pocket. "Sleep well." A suggestion of a smile crossed his features and you waved lightly as he turned to leave. 

"And you, Levi." 

As you lay in bed, a sighed sounded out. Your father was finally at rest and perhaps now, you could be too.


	6. Acceptance

Wednesday rolled round and you were back in the office. Both Hange and Levi told you to stay home the day after the funeral, orders you gratefully followed. The crematorium had called yesterday to solemnly let you know your father's ashes were ready to collect and you picked them up an hour later, modest urn now sitting on a shelf behind the bar, a fitting resting place for a man who loved his work so much.

Your usual flow of visitors stopped by, some with condolences as they had heard the news. Looking up, you saw the intern approaching and smiled as you placed your glasses down. "(F/N), d-do you have a minute please?" His blonde hair fell over his face and he stood nervously looking at his feet. Smiling wider, you pointed to the empty chair. 

"For you Armin, I have many minutes. Please, sit." He almost bowed and trotted round to the seat. 

"I wanted to say how very sorry I am for your loss, (F/N)." He had genuine sorrow written all over him and you appreciated his words greatly. 

"Thank you. How are you doing? Getting the hang of it?" The young man seemed shocked that you would be asking after his wellbeing, especially given your recent heartache.

"G-good, thank you. Yes, I think I'm getting there." He paused, deep in thought. "Although I am acutely aware that I don't really fit in around here." The troubled look on his face was gut wrenching and you took his hand gently to reassure him. 

"Neither do I. But like you, I'm good at what I do. So believe in your abilities and the rest will all fall into place." The small figure in front of you seemed to grow slightly taller as your words sank in. 

"Thank you, (F/N). I really appreciate it." He jumped up, a smile on his face and he waved goodbye as you grinned back. So sweet, you thought. He just needs to get a thicker skin and soon will be running the place.

Later in the day, you finalised a pack of paperwork that was needed for an important meeting - Levi's meeting, to be precise. There was a potential deal on the table and he would be speaking with the directors of the other company tomorrow, so needed the information today to prepare. You made sure, as always, that it was all neatly presented and clipped together, each page lined up with the next as you walked to his office. Having not spoken since the day of the funeral, you were looking forward to seeing him and made your way quickly down the halls, dark blue dress swinging around as you picked up speed, high shoes pounding across the carpeted floor.

You knocked and a familiar voice rang out. "Come." How friendly. Entering the office, you noticed how dark it was in here; there was no window and the door was solid wood. Lights were dim and a large leather couch took up most of the right hand wall. Levi sat behind his desk and looked up briefly as you entered, closing the heavy entrance behind you and announcing your business. 

"I've got the merger presentation." He pointed at the end of the table, eyes back at his screen. No hello. No thanks. Placing it down, you paused for a moment, his frustration growing more evident. 

"You waiting for a fucking round of applause or something?" Harsh words cut deep and you visibly slumped. He hadn't even bothered to look up as he spoke and something in you snapped.

"What the fuck is this, Levi?" You stuck your finger out, pointing between the two of you and finally, he raised his gaze. "Because I remember telling you, I don't take kindly to games. What sort of game is this?" You didn't raise your voice - when you were pissed, really pissed, you spoke calmly and quietly but that hold on sanity faded as the man in front looked through you like you didn't even exist. "Unless I'm terribly mistaken, we have been through shit, you and me. I told you things I haven't told a single living soul. And now, here we are and you're sitting staring at me like I mean absolutely fuck all." Stopping for breath, you saw him flinch almost imperceptibly, but you were on a roll.

"Fuck you, Levi. Fuck you." You were spitting your words out with pure venom, still pointing. "I can see I made a massive fucking mistake letting you in." Standing in the now quiet office, you dragged air in quickly, heart aching and lungs gasping. His eyes flickered down for a moment and then back up to yours yet still, he said nothing. "Are you actually fucking kidding me?" The exasperation was dripping through your entire being as you stood in the middle of the room, totally open and feeling uncomfortably exposed. The rawness of the last week overcame everything and you gave up. Turning, you mentally said goodbye to anything the two of you had ever been.

~~~~~~

Standing behind the counter, usual black clothes on, you scowled at the heavy wooden doors. It was Friday night, nearly 8pm and no sign of Levi. You guessed you hadn't expected him after what happened Wednesday, but part of you had been hoping. Annie appeared at your side. 

"No dark and mysterious friend today?" Grumbling back, you turned to her. 

"No. He's gone into pure asshole mode." She squeezed your arm and left you to stare at the entrance, not wanting to pick at what seemed to be an open wound. With a sigh, you decided to go outside to smoke but before you went, you downed a small glass of scotch, grimacing at the sharp burning in your throat. He had been a total dick, however still you wondered if maybe you'd in turn been a bit harsh.

The chilly fog that hung over the city danced around, clouding your view. Shapes moved through it, laughing and singing and you could barely even see the road in front, glow of your cigarette the only way anyone could tell you were standing there unless they were right next to you. With a sigh, you thought how apt the weather was; messy, clouded and depressing, just like your brain felt right now.

Out of the mist, a figure approached and you moved to the side to let them enter the bar but they didn't. Curiosity took hold and you looked over, the image of a man getting closer until you were inches apart. Levi's expression was stony, however the gaze he showed you was painful, full of remorse. Taking your right hand, he held it between both of his gently and you heard him breathe out shakily. "(F/N), I'm sorry." Anger still lingered as you waited impatiently. "I thought I could keep you at arm's length at the office, I was wrong." Not really understanding what he was getting at, you remained silent as he gathered his thoughts. "I will not treat you like that again. I might be a director there and I might have thought work can't be mixed with personal life, but it can. I won't let it get in the way of what we have."

Sighing deeply, you considered his words and took in the obvious strain in his grey eyes. Perhaps if it was anyone else that this had happened with, you would have told them to keep on walking and not to come back. But he was different. You were different because of him and you weren't going to discard whatever it was the two of you had over what now seemed like a childish hissy fit. Words came out of your cold lips with a slight smirk. "Levi, you look like shit. Drink?" Hearing the same offer he'd made to you by text last week lifted his heart. As you'd been thinking his apology over, the man had been holding his breath, hoping against all odds that you would realise how sorry he was and now you had just let him back in, absolved with one cheeky response.

You were outright smiling as you saw his orbs flash with life once more and he nodded, mouth curling up on one side into a small smirk. Taking his hand and moving to the door, you shot a warning to him without turning. "Don't piss me off again." He took his place in your usual booth, most of the patrons standing in groups so there wasn't a battle for a table. Slipping through the crowd, you beckoned Annie over. "You and Eren ok here?" you asked with an apology on your face. Smiling as she saw Levi, she nodded. 

"Course, (F/N). Don't forgive him too quickly." Laughing, you knew she was aware that you already had, unable to hold a grudge.

Glasses in hand, you sat closely, almost cuddling up together but not quite touching. "I know I'm an asshole, (F/N)." His usually commanding voice was quiet and his gaze down at the table so you pushed his arm playfully, enjoying the way you got a good feel of his toned bicep. 

"Only sometimes, Levi," you said with mischief in your tone. "But I can handle it." Now it was his turn and he nudged you gently, everything made better in a couple of childish gestures.

The pair of you had chatted on and off that night, nothing too serious today though. As was the norm, the male had walked you home and you'd parted with the same light brushes of hands, your heart melting that little bit more at his feather-like touch.

Now you were sound asleep, exhausted from the day when your phone buzzed crazily on the side, shattering slumber and seeming like part of a dream for a minute. Grabbing wildly, you held it closely up to your face. Shit. Not only was it nearly 3am but Levi was phoning and quickly you picked up the call.

"Urngh." It was all you could manage and there was silence on the other end. You looked at the screen to see if you'd missed him after all, but it was still saying you were connected. "Levi?" Concern grew as you heard a faint noise on the other end. 

"(F/N), I need to see you. It's urgent." Wide awake now, you sat bolt upright. 

"Levi are you ok?" More silence, then he spoke. 

"Can I come over?" Jumping out of bed, you talked to him as eyes scanned the apartment for mess. 

"Of course, come straight round." He muttered his thanks and hung up as you dashed across, clearing up dirty clothes and plates and ran back to the bedroom. Pulling a brush through your hair, you tied it back loosely and grabbed a large woollen cardigan, wrapping it round the vest and shorts that were your pyjamas and swiftly brushed your teeth, because if the taste in your mouth was as bad when it was coming out as breath, you would surely kill him with it.

Ten minutes later, your buzzer rang harshly and the receiver was picked up to confirm your visitor, finger pressing the button to let him up. You opened the door and the man that stood in front of you looked finished; he was drunk and not just coherent Levi drunk, this was almost blind, dribbling wasted and he stumbled in, collapsing on your couch. Sitting next to him, you looked over with worry and waited for him to speak. "They've gone," he said thickly. "Fucking gone." Confusion was replaced with the realisation that he was referring to Farlan and Isabel.   
"What? Where? How do you know?" He shook his head slowly.

"I went by their place, I have a spare key and all their stuff is gone. Packed up and pissed off without a single word. They just left me." He didn't cry, but looked so wretched as he sat slumped that you figured this was his version of tears.

Pulling him upright, you wrapped your arms round a limp body, holding tight in his moment of despair as he had done for you before. Loose arms curled around you in response as he was incapable of making any stronger an action and you let him stay like that, his head on your shoulder and just held him. After a while the man sat up, eyes blurry, hair hanging over his face and he looked in your general direction. "I don't know what happened, (F/N). Fucking whores." You didn't even try to talk to him about it in the state he was in so you pulled him up and led him to the smaller second bedroom, saying nothing. Levi followed like a lost child and made no protests as you took off his coat and sat him on the bed. Bending, you removed his shoes carefully, placing them to the side before making him stand again and without any thought other than getting him safely to sleep, you undid his belt and helped the frail man out of dark denim. Relief hit as you saw he was at least wearing boxer shorts.

Slowly, you walked him round the bed and got him in, guest complying without any argument throughout the whole thing and you brought the covers up to tuck him in. His lids were shut instantly and you sat on the edge, stroking his hair until you heard deep, steady breathing. Leaving, you shut the door quietly and went into the kitchen - the sight of seeing him at his most vulnerable had shaken you and you reached across the surface to grab the half empty bottle of wine and a glass. Sleep would not be easy as it was, let alone sober. Topping up the alcohol from your night out, you felt fuzzy quickly and shuffled off to try and rest yourself.

~~~~~~

You woke and glanced at the clock. 9.14am. Late for you to be getting up, but given the broken sleep you had, it wasn't surprising and a faint noise from the TV came from the other side of the door. Sorting yourself out in the mirror to be more presentable, you grabbed your cardigan and sighed deeply, readying yourself for what you would find in the main room.

The top of his head could be seen over the back of the couch and he turned as he heard you approaching. You sat down and looked up into his alcohol induced blood shot eyes, a look of sorrow on his face as he spoke softly. "I'm so sorry, (F/N). I didn't know who else to call. The only other two people I trusted have gone off somewhere without a fucking word." You placed your hand on his. 

"It's ok, I said you could call any time. And I think we're in a place where we can rely on each other a bit, yes?" He nodded. "Good. Now first things first. Tea or coffee?" He muttered his reply along with a thank-you.

He watched as you moved around the kitchen, silver shards tracing down your bare legs. Once you had made yourself a black coffee and a black tea for Levi, you brought them over along with some pain killers. Swallowing them down gratefully, he sipped delicately at his drink and your strong coffee slipped nicely down your throat as you waited patiently for him to speak. Both of you laid back into the soft seat, your feet up on the table to get more comfy, head resting on the cushioned upholstery. You closed your eyes against your own headache and missed him gazing once more at your legs. The man tipped his mug as he ran his stare up and down, taking you all in hungrily.

You turned to look sideways and he snapped up to return the contact, hoping he hadn't been caught. Noticing a flash in his orbs, you shrugged it off and drank instead. Levi appreciated that you hadn't prodded at him to talk and began to explain. "They won't answer their phones, my calls even get hung up on before its even rung twice." He looked into his tea. "I just don't fucking understand, (F/N)." You had no explanation to offer him, so took his hand like before. 

"I don't either, Levi. I wish I could tell you why." Rubbing his skin with your thumb, you had a thought. "Maybe if I called? They don't have my number." He looked at you, red speckled eyes widening slightly. 

"What would you say?" You shrugged. 

"Say I got their number from someone at the bar because I was concerned? They don't have any idea how well we know each other." It seemed a good plan, so he gave you his phone to copy the details from. Heart racing, you dialled Isabel, unsure of what you were going to come out with, winging it to a degree. The line connected and a confused hello came sounding through. "Isabel? It's (F/N) from the bar. I hope you don't mind, but I got hold of your number. I've not seen you guys for a while, you got me worried!" You tried to sound light and airy as Levi glared at the table. 

"Oh hi (F/N), no that's ok, don't worry. We're fine, just had to move away, you know? Sometimes places and people don't work out, so you have to start again?" How were you going to explain that to him? Keeping your fake smile plastered on, you replied. 

"Yea I know what you mean. Well, if you're ever back in the area, pop in and say hello!" You both gave your goodbyes and hung up.

Sighing, you looked across and relayed the short conversation; if he'd been upset before, he certainly wasn't know. He was furious. "How fucking dare she? Fuck them. Fuck them both." Shouts rang through the apartment and you sat quietly as he grumbled to himself. "Don't work out, what the actual fuck. Bastards." He seemed to snap out of it and sat taller. "Fuck them." His gaze was expressionless and he looked like he'd overcome his hangover already as he finished his tea. Glancing at you, he spoke in calm, measured tones. "What are you doing today?" You shrugged again. 

"Nothing, was just going to hang around in my pyjamas to be honest." He nodded, seemingly deep in thought. 

"Can I stay for a bit?" Smiling, you curled your lower limbs up and got comfy. 

"Sure. If you don't mind that I'm pretty much not moving from this position all day." A smirk danced across his lips as he crossed his legs and threw his arm back into the usual pose. 

"Sounds fine to me."

~~~~~~

It was dark when Levi eventually got up to leave, fatigue setting in. You'd spent the day watching TV and chatting sometimes, the comfortable silences between you more frequent than words, but it was not an issue. Both of you had smoked too much and you ate an obscene amount of junk food, companion just sticking to his tea. A few sly remarks had been made, bordering on flirting but not quite crossing that line and once 4pm came around, it had been deemed acceptable drinking time and you fetched some wine for you both. 

Three hours later and he was flagging, having had next to no sleep and as you walked him to the door, he turned and looked into your eyes. "Thank you, (F/N). I'm glad you understand." You smiled and nodded, squeezing him softly on the shoulder. 

"Any time. And yea, back at you. Fuck ups should stick together." He looked like he wanted to say something else, but instead he bid you farewell, a small smile on his lips.

A few hours passed by as you stared gawking at the TV watching pure trash, light buzz of alcohol settling over you as eyes dropped. Your phone vibrated urgently and you snapped out of the short snooze to see an unknown caller ringing. Picking up, you answered with growing unease. "Hi (F/N)? Its Isabel again." You plastered on your cheery persona instantly. 

"Hi there, you ok?" A few seconds of nothing and then she spoke again, almost whispering. 

"You know big bro, right?" Fuck fuck fuck fuck. 

"Yea, kind of. We work together. Why?" Keep it calm, keep it smooth. She cleared her throat quietly, child-like voice cutting quickly through the phone again. 

"Can you keep an eye on him? I mean, I don't like how we just left. Farlan found something out and wanted to get away to, erm, be together." So, it wasn't just brotherly love after all and you hummed for her to go on. "So, I'm not happy about it but, you know, you gotta do stuff you don't wanna do sometimes, right?" Ok, this was getting weird, cryptic and confusing. 

"Isabel, what did he find out?" You figured she was hyperactive as usual and chanced it. 

"Oh nothing, nothing, just something from the past. He hasn't actually told me the whole story. So, can you watch big bro for me? He needs someone." Wasn't that the truth. 

"Sure I will," you said with conviction. "Just let me know if you need someone too though, yea?" That kind instinct of yours kicked in, knowing that she was trying to have this chat unheard by anyone. By him. She giggled lightly and it sounded like a music box. 

"Will do, (F/N). And thanks for being so cool." You said goodbyes and ended the call. Shit. Scrolling through contacts, you glanced at the time. 11.23pm. Levi would probably be asleep but you had to tell him - the whole basis of whatever your relationship contained was entrenched in trust and honesty. Hitting the green button, you held your breath.

"Agngh." Yea, he'd been asleep. You heard shuffling noises and imagined him looking at his phone to see what was going on. "(F/N), you ok?" Quickly, you tried to ease the tension in his voice. 

"I'm ok, don't worry. But Isabel just called me back." Not wanting to alarm him, you continued. "She told me some vague stuff about why they left. Do you want me to tell you now or wait? You need to sleep." Letting it sink in, you waited for his response and silence ticked by as he tried to consider. 

"Is anyone in danger, (F/N)?" His low tone was thick with slumber as he attempted to figure out whether this needed to be discussed urgently. 

"No, nothing like that. Talk tomorrow?" A murmur came across the phone signalling that tomorrow would be good and the call ended.

~~~~~~

This Sunday morning was filled with anxiety, but not for the usual reasons. You sat fidgeting with the buttons on your long red checked shirt as you waited for Levi to come over, not looking forward to his reaction to what you had to tell him. A buzz rang loudly and you complied with the shrill request. Soon, the man arrived at your door which was already open with you standing at it and offering him a faint smile, you asked him in and he took up his place on the couch. You'd already made tea and coffee, it was still early and he took his cup delicately with thanks as you curled up on the soft seat next to him, not caring that your upper arm was pressed against his. Jokes had been made in the past about keeping hands away, but this was not the time and he enjoyed the feeling of your warmth.

You began to tell him about the short conversation with his old friend, pale and delicate features darkening as the explanation went on. As you finished, you sipped at coffee and let him digest the words just offered to him, staring straight ahead. His voice startled you as it came out in a long, poisonous whisper. "Mother fucker." You turned, realising you were now ridiculously close to his face and Levi shook his head in disbelief, letting out a small, humourless laugh. 

He looked over, slightly shocked by how near you were but didn't flinch. "Ok (F/N). Now it's my turn to tell you a story." His breath danced over your nose, the scent of tea drifting across and you stared intently into each other's eyes; it was an exquisite feeling, despite the fury that was clear on his expression. Keeping calm, you nodded once and finally broke contact by leaning over to grab two cigarettes, heart beating hard in your chest at the moment you had just shared.

Levi began to speak. He told you of his past, before rehab, before Farlan and Isabel and you listened to his every word. Silently, you watched as he explained with regret about how he had been a criminal, stealing and mugging to pay the bills. This was something he'd learnt from his Uncle and after getting a degree in financial management, he settled into to his old ways, the addiction to alcohol making him an altogether unsuitable employee. Ill-gotten money was spent on cheap booze and eventually he turned his hand to fighting for cash. Dark basements that were stinking of sweat and stained with blood became familiar surroundings and despite how much the whole thing disgusted him beyond belief, he made good cash that way.

Just before he had to admit defeat and borrow from his relative to get professional help, he'd done something awful. Levi stopped at that point and your apartment was shrouded in silence as he sat forward with arms resting on his legs, hair falling in front of his face, not wanting you to see him as he told the next part. "(F/N), I fucked up royally." His voice was thick with remorse. "A dirty shit of a man told me he would pay me an obscene amount of money to fight someone, as long as I made sure that when I knocked him down, he stayed down." You didn't need any more explanation to know what that meant. Dragging on another cigarette, he steadied himself to continue and felt your hand rest on his leg in support.

"That payday would have set me straight, got me out of the shit hole I lived in. But when it came to it, when I was actually there staring down at the guy, I couldn't." Another long pause. "That was until I saw the man that I had pinned to the floor held a knife and before I could stop what was happening, I grabbed it and did what I had to do to survive." He shook his head once more, still staring at the floor away from your gaze. "I got my money, I got out of there and went and got totally fucked, ended up losing everything I'd just earned on mindless gambling."

And that was when he went to rehab. After the months spent there, he wasn't totally sober but enough so that he could start to rebuild his life, get a job and a steady income. You sat quietly, noticing a glaring omission from what he'd said but you waited for him to offer the information. Leaning back against the sofa, you realised that regardless of what he had just confessed, it didn't matter. It wasn't who he was now and the action was one of pure need and self defence. Everybody has a story and it's how you move on and live your life now that means more. Levi broke the silence. "(F/N), the man I killed was Farlan's brother. I didn't realise until about five years ago when I ran into someone I used to know from back then." His voice came out shaky and low. "They didn't know it was me who'd been involved and it had become something of an urban legend. But he knew who the fucking dead guy was."

Eventually, he sat back again and turned to you, face dark and eyes clouded. You didn't let him speak first and cut over him softly. "I'm sorry, Levi. For everything you had to go through, everything you had to do. I'm here for you, no matter what." Squeezing his hand, you tried to let him feel your acceptance and care. "So he found out. What are you going to do?" The two of you remained in the same position for a while, leaning into soft cushions, gazes locked and minds wondering what the hell Farlan might do.


	7. Protection

A few weeks had passed and you heard no more from Isabel, hoping that their moving away was the only action they were going to take. You'd also discovered that the two brothers hadn't been that close and whilst Farlan probably didn't mourn at the loss, he most certainly thought that Levi had kept this from him out of malice for all the years they'd known each other.

Winter had fully taken hold, casting its icy breath across the city and you often found yourself sliding down the road instead of walking, but it did lend itself to beauty. The trees were a frosty white, sparkling in the low sun and decorative lights had started to spring up in shops and bars. Levi and you had spent every Friday night together in the normal booth and usually saw each other another day in the weekend at your apartment. As normal, you rarely bumped into each other at the office, which was probably a good thing given how it ended up before. Lingering glances and touches continued and you were finding it more and more difficult to contain the growing lust you felt, as was he. Flirtatious words were exchanged regularly, much to the amusement of your small group of friends and they kept pushing you to make a move, yet in all honesty, you were enjoying the thrill of the chase and anticipation.

You'd spoken with Ymir as she'd been increasingly stern since the day of the funeral and the call she took. Always one to keep to herself, she was reticent at first but finally admitted that she was in a relationship, one which was going through a rough patch. Apparently, your friend was a bit too clingy and overbearing, however you knew it was only through genuine care and hoped that her girlfriend, Historia, would come to realise it too.

Oddly, Hange had asked to meet you in a random venue this evening and ordered you to dress nice. Granted, it was your birthday but the last three you'd known her for had been spent in the bar. It fell on a Saturday this year, which meant you could enjoy yourself without worrying about getting up the next day.

Standing in a black underwear set, you considered the clothes in your wardrobe with a calculated eye. It was cold, so you had to accommodate for that. Deciding, you pulled on some sheer tights with a dark line up the back, channelling your inner fifties siren. Your dress was made from a tight dark jersey material and came down to just above your knees. The hem was detailed with black lace, the sleeves reaching your elbows and it was dangerously low cut, probably meaning you'd spend all night pulling it up self consciously. Regardless, you loved the red stitching around the neck line, slightly puffed shoulders and the deep maroon and brown print that reminded you of warmth. There was no need to bother with bracelets, Hange and all your friends for that matter had seen your scars, but only Levi knew why.

You stuck a pair of black patent heels on and touched up your dramatic eyeliner in the mirror. Small bag ready, you grabbed your coat and scarf and made your way out into the dark evening.

The meeting place was another establishment not too far from yours that had a winter-themed evening. You weren't really sure what that meant, but you were sure it would all become clear. Walking in, you were met by twinkling fairy lights in blues and silvers, large delicate frosty looking bunches of what you presumed were twigs that gave the effect of snow covered trees. Looking up, you saw more bulbs set into the ceiling, blinking like the night's sky. It was beautiful.

You turned your attention to finding Hange and in the corner you spotted a cosy booth, much like the one at your place but it was self-contained by a semi circular cushioned wall to offer more privacy from the others next to it. The wall sparkled as well, casting a glow on the table and your friend wasn't alone - all four of those dearest to you were there, sitting staring, most of them grinning. Levi looked slowly up and down as you took your coat and scarf off, his lips twitching, eyes gleaming silver. Table approached, you stood and pointed. "This isn't some sort of intervention, is it?" Laughter and cries of 'Happy Birthday' rang out as you shuffled in to sit closely to the only male here. 

"So (F/N), I hope you don't mind but we kind of closed the bar tonight?" said Annie and you smiled. 

"Of course not, this is fantastic! Thank you all so much." Hange clapped and ran off to get the drinks in after she quickly asked what everyone wanted, leaving you to look at Ymir with a question on your face; she stuck a thumb up, smirking. A grin broke out on your features, happy that she had made amends with her girlfriend.

The oldest woman returned with a tray full of glasses that were adorned with ridiculous decorations, fake snowflakes and streamers hanging all over them. The liquid inside was a frosty blue and as she placed them down, all eyes looked up in confusion. "I know none of you asked for this, but you're getting it. Its the special cocktail of the night and I wanted to keep in the spirit of things." You looked round to see Levi picking one up, studying it with pure disdain and it looked hilariously festive in his delicate hand, steely glare shooting across and filled with annoyance. Bursting out laughing, you covered your mouth and giggled even harder as he turned slowly to stare at the person responsible, his lip curling up with disgust.

After the cocktail incident, others took turns going to the bar instead. The recently happy member of a couple had run out to take another call and you thought about how she was supposed to be the clingy one. Hange was talking in conspiring tones to Annie but you couldn't hear what it was about as music thumped over the speakers and you relaxed back on the soft seats, left hand on your leg, right one holding a wine. Levi was watching the crowds and absent mindedly trailed a finger up and down your free arm, sending shivers across flesh that you tried not to react to. 

"Hange!" Both of you glanced across to see a shocked face, her glasses gleaming in the dim light. 

"What? All I said was Mike's got inches in all the right places!" She exclaimed this to the younger woman, not seeing how anything was wrong with that sentence. Not moving, you suddenly felt the man by your side roll his head to you, not lifting it from the padded wall so his lips were practically touching your ear and he whispered, breath sending your stomach into crazy butterflies. 

"Would you like to feel what my inches can do in all the right places?" Eyes widening, you stayed stock still, heat rising as you felt him smirking next to you. Slowly you turned, not sure how to react and your noses nearly touched. His expression was full of smugness and a glint flashed through his eyes as he saw your pink cheeks.

"Oh come on, for the love of fucking god Levi, just kiss her already!" screamed Hange. Way to kill the mood. Two people turned to her, glaring. 

"Hange, we're not performing monkeys that you can just get to do whatever you want, you know." Your retort was said with more than a hint of embarrassment and she winked, pointing at Levi. 

"Whatever shorty said to you just then, it sure looked like you would've done whatever HE wanted though (F/N)!" Blushing furiously, you elbowed Levi and growled at him. 

"Your round." Smirking, he got up and turned, stepping slowly sideways out of the booth so you got an eyeful of his crotch. You watched as he strutted off, evidently pleased with himself and loving every minute of the torture he was putting you through.

"(F/N), are you waiting to get married before you fuck him or something?" asked Annie, face as blank and expressionless as a brick. Frowning, you leant over to your friends. 

"Lay off. Anyway," you said, face filling with mischief. "I'm enjoying the teasing, actually." Hange spat out some of her cocktail and snorted with laughter just as the man got back. 

"Tch. Disgusting." That made her laugh harder as Ymir returned to god knows what kind of situation. You got up, intending to go for a smoke and the stern female touched your arm gently. 

"I'm sorry, (F/N)." She was slurring quite a bit and you hoped she hadn't had another argument. "Historia just thinks she has to save the world and to hell with me. Fucking signing up to go help orphans in some random country." Her grumbling was actually quite comical, given that she was annoyed at disadvantaged children and you tried not to smirk. 

"I'm sure she only means well, yea? Hey, before she goes, can I at least meet her?" She nodded slowly and trailed off to sit next to Annie, placing her head on the blonde's shoulder with a huff. It was getting late and the three women didn't have the resistance to drink that you and your pale companion held - it would be home time soon, especially as Hange was now dancing with some guy who looked terrified.

An hour later and Levi walked you to your building as you giggled at the memory of your friend's dirty dancing with the poor person back at the bar. Stopping in your usual spot, you turned to face the dark haired man. "Thank you, I had a wonderful time tonight. Even if you did practically shove your cock in my face." Your words were laced with naughty intent and he smirked, head tilted slightly as he replied. 

"Any time (F/N), any time." He came closer and whispered gently. "Happy birthday, (F/N)." His surprisingly soft lips kissed you on the forehead and he waved lightly, walking away before he could do anything else. Returning the gesture, your body was alight with desire at the simple action, waves of lust running through your veins, begging to be let loose and you struggled to keep them at bay.

As he walked home, Levi realised it wouldn't be long before he could take no more. Like you, he really enjoyed the teasing game of cat and mouse, but he had to have you soon, he had to make you his.

~~~~~~

You spent most of Sunday eating in front of the TV, texting your friends to see how their hangovers were and thanking them for last night. One came through from someone who had been sober and you felt a familiar feeling in your stomach as you read it. "How are you doing today, birthday girl? I hope you slept well. Did you dream about my cock in your face?" Oh, you're not getting away with that, you thought as a reply was tapped quickly with a sly smile. 

"Not just my face." Your heart raced with adrenaline as you hit send, realising this was getting dangerous now.

Across town, Levi stood in his kitchen wearing dark sweats, sipping tea as he saw your message. He gulped the mouthful of drink down swiftly before it could come flying out of his mouth and stared at your response with fire in his eyes. The subject of conversation began to twitch in his pants as heat rose at the simple four words in front of him, certainty settling in - it was on. Your flirting and often downright dirty exchanges would break soon, neither of you able to contain yourselves for much longer. Smirking darkly, he sent the final nail in the coffin. "Well, why don't you let me make your dreams come true, (F/N)?"

~~~~~~

You were still buzzing from the short but heated text conversation of Sunday as you walked towards the large meeting room. No more words had been exchanged since, they didn't need to be; you both knew what it meant and your stomach was in knots as you entered the impressive space that would soon hold a number of top executives. It was Wednesday today, all of your hard work on the reports and paperwork coming to fruition and you set out packs of information at the twelve places around the table, taking in the imposing room. Dark wooden walls, no windows. A huge computer screen with the company logo. Massive oak table that was polished to the point of causing glare from the soft lights above and your finger squeaked as you ran it over the surface.

Dropping one of the bundles of paper, you quickly bent to retrieve it just as the heavy door opened. You heard it click shut along with a small cough, shooting up to turn and apologise but your words got stuck in your throat as the sight of Levi in full business attire stood at the threshold, leaning against the entrance with such a casual pose. You smiled lightly as you saw him gazing down your body, grey eyes taking in your tight black dress that showed a slight amount of cleavage, one you'd picked intentionally as you knew the execs were mostly men. Not to be crude, however you didn't mind if it meant the department would get results.

The man before you looked hot. Damn hot. His suit was tight but perfectly tailored, thin black tie sitting on top of a crisp, white shirt and you walked slowly towards him, swaying your hips with each step. Stopping, you looked up, locking gazes - a small movement forward and the two of you would be pressed together as you stood almost unbearably close. Heart drumming in your chest, you bit your bottom lip and raised a hand, grabbing hold of his tie and pulling slowly, his face as near as you could get without touching noses. You tilted your head and moved forward so your mouth was at his ear, figure pushed up against his. Levi clenched his fists as he fought with every fibre in his body to stop from grasping hold of you there and then.

"You're looking fucking sexy today, Levi." Whispering, lips brushed against his lobe like a feather as your words came out and his voice was a deep growl as he nearly moaned a response. 

"Oh (F/N), what are you trying to do to me you little shit?" He was almost panting and you felt pressure against you from lower down. Not moving, you drawled once more. 

"Pleased to see me, are you?" You drew your head back and smiled sweetly, mouth millimetres from his. "Too bad we have a meeting in three minutes." Raising an eyebrow, you let go of the tie and patted his toned chest twice before walking suggestively to your seat.

"Fucking hell, (F/N)." He muttered lowly, watching your body as you snaked away and quickly smoothed himself down, trying to calm himself just as some members of the exec arrived. Greeting them with a stony expression, he turned to you as they had their back to him and shot a look over that let you know you were in big trouble. Your same saccharine smirk remained as you winked out of the view of the other men in the room.

The meeting was going well. Levi chaired it and you were there to provide background and further information on the figures they had in front of them. Your dress was working its magic and as you leant over to point at numbers for the benefit of the man next to you, the director gritted his teeth - that pompous executive was paying more attention to your breasts than the paperwork and he felt the animal desire to rip the guy's throat out. It wasn't lost on you, hugely aware of his protective nature and maybe some jealousy too, so you toned it down a notch.

As the meeting ended, one of the seniors took Levi by the arm and led him out of the room, talking excitedly. You saw grey slits looking down at the man's hand, hating the contact and he glanced at you over his shoulder to demonstrate he was in hell right now.

~~~~~~

You'd gone straight home after work, having received a text to advise that the person you desired so badly had shit loads of paperwork to attend to and that you'd better be wearing that dress again soon. Standing in your apartment, now in denims and a tshirt, you realised you hadn't checked the mail for days and grabbed your keys from the table. As you stepped out of the lift on the ground floor, you turned a corner into a small alcove off the main foyer to face the rows of metal boxes on the wall. Reaching on tip toes to open the relevant one, you cursed whoever had placed them so high up. "Fucking bunch of shits." Your voice rang through the empty marble hall as you stretched even further.

"Always the sweet mouth, (F/N)." The growl was surprising, but you didn't turn, knowing exactly who it was. 

"How did you get through the doors? You don't know the code?" Finally you spun slowly, skin crawling, hair on the back of your neck standing up. 

"I'm resourceful." You tensed your body as Jean paced forwards, a murderous glare in his eyes.

"What do you wa…" Your voice was cut off by a hand over your mouth and another round your throat. The smell of beer was strong as you struggled to break free. He pinned you against the wall, sending a violent kick to your right shin, then your left. Screaming through his hand, you felt shooting pain and tried to grab at his face. Jean's grip released but quickly grabbed your arms, pulling and twisting them at unnatural angles. You cried out and he let go, however before you could even try to retaliate, a foot connected with your stomach and you doubled over, coughing. A huge balled hand flew up and slammed into your face, sending you falling to the cold floor.

Lying panting, you tried to move but the agony was immense, form inflicted with various bursts of hot distress. "J-Jean…" You spoke with a tremble in your voice as eyes blurred. "People will be around soon, coming home." Wiping your mouth, you saw blood on your hand and he laughed, no humour behind it. 

"No they won't. I've been watching this place in the evenings for some time now. We have about half an hour before anyone comes in or out." The fact that his logic was probably quite flawed didn't cross your mind - he had been watching your building. That was a step up from his usual stalking.

Before you could say anything, he was on you, arms up above your head with one fist, stinking breath in your face from his grinning mouth. Your vision was foggy and body in too much pain to fight properly but you tried, tried so hard but he was pressing you into the marble tiles, free hand moving down. Squeezing your eyes shut against Jean's touch, you felt him working at your denims as you struggled to move. "Don't fight me (F/N). You know you want it." His disgusting words made your ears burn and stomach roll as you felt fabric being tugged away.

Letting go of your clothing, he loomed close, staring down with demonic eyes as his fist connected with your jaw again and you tried to speak, tried to scream as you sensed him pulling his own pants out of the way. "You're going to love this, (F/N). Trust me." His voice was slurred and you used everything you had to call out - neither of you had heard the lift doors open and neither of you saw the figure approaching round the corner.

Jean was pulled away, thrown across the floor and a large shape looked over quickly with a nod and then disappeared; all you could hear was grunts and yells as whoever had come to your aid seemed to be laying punches into your fucker of an ex. Then you heard fast footsteps receding, the faint sound of traffic for a few seconds, signalling that the one under attack had run out of the building. You managed to pull your denims up as the other person returned and you were picked up with care. Head spinning, you grabbed onto the man, gasping for breath.

The shape spoke. "I'm Erwin, from down the hall. You're safe now. He's gone." Thickly, with blood in your words you replied. 

"Thank you Erwin. Thank you." He placed an arm round your waist and led you to the lifts. "Levi." It came out in a muddy noise. 

"What's that?" He sounded confused. 

"Call. Levi." The blonde pressed a button, one of the the sets of doors opening instantly and on the short ride up you grabbed your phone and tried to find the right places to push to get the relevant number. Nearly dropping it, you clung to the device and swore. "Fucking shit." It came out in lisps of wetness and you found yourself outside your apartment. Fumbling, keys were located and the large man that provided support took them to let you in.

"What's your name?" You blinked to try to clear your vision before replying. 

"(F/N)." He took the phone from you, seeing the name you had been saying on the screen. Pushing call, he passed it over and within one ring, you heard a voice - you'd never called each other unless there was a damn good reason and he sounded worried. 

"Levi...Jean attacked me. I'm safe now but please...I need you." It all came out in a wave of grief and mumbled words as the item fell from shaking hands, retrieved by your saviour who spoke to whoever was on the other line. 

"My name's Erwin, I just moved in down the hall from (F/N). The man who hurt her is gone. She's been asking for you, can you come?" Levi stiffened slightly at the sound of a male but remained calm. 

"I'm on my way."

The short cab ride from the office seemed to take hours as dread ate away at him, late stay at work already causing anger. He pushed a finger at your buzzer incessantly, over and over until he heard the door click and with a short run, he jabbed at the lift buttons, about to lose patience when one arrived. Almost punching the floor number, the journey up felt like forever and as he approached your door, he saw it was ajar. The scene he was greeted with was gut wrenching; you were curled up on the floor in pain, a large man standing to one side with a faint look of confusion. Levi gathered you gently in his arms and felt a bitter pull of both sorrow and rage as he looked upon you, body bruised and broken, flesh showing from above your slightly fallen trousers and piercing grey eyes looked up at the tall male for answers.

"I was going out to the gym and I heard a shout," Erwin explained. "A guy was on her, struggling, so I pulled him off and got some punches in, but before I could stop him, he ran away. She was telling me to call you but she couldn't hold her phone, so…I picked it up." The pale man weighed this newcomer up in his mind, noticing the look of shock on his face, probably wondering what kind of apartment block he'd just decided to call home. 

"Thanks Erwin." The two men shared a nod and the largest left, shutting the door quietly behind him.

Strong arms helped with becoming upright and he sat you on the couch, head slumping down as the person you'd flirted terribly with earlier hurried to the bathroom and found a small first aid kit, looking through it as he returned. With care, he wiped you down with antiseptic cloths and tended to facial wounds, not wanting to think about your loosened clothing. Coherence returning, you looked up into his steely gaze. "I'm so sorry, I should have fought him off, I…" Placing a finger on your bloody lips, he silenced you. 

"It's not your fault. Don't apologise for that scum." His voice cracked ever so slightly with his next words. "Did he…?" Shaking your head, you looked down. 

"No. But he tried." He didn't show it through his cool exterior, but Levi hated that he wasn't there for you, to protect you from that fucking excuse of a man. "I need to shower." The man nodded and aided you towards the bathroom. 

"I'll be right outside." The door was almost closed, a crack remaining open so he would be able to hear if you felt dizzy or fell. Once you had washed the feeling of your ex away, you dried down, getting red stains on the towel. Flapping it out to wrap around a damp body, you noticed a bruise already forming on your stomach, two angry lumps on each shin and the reflection in the misty bathroom mirror was also patchy red, jaw aching. Walking to your room, you smiled lightly at Levi as you passed and quickly shoved yourself into some pyjamas.

Back in the living room, you saw two glasses of wine ready on the table and black hair was visible over the top of the couch. Sitting down with your glass in hand, you instinctively curled up to the man next to you and felt safe in the protective arm that held you close. The drink shook as your hand trembled and you took a long gulp of the red liquid, then out of nowhere, you snorted with a small laugh. Grey eyes looked down at where your head lay on his shoulder, wet hair soaking into his white shirt and he waited for an explanation patiently. 

"You must be fucking crazy, Levi."

"How so?" He didn't sound amused in the slightest and with a sigh, you continued. 

"Well, you have to ask yourself, just how much bad fucking luck can one person have? I'm afraid you seem to be making friends with someone who has an incredible amount of baggage." Your words came out a bit funny as your lip was starting to swell slightly. Draining your glass, you placed it down, feeling terrible that you had dragged him into your personal heap of shit, but before you could apologise again, he sat up, both palms delicately cupping your bruised face. 

"You and me both know there's enough baggage for the whole building just in this one room, (F/N). But it's not all yours." True. He had his share of demons too. Smiling weakly, you spoke an already uttered statement. 

"Fuck ups got to stick together." Hands down again, he rubbed your bare leg, nodding in agreement and watched as your face changed, eyes locked onto his. "Can you stay with me tonight?" There was no intent behind your words, voice devoid of any of the flirting that had been there before. No discussion was needed, no boundaries set as he instantly agreed. 

"Let me go get some stuff. Don't fucking press that button until you know it's me, (F/N)."

Levi had returned quickly, now dressed in sweats and a black t-shirt. He must have frozen on the way over, you thought and as he brought you in for a hug you felt his icy hands. "Shit, you should have worn a coat."

The two of you stayed up for a while, cuddled closely on the sofa under a thick fluffy blanket, watching shit on TV and covering up the pain with alcohol. There was only care in the light touches he gave and the evening was purely protective. He kept looking over, checking the bruising on your jaw and you kept the one on your stomach hidden, not wanting him to see the ugly marks. You hadn't cried or got upset, it would have been a waste to shed tears over that despicable fuck of an ex. Instead, you were more pissed off than anything, angry that you hadn't been strong enough to defend yourself.

Tiredness descended and you went to brush your teeth, leaving a spare one from the packet out for Levi. Before going to bed, you stood in front of the bathroom door, waiting for him nervously and as he walked out, silver eyes caught your expression and he frowned as you gave an explanation. "Can you come in with me please?" If you'd asked that this afternoon, he would have had a completely different reaction, however the unspoken words of understanding between you were strong. 

"Of course, (F/N)."

Lying under the sheets together, you nestled into his side, hand on a t-shirt as his arm came round to bring you closer. You felt safe in this embrace, the clean scent from his clothing calming and you were able to fall asleep quickly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know why I hate on Jean so much...sorry Jean...
> 
> And also apologies for relocating any reader's birthdays!


	8. Moving On

It was warm. Really nice and toasty as you opened your eyes and saw Levi gazing over with his mesmerising grey orbs. "Hey." He smirked slightly at your croaked greeting. 

"Hey yourself." You squeezed your lids shut tightly again and moaned. 

"Do I even want to ask what time it is?" You felt him move up on his elbow and lean across to look at the clock. 

"4.27am." Covering your face with your hands, you muttered to yourself. 

"Why do I have to get up so fucking early? Why do you get up so fucking early?" 

"Always have."

Gently, he held your chin in his forefinger and thumb and turned your head slightly. The lamp in the hallway that you always kept on at night provided him with light to look you over. "Shit (F/N)." The man hissed in air between his teeth. "You can't go to work like that." His gaze took in the angry marks on your jaw and he rubbed his thumb lightly on the small split in your bottom lip. "Are you in pain?" You turned back to him and his hand stayed on your cheek. 

"I'm ok, my arms and stomach hurt a bit but I'll be fine. I've got stuff that will cover this up." You pointed at your face and saw silver eyes narrow.

"Arms and stomach?" Realising you hadn't actually gone into any detail about your injuries, you explained the twisting, wrenching pain through your limbs and the foot you received to the gut. 

"Show me." It wasn't a request, so slowly you pulled up your vest to reveal the purple mess that lay below. 

"Fuck me, (F/N)." His stare held an intense fury and he whispered when he spoke again. "I'm going to fucking kill him." Placing your top back, you tried to keep him calm, telling him you were ok and it would fade soon and Levi sighed, holding on to his temper.

"Thank you for staying last night." He looked across and flicked you on the forehead. 

"I told you, don't thank me. I'm here because I want to be. Because I have to be. So shut up and go brush your teeth, idiot." Slapping his arm, you nevertheless complied and began to walk carefully and painfully to the bathroom as his voice sounded behind you. "You get ready first, then we can go to mine. I'm not letting you out of my sight." It was probably unnecessary, but sweet all the same.

Once you had showered, you sorted your hair and makeup. Using a thick coverage foundation on your bruises, you made sure to blend it in perfectly - it was the sort of stuff that professionals used to cover actor's tattoos for films or stage shows and you sometimes applied it to your scars. Pulling on underwear and tights, you selected a deep maroon dress from your wardrobe, then you hit a problem. You couldn't do the zip up the back due to your injured arms. It couldn't be helped, yet you hated to admit defeat.

"Levi? I need a hand please." Curiosity all over his face, he stood at the doorway as you turned your back to him. 

"Are you fucking kidding me?" You could hear the smirk in his voice as your patience wore thin. 

"My arms hurt, ok? Please don't make this anymore embarrassing than it already is." Staring straight ahead with a scowl, you felt his fingers grip the zip from the small of your back and he was standing so close to that his warmth radiated off him.

Slowly he pulled it up, making sure he ran his knuckles against your bare skin as he went. Sparks shot through you and your breath became faster as he reached the top, hand stroking your hair aside and you felt breath on your neck. "I never thought I'd be zipping you up. It would be much more pleasurable for both of us if I were pulling it down." His lips almost touched skin as fingers brushed lightly on your nape. Shivering involuntarily at the sensations, you did the only thing you were capable of and leant backwards, words coming out in whispers, eyes closed. 

"Jesus Levi..."

Feeling him move, his next words were in your ear, soft mouth touching you deliciously. "Hmmm? What was that (F/N)? I didn't quite catch you." As your heat rose from below, you could only manage a small squeak in response and suddenly he was gone, walking into the living room. "Right, let's get going." You turned to him with evil in your eyes, sexual frustration at the limit and you received a sly smirk and cheery explanation in response. "Payback for the meeting room." Grumbling, you put your coat and scarf on and made for the exit, grabbing your bag on the way.

Levi's building was much nicer than yours and only a ten minute walk down quiet streets and as you entered the apartment, he told you to make yourself at home whilst he went to shower and get dressed. It was elegant but spartan in here and you expected nothing less; the couch was a large, imposing black leather focal point and you sat down on it to wait. Seeing the ashtray, you lit a cigarette and winced as it touched your healing lip, one which wasn't that bad to look at and should be fine in a few days. That was something you couldn't cover with makeup as you looked ridiculous in lipstick usually. Striding in, Levi swept through the room in another perfect suit and went to make the two of you a hot drink before leaving for work. It was still not even 7am.

You had taken a cab, of course; the thought of the bus nauseated Levi and as you approached the office, you looked over. "What will you do if someone sees us coming in together?" He clicked his tongue. 

"I don't actually give a shit, (F/N). I'm more senior than most of them in there, so they can fuck off if they've got a problem." You didn't care either, but given his position, you'd wondered if he had to keep up appearances. Evidently not, it seemed.

The day kept you busy and you explained your lip away with a story to anyone who noticed. Enjoying a rare moment of peace, you sipped a coffee and stared out the window until any serenity was shattered by a figure rushing over, almost making you spill the drink. Hange stared with wide eyes and looked at you critically. "(F/N), what the fuck?" Seeing your confusion, she confessed. "Short stuff told me briefly what happened, said to keep a watch on you. Are you ok?" Recounting the story, she grew angrier by the minute, ending finally with her slapping your desk. "That fucker. Oh, he's so dead." You shook your head. 

"Don't waste your thoughts on him, Hange. I'm not." She hugged you, not too tightly, obviously aware of the bruise to your stomach and promised to catch up with you later.

That afternoon, you were walking with purpose to deliver some memos, papers and your phone in one hand. You saw Levi standing against the wall further along the hallway, head down, glaring at his tablet. Smirking, you kept your pace and stared straight ahead. Checking quickly around, you returned your gaze forward and as you passed him, your hand shot out and brushed lightly against his pants, fingers tracing softly over his crotch. He yelped slightly and you shot a smirk over your shoulder as you strutted away. His expression was brilliant, shock mixed with excitement. "Payback!" 

As you neared your destination, the item in your hand buzzed and you looked down, opening the message from the man recently touched. "I'll decide your punishment later." Nerves tingling, you smiled widely, barely even feeling the sting on your bottom lip. You knew most people might have wanted to stay in, keep away from men and rest after what had happened last night. Hell, that was a perfectly natural reaction and you were slightly surprised that you hadn't acted that way, but you wouldn't let Jean win. You wouldn't let it affect your life and you refused to let it impact on the happiness you felt nowadays. The times of being hurt and abused were over and you were determined to stay strong.

~~~~~~~

After a few more texts during the day, it had been decided that both of you could do with a de-stress tonight so were going to meet at the bar at 7. You had assured him you would get a cab home and then another to your evening out and that your ex wouldn't be stupid enough to come near you right now; he didn't know you hadn't phoned the police, or that you weren't going to - it would be pointless.

As you got out the taxi, dressed casually for the night, you pushed into the bar and waved over at Eren who was working. Looking over at your usual booth, you frowned as four faces stared up at you, like they had on your birthday, but they were not filled with that joy you'd seen at the weekend. Pulling your coat off, you slid in next to Levi and sighed. "Ok (F/N)," began Annie, darkness clouding her face. "We need to talk." Serious expressions stared at you. Clearly Hange had let them know all about last night.   
"What's the point? He's not worth it."

Ymir spoke lowly. "We need to call the police." Levi waved his hand, dismissing the thought. 

"No fucking way. At best, he'd be slapped with a restraining order that he would no doubt fucking break." Silence descended and you got up to fetch some drinks. As you returned you noticed everyone swiftly stop talking. 

"I'm not fucking blind. What's going on?" Carefully you sat down, wincing slightly and Levi's arm snaked around your waist in comfort and you took a big gulp of wine.

"We can't let him get away with it. He has to pay." Hange's voice was full of hate and you could almost see the cogs turning in her head as she plotted. 

"I'll kill him." Everyone looked up in shock at the totally calm, deadpan way in which the pale man spoke his words, face passive and drink delicately held in his free hand. You nudged him and shook your head. 

"He's kidding guys, calm down." None of you said anything again for a while, all deep in thought. 

"So what are we going to do?" Annie's tone said what everyone had been thinking and you all just sat there, clueless. You weren't exactly master criminals - this was new territory and you placed shaking hands palm down on the table. 

"Let's just leave it for now, yea? Get back to normality and keep our eyes open for him, ok?" Grunts and sighs sounded round your friends as you all sipped at your beverages.

Ymir and Annie had gone back behind the counter eventually and Hange had to get home, saying something about a cat, but she hadn't been very clear. The evening wore on and the remaining two of you spent a serene few hours together, relaxing and enjoying each other's company and touches.

As he walked you home, the snow began to fall. It was beautiful and you grinned at the quiet that it brought to an otherwise noisy city. Everything turned calm, the white substance seeming to absorb all sounds. Sparkling lights from buildings made the flakes twinkle in the air and Levi watched you with a smile as you took so much pleasure from a common weather phenomenon. Not wanting to go inside yet, you grabbed his hand and led him over to a small grassy park in a square near your building. It had a few benches, an ornate pond and trees that had long ago shed their leaves.

"Isn't it lovely?" you exclaimed, staring around at the perfect scene, a child-like awe in your eyes as he moved up behind, wrapping his arms gently around your waist, chin on your shoulder. 

"It's fucking snow, (F/N)." You turned, ready to chide him for ruining the moment but something stopped any discussion. You felt his hold remain as the two of you stood together, clouds of breath mixing in the winter air. He smiled lightly and your gazes were locked together as he raised a hand to your chin, tilting your head up gently.

Your heart seemed to stop in your chest and you felt weightless as Levi's lips touched yours, pressing gently with delicate precision. Sliding your arms in against his body, you pulled him closer, kissing back and sighing. This moment had been inevitable and it was well worth the wait as he began showering you with the softest pecks. Your hands didn't wander as you instinctively knew this was not that kind of moment, it was all about tenderness and you were totally in synch with him, leaving small, delicate kisses one after the other on each other's mouths and you felt your being fill with bright electricity.

Levi's tongue flicked lightly on your bottom lip, any feeling of pain there long forgotten as you allowed him in. It wasn't a battle, there was no fight for dominance, just two people connected in passion, feeling each other's warmth. Tongues slowly stroked together, exploring and delighting in finally doing what had been on the cards for so long. Feeling like you would never be this happy ever again, your soul swelled and you held on to him tightly, fingers tingling with pleasure. Pulling back slightly, the man placed one last, long kiss on your closed lips and broke away.

Eyes stared at one another, still clinging on in the embrace. Breathing in shallow gulps, you couldn't stop the smile that pulled at your pout and you saw his twitch up at the corners also. Lifting his right hand, he ran his thumb over your mouth, touching what he had eventually taken. "So," he whispered. "Finally we lost control." Grinning now, you tightened your grip, lips still almost touching. 

"It's been a long time coming, Levi." His smile widened and he dipped to steal another kiss from you. 

"The things you fucking do to me (F/N)," he said with exasperation. Sharing a final moment, you placed your mouth to his once more, melting into him.

Arms around each other, you made the short trip back to your home and stood outside, snow peppering your hair as you were pulled into Levi once more. He left with a parting peck and you sighed again, letting him know exactly how content you were. "Sleep well (F/N)." He almost purred with desire and tucked a stray hair behind your ear in a show of gentle affection. "I'll see you tomorrow." Unable to move for a minute, you watched him disappear into the white clouds, hand reaching up to touch your lips, trying to still feel him on you.

Sitting back on your couch, a glass in one hand and cigarette in the other, you were smiling even half an hour later. You both knew it would have gone so much further tonight if it hadn't have been for yesterday's events; not that you were dwelling on the incident, you'd meant it when you told your friends that Jean wasn't worth getting upset about. It was more related to the injuries, body in no state to do justice to anything more than a kiss. But fuck, it was the most amazing moment. Thinking back to the park, you were glad that the man you shared yourself with in the snow had appreciated your frailty and had known, as you did, that this was only the beginning.

Bringing you from your thoughts, a knock sounded at the door. Heart racing, you moved silently, peering through the peep hole and frowning. Opening up, you were met by a giant man with a kind face. "Hey Erwin, you ok?" He smiled widely. 

"I'm good, thanks (F/N). Just wanted to see how you were doing? I hope I'm not disturbing you." Shaking your head, you gave him a smile. 

"No, not at all. I'm a bit of a night owl. And I'm fine. Thank you again for what you did for me." He waved your gratitude off. 

"No need to thank me, I did what anyone would have done. If you have any trouble from him again, let me know. I run a gym and there are some rather bulky men that would be happy to help." Blue eyes shot you a knowing look and the guy smiled again as he walked back down the hall.

Bizarre. My own personal protection detail.

~~~~~~

There had been a spring in your step all day and you couldn't stop reaching up to your lips like a little love sick school girl that had never been kissed. Your expert makeup had covered your bruising once more, but Hange had been looking at you funny. Finding a few minutes together, she pulled you into a quiet corner. "Spill." Her eyes bored holes into yours like a drill and you couldn't help but laugh. Hands out in a questioning gesture, you tried to look innocent. "Don't shit a shitter, (F/N). Something's happened. Now spill!" She was almost shaking with anticipation and you weren't able to stop a grin as you shook your head.

"Seriously Hange, its not what you think." Tapping her foot on the floor, she nearly exploded with the need for gossip. 

"Then how come both you and shorty are acting differently today, hmm?" Wow, so he was behaving strangely? This you had to find out about.

"How is he different?" Your friend waved her finger at you. 

"Oh no, (F/N). You tell me first." Sighing, you huddled closer and told her briefly what had happened in the snow last night, woman's eyes widening and she looked like she was going to cry. 

"(F/N), that's…..it's so…..so…..boring!" You weren't surprised, but you were a bit pissed off. 

"Unless you'd forgotten Hange, I'm not exactly in any physical condition to do anything else. Hell, I couldn't even zip my dress up yesterday because my arms hurt." Her expression changed, guilt washing over her face slightly before it was taken over by another sceptical look.

"So who zipped up your dress then?" Shit. You wished you could take your words back and tried to gloss over them. 

"Never mind, what's important is that to me, it was an amazing moment and I'm not going to let your filthy mind ruin it." Crossing your arms, you felt a pull at your muscles and winced slightly as she patted you lightly, nodding. 

"Ok, (F/N). I'm sorry. But seriously, if that's amazing to you then you really need to get a life. How long's it been? Seven, eight months?" Shrugging, you brushed it off. 

"Yea but look what happened last time I went in head first. I ended up with that shit for brains, Jean." Considering your truth, Hange remained silent. "Anyway," you prompted her. "How is he different?" She stayed quiet, trying to put her finger on what it was that she'd noticed. 

"I dunno. Just had a glint in his eyes that I've never seen for as long as I've known short stuff. He's still an asshole, though." You laughed at her grumble, heart skipping a beat at the thought of him feeling the way you did.

~~~~~~

Friday night arrived and you were, of course, in your bar. Waving at the three people working today, you saw a small girl sitting stiffly on one of the stools, blonde hair shining in the light. She was tiny and you wondered why the fuck a kid was in here. Then you saw how her head turned to watch Ymir whenever she moved - it must be Historia. Shit, she's so small, you mused and walked behind the counter, greeting Annie with a hug and grinning at Eren before moving to embrace the last one here. Feeling angry eyes on you, a laugh escaped your lips as you whispered in your friend's ear. "Introduce me then, before she fucking kills me with her stare." Breaking the embrace, Ymir turned and explained to the petite blonde. She still didn't look too pleased when you offered your hand and she took it lightly. 

"Pleasure." A delicate voice reached your ears but her sweetness was certainly not spreading to her face. Trying to diffuse the situation, you put your best sing-song voice on and smiled. 

"So, how did you meet Ymir?" Annie choked on something in the background and you noticed how the two women almost flinched. 

"It's a long story, maybe not for now." Historia's calculated response told you to leave it and you attempted to laugh it off.

"Ok," you said awkwardly as Levi came in through the doors. "I'll leave you guys to it." Scurrying away, you grabbed the usual drinks and made your way to the booth. People seemed to know it was yours now and no one ever really sat there. Sliding in next to him, you squeezed his leg gently. "Hey sexy." You were pretty much gazing up with wide eyes and a smirk played over his top lip. 

"Hey (F/N)," he murmured. "I've missed you." Butterflies overtook your body once more as he leant across and stroked your cheek ever so slightly with his fingers. Neither of you made a move to kiss, that was between you and no one else. Besides, you weren't a fan of watching people all over each other and didn't want to become that couple that nauseated everyone.

A couple of hours passed and you were sitting giggling at some stupid story Levi was telling you about one of the execs and how he had fallen over at last year's Christmas party. "This year's one soon, isn't it?" you said as part of the conversation, not meaning anything by it. Quietly, a voice spoke in your ear. 

"Are you going?" You hadn't thought about it actually. Usually you went for a bit but then became aware of people watching how many drinks you were downing and got self conscious and left. Shrugging, you told him of your misgivings about the whole situation and asked the same question to him. He grunted in displeasure. "I fucking hate it, but I have to go. All part of the shitty job." Mulling it over, you made a decision. 

"I'll come. Might make your evening a bit less painful?" Silver eyes flashed as he turned to you. 

"Oh it will, (F/N)."

Remembering something, you sat up a bit and told him about Erwin's visit yesterday. The pale man didn't look too happy about some guy knocking on your door late at night, but kept quiet; he had come to your aid, after all. "It was quite funny actually, he seemed a bit too eager." You tried to keep it light and Levi sat considering the exchange. 

"It could work?" Looking at him, you realised he was thinking about taking Erwin up on his offer.

So caught up in the conversation, you hadn't noticed a figure approaching until they sat in front of you in the booth. No one spoke and you held your breath as dark looks were exchanged across the round wooden table. The newcomer broke the silence. "So, how are you, Levi?" His voice dripped with hatred as he sat stiffly on the seat opposite. 

"Fuck off, just cut to the chase." Levi's response was no warmer and his eyes flashed with murderous intent. "What do you want, Farlan?"


	9. Fights And Frustration

Nothing happened for a moment, the air cold with hatred and you tried to size up the guy in front of you. Farlan's usually kind features were dark and full of violence, but he was listing to one side slightly. "I know what you did Levi. And I'm going to make you pay." Leaning over the table as he spoke, you smelt alcohol on his breath and in seconds Levi was on his feet, shortly followed by the larger male. They stared each other down and you stood slowly, weighing up the options.

You knew a fight was inevitable, there was no point trying to stop it so you quickly processed the evidence in front of you. Farlan was swaying, clearly drunk and given how you'd seen the pale man send Jean to the floor with one punch, you were sure he had the upper hand here. Regardless of what the altercation was about, you were firmly behind your companion on this, selfishly wanting to protect him. All of this ran through your head in an instant and you pointed. "Both of you. Out the back. Now." No more words were spoken as you placed yourself between them and marched towards the door by the bar. Aware of eyes staring, you glanced to your friends with a look that said it was under control.

Pushing through the exit, you passed the silent dishwashers, shelves stacked with bottles and reached the fire escape. You propped it open with a brick so it wouldn't slam shut and turned to the outside space you were now in - it was a small paved area which housed two large commercial waste bins, surrounded by high fences. A security light shone from the top of the building, illuminating the two men that stood inches apart. Farlan had a snarl on his lips as he raised his fists, but Levi's expression remained calm and unreadable as he just stood there casually, like he was waiting for a bus to turn up. You weren't one of those hysterical women who would scream for men to stop; this was going to happen regardless so you stood leaning against the wall by the door and lit a cigarette, looking like a cold hearted bitch, but inside you were alight with nerves.

Farlan swung for his old friend but his drunken state sent him wide and in a flash, Levi swept his feet from underneath him and the tall man fell back onto the hard floor. You'd thought it might have taken a bit longer actually, maybe a few punches, however it appeared to be over already. The smaller person in front of you was showing a side of him that he rarely revealed, the years of brawling coming back to him as if it had been only yesterday.

Pinning his old friend down, Levi looked at the man, boredom on his face. "I had no choice Farlan and I didn't know who it was." Words came out without emotion, clinical and cool. 

"You did five years ago and said nothing! Call yourself a friend?" The one in control remained unmoved by the outburst as his explanation had already been offered. Realising he wasn't rising to it, the person on the floor spoke again with malice. "How about I get hold of her then," he said, head motioning to you. "Show the little lady what real pain and torture is like? Then you might understand what it means to betray someone."

The image of the angry bruises that littered your body filled Levi's mind, clawed at his heart and made him almost vibrate with rage. He hadn't been able to stop your fucking ex from hurting you, he hadn't been there when you needed him and it was eating away at his soul, second by second. A red haze overcame him, horrible pictures of what this man beneath might do to you and lips curled into a look of disgust as he could think of nothing else but causing pain.

The small but powerful individual snapped, laying punch after punch into Farlan, strong arms causing immense damage with each blow. A figure ran out the door next to you into the yard, red hair flashing by. "Stop, please big bro, stop!" Isabel pleaded with him, almost screaming and Levi stopped and sat up, stare never leaving the now bloodied form on the floor as he spoke. 

"Has he hurt you, Isabel?" Rushing over, she crouched on the wet ground. 

"No, no, nothing like that. He just didn't want me to talk to you I guess, so he took me away."

Grey eyes looked up at the gate in the fence that was used to take the large bins out for collection and without any words being spoken, you walked over and unlocked it with the keypad, swinging the wooden slatted door into the adjoining alley. Picking Farlan up with surprising ease, the short but undoubtedly strong man dragged him to the exit and threw his old acquaintance out onto the stone floor, snow still lying in patches. Isabel ran after her fallen lover and knelt down by the man that took her away from Levi, making a choice in that one movement. "Stay away from me. Stay away from (F/N). I hope you're very happy together." Levi slammed the gate shut on them and whatever friendship they had and you locked up.

Silently making your way back inside, you shut the door and stood in the back room for a while, waiting patiently for words you knew would come. "I know what I did was wrong, but when I found out, I didn't know what to do. How do you tell someone you've known for seven years that you just found out what you'd done to his asshole sibling?" He sighed, raising shoulders slightly. "He didn't even like his brother, the guy used to beat him to get money for fuck sakes." Turning his hands over he clicked his tongue. "Fucking disgusting." He moved to the sink to wash blood from his swollen knuckles and you stood behind, arms around his waist. 

"I'm sorry about Isabel, Levi," you said into his back and he snorted. 

"Yea, so am I." A part of him had hoped she would stay, or at least let him explain but she just ran off, leaving him again.

Once he was clean, you both walked into the bar and you nodded to your friends to let them know whatever had happened was now over. Back at your seats, drinks still on the table, you realised the whole thing had taken less than five minutes. Levi sat with a dark expression on his face and you didn't speak, letting him deal with it in his own way. Sighing again, he emptied his glass and turned to you. "Fuck them." You knew that was his way of trying to forget, trying to wave away any other thoughts he had on the matter and you respected it.

His mood seemed to lighten as the evening went on and you had chatted as normal, exchanging light touches and flirtatious words. You'd brought another bottle over after quickly explaining to Annie what had happened. Historia was still there so you had asked for the message to be passed onto Ymir - there had been enough confrontation today. As you sat back down, you winced at the pain in your stomach. Nothing else hurt anymore, just the place you had been kicked in and silver eyes looked over with concern. "How are you feeling, (F/N)?" You tried to play down how much it hurt, but he knew you better. "Do you want to get home, lie down?" He meant nothing crude with the suggestion, it was purely care. Thinking it over, you agreed as you felt your denims digging in to the bruise. The bottle hadn't been opened, so you picked it up to take it away and went to say goodbye to your friends, also to let them know why you were leaving so early on a Friday.

"Keep an eye on that (F/N)," said Annie. "It might be more than just bruising." Smiling, you nodded slowly.

"Thanks, I'll be fine I'm sure. And you, keep a watch on those two love birds." 

Back in the apartment, you changed into loose pyjamas and looked at your reflection - the cut on your lip was practically gone and the marks you'd covered up this morning were fading. Tidying your hair, you walked through to the living room and curled up against the sofa, head resting back and body pressed into Levi's side. He turned and laid his own head on the cushions, faces almost touching. You placed your hand on his face and leant in to take his pout in a soft kiss, the sensation of sparks shooting through your bodies as he moved in, gathering you up in his arms and reciprocating hungrily. Your hands went up to his locks and you opened your mouth slightly to signal a deeper liaison and he complied instantly, tongue slipping in to find yours.

There was more heat in the action today as you moaned softly and felt yourself being lowered down gently to lie on the couch, lips never breaking. Sliding your palms across his back, you felt fingers brushing lightly at your side, underneath your vest top, sending electricity throughout your entire being. Before he could get carried away and move even higher, Levi broke the kiss, making you groan with frustration.

"(F/N), I don't want to hurt you. You have no idea how much I fucking want you right now, but I won't cause you pain." He was almost panting, his excitement clear as it pressed against you. Kissing him once more, you left his lips buzzing as you pulled back. 

"I know you're right Levi, but I'm having a hard time stopping myself here." The tension between the two of you was thick and you lay together for a while, both sizing up the situation. Sighing, he straightened and pulled you gently upwards, cuddling you into his body. "Shit," you whispered, heart pounding and heat building between your legs. "I can't fucking wait for this damn injury to go away." You moved so you were draped over him, right leg curling over across his, mouths almost touching. "Once it does, I'm going to do unspeakable things to you." He shivered at your words and pulled you into a lust filled embrace, however the position you were in tore at your stomach and you involuntarily yelped in pain.

"Fucking shit!" You growled loudly with complete frustration and Levi smirked. 

"Maybe you need a cold shower, (F/N)?" His words dripped with mischief and you ran your touch slowly up his bulging crotch. 

"I'm not the only one," you whispered, enjoying the revenge. Moaning deeply, he threw his head back and laughed lightly. 

"Jesus fucking christ, do we need to enforce our no hands policy again?" Laughing, you laid against him, cuddling tight.

~~~~~~

The week moved by quickly, full of suggestive texts between the two of you. Any time you saw Levi at work, sly glances were exchanged and quick moments of physical contact enjoyed when you were sure no one was watching. The fact that you were sneaking around made it all the more delicious, stolen touches and looks only adding to your anticipation.

It was Thursday morning and you sat at your desk, prodding yourself in the stomach. It didn't hurt to touch at all, the bruise was almost gone and doing some twists and turns, you were finally satisfied that you were probably ok, no internal damage done. Hange came racing over, a frown on her face as you stuck a finger into your abdomen again. "What the hell? Actually, never mind (F/N). You got your dress for tomorrow?" The dreaded Christmas party was almost here and you'd ordered a few outfits online, keeping the best and returning the others. 

"Yea Hange, you?" She nodded in excitement. 

"Mike's gonna love it. I bet we don't last long at the venue, if you know what I mean?" Wiggling her eyebrows, she shot you a wink. "And you, (F/N). Are you finally going to get yourself some?" Shaking your head, you gave a stern, disapproving look. 

"Can't you just be happy with your own sex life?" 

"No way! Other people's are far more entertaining!" Not realising she had basically just insulted her boyfriend, the woman continued to chatter happily about dresses and makeup, wondering who would get drunk first and what food there would be. A text buzzed through and you picked your phone up as she was mid flow about canapés. From Levi. 

"Are you still going to the shitty party tomorrow?" You responded that you were and pointed out the fact that you were only going for his moral support. "Fuck that (F/N), you're there for me to have something beautiful to look at while I'm on the verge of insanity." Knowing he meant well, you didn't take it to mean that you were just there for eye candy, but he really needed to work on his terminology, you thought as Hange finished talking about food.

"It's going to be great, (F/N). I can't wait!" Almost squealing, she hurried away and you smiled at her enthusiasm.

~~~~~~

Friday evening had finally arrived as you somewhat reluctantly got ready in your apartment. Showered and dried, you worked on your hair, setting it up in a simple but effective arrangement. You picked some nice matching underwear, black and red with small bows and opened the dress bag that hung from the wardrobe. It wasn't your style, but the occasion demanded elegance and you had to make the effort. Sliding it on, you looked over the stunning garment, deep blue in colour, almost black and made out of delicate lace. The capped short sleeves sat nicely on your shoulders, neck low and round to show a hint of cleavage. Well, maybe more than a hint seeing as you were wearing a push-up bra. The dress was fitted down to your hips then flowed out ever so slightly for the rest of it's length to the floor. It was fully lined with black satin so it wasn't see-through and wouldn't ride up your body as you moved. Shifting awkwardly, you found it quite tight to walk in and the only option was a slow strut, one foot in front of the other as you stepped, meaning that your hips would be swinging everywhere you went.

Shoes were simple, black patent heels that shone slightly out from the hem of the gown and you checked your reflection, smoothing down the fabric. Makeup was smokey cat-like eyes, applied with a dark pencil and aided by some shadow that you swept across your lids. You dabbed some almost unnoticeable pink lip balm on, giving your mouth a lovely shine that glistened in the light and intricate long thin silver earrings hung down, a matching necklace sitting on your skin. Thick professional foundation had been applied on your wrists, covering the faint lines and sealed with a powder that came with the product to stop transferring skin coloured gunk onto you or anyone else. Spraying your favourite perfume, you stepped through the mist to get even coverage.

Feeling downright ridiculous, you walked carefully to pack a few items in your black clutch; keys, phone, smokes, lighter. You shoved some bank notes into your cigarette packet to pay for cabs and as an afterthought, added a small compact and the balm for touch ups. Glancing at the time, you saw that your pre-ordered taxi would be here soon and grabbed your smart winter coat, shrugging it on carefully so you didn't catch your earrings on the fabric. Bloody lobes would not be a good look.

You waited downstairs in the warm foyer and walked out as you saw the car pull up. Getting in was tricky as you had to keep your legs pressed together and swing in sideways, a ladylike action that you weren't used to. Checking your phone on the short journey, you saw a message from Hange. "I'm here (F/N) it's lovely! Come find me xx." You let her know you were nearly there and saw another text come through from Levi. "Get a fucking move on, I'm dying here." Smiling, you chose to let him squirm and didn't reply.

As you arrived, (e/c) eyes looked up at the imposing hotel that had been hired for the event. It was red brick and a man in a suit and smart hat waited by the doors to let the partygoers in. You imagined the whole of the ground floor had been sectioned off for the finance company, probably large conference rooms turned into one big space with tables and a dance floor. Sighing at the tiresome ceremony of it all, you paid the driver, tipping well before stepping out into the cold air.

Checking your coat in, you made your way slowly to where you had been directed and another smartly dressed employee of the venue opened the grand doors to allow you in. Chandeliers hung from the ceiling, bathing the scene in a low light. Tables lined three sides of the room with expensive looking place settings and a dance floor and podium sat at the far end. There seemed to be another room and corridors off to one side as you could see people flowing in and out - presumably the bar would be down there along with the toilets. Waiters milled about, handing out small morsels of food from shiny trays and you spotted a large sign to your left - seating plan for the main meal. Looking it over, you saw you were in between Hange and Armin, joined by three other names you recognised but didn't really know from the floor above the one you worked on. Your eyes flicked to the table next to yours and saw that Levi and Mike were on that one, along with two of the exec board.

Hange appeared from nowhere, a beautiful red gown on that was dangerously low cut. Her boyfriend hurried behind her and you could see him watching closely, thinking how she had probably been right that he wouldn't be able to last long with her dressed like that. She stopped about a metre away and looked you up and down. "(F/N), oh my god, you look stunning! Come here!" She gave you a huge hug and whispered in your ear. "Shorty is going to flip when he sees you!" You smiled, hoping she was right; after all, you were only here out of sympathy for him. Breaking apart, you turned to greet Mike. 

"She looks amazing, don't you think?" He grinned, looking at his date and replying with a far away voice. 

"Incredible, yes." The way they gazed at each other made you feel like you were standing in between a moment best left to the couple and stepped back as the man moved in to kiss your friend.

A waiter passed and you took a glass of champagne from the tray he offered and drank deeply. It was dark enough in here that you didn't think anyone would notice. Looking to the back of the room, you saw double doors that led outside and saw people coming in and out. That must be the smoking area, you mused and mumbled to Hange that you were headed that way, not that she heard you. Approaching another server, you deftly swapped your empty glass for a full one and pushed through the exit. A large, ornate courtyard full of smokers greeted you, gratefully noticing the outdoor heaters that sent their red glow over everything. You pulled out a cigarette and lit up, breathing deeply and sipping at your drink to calm yourself, hands trembling lightly. There were so many bodies out here but you didn't see anyone you really knew enough to start up a conversation, so just stood to one side on your own.

Unknown to you, there was in fact someone familiar around and he was staring right at you. Levi was being spoken to by two men that he would share a dinner table with and all three turned as you stepped out into the open space. Watching in silence, silver eyes moved down every inch of your body, from the delicate earrings and slightly pink lips, soft breasts that looked so inviting, your curves leading to the small suggestion of a shoe that peeked out from your gorgeous dress. He thought you looked breathtaking and his thoughts began to turn dirty.

One of the men cleared his throat, cigar in hand. "Well, that is a different look to the woman in the board meeting last week," he said. "Glad to see she's still got her tits out, though." The other man laughed and Levi felt his lips twitch into a grimace full of murderous intent, hating the fact that these filthy old men were undressing you with their stare. The director remained calm, all in the name of business he reminded himself and then he saw you look up - your gazes met and he thought his heart would stop in his chest as your demure eyes looked out from smouldering, dark lids. He angled his head slightly, signalling you to come over.

As you walked with the wiggle that this damned stupid dress demanded, you looked at Levi and how fucking sexy he was in his tuxedo. A lot of men looked like they were wearing someone else's clothes when they wore a tux, but not him - it fit the guy beyond perfection and highlighted every part of his toned body. You saw the way his eyes flashed and shot him a small smirk. Reaching the trio, you hardly noticed the others and you addressed the only important one. "Evening, Mr Ackerman," you purred. "Lovely venue, isn't it?" He felt a familiar stirring as you spoke, words laced with lust and it sounded ridiculously exquisite for you to call him by his last name again. Taking your right hand, he lifted it and placed a small kiss on the back, stare never leaving yours. 

"It is indeed, Ms (L/N). Glad you could come." His statement had not been lost in translation and you felt like melting in front of him there and then. A throat was cleared and the shortest male snapped his head round to glare up at the person to his right. 

"Don't keep her all to yourself, Levi." The bearded man turned to you, his gut sticking out between lower shirt buttons and a red flush already on his cheeks from the champagne. His appearance made your stomach turn, but you smiled sweetly nonetheless. "Ms (L/N), is it?" he asked, holding his hand out. Before he could even try to do the same as Levi had, you gripped tightly and shook his arm up and down strongly. 

"Yes, it's a pleasure to see you again, Sir." You had no idea what his name was, so kept it formal. His expression looked shocked at the strength in your grasp and you had to be careful not to squeeze too hard in case any disgust became clear. The other exec took his turn and again you made sure he couldn't touch you with his spit covered lips. Levi looked on with amusement, knowing your features so well that he could almost feel the disdain radiating from you. 

"Gentlemen, if you'd excuse me, I'm afraid I need to talk shop with Ms (L/N)," he said, taking your elbow gently and moving you away. Cries of protest were heard, along the lines of letting your hair down, it's a party and to bring the female back soon.

You looked up at Levi with gratitude as he led you to the far corner of the courtyard, away from the crowd and unfortunately also the heaters. Shivering slightly, you nodded as he passed you a smoke, lighting it quickly then turning the flame to his own. As you held the cigarette, he could see that your hand was shaking. "Want to go inside after this, get a drink?" You smiled with gratitude, happy that he could read you well. 

"Thanks for getting me away from those two fucks," you whispered. "Did you see that guy's stomach sticking out of his clothes?" You pretended to gag at the thought and he smirked. 

"They love the parties here, get to eye up all the younger women without fear of being fucking shouted at by their wives." Work events were employees only as the company was not willing to pay for freeloading other-halves and he leant in a bit closer, speaking softly. "You look fucking amazing, (F/N). And you smell so good." Small smile in place, you shrugged. 

"I knew you'd like it," you said quietly. "And can I just say Mr Ackerman, you look ten times better in a tux than a suit. I don't know how I'm going to be able to keep my hands off you." Your eyes hungrily gazed over him as you bit your bottom lip and he growled, doing everything within his power to stop from devouring you instantly.

His expression changed to one of impatience as a pained voice mumbled to you. "Oh great, here it fucking comes." In an instant, Hange was by your side, grabbing your free hand and swinging it in a childish gesture. She tried to take Levi's too, but he stepped back, looking at her with evil in his glare. 

"Don't even think about touching me, shitty glasses." She feigned hurt, but couldn't stop the grin on her face.

"(F/N) wears glasses too at work, I bet you don't mind that, do you?" He looked away, boredom across his face. 

"Tch. At least she looks good in them." Hange squealed and gripped you tighter. 

"Aw you guys are just too cute, you know?" Before she could say or do anything more, a loud announcement alerted you all to the fact that it was time for the main dinner and you made your way back inside, extinguishing your cigarette on the stubber and walking carefully through the door. 

"Having trouble in that dress, Ms (L/N)?"

"You have no idea, Levi. It's too fucking tight," you shot back over your shoulder. Feeling the smirk he now had on his face, you waited for the inevitable comment.

"Well, we wouldn't want to keep you in that uncomfortable clothing for too long, would we now?" Excitement building, you felt a tingling sensation as your strut became more confident, swaying to your table with a pronounced movement that was purely for his benefit. As you sat in your designated seat, a waiter filled glasses and you took yours quickly, drinking about half in one go. 

"Steady, (F/N)," whispered Hange. "You don't want to overdo it and not be able for any fun stuff later!" Looking at her with a tired expression, you lowered your eyelids. 

"You know me. It'll take a lot more than some wine to stop me from having fun." Glancing over to the table that was situated nearby, you caught Levi's stare - he'd heard what you said and as you smiled over with a sultry look, he knew exactly what you'd meant.


	10. Inevitability

Dinner was excruciatingly slow and three small courses of what you presumed was supposed to be good food now sat forgotten in your belly. Speeches had been made from the podium, meant to spark fire in the employee's hearts, but the words lay dead in your mind. It was all for the sake of show and you barely managed to hide your boredom as you looked across to Levi, rolling your eyes as the last man finally stopped talking. Applauding with empty emotion, you heard music start to sound out over the speakers, signalling that the true party had begun.

Grabbing your drink, you moved off towards the outside courtyard, well aware that a certain company director was only a few steps behind. As you reached the quiet corner, you watched as bodies filled the area, much needed smoke entering a multitude of lungs. You heard business-like raucous laughter, all of it hollow as the tune pumped out louder. The raven haired man reached you, two cigarettes in hand as he exhaled loudly in relief. "Fuck me, it gets worse every year," he breathed, lighting both of your smokes in his lips and passing you one. "Can we not just go now?" His eyes pleaded, but your evil streak came out. 

"Oh come on Mr Ackerman. You need to stay, sweet talk the execs and all that." Moving closer, you smiled. "It will be worth it in the end." Eyes glinting, he stood in his place but longed to get nearer still.

"Oh really, (F/N)? How so?" Eyelids low, you replied as you stamped out the cigarette under your shoe and began to walk off. 

"Wait and see, Levi."

Around forty five minutes after entering the building again you sat in a chair in the loud main room, leaning against the back as you slowly sipped at your drink. Levi was being talked at and he shot you a look, asking you to please save him. Staying true to your word, you stood and made your way slowly over, hating the restriction of the ridiculous dress. As you approached, the men around him stopped to stare as you came closer, glass in hand and you stood before them, throwing the almost full measure of scotch down your throat, giving them all an eyefull of your neck. Nonchalantly placing the empty vessel on a passing waiter's tray, you watched as they gazed, taking in your still totally sober state. "Excuse us gents, I'm afraid I still have some business talk to attend to with Mr Ackerman." Your voice sounded thick like syrup to their ears as they hung on your every word. Shrugging, you held your hand out to motion Levi towards the corridor that led to the bar and looked at the group of open mouthed men. "You understand, right? Work never sleeps."

As the two of you walked off officially, he whispered to you. "I wish I had you for the last parties (F/N). You're fucking good at this." Spotting a small doorway, you glanced backwards and seeing no one around, you swiftly pushed your companion through. The small closet contained a printer, some shelves full of office supplies and before he could say anything, you pressed your lips onto his. Sighs rang out in the tiny room as you deepened the kiss instantly, shoving him against the wall and running your hands through onyx hair, tongues sliding and twining together with lust. You felt his touch moving up your body, exploring with feverish lust and you moved yourself to meld into him further.

Breathless, you broke apart and Levi gazed into your eyes as you spoke. "Want to get out of here?" He nodded vehemently and groaned as you brushed your hand up against his crotch. Turning, you opened the door carefully - no one was in sight as you grabbed his hand and moved as quickly as your dress would allow, but just as escape was in sight, voices rang out and your grip parted. Rounding the corner and into the bar, men swarmed like insects, equally trying to get the attention of the woman in the lacy gown and the stony yet powerful director. Genuine sorrow pulled inside as you watched him get dragged away and you caught his own desperate expression.

An hour and a half later, you sat in the same chair, at the same table you had eaten dinner at, your face full of annoyance. Most people were on the dance floor, including Hange and Mike, embarrassing moves being pulled. Many of them wouldn't remember much of the night and you sighed, looking down into your glass, swirling the red liquid around. A voice suddenly sounded next to you. "Still want to get out of here?" You stood immediately, grabbing your clutch. 

"Fucking yes, Levi." Trying to walk off with a determined strut, you failed and only managed to create a slightly angry wiggle, much to the amusement of the man following behind you. Pushing through the doors, neither of you cared that anyone might see you leave together and you collected your coats.

The freezing air tried to take the breath from your chest as Levi hailed a cab. Sliding in, he gave the driver your address and the car made its short journey home. The ride was spent in silence and neither of you moved from staring straight ahead; to anyone else, it probably looked like you were a couple who just had a blazing argument, but it was far from the truth. A pale hand shot forwards to pay the fare and you were gallantly helped from the car. Security code entered, your heels clicked across the marble floor and you pressed the button to call a lift, not caring how long it was taking and still neither of you spoke or even touched.

Now in the apartment, you removed your coat and hung it on the hook along with Levi's. Slipping off shoes, you took the annoying earrings out and placed them down on top of a small table, adding the pins from your hair to the tiny pile of items and you started to feel like yourself again. You turned and looked across to the other person here, eyes taking in his well tailored tuxedo - finally you were alone and nothing nor no one would be interrupting you now.

Slowly he walked over, arms wrapping around your waist and he lifted a hand to stroke your cheek with a slight smile. "So fucking beautiful." He muttered calmly, in no hurry as there wasn't the urgency from before, the animal hunger wasn't gnawing at you both as you knew that you had all the time in the world. Levi leant in to place delicate, sweet kisses on your lips, so soft that they almost weren't there and it sent you insane. Moving down your jaw, he left a trail of the same ghostly pecks on your neck and you moaned his name quietly, fingers gripping onto his dark jacket. Shocks ran through your body as he bit ever so lightly down on your collar bone and moved his hands to the top of your spine.

The man brought his head up, your eyes locked as he undid the zip of your dress and the dark fabric fell to the floor, leaving you standing in only your underwear. "Much better than when I'm zipping it up, hmm?" All you could manage in response was a small whimpering noise and he smirked, angling down to look in appreciation at your exposed body, shaking his head and murmuring to himself. "Fuck." Now it was your turn to show a smug smile and you pushed the jacket from his shoulders before undoing the buttons of his shirt slowly. As your steady hands worked down, lips brushed against his, not kissing but trailing your open mouth across soft skin. Levi groaned and finally you placed a kiss on him just as he thought he was going to go crazy.

You ran your hands all over his toned body, fingers searching across the muscular form that stood before you. Sliding down, you kissed his chest, pressing your pout passionately all over his newly exposed skin and raking your fingers up and down his back. Hearing his breath come out in a shake, you straightened up, biting your lip as you continued to stare at his abdomen. Tearing your gaze away, you looked up to silver eyes as you trailed your palms gently down his stomach to where his belt was. The raven haired male shivered as you brushed lightly over his skin, so delicate that it almost tickled. Staying steady, you undid the metal buckle and button that lay underneath, sending the remainder of his tux to the floor.

He stepped out of the pile of clothing and grabbed hold of you, noses touching as he walked forward, forcing you to take small steps backward towards the bedroom. You smiled at each other as you felt the fabric of your bed against the back of your legs and nearly fell over. Holding tight, Levi leant in and whispered in your ear. "So here we are, (F/N)." His breath made you hot with anticipation and you groaned one word loudly as he licked lightly up your lobe. 

"Fuck..." Eyebrow raised with mischief, he looked at you with half lidded eyes and purred the response. 

"If you insist."

In seconds you were on the mattress, a tangle of limbs as your tongues met once more. You felt him unclasp your bra and you shook it off, throwing the garment across the room impatiently as an exploring hand slid down your body, fingers dancing across your left breast, lightly pinching your nipple. Gasping into the kiss, you twitched uncontrollably and you felt the familiar lust growing inside, soul begging to be taken. His palm reached your remaining clothing and he moved softly across the slightly damp fabric. Levi's lips smirked against yours as he felt just how ready you were for him, weeks of foreplay leading up to this heated moment, his own nerves frayed as he pulled harshly at your panties and you lifted your legs to allow him to undress you completely.

Mouths still connected, you felt one slightly shaking finger run up your wetness deliciously and moved your hips up into his touch. Feverishly you slid your hand under the band of tight boxer shorts and grabbed a handful of his ass, gripping tightly and he groaned as you moved round over his hip, still beneath the fabric and stroking up his impressive length. Losing any control he still had, Levi tugged off his underwear, kicking it away and moving on top of you. Breaking the kiss, he stared down with flashing grey eyes, panting slightly as you could see the need in his gaze and you shifted your right leg slightly, meaning that his tip was now pressing into you. A slight movement and he was filling you slowly, reaching further and further until he was completely inside.

With a small gasp, he whispered your name and pulled back, almost totally out and then thrust strongly back in again fully, sending you into a frenzy of pleasure and satisfaction. You gripped tightly to the muscular man and began to move upwards in time with his increasing pace, voice calling out as his lips teased at your neck once more. "Shit, Levi…Levi." Hearing his name spill loudly from your mouth caused him to snarl and push even harder into you with uncontrollable lust. Angling himself perfectly, he rubbed amazingly with every movement and reached up with his right hand to pinch and knead your breast. It sent your mind spinning and you ground your hips fervently with excitement, fast speed maintained as you realised this was right, destined almost and so euphoric. 

All the flirtatious, smutty moments that you'd shared up until now made you both alight with pleasure and need as your bodies slammed together, already nearing your peaks. Nails digging into his shoulders, you threw your head back, words tumbling as an intense heat built strongly from inside. "Fuck, Levi, yes…oh god yes…" It had only been a few minutes, two people wholly caught up in the act and you felt the pounds become erratic, shouting out his name as electricity ran through your whole body, hitting you in waves. Tightening around his length, you'd never felt anything like it, a blinding feeling of pure enlightenment as Levi panted at your neck, trying to hold on so you could ride out your ecstasy for longer but he lost all sense of control, chanting your name over and over against your skin, his own release unbelievably strong as he drove deeply inside. Pushing up on his hands, the man tilted his head back and growled lowly as he filled you with his orgasm, shudders running through his being.

Pace slowing, he lowered back down, placing his cheek against yours, whispering in your ear as you held him tightly. "Jesus fucking christ, (F/N)...shit..." His voice was trembling as he gave one final moaning thrust and you lay together gasping for breath, covered in sweat and each other's fluids. 

"My god, Levi. I….I can't fucking even….." Words escaped you, unable to explain how he had just made you feel. He moved, lying sideways and propping his elbow on the pillow, head in his hand. Gazing at you with a slight smirk, he watched you panting as you turned to him, fingers touching his body. 

"Worth the wait?" The query came with the knowledge that he was well aware you were still shaking from the encounter and you slid your hand to curl over his waist and pulled yourself closer. 

"What the fuck do you think, Levi?"

Leaning down, he took your lips in a soft kiss and pulled back to look at your body. "What do I think, (F/N)?" Steely eyes took in your naked form, reeling and satisfied. "I just can't believe I kept my self control for so long. And now that it's gone, I'm not going to hold back ever again." He gestured to you. "How could I, with a body like that lying next to me?" You smiled and squeezed his ass playfully.

"Levi, this body is all yours, anytime." Something fought it's way through and you blushed, overcome by a sense of requirement. "And by the way, I'm on the pill." A wide eyed response was given, heat of the moment having eclipsed all else and Levi huffed a tiny laugh. 

"Thank fuck for that." 

~~~~~~

Your body had been his a few more times that night, the awakened spark between you begging to be fuelled and you had finally gone to sleep around 4am, usually when you'd be getting up. When you eventually did wake, you were met by a pair of steely eyes staring at you intently. "Fuck! How long have you been watching me, Levi?" He smirked and pushed some hair out of your face. 

"Not long, (F/N). But I am rather enjoying the view." You smiled and ran your hand up his arm. 

"View's not too bad from here either." Noticing the light, you looked over to see what time it was. Shit, midday already. Not that you had anything to do today, but it felt wrong being in bed so late. "Make you some breakfast?" 

"Please, (F/N). That food last night was fucking disgraceful."

After what was probably really lunch, Levi had run home to get showered and changed, having to do the walk of shame in last night's tux. You wondered if he had attracted any glances or comments and stood smirking at the thought as you buzzed him in downstairs. A noise made you look round and Erwin appeared in the hall, full gym gear on. Waving, he approached and looked at you with a smile. "Good night?" Even though you had showered and dressed, you imagined your face still showed the signs of a late one and a hint of over drinking. Shrugging, you replied. 

"Work Christmas party. Always messy." He laughed and you heard grumbling from the direction of the lifts. 

"Fucking idiots, piss off." Levi rounded the corner with a scowl, which only deepened as he saw the huge man talking with you.

"Levi, you remember Erwin?" The large man stuck his hand out at your words and Levi took it, shaking once and nodding his thanks again. 

"Look after this one," said Erwin with a wink, pointing at you. Boredom on his features, your lover just turned and walked inside. Holding hands up in explanation, you shot your neighbour an apologetic look. 

"Don't take it personally, that's just his face." A sound rang out clearly from the apartment. 

"Tch." Chuckling, the huge male leant in. 

"That offer still stands, (F/N). People like that other guy downstairs make me sick. I'd gladly make sure he never bothers anyone again." His seriousness and repeated offer made you realise that he would actually enjoy teaching Jean whatever lesson he was planning and the thought of accepting was at the forefront of your mind. 

"Thank you, Erwin. I might just take you up on that." He nodded and smiled once more. 

"You know where I am."

As he left, you closed your door and saw Levi staring at you. "Are you going to do it?" Considering his words, you shrugged. 

"Probably. Fuck it." Nodding, he approached and hugged you tightly. 

"That fucking dick deserves it (F/N)." You breathed in his clean scent deeply and were reminded of his muttering earlier. 

"Who pissed you off out there just now?" 

"Some little shits thought it was funny that I was carrying this." Looking down to the floor, you saw what could only be described as a rather feminine man-bag. Stifling your own laughs, you glanced at him with raised brows as he grumbled his reply. "What? It was the first fucking one I found. I thought I'd bring some stuff round so I don't have to keep going backwards and forwards all damn weekend."

Your eyebrows got even higher as you curled one side of your mouth up into a questioning smile. "Of course you can stay for the weekend, Levi. Make yourself at home, why don't you?" He noted the humour in your words and spoke in low tones. 

"Oh I will." Silver eyes gleaming, he brought his lips to yours and instigated a steamy kiss. Squealing like a teenager, you grabbed his hand and ran through to the bedroom, ready to rip his only recently obtained clothes off.

The remainder of the day was mostly spent between chatting on the sofa and having mind blowing sex. You were certainly making up for lost time, almost incapable of keeping your hands off each other. Lying back on the bed trying to catch your breath, a huge grin on your face, you looked over to see Levi in a similar state as he leant back with his hands behind his head, breathing quickly. "Well, I don't think I've ever done that before, (F/N)." You laughed loudly. 

"No, me neither." He thought about it for a minute before replying.

"We are definitely doing it again though." Nodding at his words, you replied emphatically. 

"Fucking right." Bodies buzzing, he turned to you.

"Want to go the bar?" You hadn't been for a while and agreed with the suggestion. As he got up to try and find where his clothes were this time, he griped. "Good. I need a fucking rest. You've got some energy (F/N), I'll give you that." Giggling, you gathered your own underwear and selected something to wear that were more respectable than the slouchy items you'd been sporting all day when not naked. Back in the living room, you picked up your phone to see a message from Hange. 

"I feel like shit. You coming out?" Smiling, you tapped back that you were just waiting for Levi to get dressed and would be there soon. Knowing full well what the repercussions would be, you hit send and almost instantly one word came back. "Spill."

When the pair of you arrived not long after, Hange was standing by the counter with Mike, rubbing her head and sipping delicately at a beer. Annie had a smile on her face and was listening to whatever tale of woe the older woman was telling her as Eren balanced dangerously on a chair, hanging some Christmas decorations up and Ymir looked over and waved. Reaching them, you smiled and greeted everyone, laughing at the state of the eldest female as she spoke. "Nothing like alcohol to soothe a hangover, right (F/N)?" 

After you had grabbed a bottle, the four of you went to sit at the booth, Levi looking a bit pissed off at the additional people in there with you, but slid in closely nonetheless. Mike didn't even flinch and you presumed Hange had told him all about your kiss, probably adding in her own bits to make the story more interesting and you aimed your words across the table. "So, Mike. How drunk was she last night?" Your friend groaned and slid her head across the booth to rest on your shoulder as he shrugged. 

"I have no idea, (F/N). Seriously. I can't remember much at all." Shaking his head, he looked downright wretched as he sipped at wine. "What about you?" Smiling lightly, you dismissed his question easily. 

"Wouldn't be much of a bar owner if I couldn't handle my drink," you said, not willing to be getting any deeper than that with someone you barely knew.

Something happened between the other couple; you didn't know exactly what, but after a series of strange movements, Mike stood up and asked Levi if he'd like a cigarette as he needed to talk about something work related. It was as fake as your business talks last night, however you let it happen without question. The men made their way out and Hange stared at you intensely. "He meant it when he said he can't remember. Neither can I. I woke up with his tie wrapped round my ankle and I have no idea what we did." She smiled with a dangerous look. "Must have been good though, I could barely walk earlier." Eyebrows told you exactly what she meant, and then the inevitable came. "Right (F/N), I told you mine, now tell me yours. I could see how hard it was for you guys to keep your hands off each other last night."

"Let's just say that my dry spell is now officially over. And in spectacular style." You couldn't help it, she brought the filthy mind out in you, it was infectious. Clasping her hands together, she grinned, whole face lit up. 

"I knew it. I knew it!" She practically screamed, over excited and full of life. "Been a long time coming, (F/N). Pun intended." Laughing heartily, you nodded. 

"Fuck yes, Hange. But it was worth it. Worth it each and every single time." Her eyes widened. 

"How many?" Shaking your head, you waved a finger as if scolding a child. 

"That's for me to know and you to think about." You knew damn well she would be thinking about it and already was - her eyes had clouded over as the insane need to think about other people's sex lives had taken hold.

The guys returned, looking over at the grin on your face, the screwed up expression on Hange's and Levi pointed at her. "What the fuck is that all about?" he said with disdain. Hard laughter spilled from your lips. 

"She's trying to count." Your body shook with giggles and the other woman looked over and joined in, sharing the secret joke. Tears sprung from your eyes as you struggled to breathe and a low mumble came from above. 

"Fucking weirdo. I'm going for drinks." He stalked off, leaving you and Hange still in fits of chuckles with a confused Mike.

The second bottle of wine was on the go and your hands stopped shaking finally. It was always worse after a heavy night of drinking and you noticed for the first time that Levi's own tremble was visible. He must have had a shit load too, you thought but neither of you were out of it - that wasn't a night either of you had wanted to forget in a haze of alcohol.

Hearing a bang, you looked over to see Eren being caught by Ymir as he finally succumbed to gravity and fell off the chair, tinsel wrapped around him as he was held bridal style by the woman. That started you laughing again and the reason for your last bout came flooding back. Sticking your head against Levi's arm you tried to calm down, letting out the odd snort or chuckle. He looked down with an expression that was both questioning and disgusted and you just shook your head. "Once I start, I can't stop. Sorry!" He whispered in your ear suddenly, words sending chills through you and stopping your hilarity. 

"I'm gratefully aware of that fact, (F/N)." Blushing, you sat up and tried to compose yourself, only to see his smug smirk and flashing eyes looking over. That sent you into an internal frenzy of lust once more and you gulped down your drink to steady yourself.

Unaware of what the hell just happened, Hange started to talk, pointing at the half finished decorations. "What are you guys doing for Christmas?" You and Levi just sat there, acutely aware of how depressing the thought was. He would have spent it drunkenly with Farlan and Isabel and you would have been at the home with your father. Neither of those things were possible this year but you hadn't even thought about it before now. Almost in unison, you both took a sip of red liquid and Hange instantly regretted her question. "(F/N), I'm so sorry, I didn't think. Levi, I'm sorry for whatever memory I just brought up for you too." He glared at her, maybe with a bit less venom than usual, but gave her his standard response. 

"Fuck off." She smiled, having known him long enough to see that there wasn't any malice behind his words this time.

"We should do something though? Maybe in the evening?" Hange was in full planning mode, brain ticking over with some no doubt strange thoughts. Before they could manifest into anything solid, you spoke up. 

"Everyone can come to mine in the evening, I'm more than happy to play hostess?" She considered your offer and seemed to accept, but with her typical amendments. 

"That'll be lovely, I'll make some food, don't want you cooking all day. Ooh and I'll bring Twister!" Levi gave you a look of death as she carried on chatting with excitement. 

"What have you done, (F/N)?" he growled. Smiling sweetly, you shrugged. 

"All in the spirit of the festive season."

Annie rushed over, her face serious. "(F/N), I just found this, it came under the back door." She held up a small envelope. Back door? The back door that was surrounded by high fences and locked by a security code? Your blood ran cold as you took it and the blonde slid in to sit next to Levi. Ymir appeared right behind and everyone shuffled up to let her take a seat. Hands shaking for a different reason, you opened it and took out the folded paper that was contained within. Heart sinking, you read the short note and bowed your head down, laying it on your arms on the table in total defeat. The handwriting was instantly recognisable.

Levi took it from you and anger flashed over his face, eyes burning with rage. "Fucking little dickless shit," he spat as the note was thrown on the table like it had been dipped in poison. The others looked at it and you heard Hange gasp as you lifted your head. Your man pulled you closely into a protective hug, rubbing your arm as he spoke. "I think we need to speak to Erwin." Looking down, you read the words again.

"I will fucking kill you (F/N). There won't always be someone to save you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally...and it won't stop, either.


	11. Old Habits

Snow began to float down outside once more and you gazed at the large flakes falling silently, trying to lift your wretched spirits - it didn't work, so instead you drained your glass, Levi refilling it almost instantly. The fragility of two people with alcohol addictions being a couple was something that had crossed your mind briefly before, but right now you didn't give a shit. As far as you were concerned, he could be an enabler all he wanted.

Your friends all looked confused and you let the man by your side explain who Erwin was as you were in no mood to talk. As he finished, Hange pointed over at him. "Why don't you do it, Levi? I've seen those muscles." Mike seemed hurt, but she brushed his look away. "At the gym, babe, at the gym." You knew full well that he could take Jean out too, but it wasn't just that. 

"The further away from (F/N) the better," he mumbled. "This way it isn't easily connected to her." Silence descended and then Annie spoke up, voicing what everyone had been thinking. 

"But if Jean doesn't know its a warning to stay away from her, then what good will it do?" Again, frowns surrounded the table and eventually you added your thoughts. 

"I know that Levi is more than capable of ripping that sack of shit to pieces." A few surprised looks sprung up, wordlessly questioning his size. 

"Alright, I'm fucking short. Move the fuck on." A few muttered apologies sounded and you continued. 

"But I'm not going to let anyone I love get involved or hurt, him or any of you. I'm going to take the kind if somewhat scary offer of a stranger." No one said a thing, didn't dare breathe and gradually you realised what you'd uttered in front of them all, however remained calm on the outside whilst Hange decided to deflect attention. 

"What if Jean gets more pissed off and comes after you again, (F/N)?" Levi nodded slowly, his biggest fear in all of this suddenly out there. You simply shrugged before replying. 

"Risk I have to take."

The whole conversation was all a bit bizarre and you felt like a gang sitting around plotting. Nothing was further from the truth, you'd never done anything illegal before but this situation was getting urgent. Course of action decided, Annie and Ymir moved to get back to work but the dark haired male stayed pressed against you despite extra space now available in the booth. He linked his fingers into yours and grabbed tightly, looking straight ahead but conveying so much in one touch.

You'd left not long after, making your way home together to see Erwin. "Don't ask many questions, (F/N). Best if you don't know the details." Levi was right and your heart pounded as you knocked on the gym owner's apartment door, holding your breath. His friendly face greeted you both, but turned serious when he saw your expressions. 

"Does that offer still stand, Erwin?" Inviting you in, he closed the door tightly and nodded. 

"What happened?" A pale hand passed him the note and nodding again, he handed it back. "Burn it. I'll make calls. Consider it done." Suddenly the man in front of you changed from gentle giant to cold and calculated. You were worried.

The towering blonde turned to get his phone and your eyes scanned the apartment. Trophies and sporting certificates lined the walls, along with medals and commendations, the one nearest telling everything you needed to know; he'd been a marine. That explained a few things and you relaxed slightly as his voice sounded out across the room, speaking into the handset. "Reiner. That thing? It's on. Yea." He laughed heartily. "Of course, of course. See you later." 

Ending the short and uneventful call, he turned to you, friendly demeanour back in place like a push of a button. "Don't worry guys, honestly. We'll have a bit of fun with that piece of shit. I just need his name." You told him and he grinned. "Thank you, (F/N)." Blue eyes noticed the way that silver shards looked at him and he smiled warmly. "It's ok. We're not some sort of group of thugs. We're ex military and we've seen some things. But the one that always stuck with us was when we caught an enemy combatant raping one of our female comrades. He'd beaten her badly and we took care of him. Slowly. That's what shits like that deserve. So, yes, this will be fun for us admittedly, but he's only getting what he deserves."

Slightly shocked, you nodded. "Thank you, Erwin. I owe you one." 

"No, no. You don't. Think of it as us just doing our jobs. The police don't, so we do." Goodbyes and thanks were exchanged as you walked back to your door and hanging your coats up, Levi asked an important question. 

"What the fuck was that all about?" You gave a small huff of laughter and strode to the kitchen for drinks. 

"Who knew we had a vigilante in the building?" You understood though. Wouldn't do it yourself, but understood.

Sitting on the couch, you sighed and cuddled into your man as he rubbed your arm gently. "Don't think about it. It's done." Unspoken words passed between you as if he was reading your mind, your thoughts scanning back to earlier in the night. "I know (F/N). Me too." Sultry grey eyes flashed and you had no idea how he knew that you'd been thinking about the moment when you basically confessed your love out loud to the whole group, but without saying it himself he'd pretty much confessed the same to you too.

~~~~~~

Sitting at work, you rubbed delicate bracelets against your wrist, not realising they were biting into your skin. A wide eyed expression sat on your features and you stared vacantly out of the window at the wintry scene below. You hadn't heard from Erwin yet. He didn't have your number, granted, but he knew where you lived and it was already Tuesday - maybe it was still too soon? Hange approached and looked on you with concern, grabbing your hand and taking the seat in front. "Stop it, you're going to make yourself bleed (F/N)." Glancing down, you noticed red angry marks for the first time. 

"Shit, Hange. I'm just so stressed, I…" You banged your hand on the desk in frustration and the brunette shushed in a soothing manner, trying to calm you. 

"(F/N), listen. Don't focus on that. Focus on the good stuff." Nodding, you knew she was right, however it was easier said than done. "And," she continued with a softer look. "Lets talk about what you said on Saturday night." Oh no, not that. "So, we were all there. We all heard. You're just too cute." Expertly moving your attention away from the other situation, she smiled as you shook your head slowly. 

"It just came out, Hange. It's true, but what the fuck? Surely I should just have said it to him and not everybody?" Levi hadn't seemed to mind though, so perhaps it was ok it happened like that. Shrugging it off, you looked up at your friend's grin and growled a warning. "Stop it."

It was your turn to change the subject and asked her if she was still up for Christmas at yours. It was only next week and you thought how you'd actually better get some decorations this year if people were going to be coming round. Your friend was still just as excited at the prospect and eventually she managed to calm down enough to tell you yes, she was coming.

Hands grabbed your shoulders suddenly from behind and a thick, slimy voice sounded at your ear. "Sorry I didn't get to talk to you much at the party. You looked amazing though. Fancy wearing that dress for me again in private?" Oluo. Hange looked livid and you rolled your eyes, but before you could turn to punch him in the face, he was gone. With a cry, the man was thrown against the wall behind your desk, pinned in place by a furious Levi. A few heads had popped up across the office to see what was going on as they saw the director standing with his face inches from his subordinate's. In a low hiss that only those at your desk could hear, he spoke. "Don't fucking lay a finger on her again you little shit or I'll break your fucking legs. She's mine. Understand?"

Levi marched away without looking at anyone, sweeping down the hall leaving the three of you in stunned silence. Those who'd been watching had sat back down, show was over and Oluo stared after his boss, then looked at you with his mouth open, searching for answers. You just shrugged and turned back to Hange as if nothing had happened. He awkwardly ran off to sulk and hide in embarrassment, fully aware that people had seen the whole exchange.

Your friend stared at the hallway which her manager had disappeared down and looked to you with shock. Clearing your throat with a smile, you tilted your head, pointing. "So, that just happened didn't it?" She nodded slowly, gaze wide. "Ok, good. I thought I was dreaming or something." His words could have been taken to be possessive, seeing you as an object almost, but that's not what he meant and you knew it.

As he strode angrily to his private office, Levi's head spun with thoughts. Shit, did I say that out loud? Hopefully that fuck Oluo would have the common sense to keep it to himself out of fear for the backlash that would hit him if he opened his mouth. But why? He had always been a private person, not wanting to allow anyone in, let alone these drones at work so it was probably habit, yet he wasn't ashamed of what he'd said, of being with you. By the time he reached his destination, the man couldn't care less about what may or may not be discussed by the water coolers. He looked at his phone that sat on the desk, light blinking to alert him. It was a text from you. 'Thank you.' Shaking his head, he clicked his tongue and sent a quick reply. 

'Told you, you don't need to thank me. Now do some fucking work.'

At your desk, you smiled down at his message and stuck your phone in your bag. Hange had gone to another boring meeting and you turned back to your work, screens full of numbers and data in a variety of colourful graphs.

~~~~~~

By Thursday you were a woman on the edge. Still nothing from Erwin. Sitting in the bar, you threw back another scotch and looked around nervously, scanning for any sign of him, or worse, Jean. Annie came over, voice calm. "You'll hear from him once it's done (F/N), don't worry. Just think about next week, we're going to have fun, yea?" Smiling, you nodded slowly at your friend, grateful for her words even if they did nothing to calm your frayed nerves. The door opened and Levi strode in, looking right at you - he could tell by your face and the empty whiskey glass at your side that you'd heard nothing from the large gym owner.

Silver flashes looked over with concern; you were scratching at your arm and (e/c) eyes darted quickly around. That wasn't what worried him the most, though; you looked like you did in the days leading up to your father's death, face withdrawn and orbs red, lined with heavy lids. The worst part of all was how your head nodded forwards and backwards slightly in a steady rhythm. You were completely drunk. He'd not seen you in this state before and didn't like how your gaze seemed so unfocused as you perched carefully on top of the stool. Levi noted that you were still in your work clothes, so you must have come straight here after leaving the office. It was nearing half past seven now, so he guessed you'd only been drinking for two hours maximum and it must have been nearly the whole bottle of scotch that you'd downed.

Annie leant over to whisper to him, unnoticed by you and he nodded gravely, wrapping his arm around your waist. In defeat, you dropped your head hard against his collar bone and he placed a kiss on (h/c) hair, whispering to you. "Don't do this (F/N). Don't lose yourself." Feeling a bit sick, you took a deep breath and mumbled into his sweet smelling neck, a mixture of scents like tea and his favourite cologne reaching your senses. 

"Levi can you take me home please?" With ease, he lifted you down off the high seat with one arm and put your coat on for you. Grabbing your bag, he nodded over to the blonde woman working tonight who shot him a sympathetic smile as he led you slowly outside.

Walking home, you used him as a support to keep upright, the cold air helping to clear your fuzzy brain only slightly. Shapes danced in front of you with dizzying movements and each step you took felt like you were moving three metres at a time. Unable to control yourself properly, your head rolled on your shoulders in time with your small strides, adding to the confusing and nauseating sensations already pulling at you. Once in the apartment, you somehow managed to get into your pyjamas without falling over and stumbled in to the living room, bashing into furniture. Slumping down on the couch, you pressed into Levi and saw that there was a bottle and one full glass on the table. That was fine, it didn't bother you. You'd probably be sick if you had anymore but it didn't mean he couldn't drink.

He pulled you close with his arm and you both sat staring at the evening news on the TV, not paying any attention in the slightest. Narrowing your gaze, you tried to focus on the small clock in the corner of the screen but there were about three sets of numbers swimming in front of you. Trying a different tact you closed one eye, but that just resulted in your stomach yelling at you, threatening to contract and cause you to vomit. "What's the time?" 

"Nearly eight." Groaning, you squeezed your lids shut and slurred at him. 

"I'm so sorry, Levi." He clicked his tongue. 

"No need to apologise, (F/N). You've helped me at my worst and now it's my turn to help you." Remembering the state of him on the night he found out his friends had gone, you thought about how it didn't make you think any less of him and hoped he wouldn't think any less of you, either.

Time went on and you felt your eyes dropping, the warmth from Levi's body soothing you along with the steady sound of his heart beat. You weren't quite asleep, but the first threads of a random dream had started to invade your mind, shapes and pictures floating through when a loud banging sounded at the door. Pulled from your snooze violently, you screeched his name and held on tightly. "It's just the door (F/N), don't worry. I'll go." Kissing you on the head, he got up to see who it was and you slid down on the couch, the prop of his body now absent. A booming voice sounded from the open entrance cheerfully calling Levi's name and you felt like your brain had been invaded. Whispered words were exchanged as you imagined your lover explaining about your delicate state, then Erwin appeared fuzzily in front of you, sitting on one of the large chairs that matched the couch. 

"One of those days, (F/N)?" he asked quietly with a smile. All you could manage was a groan as your lover sat back down and you crawled across to him, dropping your head sideways on his lap, not caring that you had company. Smiling wider still, your hired help spoke softly. "I wanted to let you know we tracked down your friend. And he has, shall we say, been taken care of." You tried to sit up but had to be helped by pale hands, room spinning at the sudden movement. 

"What happened?" Not sure if your words were even in English, you looked over with the same bobbing head action that you had earlier. 

"All you need to know is he won't be able to walk let alone bother you again for quite some time. And even then, I highly doubt he'll come anywhere near you or your friends." You kind of wanted to know what they'd done, but at the same time, ignorance was bliss. Your stomach was skipping in a hideous churn already, but his next words finished you off. "And it can be quite hard to punch women when you're missing some fingers."

With that, you slid off the sofa and struggled to get up, stumbling in a kind of four-limbed scurry through to the bathroom to eject a belly full of scotch. Levi turned to Erwin and shrugged, the large man just laughing as he was spoken to. "Thank you, Erwin. Honestly." The two men shared a moment of silence as they heard the toilet flush and you staggered back in. 

"Sorry about that," you mumbled. "And thank you. I don't know how to repay you." He held his huge palms up in front of him. 

"No need. Truthfully, it was my pleasure. Now, I think I'd better go and let you get some sleep, so I'll be seeing you later. And again, please think nothing of it." He was incredibly eloquent and well spoken as always, a contrast to the content of this conversation.

You made your way back to the couch as Erwin let himself out and tried to curl yourself into a small ball to get warm as shivers took over your body. Levi threw the fluffy blanket down from the back of the sofa onto you and tucked it around your form, pulling you close to him. The shaking that coursed through you was purely an effect of alcohol and had nothing to do with any remorse about the situation with Jean - you were admittedly a bit shocked at how far they had gone, but in reality you didn't give a shit as not seeing it happen made the revelation seem fabricated almost. "(F/N), you ok?" Looking up into gentle grey, you nodded with bleary eyes and a strong arm squeezed you tightly. "I think you need to sleep." You made no protest, fully aware that you really needed to try and sober up and get some rest. Your man helped you to bed and gave a light kiss to your clammy forehead and within seconds you were fast asleep as he went back to the living room and his wine.

~~~~~~

This must be what it feels like to die, you thought as your head exploded with pain and your stomach threatened to clench into vomiting fits again. You'd never had a hangover like it that you could ever remember and you hated yourself for being so goddamn stupid last night. Sitting up, it felt like splinters were pushing into your eyes and you heard a voice next to you. "No way, (F/N). You are not going into fucking work looking like that." You mumbled something about reports and Levi placed a hand on your arm, feeling how warm it was with the almost fever like state you were in. It wasn't withdrawal as such, there was still a probably quite high percentage of alcohol in your bloodstream; it was more like your body trying to deal with what you'd recently put it through causing nausea, shivers and aches. This had happened all too many times to you both in the past, but you never learned.

The pale man knew what you were going through, having been there himself on numerous occasions and he was well aware that you wouldn't be able to do anything coherent in this state. "Take a long weekend. If there's any shit to deal with, I'll call. No arguments." Groaning, you agreed and felt him get up and leave the room. He was back shortly, holding a large bottle of water and a packet of painkillers. You took the tablets but your hands shook violently as you tried to get in to them and Levi stepped in to assist. 

"Fuck Levi, I'm just....I can't....shitting hell." He passed you the medicine in silence and handed over the water. After they'd been drunk down, he pulled you into a hug.

"I know (F/N)," he said, rubbing your back in circles. "It's what we do to ourselves, a self destruct button that gets pressed once in a while." He leant back and looked into your bloodshot eyes, stroking you hair down from where it stuck out a bit at the side, a smirk on his lips. "So don't worry, I'm in no fucking position to pass judgement. And anyway, you do look kind of sweet when you're hungover." You didn't have the energy to retaliate, so just sulked instead. Standing once more, he gathered up his keys and phone, looking over with sympathy. "Listen, I've got to go but I'll see you tonight, yea? Not in the fucking bar before you say anything." Pouting, you held your arms out like a little child.

Levi rolled his eyes with a small smile and made his way back over. Giving you another tight embrace, a low voice muttered quietly. "Don't think I'm fucking kissing you goodbye, (F/N). You smell like a brewery." That made you laugh a little and he ruffled your hair before leaving. Sighing in exasperation at yourself, you crawled back under the covers to try and sleep it off.

~~~~~~

It had been touch and go for a bit, but finally you started to feel more human again. You'd showered, twice. The first one made you feel so good that you had another an hour later, hot steamy water bringing you back into the land of the living. Food had been eaten hungrily and you even got to a place where you could stand to have a cigarette, a true sign of recovery. By the time evening came you were right as rain, smoke in one hand and glass of wine in the other, of course. Something tugged at you internally and you started to feel an increasing desire as you waited impatiently for your lover to return. You hadn't been thinking about sex particularly, but you certainly were now.

It was nearly seven when Levi buzzed at your door and you leapt up to let him in. As he saw you in the doorway, his lips pulled into a sideways smirk. "Don't you look a lot more, well, alive than this morning?" You grabbed him by the coat and pulled him inside, shutting the door harshly with your foot. Showering him with kisses, you pressed closely into his body, hands running through raven hair. Hearing a thud, you presumed he'd dropped his bag as his touch was now all over you, lips reciprocating softly. Sighing, you moved it up a notch and slipped your tongue into his mouth, the embrace becoming more and more heated by the second.

Impatiently you pulled at his jacket and only breaking the kiss when required, you both tore off every piece of clothing off that you had until two people were melded together, naked. Pushing him down, he landed in a sitting position on the couch with you on top, straddling his body. His hands traced up your sides, causing shockwaves across your skin as you moaned into the kiss. Already too hot to handle waiting anymore, you rubbed yourself up his length and he groaned at the feeling of your wetness. Breaking away, panting like a woman on a mission, you continued to move slowly and Levi grit his teeth at the amazing sensation. "Jesus fucking christ, (F/N)."

Holding your hips strongly, he lifted you up and brought you back down harshly, filling you instantly. You moaned loudly together at the feeling and continued the strong, slow movements. Placing your hands on the back of the sofa, your breasts in front of his face, you began to quicken the pace, hips rolling seductively with every thrust. He let go and moved his hands up to pinch your nipples hard, causing you to shout out and increase your pushes onto him. It was like the first time; raw, quick sex but with the exquisite addition of pain. Grabbing your breasts and squeezing feverishly, Levi felt on the edge and bit along your collar bone, a sensation that he'd quickly discovered drove you crazy with pleasure.

Squealing, you shoved your face into his neck and grabbed onto the gorgeous figure beneath you, nails digging into his back as your breathing quickened. You whispered his name and the feeling of your breath on his skin combined with the sharpness of your grip sent him insane and he felt his peak approaching strongly. "(F/N)...fuck...(F/N), I'm coming…" He growled and moaned seductively into your shoulder, pushing hard and fast up inside. Fireworks exploded through your whole being as your orgasm hit with force and you shouted against his neck, shaking with ecstasy. Levi released into you with a shuddering groan as you came together in a hot mess of pants and whispers. Slowing, you rode the pleasure out as long as you could and sat entwined together, catching air where you could. 

You moved to place your forehead on his and giggled lightly. "So, yea, I'm feeling much better now, thank you." A look of pure contentment on his face, he smirked, still breathing heavily. 

"I can see that...wow..." Laughing again at how you had incapacitated the man, you kissed him sweetly on the lips.

~~~~~~

Christmas eve was finally here and the office closed at midday. You'd rushed home to prepare your apartment for tomorrow, bright decorations hung in the living room and a small but festive tree was the focal point. Neatly wrapped presents for your friends sat under it and the kitchen was brimming with packs of nibbles, snacks and alcohol. Standing back with hands on hips to survey your handiwork, you thought about how you hadn't got anything for Mike, even though he would be coming. You hardly knew him really though, so a gift might seem odd. And Ymir might bring Historia but you definitely hadn't thought about buying her a present. They seemed to be arguing more and more as the date of the small woman's departure to be a volunteer approached, so she may not even be attending.

Satisfied with how your sudden love for Christmas had manifested in the decorated room, you grabbed your coat and bag to make your way to the bar.

It was buzzing with people inside as you pushed through the doors, a few santa hats on revellers' heads and tinsel wrapped around bodies. You would be closing at eight tonight, not to open again until three days later. Festive music played and Eren's efforts with holly and baubles were still sitting proudly in place. Levi, Hange and Mike were already here at the usual table and you waved across before rushing to the counter. "Hey guys, still up for tomorrow?" The two women nodded as they served customers efficiently and you saw Ymir's expression was dark. Looks like they still haven't made up, you thought. Eren was away visiting family, but he would have been more than welcome at yours if he'd been around.

Sliding into the booth, you leant against Levi, catching the back end of a conversation as Hange shrieked with fervour. "Levi was just telling us about Erwin. Obviously I knew the story, but I never get tired of it!" You looked at Mike as he'd just heard it for the first time and he looked perplexed, but shrugged it off. 

"Seems like a good person to have on your side," he concluded. "Even if it is a bit sinister." Smiling, you sipped at your drink. 

"Fucker deserved it." The other woman laughed loudly and proposed a toast. 

"To bastards getting their dose of karma!" You all followed suit and drank deeply in agreement.

Eight o'clock arrived and just Annie, Levi and you remained, tidying and stacking the dishwashers. A good clean could take place another day, you thought and ushered everyone out, locking up behind you. Hugging your friend, you gave her a kiss on the cheek. "Merry Christmas Annie, see you tomorrow." 

You opened the door to your apartment and walked in, turning the lights on. Realising you were alone, you turned to see a disgruntled man standing in the hallway, lips twitching and a look of pure disgust on his face. "No." One word is all he said and you put your hands out, pouting.

"Why not?" He pointed a delicate finger inside. 

"Looks like santa fucking threw up in here." Snorting laughter, you walked over to him, realising that you may have gone a bit overboard. "I'm not spending any more time than I have to in this fucking place. Get a bag, you're coming to mine." Shaking your head with a smile, you ran around to gather some bits, carefully placing the gift you bought for him into the small piece of luggage - you'd put a lot of thought into it and you hoped it went down well.

As you were leaving, you saw Erwin standing with Levi in the hallway. "Ah (F/N), good to see you looking better than our last encounter!" Mumbling an embarrassed apology, you locked up and turned to your neighbour. 

"Hey, I've got friends coming round tomorrow night for some drinks. Pop in if you're about?" You felt the shorter man stiffen slightly, but ignored the jealous streak that ran through him as the blonde smiled widely. 

"I might just do that, thank you. Have a great Christmas!" Voice booming down the hall, he returned to his home as you and Levi waited for the elevator. Staring at the lights signalling your journey down floor by floor, you thought about how it had been a while since you woke up next to someone on Christmas morning. A silly, perhaps inconsequential thing to think, but you realised that you were truly happy at the prospect of spending it with one particularly unfestive male.


	12. Celebrations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit of a lighter hearted chapter, it is Christmas after all :) Also, I totally disregarded Levi's birthday when I originally wrote this fic for some reason but I'm leaving it as it is, so silent birthday greetings…

It was still dark as you opened your eyes, waking in an unfamiliar setting. Slight light from lamps on the street outside allowed you to look around, gaze running over the large bedroom you were in. You hadn't been in any mood to sight see last night, more preoccupied with the man that had done amazing things to you. A red silk scarf lay on top of the covers and you smiled at the recollection of being blindfolded. There wasn't much in here, wardrobes and sets of drawers, a moody painting hanging on one wall. A large free standing mirror sat on one side and you definitely remembered that from last night too.

Sensing movement, you turned over so you were nose to nose with Levi, smirk tugging at his lips. "Morning gorgeous," he whispered, grey eyes flicking to the faint marks on your clavicle that he had placed there during the heated liaison. His fingers brushed over them, touching what he had claimed as his in a moment of intense passion. You raised your eyebrows, smile growing. 

"Wait until you see your back, Levi." Mock scowl on his face, he turned to catch his reflection, seeing the scratch marks that you had left at some point during last night's long, hot sex. Staring back at you, he growled lowly. 

"Much preferred looking in that last night, (F/N)." Your mind was sent back again to how you had been on hands and knees facing the mirror with him strongly sending you into insane waves of pleasure from behind. It made your heat rise again instantly and you reached over to the silk item. Dangling it in front of him, you smirked. 

"Your turn, Levi." Laughing, you tied it round his eyes before he could stop you and you pinned him down on the bed.

~~~~~~

Finallyyou had both been able to drag yourselves away from the bedroom, legs slightly shaky still as you showered in Levi's large bathroom. Once you were dressed, you placed the small gift in your pocket and made your way into his decidedly non-yule living room. Hot coffee was waiting and you gave him a loving kiss before sitting down on the leather couch.

He brought his own tea over and you cuddled up together, news on the TV showing you clips of people having fun on Christmas day. You were slightly nervous as you brought the small, delicately wrapped present out and passed it to him. "I know you're not into it all, but Merry Christmas Levi." He looked down at you, eyes soft as he took it. Unwrapping the gift, he carefully folded back the paper as you sat up on your knees, almost biting your nails at what he would think. Inside was a box containing something dark and glinting. It was a simple leather bracelet, four soft strips of the black material braided together, secured by silver settings at each end. The clasp was a small but chunky buckle-like fitting, in keeping with the masculine air of the item. He turned it over in his hands, feeling how feather-like the leather was to touch and saw something carved on the inside. It had been done expertly and the material sealed to avoid it fraying or becoming dirty. Four words shone out at him. "To First Name Terms."

It would be meaningless to anyone else, but you had decided on them as it signalled the beginning of your relationship, back at a time where you both realised there was something special about each other. His face was unreadable for a moment and you held your breath. Finally he looked up and you could have sworn there was a faint wet glisten in his eyes as he whispered. "It's fucking perfect (F/N). Thank you." Relief washed over you and he pulled you into a tight hug. No one had ever given him a gift that meant so much. He had never known anyone that meant so much and he didn't really have the ability to think what to say. Composing himself, he sat back, handing it to you. "Can you put it on for me?" You complied, fixing it shut on his wrist and he ran his fingers over it, surprised at how much it suited him and then turned to reach for something at the side of the couch.

Passing you a box, your eyes lit up as you had honestly not expected this, knowing how Levi felt about Christmas. It was heavy and he watched you carefully as you opened it. A plain box sat under the paper and you lifted the lid off. Something shiny was revealed and you brought it out delicately, gasping as you held it in front of you. It was simple, but held so much meaning - in your hand sat a snow globe, the glass orb resting on an intricate silver base, shapes of small snowflakes picked out in amazing detail. Inside the globe was a familiar scene, a small park with a pond and a bench. The exact same park you had shared your first kiss together in.

Eyes wide, you stared at Levi. "How…..where….?" He smiled and shrugged. 

"I know some people." Like you, he had contacted someone to create a bespoke gift, putting thought and care into the gesture. 

"Oh Levi, it's beautiful. Thank you." It was your turn to grip onto him in an embrace and a few tears dripped from your eyes in happiness. He pulled back, hands holding your upper arms gently. 

"You're welcome, (F/N). I'm glad you like it." Grinning now, you looked down at the heavy object in your hand. 

"Like it? I love it." Gaze returning back to his flashing eyes, you took a deep breath. "And I love you, Levi." Words were spoken properly this time as you told him something he knew but hadn't explicitly been said. His grip on you tightened slightly and his top lip twitched into another smile. 

"I love you, (F/N)." Lips connected in a warm, caring kiss and you pressed into one another with contentment.

~~~~~~

It was late afternoon and you gathered your things, retrieving a pair of your panties from the bedroom door handle, not entirely sure how they'd ended up there. Smoothing the bed covers out, you arranged the pillows neatly and lay the red scarf on Levi's side. He watched from the doorway as you tidied up behind you, smiling at your actions. Bag in hand, you kissed him softly as you passed and picked up your snow globe gently, placing it carefully in it's protective box to save it from any unintentional bashes on the walk home. Levi had his own bag, a slightly more manly one this time and he picked some wines from the kitchen to bring. "I've got plenty, you know," you chided. 

"Tch. This is fucking nice, though," he grumbled and you smiled at his careful consideration over the bottles.

The short journey home was quiet, not many people around at this time of day. You presumed most people had gorged themselves too much on traditional roast dinners, a far cry from the pasta dish the two of you had for lunch. As you opened the door to your apartment, Levi squinted with pretend blindness and huffed as he walked into Christmas embodied. Taking your box from your bag, you carefully placed the shaken globe on your coffee table, making it the focal point that it deserved. Arms curled around you from behind and Levi placed his chin on your shoulder as you both watched the tiny snowflakes dance around the scene. You sighed at how pretty it looked, sending your mind back to that day and you turned to place a kiss on his cheek.

A few hours later and glasses, drinks and food had been placed out around the kitchen, the two of you sitting on the couch, open bottle already nearly empty as you waited for your friends to arrive. It wasn't a dressy occasion and you wore dark blue jeans and a long, sheer black shirt. You'd placed a vest top underneath, not wanting everyone to get an eyeful of your bra. You hoped everyone would have fun tonight and wondered if Historia would turn up. Pulling you from your thoughts, Levi nudged you. "You've done a good job here, even if it is a bit fucking bright."

Smiling, you took the grumbled compliment and leaned in for a kiss. It began to get heated quickly and you were sitting on him in seconds, hands pulling at each other's clothes. Just then, the buzzer sounded. "Oh fuck off," he growled as you smiled apologetically. 

"Later, Levi. Later." You shot him a dirty wink as you moved to see who it was. Hange's voice sounded over the intercom and you let her in as hands pulled at your top and you turned to look into dangerous steely eyes. 

"Is that a promise?" he whispered, kissing you passionately again. Breaking away, you smiled. 

"Of course." A knock sounded at the door and you greeted your friend with a hug, noticing Mike stood behind her with bags hanging heavily from his hands. "Jesus, what did she bring?" He just shook his head in response. 

Not long after and everyone was here, with the exception of Historia. Ymir had mumbled something about how she might come later but she was packing for her trip. Drink was flowing and the two men sat watching you and your friends excitedly exchanging gifts on the floor, shaking their heads at the squeals and cries coming from the group. "So fucking juvenile," grumbled Levi, but secretly he loved how animated you were and touched his bracelet that sat under a long sleeve.

Another knock sounded on the door and Annie was closest so she leapt up to answer it, the huge man from down the hall standing at the threshold, bottle in one hand. You waved over and asked him in, leaving your friend standing with her mouth open - it was all over her face, lust at first sight. Shaking your head, she shot you a look as she closed the door and busied herself around Erwin, getting him a drink, offering him a seat and some food.

You'd managed to get some time to speak with your neighbour, asking how long he'd owned a gym for and telling him in perhaps a bit too much detail about your job and how much you loved messing about with computers. He listened politely, sipping his drink and smiling, however you totally forgot to tell him about the bar. "So you're saying you're a bit of a nerd?" Erwin's grin widened as you looked guilty, finally aware that you had been rambling. 

"Sorry Erwin, I guess I'm in a bit of a chatty mood." He shook his head to try to relieve your embarrassment. 

"No need to be sorry (F/N), its good to have hobbies." You knew what one of his hobbies was already and decided to leave that one alone. Annie shuffled over and began chatting away so you quietly slipped off to allow her some dedicated flirting time.

Standing in the kitchen, you listened to the happy conversations coming from behind you and felt joy at having such close friends. As you walked back through with a fresh drink, you saw there was no room on any of the seats. Placing your glass down on the coffee table, you moved to sit in the floor but as you bent, you were grabbed from behind to find yourself sitting sideways on Levi's lap, his arms around your waist, expression stony. "Aww that is just adorable!" screamed Hange, which earned her a scowl. 

"Fuck off," he spat, but his face had turned softer as he dug into your side, tickling you and making you cry out with laughter.

Historia had arrived half an hour later and she seemed to be a bit more open to having other women around her girlfriend today. You'd sat down on Levi again, but lounged back to the side of him a bit to make it more comfortable, your legs hanging over his and your head resting against his shoulder. Absent mindedly you played with his fingers and watched with amusement as Hange tried to get people to play Twister.

"I think this is where I take my leave. I have an early start tomorrow. Many thanks for your hospitality (F/N)," said Erwin, standing slowly. Smooth. In one movement he'd gotten himself out of the awkward prospect of a close game with people he had only just met. You tried to get up to walk him to the door but you were kind of wedged between your lover and the arm of the couch, position resulting in you flapping your limbs around with futility. Laughing, the tall male put a hand up. "Don't worry, I can see myself out." Smiling weakly, you nodded and called out your farewells. Annie shot to the door to open it for him and she gave him her best flirtatious gaze. Once he had gone, giggles sounded round the room and shrugging, your blonde friend sat down. 

"What? He's fucking huge." Laughter broke out and Hange started to try and gather people together again.

"Come on Levi, you know you want to?" she pleaded.

"As long as I draw breath, I will not be playing that stupid fucking game." 

"So I can use your dead body to play it?" The retort was shot back flawlessly, causing more snorts of laughter. Mike and Annie took pity and joined in as Levi threw you easily over onto the now vacant space on the couch. Pouting, you glared at him and he simply shrugged. 

"You were cutting off the circulation in my legs." Throwing a pillow at him, he blocked it easily and chucked it back, smiling as he got you square in the face. 

"You will pay," you threatened, pointing at him with a frown. Raised eyebrows and an amused stare looked back and you couldn't help but smirk.

"Jesus, get a room," shouted Hange from the strange position she was in on the floor and you sat up and glared down at her. 

"I've got one, thanks, but incase you weren't aware, I have company, so…." Holding your hands up, you shrugged as she replied without pausing. 

"That's ok (F/N), we won't watch if you two want to go through and get jiggy." Mike blushed and Ymir laughed from the kitchen, but you and Levi remained passive. That was until he spoke. 

"Not possible. She's a bit fucking loud." He pointed a thumb over at you, expression emotionless as he leant over to pick up his drink. Mouth open, you blushed worse than Mike and struggled to breathe. Jeers sounded out in the room and you shook your head as you lit a cigarette, sitting back with crossed legs in a pose that emanated anger. 

"Fucking dick," you grumbled with no malice whatsoever, shooting Levi a playfully murderous look. He just stared back, smug smirk in place and held his hand up in a one armed shrug as if to let you know he was only telling the truth.

Once the attention had returned to the game, Historia asked where the bathroom was. You directed her to it and apologised for recent events, realising she must have felt a bit awkward. The dainty woman smiled and it totally changed her features. "No worries, (F/N). I'm a bit loud, too." Winking, she walked off leaving you to sit and wonder what had happened to change her personality. Maybe seeing you all having fun together had mellowed her, you thought. Ymir rushed over as soon as she noticed her girlfriend leave. 

"We're going to shoot off soon. She's going tomorrow so we have to say goodbye again." Another wink was sent your way and you mentally nodded. That was it. They must have had make-up sex earlier.

Annie hadn't lasted much longer after the couple left, drink kicking in and soon it was just four of you remaining. Hange and Mike were stuffed into one of the large comfortable chairs, fast asleep. Having forgiven Levi slightly, you were curled up into him with a drink, poking him repeatedly in the abs. "Fucking stop it, you idiot," he said, squirming. Grinning, you sipped at the wine and leant away slightly, giving him a naughty look. 

"Payback." His lips twitched, remembering all too well the last time the two of you had teased each other with that word and you saw how his eyes lit up, treating him to a slow wink.

Turning, his expression darkened. "What are we going to do with these two?" He pointed at the snoring couple in the chair. You shrugged and raised your voice. 

"Hange?" Not quite shouting, but loud enough. "Mike?" Nothing. Moving it up a notch, you spoke louder. "Fire!" They remained as they were, soundly asleep in the dreamless slumber of the drunken. Looking back at Levi, you raised an eyebrow. "I can try and be quiet?" Grabbing your hand, he led you through the apartment, shutting the living room door and marching down the hall to your bedroom. 

"Don't even fucking think about it. You know it drives me crazy when you scream." Giggling, you reached round to grab his crotch, feeling that his excitement had already begun.

At one point in the night you'd run quietly through to grab glasses, wine and cigarettes, knowing that both of you were nowhere near ready to sleep yet. You had a thought and stopped to leave a note for the two that were still passed out - it let them know if they woke up, they were more than welcome to take the second bedroom. Not wanting to disappoint Levi, you hadn't made any conscious attempt at being quiet and just hoped they were too out of it to notice.

~~~~~~

Up early as usual, you made your way to the living area after brushing your teeth and stuck your head through the door to see if they were still asleep. No one was there, so you went back to listen at the second bedroom door. Snores sounded out and you smiled. Moving to your room, you whispered in at Levi. "They went to bed, I'm gonna go clear up." He groaned and winced as he moved. 

"Fuck it." Looking at him with a questioning gaze, he glared back. 

"You and your fucking nails." Laughing lightly, you rolled your eyes and left him to feel sorry for himself, feeling no remorse for the small marks you must have left all over his back. And ass. And maybe shoulders. Only fair, you thought, well aware of the new red bite on your collar bone.

Taking your time, you tidied and loaded the dishwasher, binned bottles and packets and swept up crumbs. It didn't take too long and on completion, you sat down, dragging on a cigarette. Levi prowled through, shooting an evil stare your way and set about making you both a hot drink. He joined you, wearing a t-shirt and sweats, sinking down into the sofa. You actually started to feel a bit bad and began to apologise until he cut you off with a kiss. "Don't be fucking soft, (F/N). I'm just messing." His eyelids lowered as he continued. "I fucking love it when you do that." You growled playfully and pulled him in for another kiss.

About an hour later, Hange came shuffling through, looking rough as a cat that had been dragged through a hedge sideways. Throwing herself onto the chair, she mumbled her thanks at the note you had left. "What time did you go through?" She thought about it for a bit, and gave you an uncertain answer. 

"Three? Maybe four? I'm not sure. Slept like a fucking baby before that though, even though I was upright." Secretly you were relieved that she hadn't heard anything last night and went to make her a coffee. "Sleep well Levi?" Her question was asked perhaps a bit too happily and he nodded as you brought the drink over. "Thanks, (F/N). By the way, whatever you got up to, I didn't hear a thing so don't worry." Inwardly you relaxed and sat back down. "Mike might have though." You stiffened at her dirty look. "He sleeps lighter than me." Oh shit.

Mike had said nothing, but you thought he might be looking at you weird as they left yours around ten in the morning. Closing the door, you breathed deeply and leant back against the wood. Levi snorted and walked over, pulling you into him. "I'm sure he didn't hear anything. You did hold back a bit, after all." Looking shocked, you slapped his arm. 

"No I didn't?" Nodding with mock sorrow, he ran his hands up your back. 

"Afraid so. Make it up to me?" Smirking, he tilted his head. Damn. His ability to wrap you around his little finger was incredible.

~~~~~~

Back to reality. You sat at your desk, coffee in one hand and eyes on the screens. An email popped up from Levi, asking you to meet him in his office in ten minutes. Wondering what was up, you finished your hot drink and typed a few more lines before getting up and making your way to see him. Knocking on the heavy door, you heard his voice trickle through. "Come." Was that intentional? Opening up, ready to shoot a dirty comment his way, you pulled your best sexy look and stepped in.

Instantly changing expression, you straightened as you saw the fat bearded exec sitting with Levi on the couch. Bollocks, totally mis-read this situation. Lips twitching ever so slightly, your lover stood and gestured to the matching leather chair. "Seat, Ms (L/N)?" Trying to regain composure, you smiled sweetly and sat in a ladylike pose. Amused by how you carried yourself at work, the pale man sat back once more, legs crossed and arm laying lightly on the back of the sofa. It was bizarre to be sitting here like this after how you had been over the past few days and your mind wandered into dirty territory.

Snapping out of it, you looked across at the men, wondering what was going on. The exec smiled, looking at your legs and you almost shivered with disgust. "I wanted to be the one to let you know," he began. "The board was impressed with the presentation you both delivered." God, you'd forgotten about that, so much had happened since then. "Very impressed." There he was, looking at your legs again. "And I'm pleased to say we accept your proposals. Consider your budget doubled. You have free rein to take this forward as Mr Ackerman sees fit."

Pride swelled as all of your hard work was being recognised. This had been a long, arduous road but it had all paid off in the end. "Thank you Sir," you said, smiling. Really must learn his name. "That's fantastic news." Everyone rose and hands were offered, shakes all round. Levi's eyes looked flecked with silver as he shook your hand, lingering a bit too far past a business-like gesture and with a smile, the bearded man walked to the door. 

"I'll leave you two to talk over your plans. You must have a lot to discuss. Congratulations again."

He left and the two of you looked at each other for a moment, smiles creeping onto both of your faces and unable to contain himself any longer, he grabbed you round the waist and picked you up. Quietly squeaking at him to put you down, he slid you to the floor and planted a warm kiss on your lips. "I'm so fucking proud of you, (F/N)," he said. "You did this. Made it possible." Another kiss pressed onto your mouth and you smiled. 

"I didn't do it all, Levi. You talked the talk." He shook his head. 

"Let's call it a joint effort?" Nodding, you laughed. 

"Yea, ok. We fucking rock." He looked a bit disgusted with your terminology, but squeezed you tightly. 

"First things fucking first, (F/N). Lets celebrate." You smirked. 

"Bar at 7?" He returned the small smile. 

"Bar at 7."

~~~~~~

Thoughts ran through both of your minds at the possibilities that were now in front of you. It was a project that would require a team and a shift in responsibilities, all of which was really exciting. "I know. Fucking got it." You looked at the pale man by your side as he spoke from next to you in the booth. "You can be my personal assistant." He said it with such seriousness that for a moment you thought he meant it. About to go ballistic and tell him exactly why that would never happen, ever, you were stopped as he smirked. Slapping him on the leg, you started to laugh. 

"You'd better be fucking joking. You know full well what my potential is, Mr Ackerman." Leaning over, he purred in your ear. 

"I do indeed."

Life seemed to be going in the right direction for once in your existence and you smiled widely, grateful for the break in the seemingly constant trail of shit that appeared in both of your lives.


	13. Past And Future

January 1st. A new year rolled in with predictability, along with many sore heads and delicate stomachs. Being one of the few people in the city capable of coherent movement, you were currently the only person working at the bar. It was a good day to be open as drinkers needed to top up from the day before and self medicate to ease their pain but it was only late afternoon, just a handful patrons milling about.

Sighing, you turned to the papers you'd brought with you, casting your eye over the proposed new set up at the office. Levi would head it up, naturally, with you as second in command and in charge of co-ordination, analysis and planning. You'd chosen Armin to be your right hand man and would task him with the reporting and data gathering. He would excel at this kind of thing, you knew it and with your support you imagined he would be making a name for himself soon. Two others had been picked, based on reputation alone as you weren't familiar with them. Marco and Connie. They completed the small project team and would be responsible for carrying out the new ways of working, testing the limits of your proposals and trying to find any flaws in the plan.

You imagined at some point there would be meetings with the exec and some external companies, but that could be worried about later. Whichever way, if this worked it would make your company a lot of money. Closing the file, you shoved it in your large bag behind the counter and as you stood, a familiar face appeared in front of you. "Busy, isn't it?" Smiling, you wiped your hands on a cloth. 

"I'm bored shitless, Levi. Please kill me now." Scowling, he moved round behind the bar and pulled you into him. 

"How about I just talk to you, ease the fucking mind numbing day?" Nodding, you sighed again. 

"That would be good. The others should be in soon so I can get myself out and on the other side of this sodding counter."

As evening took hold, the bar grew busier and Annie and Eren turned up for work. You gave the young man a hug as you hadn't seen him since before Christmas. "Happy New Year," you smiled, holding him at arm's length. "New hair too?" He nodded, grinning. 

"My girlfriend did it for me!" Looking at him with joy, you gazed over his blonde highlights, thinking how well they'd been executed. 

"Does that mean you're going to stop flirting with everyone now that you're taken?" It was a light hearted question and he grinned wider still. 

"Hell no." Laughing as he bounced off, you watched him dance around, so full of life.

You'd run out for a smoke quickly and now sat at a stool next to Levi as there was someone in your usual booth. It was a bit disappointing, but it didn't matter, seats were inconsequential. The place was heaving with bodies and loud music pounded as you turned to watch the crowds. Hair standing up on the back of your neck, you were aware of someone watching you, but it took you a while to seek out the blue eyes that stared from across the room. Connecting gazes, you froze, not just in movement, you actually felt like you had iced over from the inside and were sure you would throw up there and then.

The dark haired man by your side sensed something change in your demeanour and followed an intense glare across the bar. He saw an old man, large and looking like he still had some strength from his younger years. Frowning, Levi looked back to you and saw how your throat moved like you were swallowing back the need to be sick and that's when he realised instantly what was going on.

Before either of you could do anything, the man stood and walked towards you and fists clenched at your sides. Jumping down from the seat, you paced menacingly for him, meeting in the middle of the room next to a large support pillar. Your lover was by your side immediately, hate pouring from his body and the older man cackled, a disgusting sound which made you gag. "Like father like daughter, eh? Always drinking. Where is the old fool?" Why would he have known? You filled him in. 

"He's dead. What the fuck do you want?" Still smiling, your step-grandfather looked down at you both.

"Just wanted to see how the place looked nowadays. I never imagined you'd be here though, (F/N). That was just the icing on the cake." You were not in the slightest bit interested in anything else he had to say and raised your hands. 

"I don't actually give a shit to be honest. Now get the fuck out of here." Words dripped with hatred as you stepped forward and suddenly he grabbed your arm, making your stomach turn at his touch and he laughed again, full of sarcasm as he spoke. "Oh no, (F/N). Did you do this for me?" He pointed at your wrist and you realised you'd forgotten to wear any bracelets today.

That tipped you over the edge and you were overcome by an immense strength you'd never felt before. Fire rushed through your body and you must have changed your scowl as the man dropped your limb and took a step back. Not letting him get away, you grabbed him and pulled him to the door, pushing the prick out onto the cold paving outside. Standing over him, you didn't care if anyone was looking as you laid powerful kicks into his prone form. "Fuck off and never come near me again," you seethed. He turned and unbelievably began to chuckle. 

"But I thought you liked it, (F/N)?" Your final kick hit him in the teeth and you watched as blood ran out of his mouth in a small trickle.

No one came to stop you. It was quiet outside and the position of the small fences around the outdoor smoking area meant that any passers by wouldn't see what was on the ground. Not giving him the satisfaction of an answer, you just leant over and spat in his face. It wasn't something you'd ever done before and it disgusted you slightly to actually carry out that action, but it was all he was worth.

Watching as the sorry excuse for a human dragged himself up, you stared with complete malice as he stumbled off into the dark evening, not giving you a second glance. Once he'd disappeared around the corner, you didn't relax. "Fucking shit." Shouting, you kicked the fence over and over, then turned to punch the wall, unaware of any pain whatsoever. Pacing up and down, you mumbled to yourself and then gripped tightly to the dark green wooden borders and leant down, throwing up involuntarily. Uncontrollable contractions in your stomach kept coming and you ended up dry retching, nothing left to come out. Staying bent for a while to compose yourself before you stood, you wiped your hand over your mouth and eventually straightened up.

You turned to Levi. "Ok. I'm ok. Fuck him." Grey eyes watched you closely as you visibly meant those words, looking determinedly at your lover. Lighting a cigarette, you passed one to him and dragged at yours gratefully. No more words were exchanged, they weren't needed as he observed your lightly trembling body but strong gaze. Walking inside, you excused yourself and made your way out the back. In a small set of drawers you found your stash, a collection of small travel size toothbrushes and toothpastes - it wasn't the first time you'd been sick here, but it was the first time it was due to anything other than over indulgence.

Once freshened up at the sink, you stood in the quiet room for a moment, taking deep breaths. Mentally removing that stinking old man from your life, you strode back out and took up your seat next to Levi and he placed a strong arm around your waist, pulling you close. "Ok?" You nodded. 

"Yea, just had to brush my teeth. I'm ok." Aware of eyes on you still, you turned. "Honestly Levi. It's the past, and it will stay in the past. I'm focussing on the future, with you." Grey eyes met (e/c) ones, locked steadily together. Moving in closer, Levi took your lips into a soft kiss.

The moment was ruined by Annie whistling and you broke away, smiling broadly at the man next to you. He just rolled his eyes and huffed, face returning to standard annoyance. "Fuck off," he grumbled over the bar to the blonde and she laughed good naturedly. 

"It's like when you see a ghost. You know they exist, but you still get excited when you spot one." Both of you stared, totally confused by her metaphor. 

"What the fuck, ghosts?" Shrugging, she wiped at a non-existent stain on the counter before responding to you. 

"They're fucking real."

~~~~~~

Standing against the wall at the back of his office, you tried so hard not to laugh. Levi was in full director mode, pacing in front of the three men that stood before him, eyes bored and expression unreadable. He had just finished a speech on what was expected of them now that they were under his command, pointing out that bullshit would not be tolerated and any fuck ups and they were out.

What amused you the most was how you saw each side of him, as he did you. Your personal life was easily separated from your work, only a few mannerisms and personality traits running through both. Of course, he could go full asshole outside of work, but not with you. Similarly, you could be scatty and sometimes child-like, but only with him. Watching him put the fear of god into the men in the room, you replayed a simple moment in your mind, thinking back to yesterday when he was patiently showing you how to make the perfect cup of tea whilst wearing fluffy slippers.

Armin looked on the verge of tears, but you knew you had to keep quiet and let Levi finish, retaining composure at all times. "Any fucking questions?" Heads shook vehemently and a stony gaze was given in your direction. As he walked towards you, a small smirk was shot your way, showing you how much he had just enjoyed that. You nodded, showing no emotion and set about taking the gathered group through your plans.

A large private office had been sectioned off for the project and a couple of hours later, the new couple were setting up. Laptops were everywhere in a mess of wires and plugs, papers neatly piled in stark contrast to the electronic chaos. One of the screens showed a program you had never seen before and it looked exciting to your organised mind. Rows of data was set out as some kind of computerised brain sorted and extracted numbers and you noticed a small logo that you didn't recognise. Aware of eyes staring, you turned and saw a mix of amusement and despair and heard a tired voice. "It's only fucking software." You'd been oblivious to your expression and realised you had been staring open mouthed at the screen with pure joy. "It's a prototype and no, you can't fucking touch it."

The three other members of the team stood outside the door, pausing before entering. Armin blushed as they listened to the words that came through in muffled tones.

"Please Levi, just let me have it?"

'No, fuck off. Have some patience."

"But I want to play with it!"

"(F/N), exercise fucking self control. Hands off."

The shaven headed man grinned. "I'm going in." Before the others could stop him, Connie strode in with glee shining in his eyes as he hoped to stumble across an awkward situation. His shoulders slumped as he saw you hanging over a laptop, fingers ready to tap the keys and Levi grabbing you back. "I said no, not until we meet the shitty company that we want to buy this from." He knew of your love for computers and saw how you looked on it like a new toy, but he couldn't let you loose. Pouting, you stood back and turned to the newcomers.

"Come in! Sit, sit. We have lots to do." Wondering why Armin was beetroot in colour, you mentally shrugged and rushed the men inside as Levi took his place at the head of the table. Leaning over, you whispered to the youngest in the group as Connie and Marco began chatting through some of their ideas. "What's up?" He looked startled, like a rabbit in the headlights and stuttered his response. 

"N-nothing, just that…..it sounded…..a b-bit weird before we saw what you were talking about." Now it was your turn to blush and you giggled nervously at the realisation. Ruffling his hair, you grinned and shook your head to dismiss the thought.

Armin had gotten straight to work on the data gather as you sat with the other two, talking the process over. Connie was full of life, slightly mischievous and seemed like he would be a lot of fun. Marco had the most adorably friendly face and looked incapable of a harsh word as he asked you something earnestly. "So what if that doesn't happen?" He was pointing at a screenshot on the papers and you smiled in reassurance. 

"That's what you're here for, to tell me when it doesn't work and to see if there's a way around it. Or a way to break it." Nodding, he turned to the laptop and began to test the systems as Connie grinned. 

"This is going to be fun. I like breaking things." Not realising how sinister it appeared at first, he gradually looked to you as it sank in. "Not that I'm some sort of hooligan. Shit. That sounded awful." You laughed his concern away and waved your hand to show him it was fine. Levi was unmoved by any of it and sat scowling at something in front of him on the table. Curiosity taking over, you walked round to see what it was, almost putting your arm over his shoulders before you realised where you were. He hadn't cared if you were seen leaving the party together, but you assumed he certainly would do if you just started hugging him in the office.

Looking down, you saw it was a list of the people that you would be meeting with later to discuss purchasing the full software package. Why was he frowning at it? He stiffened and folded the paper back up. "We'll review the results in an hour, then decide if we actually want to buy this shit." And with that he left, leaving you perplexed.

~~~~~~

Three visitors occupied the plush room that you and Levi entered and you moved to shake the hands of the two men and one woman before sitting. Hearing muttered greetings, you glanced up as a stony expression stared at the woman. Actually, no, not at. Through. "Hello Levi," she said, a hint of something in her voice that you couldn't quite place as you were inwardly surprised that she seemed to know him. One word was curtly delivered in response. 

"Petra."

Sensing his tension and fully aware of the distaste on his face, you moved quickly to start the meeting, talking in over-friendly tones and hoping the others hadn't picked up on the mood in the room. As they went through their sales pitch you glanced over, eyes scanning across Levi's stiffened body and harder than usual death stare. The woman kept flicking her gaze across to him, a bit more than needed. Assessing her minutely, you made your own assumptions. She was dressed well, spoke well, but looked like her work came before all else, no time for hobbies or having fun. She also seemed a bit nervous around the dark haired man at your side, obviously not full of the hatred that he seemed to possess for her.

Reaching for a glass of water, Levi caught sight of your face, the way you were sizing up the other female in the room. It wasn't a look of jealousy that had overcome you, but a calculated stare of scrutiny and it amused him slightly to see how much you could actually be like him at times.

Meeting over, you stood shaking hands with the men, wishing them well and thanking them for their time. You were aware of a short conversation out of the corner of your eye that ended in Petra trailing rather sullenly away, not even attempting to say goodbye to you. Door closing, you breathed out loudly and started tidying the papers. He would tell you whatever he wanted to when he was good and ready and you would not prod him for information.

You didn't have to wait long as a deep, spiteful voice sounded out in the room. "She's my ex." That was no surprise to you, it was one of the first conclusions you'd come to earlier. Knowing there was more, you sat back down next to him, studying his features and finding malice and anger. His fists clenched as they sat on top of the gleaming table and he continued.

"We were only together for a few fucking months, so it's not like I got attached or anything." A small laugh escaped your lips without meaning to and you apologised as he turned his glare sideways. 

"We've only really known each other for just under four months." He dismissed your words with a flick of the wrist and a sound of annoyance. 

"Yes (F/N), but I think you'll agree when I say that we are not a normal couple and that the passage of time for us is different." Interested, you faced him further, leaning over and elaborating, he carried on.

"We've been with other people, gone on fucking dates, played the game. But for what? A bit of shitty companionship that always ends?" You were almost hanging over the side of the chair now. "This," he motioned between you. "This is different. We've gone through things that some people never do in years of marriage. Told each other things that otherwise remain secret." Holding your breath, his words sounded passionate and true, even if his voice had the same bored drawl as always. Locking on to your eyes with his grey stare, you saw the emotion that flashed within them. "This is real, (F/N). We can finally be ourselves." 

Bursting with love, you nearly fell off the black swivel seat as you grabbed hold of him in a tight hug, burying your face into his fresh smelling suit. Composing yourself, you sat back carefully so as not to go tumbling to the floor and smiled, not needing to add anything more to what he'd just said. He visibly moved on and turned to look out of the window.

"She cheated on me. Wouldn't have fucking cared to be honest if it hadn't have been the way in which she did it." Hands balled up, he shook his head with a wry smile on his lips. "I had a house party, only a few people, but it was a very drunken one. Found her fucking one of Farlan's friends on my bed." You gasped, not being naive enough to think that people didn't cheat, but the situation was awful - knowing someone cheated and seeing it were two different things entirely.

"So I threw everyone out, got fucking smashed and moved to a new apartment the week after." You were glad he'd moved. People don't need an image like that in their head every time they go to bed. "That was about ten months ago and I never heard from her since, just got on with my work and stayed away from most people." He paused. "Until I saw you standing shaking behind that bar." Looking up at you again, his eyes were softer now. "Come on, we'd better go. Those shit heads have probably fucked something up by now."

The day had been productive and spirits ran high, all apart from Levi who stared down with burning eyes, looking like he was trying to set the paper before him on fire. He hadn't heard the conversation and only looked up as you stood closely next to him. "Connie suggested a drink to celebrate our first day. I'm a creature of habit, Levi. Shall I suggest the bar?" He mulled it over, thoughts turning in his head. Fuck knows he needed a drink and you certainly did, clasped hands covering up the tremors. Nodding once, he muttered to you from the corner of his mouth. 

"I'm not staying for long. Fucking small talk bores me."

The five of you had left work and shared a large seven seater cab to the bar. You pointed them all to the booth and asked what everyone wanted, moving quickly up to the counter. "Hey Annie," you smiled. "What's new? Any more ghosts?" Shooting you a dark look, she mumbled something about not sleeping. At your quizzical expression, she gave up more information. 

"I can't stop thinking about Erwin, it's driving me insane." Shaking your head, you grinned across at her. 

"Well what's stopping you? I can get his number?" She seemed horrified at the idea of making such a bold move, but internally was considering it. Changing subject, she nodded over to the booth as you got drinks from behind the bar and explained. "Work colleagues. I'm sure this won't last long. It means Levi has to suffer small talk and won't be able to touch me." Smirking, you didn't need to explain that an office romance was not the sort of thing either of you wanted to be accused of just yet, being private people. Not thinking of how it looked, you brought the drinks over to three surprised faces. Marco spoke up. 

"Did you just pull those pints yourself?" You smiled in reply as you passed the two beers to him and Connie, a gin and tonic to Armin and placed the bottle and glasses for you and your partner. 

"Actually I own this place." Connie laughed as Levi stepped out to let you sit between him and Armin, not wanting to get too close to his subordinates. 

"That is so fucking cool, (F/N)!" Connie looked over to the bar. "Who's the blonde?" Sliding in, you laughed. 

"Sorry, she's currently thinking about hooking up with a rather large neighbour of mine." It didn't deter him. 

"Only thinking about it?"

Marco changed the course of the conversation. "So how come you own a bar, (F/N)? You don't seem the type." Amusement on your face, you raised an eyebrow. 

"And what type would that be?" He seemed flustered and you smirked, taking your glass in your hand. 

"I don't actually know. Sorry." Waving away his apology, you told them it had been your father's and you'd inherited it, that was all that needed to be said.

A few drinks later and you asked Levi to let you out so you could run for a smoke. "I'll have one too," he grumbled, thoroughly hating the fact that he had to keep his hands off you. As you excused yourself, you missed Armin turning to the others, his face slightly flushed from the alcohol already. 

"Did you notice?" Two blank faces stared back. "She didn't ask Levi what he wanted to drink. Just brought that bottle over." Connie laughed and slapped him hard on the back, making the small man jump forward. 

"So what? They know each other. Marco knows I drink beer, he wouldn't have asked me either. So you reckon we're an item?" The freckled man put on mock disgust and moved over a bit on the seat, creating distance between him and his friend.

Outside, you dragged on the cigarette, enjoying the cold evening air as a mumble came from one side. "Can we fucking go home yet?" 

"Oh come on, it's not that bad," you said with a hint of exasperation. "They're good guys." He tensed up, his mood dark. 

"I don't give a shit, (F/N). I'm fucking horny." Giggling, you saw him shoot you a glance, lips turning up in an evil smirk but before you could continue, someone walked over to you. Levi nearly growled and your eyes widened as you saw Petra coming close.

"Have you been fucking following me?" he spat, flicking his cigarette into the street. 

"Levi, can we talk? In private?" Her head gestured to you and you went to leave. 

"No." A hand grabbed your arm tightly but he stared ahead. "If anyone is going, it's you. She stays." His expression was at his baseline of bored disinterest, but you could feel how hard he gripped you. Petra looked you up and down and you stared back at her, not revealing anything and feeling decidedly uncomfortable. Huffing, she turned back to him. 

"Ok, fine. I followed you. But only because I wanted to apologise." Smiling without humour, he shook his head. 

"I don't think so, Petra." Her name left his mouth with slight venom. She looked hurt, but not surprised. 

"Levi, I was drunk and…." He cut her off by raising his hand. Leaning over, he whispered in her face. 

"Listen to me. I. Don't. Give. A. Shit." Each word came out slowly and she winced as they cut into her. "Being drunk does not excuse actions. And besides," he stood up straight once more. "What makes you think that I would be remotely fucking interested in hearing your lame ass excuses? You want to try to rekindle anything we had?" The words came out without any emotion and his eyes looked a dull steel. "I'm telling you now, we had nothing. It was a way to pass the time and a fucking boring one at that. Now piss off and leave me alone."

Without needing to be told, you opened the door and walked straight in as you saw Levi stride past to the bar. Faces looked up expectantly from the booth. "Sorry guys, bumped into an old friend." Sitting back down, you felt their gazes and realised this had maybe been a bad idea as Connie cleared his throat.   
"I think I'm going to shoot off, I want to be clear headed for tomorrow." As he stood, the pale man returned with a tray full of drinks for everyone. "Or maybe I could stay, no harm is there?" He sank back and grinned as his next beer was placed in front of him. Confusion darted quickly over your features, wondering why your lover had bothered to indulge those he had previously not wanted to spend time with. His face was unreadable as he filled your glass and you decided just to let it be.

Later in the evening, drunken laughter sounded around the booth and you leant back, slightly smug that you had only faint effects of the alcohol you'd consumed. Armin was totally fucked and he slid over onto the bald man next to him, slurring. "You're really funny, you know that?" Tomorrow would be amusing, you thought with a smirk. Marco's head was nearly on the table and you looked over to Levi to be met with half lidded eyes that screamed at you to leave. Feeling a squeeze on your leg, you suppressed the need to reciprocate and spoke across the table. 

"Maybe we should call it a night?" Armin nodded with exaggerated movements and the freckled male groaned. Only Connie protested.

"No! (F/N), you're not even drunk yet!" Smiling sweetly, you started to gather your bag and coat. 

"Seriously, I am. I'm just really good at hiding it. Let's get going." The fuzzy scalped man sighed and set about helping the tallest reveller out of the seats. Rolling your eyes, you imagined having to hail three cabs to make sure they made it home ok, but your thoughts were cut short. 

"Hey guys, come back to mine. I have beer?" Seemed like someone had snapped out of it as you saw Marco pointing to the occupants of the booth. He managed to gather the others in his arms and made for the door whilst you and Levi hung back a bit until you saw them get in a taxi. Letting out a terse breath, he stood and pulled you up. 

"My place. Now." Squealing at the insistence in his voice, your stomach jumped as he led you out with an arm around your waist.

The short walk was made with quick strides and flirtatious touches. You noticed how his hands couldn't hold his keys steady and knowing it wasn't from drink, you wondered just how badly he wanted you. Door closing swiftly, the man turned and looked at you with an animal lust. "Keeping my fucking hands off you all night was intolerable." He paced towards you, kissing your neck as he got close. "Do you trust me?" Feeling his words on your skin, you nodded. 

"Of course." Drawing back, he gazed into your eyes with a sparkling tint. 

"How do you feel about being tied up?"

Your orbs widened and turned brighter than ever before, thinking how you had always wanted to do it, but never had enough faith in anyone before now and you bit your lip in excitement. Seeing the way your face changed, Levi looked upon you with anticipation and stroked your cheek gently. His smirk sent shivers through your soul as he pulled you towards the bedroom, undoing his shirt buttons as he went.


	14. Awakened Sensations

Hot water ran down your body and you stretched, muscles aching. It was a good pull though, reminding you of last night and how alive you felt. If you had even suggested to any of your exes only half the things that you'd done in the bedroom yesterday, they probably would have dumped you and run as fast as they could. God they had been boring, excruciatingly so, but you'd never realised just how much until now. You were a bit surprised though, having assumed Levi would take control, yet he'd been more than happy to submit to you too.

It was nearly 6am and you'd rushed home to get ready for work, leaving your lover at his apartment. As he stepped out of his own bathroom, he carefully put the leather band around his wrist that you had given him and spotted the slight red marks on his skin. He smirked at the memory and wondered how he'd been so lucky to have found you.

There was a spring in your step as you almost skipped down the hallway to the project room a couple of hours later, dark purple dress swinging at your knees. Luckily it had a high collared neck as Levi had paid a lot of attention to the place he knew you loved to feel his mouth. Small bite marks ran down your chest, made with slightly more force than he had done before and it had driven you crazy, enhancing every feeling ten fold. The mixture of pain and passion was incredible, teeth against your soft flesh, fabric digging tightly into your wrists and the soft leather of a belt. Not too hard, but enough to send you reeling into an intensity you had never felt before. Everything you'd done had been agreed upon by you both, no surprises, just consensual acts.

As you walked through the door, you saw two of the team were already in attendance. Armin didn't even move as you entered, his face covered by hands and a moaning noise coming from what sounded like his very soul. Levi looked over at you, eyes full of mischief and his lips curling slightly into a smirk as he greeted you. "Morning, (F/N). I trust you had a good sleep?" Shooting him your own dirty look, you nodded slowly.

"Best I have ever had, Levi." You doubted the petite blonde was even listening and didn't even try to disguise the smut behind your words. Sitting, you turned the laptop on with your left hand and let your right trail up Levi's inner thigh as you leant over slightly and pinched his flesh. Grey eyes clouded over and lips parted, a tiny and almost unnoticeable reaction of his that you were well aware of.

Armin groaned and you sat up straight and business like as he finally lowered his arms. His face was a picture of over indulgence, eyes puffy from lack of sleep and a look of nausea painted all over him. Smiling warmly, you looked into his bloodshot stare as you spoke quietly. "Hey, you ok? Do you want a coffee?" The young man couldn't nod as that would send blades stabbing through his head, so he settled for a whisper, not wanting to make any unnecessary vibrations in his brain. 

"Please, (F/N). Please." He looked terrible and you sympathized immensely with the agony he must be in. You grabbed your purse and stood, making a note to pick up pain killers too and quickly rushed out to the local coffee shop and nearby pharmacy.

Hange was standing last in line for her own morning caffeine fix and she waved you over with a grin. "Hi (F/N)," she squealed, pulling you into a big hug and placing a wet kiss on your lips. "I don't get to see you nearly enough now you're in that stupid project room. It's not fair." She was almost pouting, body language matching that of a toddler about to throw a tantrum and you patted her arm reassuringly. 

"It's only for a few months Hange, then I'll be back where I belong! Anyway, it only started yesterday!" That seemed to sufficiently placate her and you shuffled forward in the queue, one step closer to the cashier.

"So," she began, and you rolled your eyes. Her low conspiring tone said it all. "What have you and shorty been up to?" The woman had an unhealthy obsession and you gave her a look of exasperation. 

"Hange, why do you need to know? Is Mike not pushing your buttons anymore?" Huffing, she shook her head strongly. 

"Of course he is, don't be silly. I'm very satisfied. Very." Emphasis was placed on the last word as she pointed, a gesture that added weight to the situation. "And you're not getting out of it that easy, (F/N). You're positively glowing today. What did you do last night?" Damn her, she knew you were as filthy minded as her at times and you always got hooked, but you weren't going to give in easily. 

"Oh you know, the usual." As you spoke, you put on a fake far away gaze as if recollecting the evening's events. Your friend was bouncing up and down now as she whispered harshly. 

"Come on (F/N), just give me something to help me sleep at night?" Tilting your head back, you looked across at her with pretend shock. 

"Hange, I don't want you lying in bed at night thinking about me while you touch yourself." Your friend was loving it and an evil smile crossed her lips. 

"I don't need to do that anymore, I'll get Mike to help me out." Laughing, you shook your head as you moved up the queue further, nearly at the front. She still stood close, a questioning look in her gleaming eyes. Finally giving in, you decided to let her have one thing and pulled up your long sleeves slowly, pushing your arms in her face as you huddled together. She looked down at the back of your wrists and saw the faint red marks on your skin. They had been more noticeable earlier and were already starting to fade, much to your dismay.

Eyes wide, her mouth hung open in a slack gape and you heard her breathe out in what could only be described as a mewl of awe, like a kid seeing the presents under the Christmas tree. She grabbed your limb, staring at the small circle that sat on your wrist like a bracelet as if it would give her the answers to the universe. You couldn't help but smirk as her shocked expression turned up to meet your gaze, her own grin creeping across widening lips. In a whisper, she finally spoke. "You kinky little shits." You giggled and she let go of you, shaking her head as she moved to get served. There was no way you were telling her any more than that, but she seemed happy with what she'd got, her coffee order spilling out in a tumble of incoherent words.

Drinks obtained, you rushed into the pharmacy to get the medication that you were sure your three team members would need. You'd bought four black coffees and one tea earlier, shoving milk and sugar sachets into your bag as you didn't know if the others wanted any. Hange waited as you scurried towards her, hands full of drinks and tablets. An awkward dance of bags and your security pass occurred back in the building and you managed to gain entry without spilling anything. Walking to the lifts, your friend looked deep in thought and there was no doubt about what was on her mind. "I've come to a decision," she said quietly, aware of many other people around you. "I'm giving that a try." Wondering how Mike would react, you snorted laughter as you jabbed the floor button on the panel in the lift with your elbow, hands already full.

As you returned to the room, you had no option but to push the door open with your backside, sending it flying into the small space and leaving you stood in the doorway in a strange pose. All four men were there and as you turned, you saw three slightly red faced, hungover colleagues, all staring at you. Not surprising really, considering you had just greeted them with your ass. Levi tried to suppress a smile but spoke with a stony drawl. "You've been gone fucking ages. These three were starting to piss me off." The others cringed at the loudness of his words as you put down your acquired items, sorting them to be passed out to everyone. He wasn't finished talking though and his voice cut through the room. "Where's my fucking tea?" 

You pretended to be annoyed as you slid the hot drink towards him, careful not to spill it all over the web of cables on the desk. "Levi, I'm not your personal assistant, so give it a fucking rest." Grabbing his cup, he attempted not to smirk again as he saw the twinkle in your gaze, not ready to let you get away with it and win and he challenged you. 

"Or what?" Hangovers momentarily forgotten, three pairs of wide eyes looked between their two superiors as you gave out coffees and milk. Levi sat back in his chair, arms crossed and a steely glare fixed your way but you didn't rise to it, remaining emotionless and not looking up. 

"You don't want to know the answer to that." Delivering your thinly veiled threat, a small gasp sounded out. Poor Armin. He wasn't one for confrontation and was feeling wholly uncomfortable. Connie laughed loudly then gripped his pounding head in agony. Attention turned to him and you threw the painkillers across. He shot you a look of gratitude and took two before he spoke, passing them on to an equally relieved Marco. 

"You two are fucking weird. Funny though." Levi raised an brow and to the shaven headed man, eyes piercing into his widening orbs. "Sorry Levi, erm, Sir. I think I'm still drunk." He was flustered and his boss was clearly revelling in his discomfort as he kept molten eyes pinned on his prey. Leaning forward, Levi's chair creaked as his low voice sounded out. 

"Fucking light weight."

You snorted with sudden giggles, clapping an embarrassed hand over your mouth at the ridiculous noise you'd just made. Sheepish grins appeared on Connie and Marco's faces as the tablets were thrown over to Armin who was still in a state of shock and you decided to move things on. "Ok boys, enough playing around. Drink your coffee and learn how to hold your alcohol before you come out with me again." Grumbles sounded round the room and you sat down beside your man, turning full attention to your computer.

You were good with technology and had a sort of affinity with computers and software. In the past you'd dabbled in programming, even taken some basic courses and passed exams with flying colours. The skills you possessed were hardly at expert levels, but the notion of it appealed to your inner nerd. As you worked, the sound of your phone buzzing with a message broke through and you peeked at it from where it sat in your bag. Hange. "You got any handcuffs I could borrow?" Almost spitting out your coffee, you styled it out into a cough.

~~~~~~

The project was a couple of weeks into it's life and it was going well. The team got on brilliantly together and even Levi joined in with his usual air of indifference and insults. You'd all been out for a drink again, but it was much more reserved than last time, no hangovers or regrets. It was Friday and you were unlocking your apartment door when Erwin appeared from his home.

"Hey (F/N), you ok?" Smiling, you nodded and turned to the tall male. 

"All good thanks, you?" He shrugged and you saw a look on his face that seemed like tiredness mixed with sorrow. It hurt you to see him look so deflated and his voice was strained as he answered. 

"I've been better, to be honest. But you don't want to hear about my shit." Sensing his reticence about the subject, you didn't press it. Instead, you offered him a break. 

"Erwin, I own a bar near here. Why don't you pop in later, drinks on the house?" He looked surprised, but quickly began to smile. 

"That sounds good actually. Thank you." You gave him the details and watched as he walked away. Hoping that whatever was worrying him would be ok, you stepped inside to get changed out of your work clothes and into your usual dark jeans and a jumper.

The bar was busy tonight, end of a working week being good enough reason to celebrate and as you walked in, you saw Annie grinning widely, leaning over the counter to speak with a large, blonde man. It wasn't Erwin and you wondered who she was getting her claws into now. Walking over, you shot her a look which she barely acknowledged, totally enraptured by the stocky figure before her. Eventually she tore her gaze from him and he turned to introduce himself.

"Hi, I'm Erwin's friend, Reiner." Shaking his huge hand, you thought you recognised that name. It came flooding back as you recalled the short phone conversation that had taken place to arrange Jean's fate. Reiner was bulky like his companion and had a permanent frown despite his smile. "I hope you don't mind, but he told me about your place and I wanted to come and say hello." Winking at Annie, he growled his next words. "And meet the staff." You thought your friend would melt into a puddle there and then and you smiled at her wide eyes.

A figure materialised at your side and you turned to see Levi, clad in a perfectly fitting black v neck top and simple jeans. He radiated confidence as the large man next to you introduced himself. Shaking hands and nodding curtly, they exchanged a look of mutual respect as Erwin also appeared. Annie looked guilty, like she had been caught cheating and shuffled up to lean over to you, hissing her words. "Holy shit (F/N), you reckon they'd go for a threesome?" She sounded so sincere, it was hard to tell if she meant it or not as she cast her eyes over the two ex-military men, sizing up her options.

A few words were exchanged between the objects of her lust and Erwin turned to you. "Can we have a moment of your time, (F/N)?" Annie looked livid, knowing full well you had no interest in them but still unable to stop her jealousy. Drinks in hand, the four of you moved to the booth - most seats in here were empty as the majority of people were standing in groups, chatting and having fun. Your stomach jumped around like it was on the end of a piece of elastic as you wondered what they might need to speak to you about. The obvious topic would be Jean and your hands felt clammy as unease gripped you, tremors more pronounced than normal as you sat down. Levi was close, almost pressed against your body in an attempt to steady your nerves and Erwin broke the awkward silence.

"We would like to ask for your help." Not what you had been expecting. "My friend is having some problems and I think you might be able to solve them, given your skills in your day job." You remembered speaking to him at Christmas when he asked what you did for a living and how you had explained in a slightly over enthusiastic way about your love for technology. Either that or they were looking for investment advice, which you highly doubted. Staying quiet, you invited him to continue with your silence. It was Reiner who spoke up.

"My ex wife is trying to blackmail me. Trying to punish me out of some kind of fucking twisted, greedy spite." He gulped at his beer, face contorted in a sneer. "The divorce isn't final, it was going to be split down the middle, fifty fifty. No kids, clean cut." He took another long drink. "Now she has a file on me, pictures and shit all on her computer. Hired some pretentious slimy prick to spy on me, got information and evidence of me having an affair. We were already over, I'd moved out and she had a fucking boyfriend too. But I have no proof, so now she's using it to take almost everything. Use it as the reason for the marriage breaking down." Pausing, he clenched his large fists. "It was a short fling, meant little but it's going to fucking ruin me. She's emailing it all to her lawyer next Friday if I don't agree to sign everything over to her by then. Either way, I'm screwed."

His words rang in your ears as your brain notched up a gear, thinking about how to help. You'd learnt quite a bit from those in your class, the type of things they wouldn't be including in the text books. There was a way, but it relied on her and the investigator doing what you wanted them to. And you only had a week. Levi could almost see your mind racing and he was well aware of your abilities with the new systems at work, but he had no idea if this was something you could do or how it was even possible - he only knew that you would try your best to pay back the men that had done so much.

Taking a deep breath and a mouthful of wine, you eventually spoke. "It can be done but I need to get her and the guy to open an email. Can you get their email addresses?" Nods in response. "And I need to know enough about them to make sure they click on the document. The investigator will be easier. Make it look like a new job. What kind of stuff would your ex open? What's she into?" Reiner thought about it. He knew it had to be something she would trust, so many spam emails were sent these days and no one with common sense clicked anything they didn't recognise as legitimate. It couldn't just be one of those 'Hey! You've won this lottery you didn't even enter!' messages. Brows furrowed, he came to a decision.

"She's a teacher. Something about that or similar." It gave you a base to start with and you nodded. 

"Get me the addresses and I'll start work on the links. I've never done this before." Looking at them gravely, you tried to convey your wariness; you didn't want to give false hope. "But I know the theory and I'll do my best." Erwin smiled and thanked you warmly. Reiner looked over with gratitude and you offered your own slightly weak grin. It should work, but it depended too much on things out of your control.

The two ex-marines left and returned to the counter and Annie, woman looking ecstatic and fawning all over them. Levi squeezed your leg and brought you out of your thoughts. "You think it'll work?" Considering his question, you took a drink and shrugged before answering. 

"Should do. We'll find out I guess." Aware that your mind was still ticking over, he remained quiet, watching you closely and taking note of every expression that crossed your face. Sighing, you faced your lover, eyes full of concern. "Levi, I need to do this for them. I have to go home and get started." He nodded, understanding your wish to reciprocate the favour. 

"I know, (F/N). Let's go."

You gave your farewells to friends and your new acquaintance and made the short journey home. The laptop was sitting on your coffee table and your eyes constantly flicked over to the snow globe, using it as a comfort and anchor when your thoughts became clouded. You'd be lying if you said you weren't excited by this whole situation, but you were worried too; despite only having just met Reiner, you knew you had to help. Looking up over your glasses, you saw Levi working on the cork of a wine bottle and smiled as he quickly opened it and poured you both a drink.

He sat next to you and looked at the screen, passing you a glass. "What the fuck is that?" he asked, a scowl on his face and a hand around your waist. You giggled, knowing his frayed relationship with technology and moved in closer to him, pointing at parts on the display. 

"Do you want the simple answer or the full one?" A hand waved in front of you, signalling that he wanted layman's terms. "It hinges on a couple of things," you began. "They need to open the link and see a real document, but they have to do it from the computer the files are stored on. I'll get an alert once they click it and then I'll be able to access their files. It's based on a code embedded in there that they can't see but will exploit their operating system." His frown became deeper. 

"And that's the fucking simple version?" Smiling, you nodded, pointing at the black window that was filled with plain white fonts. 

"That's the code, I just need to add the attachment for the link."

"Tch." Your smile widened at his disdain and looked over as the man's expression changed to became softer, full of fun. "Once you're done, you can leave those glasses on." You raised an eyebrow as he continued. "And take everything else off."

~~~~~~

Two days passed and you had everything set up, email addresses obtained the night before. The message had to be sent at a plausible hour, but also at a time when you presumed the private investigator would be at work and the wife at home. Smart phones would fuck this all up so you made sure the files were too big to be reasonably downloaded on a mobile device by most people.

You sat at work, Monday morning already here. Next to the two company laptops sat your personal one, screen open on something business related but a small window in the corner revealed your true intent.

Levi kept his eyes trained in your direction as he watched your hands wringing and how often you turned to refresh something on your computer. He could see the nerves kicking in and as much as he respected why you were doing this, he hoped you wouldn't let it get on top of you. The others in the room were apparently blissfully unaware, continuing with their work and chatting. Armin, however, had indeed noticed the change in your demeanour and kept his own close watch on you, building up the courage to check you were ok.

Thanks to some perhaps questionable stalking by Reiner over the weekend, you'd been reliably informed that the investigator would be in his shitty basement office around now and he seemed to work for all seven days of the week. As 11am ticked over on the clock in the bottom of the screen, your hands moved, quickly opening a black window with the familiar white writing. Scanning over the information quickly with a less than expert eye, you felt your hands go clammy as you hit a button. Sent. Now it was just a case of waiting.

Well aware of the time, Levi stiffened slightly in his seat and watched you almost wriggling with anticipation. As soon as the email was opened, you would need to be quick. He noticed one of the little shits in the room pushing across in his chair, looking like he was going to start talking to you. "Arlert." His voice cut over the chatter of Connie and Marco and Armin visibly jumped. "Go and get me a fucking tea." Bowing, the young man shot up and almost ran out of the room, just as something popped up on your screen.

You were oblivious to the short exchange between the two as the small notification let you know you were in. Your long letter pleading for the investigator's help had been opened and the document that was laced with lies and intrusive code had done it's job. Fingers moving fast, you began searching through the new window that had appeared, looking for Reiner's or his wife's name or initials, anything to tie a file to them. It was insanely easy to locate. "Braun." A few clicks later and it was gone. Checking the system you had accessed remotely, you removed it from the virtual recycling bin also and swiftly closed down your connection.

Sitting back, you sighed, adrenaline filled muscles twitching and heart racing. The other two were engrossed in something so you glanced at Levi over your glasses and gave him a small, tight smile. He nodded once and returned to his papers. It was a stark contrast to how you operated, all digital and here he was with half a tree in front of him. Suppressing the need to giggle nervously from all the pent up stress, you decided to stretch instead, relieving your aching muscles. You really wanted to text Erwin and Reiner, but had purposefully not exchanged numbers, keeping it all off the grid. It made you feel like some kind of genius that should be holed up in a dark room surrounded by flashing screens and empty take away boxes. How different the reality was, you thought and gazed around your plush environment.

Armin returned with some hot drinks and you wondered when he'd left, so intent on your task that you never saw him go. You thanked him for the coffee and breathed in the warm, rich scent that seemed stronger than usual. It was like your senses were heightened, everything was bright and no fuzzy edges appeared to remind you of how much wine you'd drunk last night. Staring over at Levi, you wondered what this animal rush would do to you in the heat of the moment and your stomach flipped with lust. Trying to keep it together, you reminded yourself it wasn't over. The wife still had to be dealt with this afternoon after school finished. This one would be harder as you couldn't be sure she would even open her computer let alone her emails and then you would have to rely on her opening the attachment, trust that the files were stored on that same machine. There were too many variables and you had to send it at the optimum time. Nerves crept in again as you tried to concentrate for a few hours.

Four. The clock flipped round to tell you the time. She would be home soon and if habits remained, some work would be done before she began to relax for the evening.

Six past four. Still too soon. Could've been traffic and she might be refreshing her emails on her phone whilst stuck in a snarl up of cars.

Eleven past four. Your heart was trying to escape from your chest and your hands shook from their position under the table, a mixture of anxiety and the need to drink something strong.

Four sixteen. Time to go. Grey eyes tracked your every move as you proceeded to follow the same steps as before, sending the hastily plagiarized curriculum document that was relevant to the woman's teaching group. The first email had been sent from an account you'd created on Saturday, no name linked and false identity given. This one was from another new persona and you hoped it looked relatively professional.

Four twenty eight. Rubbing your wrist, you jiggled your right leg up and down to try to expel the knotted ball of fear and excitement in your stomach.

Quarter to five. It was killing you now and you thought maybe you'd missed your chance. Absent mindedly you waved goodbye to the three men who were leaving for the day and tried not to scream with frustration. Levi's hands fell on your shoulders from behind as he moved his fingers to massage the tight knots, trying to ease your tension but he didn't speak.

Four fifty eight. Notification. Yelping, you shot forward as you were advised that the document was open and you had access. This system was more sparse than the last, folders of photos and music but not much else. Navigating to the one named 'documents', you found a sub folder called 'fuck face'. Snorting with borderline hysterical laughter, you opened it quickly to ensure it was the right one. Of course it was. Pictures taken from behind trees of Reiner and his girlfriend shone out at you along with a list of times and dates. Click. Delete. Gone. Recycle bin, delete file, gone.

Quickly you shut down the connection and removed anything related to this from your own computer and closed it, powering down. The adrenaline high kicked in once more and you jumped up, hugging Levi tightly, not able to stop moving around as you hopped from foot to foot. "Alright calm down, you look like you have to go piss, (F/N)." Cackling laughter, you released him, (e/c) eyes flashing.

"Can we go now?" Your lover looked at you with a raised brow and replied quietly. 

"Why the rush?" Trying not to bounce on the spot, you gathered your things. 

"Levi, don't question it. Just let it happen." Aware of your behaviour, a small smirk played on his lips as he picked up his phone and keys. 

"Exactly what is going to happen?" he asked with an amused tone.

As you turned to him, your face was serious but your gaze was alive with something he had never seen before and when you spoke, it sent shivers down his spine. "Oh you have no idea Levi, but I guarantee you'll like it."


	15. Highs And Lows

You couldn't breathe, move or see. The high from before still rushed strongly as you lay on your back, holding any breath in your chest. You'd had your turn and now it was Levi's and he was enjoying every minute of the sweet torture he was inflicting upon you, just as you'd revelled in making him squirm before. His fingers brushed gently in random places across your body, almost not there at all and every time his touch ghosted on flesh, he felt you jump and saw your arms pull at the soft but tight restraints. The fact that you couldn't see because of the fabric over your eyes made it easier for him to tease you with the anticipation of where he would appear next.

The amount of trust between you was an unspoken bond, knowing that to place yourself in this position was a testament to your love and faith in each other. You felt a slight sting as teeth nipped at your inner thigh and gasped at the intensity, moaning his name softly. "I thought I said no talking?" Levi scolded playfully and you bit your lip hard. You felt his fingers at your mouth and he told you off once more. "No, no (F/N). That's for me to do." Releasing your grip on your almost bleeding pout, you waited for what would come next, body buzzing and begging to be taken.

The way your wrists were bound together at the wooden headboard meant that you could be turned without having to be untied and you heard your next command. "Up on your knees. Hands on the wood." Obeying in silence, you flipped over and gripped the headboard tightly, pulling yourself up to kneel on the bed. Levi sat back behind you, admiring your form and relishing the fact that you were enjoying this as much as he was. "Up." Something tapped your stomach and you straightened your back and thighs, ass in the air.

Hearing a noise, you felt something connect with your buttocks and groaned with pleasure as the leather belt slapped across waiting skin. It was hard enough to leave a mark, but not so that it would hurt for anything more than a few minutes. "That was for talking." The man in control smirked and knew that the two of you had been teasing each other for too long. It was hard for him to keep his cool and judging by the way you moved impatiently on the bed, it was just as difficult for his woman.

You wanted to speak, but had been ordered to remain silent - you longed to beg, plead for him to fuck you, however kept calm, knowing it wouldn't be long now as you heard the tone of his voice change. "Fucking hell." Pictures in your mind flashed as you imagined him sitting looking at you, bent over in front of him in submission, eyes probably focussed between your legs. The throbbing you felt down there was unbelievable as the last hour of touches, bites and teasing built up to an insane need. "You really are fucking amazing." His voice was getting closer. "I can't hold on anymore." Closer still and you felt a hand on the small of your back along with a familiar hardness pressing against you. His next words were spoken right in your ear, tickling with whispers. "I'm giving you permission to speak. Do you want me?" Without hesitation you began babbling. 

"Yes Levi, please, I need you, please, fuck...take me, please." You felt his smile against your lobe as he spoke again.

"I fucking love it when you're begging. Good girl." A hand gripped your hair, pulling your head back and you almost cried in relief when you felt him enter you from behind, pumping in with hard but slow movements. He felt incredible inside of you, his large member hitting your sweet spot expertly and a hand moved round to hold your body, grasp on (h/c) locks disappearing as fingers slid down to rub your clit in slow circles. Gripping onto the headboard, your nails dug into the wood as you called out his name and he increased the pace, a string of expletives rushing out of his mouth.

It was all about the anticipation for the two of you and it usually ended in the fast, hard sex that you both loved so much. Levi's hands were on your hips now as he thrust into you with immense speed and depth, breath quick as he stared down at your soft curves and the mark he'd left on your ass. It nearly tipped him over the edge there and then and he tried to keep himself under control.

You felt a build up of lust in your core and threw your head up, back arching down as you angled yourself to try and make him go deeper still. "Levi, fuck. Harder. I'm…." It was all you could manage as shivers raced through your body, his grip increasing as he dug his fingers into your flesh, bruising skin. The sensation of pain sent harsh shockwaves of passion flying throughout your soul and you came, hard and explosively with a shout that turned into a moan as your nerves tingled with satisfaction. 

"Fuck, (F/N)…fuck yes…" You heard Levi groan as he pushed into you, your name chanting from his mouth loudly as he released inside of you, bringing his head down to rest panting on your back.

Slowly, he withdrew and carefully untied your restraints and removed your blindfold. You turned and looked into his half-lidded eyes with complete enjoyment written all over your face. "Levi, I fucking love you." He smirked and pulled you in to a steamy kiss. Sitting back, he looked over your body with admiration. 

"Love you too, filthy brat."

Once you'd sorted yourselves out, you realised you still hadn't told the guys about the successful deletion of files and remembered you were due to meet in the bar. An hour ago. Levi had gone home to get some fresh clothes and it was already nearly 7.30. You grabbed your stuff and sat on the arm of the couch with a cigarette, waiting for him to get back so you could run down to meet the large men and you smiled. Who would have thought deleting a couple of things would have that effect on you?

Annie leant over the counter to speak with her new two favourite people as you and Levi rushed through the door not long after, an apologetic look on your face. "I'm so sorry, we lost track of time." Erwin grinned and replied. 

"No need to apologise. I went home first to shower and change after work." He moved closer, impressive eyebrows raised. "I heard that you two were otherwise engaged." Your eyes widened, realisation sinking in about the obvious fact that you lived next door to him. Reiner laughed loudly and Annie smirked at your now purple face. 

"Tch."

All eyes turned to Levi as he stared straight ahead at the bottles and optics behind the bar, aiming his words at the blonde serving. "I told you she was fucking loud." Snorts of laughter sounded as your blush got even hotter, shooting daggers sideways with your gaze, but it was soon your time to laugh as Erwin spoke once more. 

"Sorry Levi, I didn't say it was (F/N) I heard." Steely orbs flashed as he turned slowly to your grinning neighbour. 

"Fuck off Erwin." His stare returned to the alcohol as the larger man retorted. 

"No, it wasn't fuck OFF…" The emphasis on the last word was hilarious and he affected a look of deep thought as you remembered the shouted swearing.

A snarl curled across Levi's lips as he turned once more and settled his gaze on your giggling form, hissing lowly. "What the fuck are you laughing for?" Spreading your arms out in a shrug, you couldn't help it even if it was at your expense somewhat and your lover frowned, brows knitted together as he waved his hand at Annie to get a drink. She stuck her tongue out but complied all the same, now used to his asshole moments.

"So, anyway." You tried to regain your composure. "It's done." Reiner stared and Erwin smiled at his friend as the former spoke in shock. 

"What, already?" Nodding, you took your drink from the counter and gulped deeply. 

"Yep. It was easier than I thought, actually. Although I can't help you with the fallout." He grinned evily. 

"Oh I can deal with that, no problem. It's going to be fun." The other woman's eyes clouded over and you could sense her internal struggle over the two men.

You'd all spent an hour together, drinking and chatting until the high of your previous adrenaline rush came crashing down and you experienced the low exhaustion of being so tightly wound up all day. Levi noted your slumped shoulders and weary eyes and placed an arm around your waist. "Finally worn off?" He was fully aware of what had been coursing strongly through your veins earlier and nodding in defeat, you looked up at him like a lost child and pouted. Hiding a smirk, he located his belongings as you both said your goodbyes.

Lying in bed, you curled up in the sheets, utterly shattered. Your phone buzzed and you flapped around to find it, bringing the harsh light of the screen to your face to see a text from the pale man. He'd gone home to make sure you got a full night's sleep, not trusting himself to keep his hands off you but he didn't admit that, simply told you he had housework to do, making you laugh at the image you had of him with a feather duster in one hand and a drink in the other.

His message was simple, but a reminder of a few months prior. "Sleep well, (F/N)." Smiling, you wished him the same and tried to become one with the soft pillows, sleep creeping in like a comfort blanket until you were dragged unceremoniously from your slumber by noises from next door. Faint banging and pieces of words filtered through, along with a light giggle and you rolled your eyes. Annie. You wondered if it was just Erwin in there with her or if she'd gotten her wish. Sticking the sheets over your head, you hummed a tune to try and drown out the increasingly sexual noises from the adjoining apartment and no longer felt sorry that your neighbour had heard you earlier. Unable to sleep with the sounds ringing in your ears, you grabbed your phone and sent a message to Levi.

'Turns out these walls are quite thin after all. Annie's next door. Can't sleep. My brain's bleeding.' It didn't take long for a reply to come through.

'Dirty old man.' And then another. 'Is it turning you on?' Now who was the dirty one? You sent a quick response. 

'Fuck off, no. It's disturbing me. I feel violated.' The noises suggested that whoever was in there was getting ready to finish already and you heard a small shout as your phone alerted you once more.

'Only I'm allowed to violate you. Put your fucking fingers in your ears.' Laughing quietly, you tapped away as the shouts increased, then thankfully subsided. 

'No need. It's all over.'

~~~~~~

Friday arrived, cold and wet. Biting rain pelted your umbrella as you ran across town, surrounded by similarly drenched people that evening. Your boots splashed through puddles, sending droplets of water up the back of your black jeans and you sped up, eventually making it to the bar just as the wind picked up and threatened to steal the umbrella from you. Standing dripping in the doorway, you shook yourself down and removed the hood from your head, hair at least still dry. Hange and Mike were on the stools at the counter, with Annie and Ymir serving. Eren was at home, a bad case of man flu rendering him incapable of anything but sniffing and being waited on by his girlfriend.

Your blonde friend had of course been sent a message at bastard o'clock Tuesday morning and you hoped it had woken her up. It requested that things remain bit quieter next time and her reply a few hours later explained that she was sorry, but not really. She also confirmed that it had only been Erwin however she was working on Reiner to get him involved. Regardless of what was going on, you were glad deep down that she was happy and you trusted your neighbour.

Ymir had been off all week and returning today, taking some rare holiday time to spend with Historia. The small woman had cut her trip short, back from overseas only two months into the volunteer work, seemingly unable to stay away from her girlfriend. Either that or her jealousy took hold a bit too strong but nevertheless, your friend was overjoyed and you didn't question it.

As you approached them, Mike was on his way out for a cigarette and he scowled at you. It surprised you, really only barely knowing each other and you wondered what was wrong. Before you could open your mouth, he stopped and pointed. "Not only did I hear some things I wish I hadn't at Christmas, she tried to tie me up the other day! And I'm pretty sure I know who to blame." Ok, so that cleared one thing up, but why did he presume the second? The man sniffed deeply then strode out and you hurried up to Hange to tell her what happened. She shook her head, looking a bit upset.

"Oh (F/N), I wanted to but he just wasn't up for it. Guess I'll have to think of something else." Frowning, you took your coat off and hung it from one of the hooks under the surface of the wooden bar. 

"Why is he accusing me of putting the thought in your head?" She looked blankly into your stern gaze. 

"Because I told him?" Rolling your eyes in defeat, you ran your hands down the back of your legs to attempt to dry the splash marks that adorned them and sighed. 

"Nothing like keeping a secret, Hange." She only laughed in response, as if it was the funniest thing ever. Mentally brushing it off, you stood and looked over at Annie. She gave you a thumbs up and a massive grin and it was hard not to reciprocate. Everyone seemed happy, apart from maybe Mike and you sat down to enjoy another evening with your somewhat horny group of friends. 

Levi appeared at your side, hand on your thigh as he stared over. "What's that fucking dopey grin for?" Shaking your head, you turned to reply. 

"They all look content. It's nice." He clicked his tongue and dragged a stool over, jumping up and sitting so that you were almost pressed together. 

"You're too soft," he grumbled, looking totally disinterested in the whole situation, but his eyes said that he wouldn't have you any other way. Mike returned, still glaring, until him and Hange were all over each other, little whispers and kisses like they were the only ones there. Ymir shot a comment at them as she swept past. 

"No one wants to see it." Laughing hard at their shocked faces, it seemed like such a serene moment in contrast to the raging storm outside.

The evening wore on and you were nicely intoxicated, not drunk, just warm and calm and you sat looking out over the thinning crowds, watching people have fun and enjoy themselves for the most part. A group of younger men stood singing near the front, arms around each other. Some women sat huddled at a table, one of them crying as the others tried to console her. Two older gents stood at the bar, not speaking, just drinking steadily. You recognised them from your father's funeral and they had been quiet then too. Looking to your right, you saw Hange smiling drunkenly up at Mike as he swayed lightly on his stool. To your left, Levi stared out as you did, observing and sipping his wine.

The doors opened and a figure approached. He was grinning and made his way over. "(F/N), she is so fucking pissed." Reiner's odd frowning smile looked down on you with glee and your lover turned to listen. "She can't prove it was anything to do with me but she's convinced it was my fault. Divorce is finalising Monday and she's got fuck all to wave in front of my face now. Thank you." You smiled warmly. 

"My pleasure, Reiner." He caught Annie's eye and she moved to get him a beer, yet another addition to the serene happiness that seemed to have drifted down.

~~~~~~

Peeling your eyes open, you chanced a peek at the clock. 5.11am, a veritable lie-in. Monday morning was here again, all too soon. The sound of running water came from the bathroom as Levi showered; he'd brought some things so he didn't have to trail back to his apartment in the morning. Groaning, you dragged yourself out of bed and to the cabinet, snatching two pain killers and leaving the packet on the sink for the man in the cubicle. You shuffled to the kitchen and drank your tablets down with water, flicking the kettle on for some life saving caffeine. By the time the male had finished washing, his tea was brewing and you jumped into the shower after him.

The water soothed your bones as the medicine kicked in and you silently cursed yourself for opening that other bottle of wine last night. Dried, you hastily applied your usual make up and pulled on underwear and tights. Picking out a warm black dress, you pulled it over your head and slipped your plain heels on. You'd be taking a cab to work so you didn't have to worry about them getting wet in the rain that had been hammering down since Friday.

You threw yourself onto the couch dramatically and lit a cigarette, a slight gag in your throat as you dragged on it. Levi brought the hot drinks over and slumped next to you. "I feel like shit, (F/N)," he mumbled as you laid your head on his shoulder, moaning in agreement. He looked fine, as did you, only the internal pain that laid within you both was a sign of the heavy night. But each of you always found it hard to stop once you'd started, addictive personalities taking over.

As the taxi pulled up at the office, the dark haired man didn't move, rubbing his head and groaning. "Shit. I've left my phone in your kitchen." Throwing him the keys, you made a note to get him his own one one cut. It seemed the sensible option, he was always at yours anyway and you ran for the building as he told the driver to take him on the short round trip.

You were the first one in the room and stood staring out the window watching rain cause havoc to people's morning commutes. The door slammed shut and made you jump, sending your head spinning with dizziness. Levi looked furious and he waved a piece of paper at you. "What the fuck is this?" Being that the letter was flapping around in his hand, you couldn't see a thing so grabbed it off him, thinking how he must've picked it up from the top of the pile of mail you'd left on the end of the kitchen counter. Slight annoyance crept over you at the thought of his snooping but as you looked down, you realised why he was mad. It was from another company, inviting you to an interview.

"Levi, I don't know anything about them. It says they heard about my work and reading between the lines, they're trying to poach me. But I'm not interested." He paced towards you, centimetres away, face full of anger as he growled in response. 

"Then why the fuck did you keep it?" Now you were fully pissed off, having to defend yourself over nothing. 

"Because I couldn't be fucked to throw the whole pile of junk mail in the recycle bin yet. What the fuck?" He sneered, lips curled in a grimace before replying.

"I fucking doubt that, (F/N). What is it? You fed up of being around me so much?" Insecurity. That's what this was about and it wasn't an emotion you'd seen on him since he discovered Farlan and Isabel had left. Treading carefully, you tried to think about your words before speaking but anger took over, headache and nausea rendering any sense of patience obsolete. 

"Levi, you know that's not true. Don't act so fucking stupid." His eyes flashed almost white, own hangover denying good natured discussions. 

"Stupid? How am I being stupid, you little shit?" You stared each other down, dispensing with words and your heart pounded harshly inside your rib cage as breaths came out audibly. In a split second you both closed the gap, kissing passionately and deeply as your hands knotted through raven hair and his grip grabbed hold of your ass. It was an angry embrace, fuelled fantastically by the argument and heated exchange. Neither of you heard the door open, but you both certainly heard it close. Wet lips broke apart and you stood staring at one another in the silence, hands still on each other's bodies. Levi tutted, his gaze piercing into your wide eyes with mischief and he spun, striding to the exit and not giving Armin a second look whilst muttering loudly. "Messed my fucking hair up, fuck sakes." And he was gone, leaving you standing red faced in front of the scared looking young man.

The blonde's expression changed once you were alone and he smiled lightly. "I knew already, (F/N). I guessed." Seeing your slight shock, he continued. "I am quite astute, you know." Of course he was. "I won't say anything, that's not the kind of person I am." Breathing with relief, you looked over at him. 

"Thank you Armin, I know." He'd brought drinks and set about placing them at the seats that everyone habitually sat in every day as he spoke quietly once more. 

"Are you happy?" The kind hearted man looked up and met your gaze as you grinned widely.

"Unbelievably so. Yes." He nodded, content with your answer. 

"I'm glad. You deserve it." Before you could give him a hug, Levi returned, looking exactly the same as he did before but had no doubt been sorting his always perfect hair in the bathroom mirrors. Work began in earnest and it was not long before the other two arrived, bouncing in with oblivious enthusiasm.

The morning was almost over and apart from a few glances, your partner didn't speak with you. An email popped up from Hange and you opened it, short message asking if you wanted to meet for lunch today and you replied quickly with an affirmative, telling her you needed to pop to a store first. Ten past one had been agreed and you were going to the new cafe that'd opened just next to your building. 

As the time to leave approached, you picked up your things, telling the room in general that you were meeting your friend. Marco and Connie stood too. "We're going to the pub for lunch," said the freckled man. "Anyone else?" Levi grunted and Armin smiled as he shook his head. 

"Fair enough," added Connie. "See you guys later." As the three of you left the room, you shot them a warning. 

"Be careful, I know how bad you are at handling your drink." Good natured banter accompanied the ride to the ground floor and you pulled out your umbrella to battle with the elements.

Back in the office, the meek and kind male cleared his throat. "Sir?" The older of the pair sat unmoving and didn't look up as he spoke in a measured voice. 

"Don't even fucking think about it." He knew the little runt was going to try to talk about feelings or something and cut him off before he could speak.

You ran into the shoesmith's, a cacophony of machinery noises and strong smells hitting your senses. Taking your key from its place on the metal ring, you handed it over and the man expertly duplicated it in mere seconds. Paying him with thanks, you wondered how there ever came to be a place where you could get a boot re-heeled and a key cut at the same time. Rain beat down on your dark umbrella as you rushed to the meeting place, dodging puddles with skill.

As you entered, you looked around at the buzzing premises. It was more like a deli, a huge queue forming for take-out sandwiches and salads but they also offered table service. A counter full of meats and mixed fillings sat to to the right and the seating area to the left, small wicker table sets giving the illusion of being somewhere warm and continental. Hange was sitting waving and you swayed round the other diners, taking care to keep from dripping rain on them. She grinned as you flopped down, peeling off your coat and trying to regain some kind of look that wasn't akin to a drowned rat. Your friend was beaming and you thought back to Friday and how her and Mike had been.

"So Hange, what's the deal? Why are you so loved up all of a sudden?" She looked off with dewy eyes, almost wistfully. Sighing, she cast her gaze back to you as the waiter handed you spotless menus. 

"Oh (F/N), it's amazing. We're talking about marriage and everything." Her face was lit up and you felt a surge of joy. "I know we haven't been together that long, but..." Trailing off, she had the same far away look and you smiled. 

"Hange, you don't need to worry about that. If you know, you know." She nodded and grinned, until she looked at you properly and a frown came over her features, asking what was wrong. It had been a ridiculous argument earlier but you were still brooding over it as you told her what happened. 

"What a little prick," she hissed. "Sounds like it ended ok though? Apart from Armin interrupting you." Her playful voice lightened your heart and you began to forget about it all, putting it down to a hangover mixed with slightly misplaced good intentions.

~~~~~~

You walked home, rain taking a break from drenching the metropolis and a mist hung around the city, spilling up from the river that ran through it. Levi remained silent by your side as you made your way up in the lift to your floor. Standing at the threshold, you didn't move and a grumpy voice sounded out in the hallway. "Are you going to open it?" Reaching into your bag, you fished out the item and handed it to him. 

"I thought you could use your key." Delicate fingers took it and he looked down at the simple gesture that lay in his hand. It made perfect sense, but nonetheless it was a significant gift. His face softened and he unlocked the door.

Walking in, you kicked your shoes off and hung up your coat, making your way to the kitchen to pull out the standard glasses and a bottle. Arms clad now in only shirt sleeves wrapped around your waist from behind and a chin rested on your left shoulder. "I'm sorry, (F/N)." You turned into his embrace and sighed. 

"Don't be, Levi. We're both very stubborn and passionate people. These things happen." He appeared to be bolstered somewhat by your short speech and took your lips into a soft kiss. Pulling back, he smiled slightly as he spoke. 

"Thank you for my key." His sincerity was clear, but his expression became strange, a mix of pretend boredom and a twinge of nerves. "I'm never at my apartment anymore. But it's too small here for both of us." It was subtle and slightly derogatory towards your home, but you knew him so well to understand what he was getting at. In a round about, nonchalant way, he'd suggested getting a place together.

A wide grin crept over your face as you answered and you saw him stifle a larger smile than the tiny smirk that pulled at his lips. "Is that so?" You squeezed into him and pressed your lips against his mouth. No more words were needed and you moved over to cuddle up on the sofa together, unspoken plans running through your minds.

~~~~~~

It was just past five on Tuesday evening and only you and Levi remained at work. A text sprung up on your phone from Ymir, asking for help at the bar. Eren was still in a world of sneezes and fevers and it was one of Annie's non-working days so you replied to let her know you'd be there soon, telling your lover you had to go in tonight. His response was to push a stack of papers your way.

You frowned down at them as he watched you with narrow eyes. So this was why he actually had a laptop in front of him all day? Before you on the table laid printed information on a selection of apartments, hand picked and vetted by him first from estate agent's websites for you to choose from. Grinning over, you saw him tilt his head slightly as if to say 'you're welcome'. It must have taken him all day to navigate through the internet and find these. "I'll look at them at the bar?" He nodded at your suggestion, knowing it would be relatively quiet tonight.

Standard black outfit in place, you stood gazing down at the papers two hours later, flicking through the options. Ymir was taking a break and Levi had just arrived, taking his place on a stool at the counter. "So what do you think?" His finger trailed across the packs lazily, stopping on one that you presumed he favoured. It happened to be the one you liked the best, too; near where you lived now, keeping your circle of home, work and the bar intact. The price made you a bit nervous, even though you could afford it on your wage alone, however it seemed expensive compared to your modest lifestyle. But it was lovely, you had to admit.

"I like this one, but do we really need a balcony?" A hand waved your concern away as you passed a bottle and glass across to him. 

"It'll be nice in the summer." You couldn't argue with that and he seemed dead set on going to see this one, so you agreed to go and view it tomorrow.

By half eleven, no one else remained and you decided to get tidying. You and Ymir were stacking the dishwashers out the back, door propped open by a broom. Levi had popped to the bathroom and a noise made you look up and walk back into the main area. Stopping in your tracks, you looked over at the person standing stock still before you. An almost manic grin adorned his features and your gaze cast further down, noting the hands that hung by his side. They were missing their middle and little fingers. Your stomach turned, not out of disgust, it took a lot more to shock you, but out of fear. It hadn't worked and here he was, back again.

"Go away, Jean." His leer widened at your cracked voice, knowing he was intimidating you and your ex took a few steps forwards, making you instinctively take some back just as Ymir appeared behind you with a gasp. Jean closed the gap, stalking up like a predator, grimace never slipping. In slow motion, you saw Levi burst from the bathroom door, heading towards the crazed intruder, heard your friend shout and then you noticed something now gleaming in Jean's hand.

Without a single thought in your head other than protecting those around, you lunged forward to grab the dark object in his hand, hoping his lack of a full set of digits would act against him. Reaching out, you tried to knock the gun from his grip and it seemed like you were moving through mud, feet not going fast enough.

You felt cold metal briefly under your fingers and heard a shot ring out before the room went black.


	16. Three Weeks

Something cold and hard pressed against your back as you struggled to open your eyes. Unbelievable pain darted through your head as you rolled over on the floor, eyes widening as you saw Levi pinning down Jean, his hands wrapped around your ex boyfriend's neck. The faint sound of Ymir shouting crept into your ears and you stumbled up to crawl over to the two men.

Jean's face was red as he clawed with futility at the tight grip on his throat, your lover's expression emotionless save for the fire in his eyes as he almost effortlessly squeezed the life out of the man under him. Pulling yourself up, you placed a shaking hand on Levi's arm and spoke softly, unable to hide fear beneath the calm facade. "Don't Levi. That's not who you are anymore." You knew he could kill him and the look on his features told you he was going to do just that unless you did something first. "Levi." Something in your voice made him hesitate and he looked down at the bastard below, the man that had hurt and terrorised you. However it was he himself that now made you afraid, something he never wanted to do and he hated the sound in your words as you lay slumped next to him. Hands releasing slowly, he sat back on his heels, gaze never moving as he watched Jean gasping and choking for breath.

You collapsed sideways, holding yourself up with a weak palm on the floor as your head spun with sickening throbs of bright white pain. Ymir was quiet and the only sound was that of your would-be attacker fighting to regain himself. Your ex assessed his options, looking up at the man who he didn't doubt would have carried on if you hadn't have stopped it, seeing the hatred and murderous intent in his steely glare and the sound of real fear in your voice told him that you didn't doubt it either. He decided to stop, stop everything and raised his deformed hands in submission before speaking with a rasp.

"Ok, (F/N), I give up. You win." An incredulous expression crossed your face and you leant over with effort so he could see you. Panting your words out, you spoke with complete malice. 

"Jean, it's not about winning. It's about not being fucking crazy and moving the fuck on." 

"I know (F/N). I will. I promise. Just…keep him away from me." Fully intending to stay true to his word, he looked up at Levi with wide eyes, begging to be let go. "I promise, that's it. I'll leave." The shorter male stood suddenly, never moving his stare from the wide orbs looking up as he heard the familiar emotion of a genuinely scared man. Jean took it as a cue and slowly picked himself up, remaining fingers tracing over his red neck.

"If you come near us again, I will kill you." Levi's voice was low as he spat his warning, unusually not adding any swearing to emphasise his point - he didn't need to, the tone he used was enough. The taller of the two believed the threat whole heartedly and backed away slowly to the door, too slowly for your man's liking so he twitched as if making to step forwards again and Jean turned, running out into the quiet city. The dark haired man walked over to lock the door and Ymir rushed to your side, down on the floor in seconds.

Pain shot through you again and you moaned over to her. "What the fuck happened?" Levi was now by your other side, hand reaching up to your head. When he brought it back down, you saw blood on his fingers and winced as if it hurt more now that the red, sticky substance could be seen. He was the one that filled you in. 

"That fucking dick fired a shot into the wall. He couldn't hold on to it properly so he hit you with it instead. Fell out of his shitty hand and went fucking sliding over there." Glancing across, you saw a small hole in the bricks and the gun on the floor below it. Luckily, the streets were pretty deserted and no one seemed to have heard a thing. Hanging your head, you apologised to the two beside you. 

"I'm sorry, I just saw it and wanted to get it off him." Two people shook their heads at you and Ymir stroked your hair as she tried to soothe you with a soft voice.

"Don't be sorry, (F/N). You just did what you had to." Levi didn't seem as impressed and stayed silent, eyes dark as the woman helped you up, head feeling like it was splitting into a hundred pieces. Before you could stumble, strong pale hands gripped you tight and Ymir ran to turn all the lights off. She looked over at the item on the floor and spoke. "I'll take care of that." Surprise washed over you, wondering what the hell she was going to do with a gun, but you said nothing as she gathered it up in a bar towel and shoved it in her bag, passing another cloth to Levi which he pressed to your head.

Hissing in breath at the sensation, you looked up and found dull grey eyes gazing on you. No sign of anything lay within his stare and you thought how pissed off he must be at you for trying to disarm Jean. Ymir locked up and gave you a hug before disappearing quickly down the street to do god knows what with the weapon. Levi led you home, holding you up and leaving you to keep pressure on the wound. There was no one around to notice a bloodied human and you soon arrived at your apartment, letting him unlock the door. He sat you on the couch and, for the second time in your relationship, went to find the first aid kit.

You felt full of guilt at your actions, convinced that you'd acted hastily and got yourself injured in the process. Your lover was upset with you and that was what hurt the most, more than your head, but you had to try something, surely? Couldn't just have left Jean to get the upper hand?

Levi returned with the medical supplies, two short glasses and a bottle of scotch from the kitchen; this was definitely a situation that required more than wine. He worked silently to clean you up and tended to your injury carefully with strips to seal the cut. As porcelain fingers gently went through the process, he felt a deep remorse at what he'd done - he'd scared you. And himself, if truth be told. If you hadn't come round quickly and spoken, he would have killed Jean and he had no doubt about that in his mind. His actions were based on the need to protect, like yours had been, but his was an animalistic reaction that he didn't think he'd ever be feeling again.

Finished, he looked at the lump forming on your upper forehead and turned to fill the glasses. You took yours gratefully, gulping it down with shaking hands. Levi sat looking to the floor, unable to meet your gaze anymore and you swallowed with trepidation before you spoke. "Levi, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have tried to…" Your words were stopped with a small kiss and the silvery hues that now stared at you were full of regret and slight surprise. 

"(F/N), why are you sorry? You're not the one who went full fucking psycho." So he wasn't pissed off at you, but himself. You let him continue, aware that there was more to say. "I saw the fear in your eyes and I caused that." He shook his head. "I don't want to make you scared, I'm supposed to fucking protect you." Throwing the dark drink down his throat, he poured two more and when he was done, you grasped his hands, making sure your voice was level. 

"Levi, you did protect me. And I don't want you to beat yourself up about it." Sighing, you tightened your hold on him. "This was my shitty past that came flying in and threatened all of us, not yours. But I'm infinitely thankful that you were there for me." He still looked disgusted with his actions and you wondered what you could possibly say to lighten his thunderous mood as he tilted his face down again behind shining strands of black hair. "Levi?" He glanced up as you spoke softly. "I love you. And remember, the future is what matters. Our future. Not the past." Your face was full of warmth and words sincere and he shook his head at how incredible the woman who sat next to him was. He wrapped his arms around you and held tight, breathing in the scent of your shampoo, still lingering despite it being past midnight. 

"I love you too," he murmured. "So fucking much."

~~~~~~

Both of you had actually slept until around 8am the next morning and were in no rush to get up; the guys at work would get on with what they needed to and the world wouldn't end. Lying together, you enjoyed the warmth of the body next to you and the comfort he gave. Delicate hands brushed your hair back from your face and you smiled at the soft sensation, totally relaxed. Levi's voice broke the silence. "Guess we'd better get ready." Groaning, you pushed yourself up, head pounding as you trailed off to shower. Just as the water reached its optimum temperature, you stepped in but couldn't shut the door. A hand was blocking it and another person walked in to join you, closing the generous sized cubicle ans a lustful look on his face. "We're already late. An extra half hour won't hurt."

It was nearly half past ten by the time you reached the office, neither of you caring what the others would say. The thirty minutes had turned into nearly an hour of teasing that started in the shower but quickly moved on to the bedroom, culminating in one of the strongest, loudest orgasms of your life. Judging by Levi's reaction, it was the same intensity for him too and it had left you both buzzing with passion. You'd placed a plaster over your head injury, ready to explain it off with a story about a rowdy customer from last night. Walking towards the door, the company director suddenly stopped you and looked into your eyes. "I forgot to say, we have that viewing tonight at seven." Excitement rushed through your stomach and you squeezed his hand tightly as he spoke again. "Our future." Hanging back for a moment longer, you saw a mischievous gleam in his orbs that usually meant someone was going to be in trouble.

He strode into the room, ignoring the questioning faces and you trotted in behind him to sit down. No one spoke and you had to suppress a smile as you could only imagine what was running through their minds. Marco snapped out of it first and looked over. "What happened to your head?" Before you could answer, Levi spoke, completely deadpan.

"I fucked her too hard and she fell off the bed." Everyone, including you, turned open mouthed to stare at him and he kept his gaze down as he flicked through papers, sighing lightly as if he had just said the most boring thing in the world. You looked slowly to the others, their faces shocked but you could see Connie concentrating, probably trying to figure out the relevant positions and exact physics of it all. You decided enough was enough and tried to regain any kind of respect that you once had. 

"Ignore him, it's just wishful thinking." That earned you a raised brow from the still downward staring man and you rolled your eyes, delivering the cover story which consisted of a drunken brawl that ended with you getting caught in the cross fire by a bottle.

"Jesus (F/N), are you ok?" Marco was full of genuine concern but again, the man by your side answered for you. 

"Of course she fucking is, just needs to work on her balance." Connie sniggered and you scowled over again at the hair that hung in front of Levi's face, but not with any anger - it was his way of dealing with the events of yesterday as he didn't want to think about the reality, or even your fabricated version. His perverted one was much more palatable and it helped him disassociate himself from the pain you endured, as well as his own actions.

With a weary look on his face, the one in charge stood and marched out without meeting any gazes and as the door slammed shut, all attention turned to you. Busying yourself, you looked down at your laptop and began to type. It was just an email to Hange, however it made you look like you were engrossed. "I like Levi's story better," began Connie. "It's got a lot more potential." Marco rolled his eyes at the look on his friend's face and punched him in the arm playfully as he spoke. 

"Is that one in the wank bank for later then?"

You lost patience. "I'm still in the fucking room, you do know that, yes?" The two looked sheepish and muttered weak apologies. "And Connie, don't even think about jerking off based on that story." He smirked a bit but retained his downward gaze as the taller of the pair pretended to be reading something really interesting. The ever present filthy side of your personality decided to have some of your own fun and you tried not to smile as you continued. "Have you got any idea how hard I would have to be fucked to fall off a bed?" Everyone froze and you had forgotten Armin was even in the room. Must apologise to him later, you thought. It must be making him uncomfortable. The others had no answer, just ideas running through their minds so you pushed onwards. "No? No witty reply to that?" Connie knew he should keep his mouth shut, but he just couldn't help himself. 

"It would have to be really hard actually, thinking about it." He did look deep in thought as you tilted your head with a small, humorless smile.

"Connie?" He saw your expression and straightened. "Stop thinking about Levi fucking me, please?" You delivered it with such a sweet tone, but the annoyance was clear on your face and your timing was impeccable, words leaving your mouth just as the subject of discussion walked back in the room. Levi stopped, shot you a look that you knew meant he would be enjoying the next ten or so minutes and he turned to the bald man who was now sitting wide eyed in fear. 

"Springer. My office. Now." The one in trouble did the only thing he could think of and dragged his friend down with the sinking ship. 

"Marco was thinking about it too." The freckled male stared with a wide gape in disbelief which quickly turned to a frown as he was also ordered to the director's office.

As they filed out, you turned to Armin. "Sorry, I just didn't want them to think I was easily wound up." He smiled lightly and shook his head. 

"Believe me, (F/N), I've heard them say worse." You didn't doubt that and hit send on your email, asking Hange to meet you for lunch at twelve. Feeling his eyes on you still, you looked up to see a concerned face. "He hasn't hurt you, has he?" You were surprised; had he really believed Levi's story? He cut you off before you could respond. "I know he was joking, don't worry." Relaxing slightly, you waited for the rest. "But I know you weren't telling the truth either." Dammit. He was like a lie detector test in human form. 

"Armin, you're uncannily correct. All the time. But the truth is not something I want to go into, I'm afraid. Just know that he would never hurt me. Ok?" The young man nodded, satisfied with your response and you looked back to see Hange's confirmation of your lunch date.

Meanwhile, Levi sat behind his imposing desk staring up at the two men that stood in front of him, their eyes trained on shining shoes. He was on a roll, all of his anger and loathing from yesterday coming out in the dirty streak of evil that ran through him and it manifested in his next emotionless question. "Do you want to watch?" The others raised their heads, shock and confusion on their fearful faces. Sighing, he clarified. "Next time I fuck her. Do you want to watch?" Gazes widened at the blunt delivery of the man's query and Marco stuttered his quick reply. 

"N-no Sir, no!" It came out in a squeak and Connie shook his head in agreement, only meaning it for the most part.

"So why are you fucking thinking about it?" They had no response to that at first, but the shaven headed employee spoke eventually. 

"Well, you did kind of bring it up and it was difficult not to picture anything." Levi shook his head. The man really didn't think before he spoke, ever, even if he did have a valid point. He decided to finish this, now growing bored of the situation. 

"If I get even the slightest impression that your filthy fucking minds are thinking about (F/N) that way again, I will cut your fucking balls off myself. Am I clear?" Fervent nods confirmed that they were sufficiently scared and he left them with his punishment.

Your lover swept back in to the room you occupied and you wondered what he'd got the two friends doing. Almost reading your mind, he sat and grumbled to the remaining members of the team. "They're organising all the fucking papers in my office. Don't expect to see them again today." It could have been worse and you tried to imagine what he'd said to them.

By lunchtime, Hange sat waiting for you in the cafe at a table in the corner on your instructions. She looked confused enough as it was, let alone when she saw the plaster covering the lump on your skull. Not letting her speak, you sat and explained everything that had happened last night as her eyes widened. "Holy shit, are you ok? A fucking gun? What the…" She shook her head, trying to come to terms with it all and you let her digest the information, waiting patiently for her to speak again. "How's Levi?" There was an odd relationship between the two which seemed like hatred on his part, but they had known each other for so long and you knew he actually had a high tolerance level when it came to her. Not that he would admit it. 

You shrugged and told her about his little outbursts in the office earlier, how you thought it was his coping mechanism and she nodded with a light smile. "He is very protective of you, it's adorable if a little intense." Her smile widened as she finished her thoughts. "I wish I'd been there to see those guy's faces!" You grinned and told her what had followed, particularly Armin's concern.

She laughed loudly, drawing some attention from fellow diners and pointed at you. "You know what you should have said, (F/N)?" It was something you weren't sure you wanted to hear, but let her carry on regardless. "You should have said he only hurts you when you want him to!" Brows wiggling, she continued her snorting laughter and you imagined how broken that kind of statement would have made the timid blonde feel.

Your friend calmed down as your food arrived and you sat quietly eating. The peace was broken once more as Hange waved a slice of french bread at you. "You going back there after work?" Jean hadn't deterred you from the bar in the slightest, but you had other plans. 

"Not tonight, no. We're going to look at an apartment actually." Frowning, she tried to figure it out. 

"What's wrong with yours? I thought you liked it there?" You sat in silence, almost able to count down the seconds until it hit her and when it did, she screamed. That was it, you'd never be able to come back here again.

"Oh my god (F/N), that's just perfect!" Her hands were clasped together and she grinned widely, looking upon you like you were a cute little baby made of chocolate and filled with wishes. "So you two are like, real deal?" You rolled your eyes. 

"I thought that was pretty self evident by now, don't you think?" She waved away your ratty response and continued. 

"I've never seen him in a place where he would even consider settling down. You must be great in bed. If Mike dumps me, you think Levi would let me borrow you?" It was your turn to laugh as you expected nothing else from your friend.

~~~~~~

You stood in front of an imposing building, the glass doors gleaming and plants outside well cared for. It was a key card swipe entry, no codes and there was a concierge in the impressive entrance hall who let you in. Sofas sat around, but you weren't quite sure why anyone would want to spend a lot of time in the foyer.

The suffocating real estate agent met you by the lifts and started telling you about the on site gym, roof terrace and parking spaces. Levi would no doubt use the gym, but the others were quite lost on you both - you couldn't drive and he didn't have a car. The elevators were a bit over the top, all painted in mock antique gold and mirrors sat against the whole back wall. Reaching the correct floor, you walked down plush carpets and a nicely lit hall, the agent telling you how there were only four apartments per floor so you could keep to yourself with ease. You hoped it meant your privacy was a bit more intact than at your place.

The door was made of dark mahogany and you nearly gasped as you walked in. The same wood adorned the floors of the expansive open plan living area, large french windows shining light across the accommodation and opening to the balcony. Two exits led off, but you went to check out the kitchen first. It was to one side of the large room, a breakfast bar separating it from the lounge and had pristine fitted appliances and shining surfaces. The excited guide informed you it was all newly installed and the units certainly looked it.

One of the doors led off to a storage area which housed a washing machine, dryer, built in shoe rack and enough shelving to shove all the crap you didn't know what else to do with. Levi remained emotionless the whole time, but you were finding it hard to contain yourself. The second door led to the hall which was decked in the same wooden boards and you found the bathroom, a huge space which contained a large bath, separate shower cubicle and lovely black and white tiled floors. Next to it was the smaller but still ample bedroom with fitted wardrobes and a fluffy beige carpet.

The agent looked like was going to explode as he opened up dramatically to reveal the master bedroom. It had a large window on one side that came down quite low, nearly to the floor, giving views of the city including the river. The same carpet was in here and the closets spanned the length of one wall, including a built in vanity table with a mirror and lights that surrounded it like a hollywood make-up station. It was a massive room, plenty of space for a bed and furniture and you imagined some sort of seat near the window so you could sit and gaze out.

Levi muttered something to the other man as you mentally planned furnishings and you heard the main door closing. "Got him to leave us to it for a minute. I hate having people breathing down my fucking neck." You were glad as the guy had made you unable to look properly at your surroundings. Standing at the window, you stared out and your partner embraced you from behind. "So, what do you think?" You grinned and leant your head back. 

"It's fucking amazing, Levi." He smiled lightly and shook his head. 

"You've already made your mind up haven't you?" Was it that obvious?

As you both had a second look around, he stood in the middle of the living area and nodded. "So have I, (F/N). Let's take it."

~~~~~~~

Moving day was upon you already, two and a half weeks later on a Friday as the new apartment was vacant, no forward chain of sellers and purchasers existing to put a halt to the proceedings. Also, you and Levi were never ones to go into something half heartedly. Both of your places had been placed on the market and snapped up quickly due to their central location and well maintained interiors, however it felt weird that someone else would be living in your home and slowly you'd made a kind of peace with the thought.

Erwin came out to bid you farewell; you'd already caught up recently to discuss Jean, Annie and life in general and you had been pleased to hear that he was as into the relationship as she was. They seemed to be going strong, the couple still new but it sounded solid. It wasn't a real goodbye as you would be seeing each other regularly but it still felt sad to you, the soft element of your personality adding more emotion than was perhaps needed.

You gave the huge man a warm hug and thanked him for being a great neighbour and friend as he chuckled heartily. "(F/N), I'm going to see you tomorrow!" It was true, you would at the bar but it wasn't the same to your currently over sensitive nerves. 

"I know Erwin, but I've been here nearly four years and a lot has happened in that time. I'll be sad to see it go." He nodded and held you out to meet your gaze. 

"But it's a new start. And it's not like you're in for any surprises. Levi basically lived here anyway." You giggled and agreed - for nearly five months you'd spent more time with him than you had with anyone in your life, shared everything about yourselves, firstly mental and moving on more recently to physical. The events in your lives had added to the intense relationship and all of that made it utterly sensible and plausible to be buying a place together. There was no point in hanging around, why wait?

Erwin left for work and you went back inside, scanning the place for any forgotten items. Neither of you had been able to agree on whose couch or bed to take so you bought new ones, keeping the spare guest bed from yours for the second bedroom. You stared out of the window at the bleak weather, thinking how the end of January was not a good time to move, but you had to trust the removal company and let them package your items up with care.

Almost on cue, the buzzer sounded and the voice announced that the men were here to begin the process. Letting them in, you wondered how Levi was getting on and also what the rest of your small team thought about the fact that neither of you were in work that day. Well, Armin knew as you'd told him, but you could only guess what the other two were imagining. No more words had been spoken about the events of that Wednesday morning, but you were itching to know what had been discussed in the director's office. As the burly men entered your apartment, they set about discussing what they would take first and you reminded them that the couch and matching chairs, along with the large bed were staying. A company would be picking them up at some point to take them to be sold on.

You took the phone from your pocket and dialled Levi's number. He must have picked it up mid rant and you heard him shouting instructions with a vexed tone. "Not a good time, (F/N)." His voice sounded strained as you smiled to yourself, imagining his wrath at the probably perfectly good service his own removal men were providing. 

"Ok handsome. See you on the other side." As you hung up, you heard him start laying into them again and smiled wider.

An hour later, the contents of your apartment were gone and you stood gazing round at how small it looked with nothing inside. You were waiting for the cleaning company you'd contacted as you had no desire to do it all yourself. They would make the whole place pristine and give it a coat of paint, glossing over the nicotine stained patches that hung like yellow ghosts around where your pictures had been. Once they were finished, they would be handing your keys to the estate agents to pass onto the next owners, so this was the last time you would be here. A slight sorrow crept over you, but it was quickly replaced by the excitement of your new home and who you would share it with.

Stepping out into the damp afternoon air, you gave your building a last glance and walked off, the sun already saying its faint goodbyes from behind a cluster of dark clouds. You pulled your coat around you tightly and lit a cigarette, breathing in gratefully after the day of stress that had been encountered. A buzz tickled against your leg and you took the phone from your jeans pocket to see a message from Hange. 'Happy moving day! Don't forget to actually unpack some stuff in between all of the sex.' You laughed breathily and replied that you weren't animals and were quite capable of concentrating on one task. It was almost one hundred percent a lie, but you had no desire to enter into a dirty text conversation with her right now.

As you approached the new block, you flicked your cigarette into the street and pulled out the keycard you'd picked up yesterday, swiping it on the entrance panel. The concierge nodded with a smile in greeting and you waved back, grinning. Riding up in the ridiculous lift, you felt butterflies in your stomach as the purring recorded voice informed you that the eighth floor had been reached. Soft light bathed the halls and you jogged to your new front door, key in hand. The scene that met you took your breath away and you stood with a dumb look on your face as a figure clad in a tight t-shirt and black denims swept into the room.

"You coming in or what?" He had a glass of wine in his hand and you spotted a matching one on the breakfast bar for you. The living room was spotless, new couch and chairs sitting perfectly in their places, the coffee table precisely equidistant between them. On top sat your snow globe and you smiled as you closed the door, placing your boots carefully on the mat and hanging your coat on a shining metal peg on the wall.

There were boxes stacked in the kitchen, but the main room looked like you'd lived here forever. A small table with matching chairs sat between the kitchen and balcony - you recognised it from Levi's place, an impressive but simple set made from glass and metal. An empty vase sat in the middle of it, waiting for flowers and pictures hung on the walls, a mixture of those from both of your belongings and a long wooden chest of drawers lay along the wall near the main entrance. Some of your randomly collected items sat on top, along with the more sophisticated pieces that belonged to your man and the flat screen TV took up it's position at the far end of the chest, angled to face the sofa. Then you noticed a plush beige rug that lay under the collection of the couch set and coffee table, fluffy and decadent, inviting you to wriggle your toes in it.

"How the fuck…..?" You shook your head, hardly believing it was possible for him to have done all of this already and alone as Levi brought your drink over and kissed you softly. 

"Do I need to remind you that I am actually quite strong, (F/N)?" Clinking glasses together in a silent toast, you grinned. 

"No, not that. How long have you even been here? Maximum three hours?" He shrugged, sipping at his wine. 

"Actually, only about one. Those fucking dicks took too long unloading our stuff." An hour. In the space of sixty minutes, he'd created the semblance of home in at least one room and you hadn't even seen the rest.

He took your hand and led you to the couch. Sinking down, you remembered why you'd picked this one, cushions amazingly comfortable and you curled up in your usual position against him. "Thanks Levi, you're incredible." You used your glass of wine to gesture around the room as he replied. 

"Tch. I couldn't stand all the fucking boxes and mess. You can deal with the kitchen."

Midnight approached and you had successfully found a home for everything in your designated area, built-in wine rack full and cupboards neatly organised. The brightly coloured small appliances had been yours as you refused to part with the rather bright items like a red and brushed steel kettle and matching toaster. Lighting a cigarette, you picked up your wine and drank deeply with the satisfaction of a job well done.

Levi had been making an array of noises in the master bedroom and you wondered how he was getting on as it had now gone quiet. Before you could shout out to ask if he was ok, he walked into the room, staring down at his hands in disbelief. You saw a phone in his grip and your stomach dropped at his expression as he looked up into your eyes.

Three weeks. Nearly three weeks had gone by where nothing had crept into your lives but joy and it was going to come tumbling down again in the now familiar rain of despair that seemed to hound you both.

Shock and sorrow seeped from his grey orbs and you steeled yourself for what ever news he was about to deliver.


	17. Difficult Farewell

The apartment was silent, not a single noise reaching through the rooms as you stood holding tightly to Levi. His forehead was on your shoulder and strong arms hung limply by his side. No tears fell, but you felt his pain in every shaking breath that he took. You rubbed his back with your right hand, trying to soothe him and held onto the questions you had, like how and when it all happened.

The distraught man tried to squeeze his eyes shut and forget about the call he'd just received, the words that had shattered his world and stabbed deeply into his heart. But he couldn't forget. It was real, as real as the arms that were wrapped around him and as real as the phone that was still gripped in his trembling hand. Sighing heavily, he looked up into your (e/c) orbs and saw the concern that radiated from them. He shook his head slowly, not wanting to speak the sentence he'd already uttered ever again. Instead, he quietly explained with one word.

"Overdose." Regret sank into your features as you led him over to the sofa, sitting your lover down and passing him a drink. You knew there was much more to the story, there had to be and braced yourself for the whole explanation, a fervent resolve in your heart to remain strong for him. Levi hung his head, gulped down wine and sighed again, still trying to process the information. Deciding that he had to get it out swiftly like ripping off a band aid, he drew breath and spoke with urgency, hoping if he said it fast enough the reality would disappear and go away.

"From what they can tell for now, Farlan beat her and injected her forcibly, then fucking stuck more in himself, knowing that it was a lethal amount for both of them." He ran his hand through his hair quickly, a snarl now creeping over his face. "He fucking killed her, (F/N). He killed Isabel." The man who sat next to you was broken and filled with fury all at the same time and you did the only thing you could. Taking his glass, you placed it down gently and gathered his now weak body into you, gripping hard to try and provide some kind of solace in this wretched situation.

Hours may have passed, you had no idea as you held each other close and you let him weep quietly into your neck, stroking his hair and muttering nonsense. You felt useless, unable to make this better, make it all go away and thoughts turned to when Levi had comforted you in the past and you hoped that your presence would be as much of a help to him as his was to you. Finally, the shakes from his form subsided and he sat back, allowing you to wipe the tears from his face without protest. Gazing over, you saw a furious spark in his eyes that had begun to overtake the grief which previously dominated his emotions. You moved hair back from his face, taking away the few strands that had been stuck down to his wet cheeks and tried to look as strong as you could, tried to be his rock.

"Will you help me?" His voice made you jump slightly and you took his hands gently in yours. 

"Always, Levi. Anything you need." He nodded and you stood. Watching without really looking, he saw the familiar flash of scotch and glasses, an acknowledgement of the fact that you knew exactly what he needed right now. To most people this wouldn't be help, this would be downright dangerous behaviour, but you both recognised that the only hope of any sleep would be found at the bottom of a bottle.

~~~~~~

Dim light danced over the new bedroom as your eyes opened with reluctance. You hadn't got as drunk as Levi, but enough to know that you were going to get hit by a major headache any time now. As radiating pain seeped in, you raised a hand to press it to your forehead, casting your mind back to last night. No more tears were shed and hardly any words exchanged as the two of you knocked back shot after shot and chain smoked until your throats felt raw. When your man did speak, it had been in mumbled streams of hatred and self loathing, wishing he had tried harder to make his friend stay the last time he saw her and cursing the man he'd left to live.

There was no clock in here yet, but you guessed it was probably mid morning. You moved to get up to retrieve some water and tablets, but a gentle hand stopped you as it pressed against your back. "There's going to be an autopsy and investigation and I'm the only one around who will organise anything after that." Levi's voice sounded thick and you turned to see his red tinted eyes, a look of exhaustion all over his face. He'd probably been lying there for ages, maybe most of the night, thinking and waiting to talk to you. 

"I can do that," you said softly. You'd only organised your father's funeral recently and knew what needed to be done. Grey orbs looked at you with gratitude and you knew it would be alleviating some of his pain by taking control. "I just need to know who to contact, friends or family?" He laughed with a harshness that showed no emotion. 

"There's none of them. They didn't have anyone that I know of and even if they did, I'm sure they would have been total fuckers."

Nodding, you decided to place a notice in the local paper and also in the one where they had moved to, letting whoever wanted to come know of their passing. As it would probably be labelled a suicide on Farlan's part, a religious ceremony and burial would be impossible, but you felt that the usual readings by the priests were arranged out of habit, not through any beliefs. It was exactly what you had done, conforming to the norm despite being a true atheist. This all meant that you would most likely be contacting the same crematorium as before, however arranging a totally different service.

Levi watched your organised mind whirring and felt thankful beyond belief that you were by his side, his light at the end of the tunnel. "(F/N)?" You glanced up at the sound of your name coming in a croak from his mouth. "Thank you." Shaking your head, you moved over and ignored the pain behind your eyes as you placed your palm on his cheek. 

"You don't need to thank me, Levi. I love you and I want to protect you in any way that I can." He smiled ever so slightly and put his hand over yours. 

"I know (F/N)." You broke away to find the items you had meant to get earlier, shuffling through the unfamiliar hall. When you returned, you had a bottle of water under one arm, strip of painkillers between your teeth and hot drinks in each hand. Levi suppressed a smirk at your appearance and sighed instead. He was still fucking furious, but a kind of acceptance had started to settle in already - the fact that they had left him behind made it slightly easier to deal with the grief as they had become strangers in recent months, gone from his heart. As you climbed back into bed, he pulled you in to a strong hug, conveying thanks with the gesture.

Teeth had been brushed, showers taken and fresh clothes were now in place as you sat together on the couch, cuddling tightly. You'd sent a few texts to your friends to let them know you wouldn't be able to meet them tonight as arranged due to Levi's bereavement; it was too soon for him to be entertaining his quiet, brooding version of socialising. A call had also been made to the crematorium while he'd showered and you explained the unconventional situation to the patient man on the other end of the line. They were solemnly and slightly eerily happy to advise you that they accommodated for any form of death and you promised to contact them as soon as the legalities were taken care of. A few more calls and you discovered that unsurprisingly, neither Farlan nor Isabel had left a will, meaning that any money or belongings they did have would be placed into the hands of the government until such time that any surviving relative appeared.

You'd also sent some emails, contacting the local papers to post an obituary but not to publish until you confirmed the date of the funeral. Your efficiency scared you slightly at times, a clinical approach that allowed you to see process separate from emotion. But it was better this way, Levi wouldn't need to deal with any of it apart from the inevitable official calls. The police had obtained his number from Isabel's phone as it was the only one beside Farlan's that she'd saved in there and they would be contacting him again with the autopsy results, no doubt.

Deciding to take the additional strain of moving home away from your lover too, you kissed him gently and went to unpack clothes and fill the cupboards and drawers in the bedroom. It didn't take long, so you moved on to housing things like towels and bed linen in the guest room's storage. It was quite therapeutic, giving you a task that needed little thought process and you then began to nest toiletries into the built-in white cabinets that sat in the bathroom. The hoover was stashed in the utility cupboard, along with a mop, broom and ironing board. Spotting the racks, you went to bring the shoes through and set them in neat rows into the wooden shelving.

Flattened boxes sat by the door, ready to take them down to large recycling bins and you turned as a small noise sounded out. Levi was fast asleep on the couch, curled up like a vulnerable little boy, head pressed into the soft cushions. You smiled at his innocent look and carefully went to retrieve a warm blanket. Returning, you laid it over his slumbering body and placed a tiny kiss on his head, not wanting to wake him. He was out for the count and you imagined any kind of noise wouldn't rouse him. Happy that he was getting some well needed rest, you took up position on one of the large armchairs and lit a cigarette, taking your phone out to see if you had any messages.

Levi woke at around 7pm and felt the warmth of the blanket around him. He looked up with bleary eyes and saw you snoozing sideways on the chair, legs drawn up and arms hooked around them, your head hanging over your knees. As if you knew he was awake, you snapped your stare up and saw his tired face. You didn't remember falling asleep and were totally confused about what time and even what day it was. "Wha?" The perplexed sound that came from your mouth made him smirk and he lazily pushed himself up and made his way over, placing himself into the chair to hug you from behind. 

"It's Saturday evening and we're at home (F/N). My name is Levi and we have amazing sex. We work at…" Before he could continue with his patronising tone, you elbowed him in the stomach, making him exhale roughly. "Steady there jabby, I'm still fucking delicate." You muttered something along the lines of not being a smart ass and shuffled round to kiss his lips softly.

You managed to turn your whole body so you were now pressed into each other closely and you draped your legs over his. Carefully watching his features, you asked him how he was and saw brows furrow as he considered his answer. "I'm angry. Fucking angry. But I'm ok." He tilted his head slightly as he spoke again. "You said that you had already grieved for your father? When you knew he was going to die?" You nodded. "Well I think I know what you mean. When me and Farlan fought that night, I guess they both died in my eyes. I never expected to see them again." His words made sense and you hoped his main emotion of anger didn't get strong enough to eat away at him.

~~~~~~

It was Monday and you sat in the office, having ordered Levi to stay at home. It did worry you what he would be like alone though, wondering if the undercurrent of rage would surface. Conversely, he'd barely thought about your insistence, just complied - he didn't need the stress of the team on top of what was going on in his life and took your advice, opting for a day in front of whatever shit was on TV. Truth be told, he probably would rearrange all of his clothes that you'd put away; not that you'd done a bad job, but you hadn't done a Levi job.

Armin arrived not long after you, hot drinks as usual in a cardboard cup holder. He placed tea at the head of the table and looked over to you with confusion. "Sorry, he's not coming in today. Death in the family." Your man had already told you it was fine to let them know, but in no more detail than required and the blonde looked sorrowful, sitting quietly next to you. 

"Anything I can do to help?" He was unbelievably sweet and you wondered how he was single. Not your type, obviously, but he deserved the happiness of companionship with someone as lovely as him.

"Thank you, we're ok though." You spoke again with a sigh, knowing that the harshness of the funeral was yet to come. "It's an odd situation Armin, a horrible one." He nodded and asked for no more elaboration, placing a hand on your arm and spoke, aware of the strain on your face. 

"He has you to help him through it. And that's important." Smiling, you put your hand on his, thanking him for the kindness.

Connie and Marco burst in and the bald man grinned. "Ooh (F/N), better not let Levi catch you like that!" You shot him a look of pure hatred, not meaning for it to be so harsh, but you were not in the mood for joking and it was clear in your voice when you spoke curtly. 

"Fuck off." He looked visibly shaken as he took his seat and sipped at his coffee, grumbling. 

"It's ok when you guys want to make jokes." He was right admittedly, however this wasn't the place. 

"Sorry, Connie, but it's really not the best moment to be messing with me." He didn't look satisfied and opened his mouth to retaliate, but Armin cut him off.

"Just leave it, yea? She's having a hard time, so back off." Again, the older male didn't know when to stop and he shot another remark your way. 

"I bet she's having a really hard time. Emphasis on the hard." You snapped, everything you'd held in over the weekend rising to the surface. As you stood, three worried faces looked up while you spat your words and pointed directly at Connie. 

"Enough. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for friendly banter, but if someone tells you to leave it, you fucking leave it." Drawing breath, you continued, the addition of sadness in your tone. "Incase you hadn't noticed, Levi isn't here today. You know why? Because he just got some terrible news about two people close to him dying suddenly. And I've been going out of my fucking mind trying to keep him sane and make all the arrangements. So if you'd be so kind, let's just drop this, yea?"

Silence descended and they digested what you'd said. It pretty much confirmed that the two of you were together, yet not in the filthy exposé way that some of the room's occupants would have liked. Connie rubbed the back of his neck and Marco spoke first. "I'm sorry, (F/N). Is that why you were off on Friday?" It was a fair question and you just shook your head, sitting back down heavily, utterly defeated and exhausted. You were aware how tired you looked, but it was the least of your worries. The usually excitable and sometimes offensive of the group picked up on your body language, as well as the gravity of your previous words and felt terrible for pushing you so far. 

"Sorry, I should have left it (F/N). Buy you a drink after work?" Looking up, you shook your head with a smile. 

"Thank you Connie, but maybe another time?" He nodded and decided to offer again later in the week. 

Work began, a rather awkward atmosphere in the room and you tapped an email to Hange to ask her if she wanted to meet for lunch. She replied quickly, the notification popping up with an audible beep. 'Sure thing, usual place? How's Levi?' You answered honestly. 

'I don't know.'

At around half ten you excused yourself and made the short trip outside with your cigarettes and phone. You lit up, pressig the right buttons to call the man you'd left at home and he answered within two rings. "Hey, what's up?" The voice sounded like he hadn't a care in the world. 

"Just wanted to see how you were doing Levi." You heard shuffling and a bang. 

"I've put all my t-shirts in the right order." Smiling, you shook your head. Sounded like a standard day, so you pushed slightly. 

"Are you ok?" He knew what you'd been getting at and sighed. 

"I'm fine. Trust me." He seemed sincere and you decided to leave it at that, moving on to lighter hearted issues. 

"It's hell here today, Levi. I want to punch Connie." You could hear his smirk as he spoke in reply. 

"You and me both. Just fucking do it." Laughing, you felt a bit of relief at the lifted conversation despite feeling no malice towards the bald male at all. 

You met Hange later at the same cafe as before and the waiters gave her a look, remembering her raucous laughter the last time you were in here but there would be none of that today. She took your hand and squeezed it tightly, looking over the fatigue on your face. "What's happened, (F/N)?" You didn't go into full details, just that it was friends he had known for years and that they'd moved away suddenly and hadn't kept in touch. And now this news. Your friend's face was etched with sorrow as you told her the circumstances behind their death, knowing that Levi wouldn't mind. He was fully aware that you told her a lot, yet would stop short at going in to how he'd known them.

"Shit, that's just awful. That fucking dick." She was frowning, trying to make sense of it all, as were you and Levi. "So (F/N), I know you. How are you coping?" Smiling faintly, you looked up, glad to have her in your life. 

"I'm ok. Better than before. He seems to have accepted it, but I'm dreading the funeral. It all comes flooding back in that kind of intense setting." You rubbed your forehead. "I'm sorting it all out for him, he doesn't need to worry about all of that shit." Hange gave you a serious look. 

"Don't let it get on top of you. He needs you to be the strong one now." Nodding, you agreed, fully aware of the responsibility. You were glad you were there for him though and wouldn't have it any other way.

Eventually it was time to leave for the day and everyone packed up in silence. It had been fraught in the office and you felt bad, hating that you'd brought this cloud of gloom upon the team unintentionally. Before they could go, you cleared your throat to get their attention. Eyes turned to you, faces showing a mixture of sympathy and slight fear. That wasn't what you wanted to see - you were the cheery, approachable one in the office but you guessed even you had limits.

"Look, guys, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to drop a huge ton of crap on you. It's my fault and I apologise." Armin smiled and looked over at you with an openly friendly gaze. 

"No it's not your fault. It's an awful place to be in and I hope you're both alright." He managed to lighten your guilt expertly and you respected him so much more for his unending ways with humanity. Connie shuffled his feet and looked down. 

"Nah, it was me. I was a dick. Sorry." Not as eloquent a reply, but it was nice to hear all the same. Marco muttered an apology for your situation and offered you a smile. You thanked them all and left for the day together. On the way down, the shaven headed male leant over, smirk on his face. "So does that mean you're off the market then?" He made you laugh heartily and you silently appreciated him more for the relief - it had been his intention to try and cheer you up.

As you reached your front door, you heard a muffled voice from inside and entered quietly. Levi was on the phone pacing, just offering the odd affirmative to the conversation. He hung up with a terse goodbye and turned as you hung up your coat. "So it's official. Murder suicide. He even left a fucking note." You froze, goosebumps creeping all over your skin as you thought the worst, imagining a letter full of hatred for his brother's killer. When the low tone spoke again, it wasn't what you were expecting.

"It said that he couldn't stand that she'd found someone else. Their apartment was only lived in by Farlan, Isabel had moved out. There were fucking needles everywhere." He shook his head. "They think she'd only gone round to pick up some of her stuff when it happened. Fuck. Why didn't she call me before?" After she'd left Farlan, she could have contacted him, or you for that matter as the seemingly unconnected friendly stranger. Maybe the woman had been happy in her new relationship and wanted to start afresh. He would never know.

Walking towards one another, you pulled him into a warm embrace and he gripped you tightly. "At least she had some happiness." His voice sounded sad, but slightly accepting and you wondered how you were going to be able to contact the new boyfriend; his number wasn't even in her phone for the police to provide which was strange in itself, however you decided to dismiss that thought and carry on with your idea for an announcement in the paper. Bringing up an unwelcome but important question, you whispered in his ear. 

"When?" Without hesitation, Levi spoke. 

"As soon as possible." Nodding, you understood all too well the need for closure and began mentally making a list of things to do.

~~~~~~

You sat together in the office the next morning, having arranged a date of this Thursday for the funeral and the publication in the papers had been confirmed the evening before, leaving your number on the advert. Authorities were contacted this morning and Farlan's landlord informed - there had been some debt owing and it had come from the money the man still had in his bank account. That was all sorted out by the relevant people and you kept well away from the burden of taking on someone else's bad money management. Isabel's address had been located by the police and they arranged the necessary, also confirming to you that no other name was registered at the apartment.

You'd explained to Levi last night about what had happened in the office yesterday, apologising for pretty much outing your relationship. His reaction had been one of indifference and a comment around how they probably knew anyway.

Armin arrived first, drinks in hand as usual and he gave Levi a small sympathetic smile. The older man nodded, a silent show of empathy met with thanks running between them. Marco was the next to turn up and he just muttered an awkward greeting, not really sure how to offer condolences to his grumpy ass boss and he sat down, avoiding eye contact.

When Connie swept in he looked confident, his usual grinning face swapped for one of serious reflection. He didn't sit and everyone turned their gazes up to meet his strong one as the man spoke clearly and genuinely. "Levi, I'm sorry for your loss. And (F/N), again I'm sorry for being a prick. Can I make it up to everyone by getting the drinks in on Friday?" Levi wasn't sure what to do and all eyes now rested on his impassable, stony exterior. 

"Tch. Fuck it. Why not." Connie's usual smile crept over his features and the rest of you shared a smirk as the director looked back down to his work, seemingly unmoved by the whole exchange yet internally grateful to have people who weren't total idiots around him.

~~~~~~

Thursday morning arrived quickly and without mercy. The sun was out for once and you stood in the bedroom watching the birds flying around the city, using the updrafts to their advantage, soaring high above the buildings, free from all of this kind of pain and distress that humans had to suffer. Levi was grumbling behind you, trying to sort his tie, taking his mind off the day to come. It would be an early service, 11am and you both expected a seriously low turn out. The known attendees were him, you and Hange - she'd wanted to come to support him and even though he'd made a derogatory comment, you knew he was glad. No one had contacted you on the number from the announcements and you expected if anyone did turn up, they wouldn't speak to the three of you. You hadn't arranged a wake, but would be going to the bar afterwards. As the time to leave approached, you both pulled dark coats on and you took his arm gently, moving round to hug him fiercely, not speaking. No words would be sufficient.

You took a cab as there was no procession; the county coroner had delivered the caskets to the funeral home directly this morning on your instructions. Levi's instructions. As you arrived, the wind tugged at your coats, sun quickly disappearing behind clouds as if it knew what was about to happen. Hange stood outside, the only one present and she gave Levi a hug. Although he curled his lip into a sneer, you realised it was an instinctive reaction as he hugged her back tightly. The three of you walked into the tiny room, enough seating for maybe twenty people at best, light music playing from speakers as an official standing at the front nodded gravely to you all with a sombre face.

Taking your seats, you were aware of some movement behind you but you didn't turn, choosing to keep your eyes trained on the man who was speaking. He read a few short words, all about loss and eventual hope; basically a biblical sermon with the religious connotations removed and he then went on to deliver a speech based on the short conversation he'd held with Levi the day before. It was centred around how full of life Isabel was, the joy she brought and the fact that she was taken in her prime. No words were spoken about Farlan, other than to say he had been a good friend and like a brother. Past tense was definitely apt for this part.

The short and quite honestly strange service came to an end with both coffins moving one after the other into the flames that you knew hid behind the curtain, waiting to take them greedily and turn their remains to ash. You all rose and Levi turned to leave. Politeness kicking in, you thanked the officiating male warmly and hurried off to follow your lover. As you went, you noticed two other people, one of whom was quite evidently a homeless man, seeking shelter from the winds. Fair play to him, any port in a storm. The other was younger, disheveled and malnourished, but full of remorse. He caught your eye as you left the building and nodded. Slightly unsure of what to do, you just nodded back and carried on outside, presuming it was Isabel's boyfriend and a blatant drug addict if the way he chewed his inside cheek was anything to go by.

Levi stood looking out over the well kept grounds, cigarette in his hand. His face gave nothing away and you linked your fingers with his free hand as Hange appeared at his other side. Stamping out the smoke, he sighed. "I can't say anything more. They've fucking gone. But they were lost to me a while ago. Already dead." He seemed to consider his next words and the older woman linked her arm in his. Getting no protest, she left it there as he spoke. "Fuck it." It was his standard term, one that you had used in the past also, your usual signal to each other that it was ok, time to move on. "Let's go. Someone's watching us." You remained still at his words and thankfully so did Hange, not alerting whoever it was to your realisation.

As a trio, you walked to the bar in the same formation, one of Levi's hands held and one of his arms gripped. When you got there, Eren raised a hand and nodded to the bereaved man, a sign of respect and condolence. The one by your side nodded back and you all moved to your booth, a place you hadn't sat down at in a while and it felt like coming home. Eren rushed over with wine and glasses, none of you caring that it was only lunchtime and you sat together in silence.

The day turned into evening and Hange had tearfully and drunkenly dragged herself home, giving Levi a sloppy kiss on the cheek which he suffered well. Annie had come in to assist with the late shift, offering her own sympathies but with no physical contact. You either had to be dating him or friends with him for years to get away with that. He looked round, eyes fixed on yours and spoke quietly. "There's someone still here, staring at us. But I can't fucking see them. I don't like it, (F/N)." You nodded, having felt a gaze on you a few times during your time here. Whoever it was would have been at both the crematorium and at the bar and growing unease swept over you both, picking at nerves and chewing at your stomachs. 

In the end, no one approached the two of you and as you walked home arm in arm, you began to relax, both of you putting it down to the draining day you'd endured. Levi seemed ok, as ok as could be given the circumstances and you felt a weight lifting off you that had been there since Friday, hoping he felt it too.

Inside, you sat together on the couch, a reporter on the TV telling you all about the storm that would be hitting the city soon. Your lover had his head laid on your chest and you ran your fingers through raven hair, lightly brushing his scalp with your fingers in a soothing motion. He hummed and you angled your gaze to look down. "You keep doing that (F/N) and I'm going to fall asleep." He sounded like he was already half way there and you smiled at his contentment. 

"That's the idea, Levi. You need to rest." The man lying on you groaned, knowing you were right but not wanting to leave the warmth and feeling of your touch on him. You pushed him up, half assed protests coming from his mouth as you dragged him through to bed. Both of you had already changed into your respective nightwear earlier and it was now just a matter of crawling under the sheets to try to get some alcohol induced sleep.


	18. Know Your Enemy

It was Friday evening and true to his word, Connie was buying you all drinks in your bar. Levi had come to work today against your wishes, insisting he was fine and needed to get back. You respected that he wanted to return to normal, but kept a close eye on him. Right now, he was staring over at the bottles behind the counter, face as animated as a rock. The rest of you were having friendly conversations, trying to get him involved but he rarely commented. Seeing as the three men with you had found out about your relationship, all unintentionally, Levi didn't feel the need to keep his distance. Not that you had suddenly turned into a couple who were fond of public affection, but it meant he could sit closely next to you as always and not think twice about absent mindedly touching you or fiddling unconsciously with your hand as it lay on his thigh - even if they'd noticed, they weren't about to say anything.

Armin was smiling, the couple of drinks in his belly already warming his insides and flushing his cheeks into a rather cute pinkish tone. Marco was mid flow through a story about Connie at the Christmas party and how he was trying to seduce one of the women who worked on the floor above you all. He'd failed massively. "And then he looked into her eyes, ready to tell her some shit about how beautiful she was and threw up on her shoes!" Laughter sounded round the table and you even felt your lover twitch slightly as he stifled a smirk. As if to erase the fact it had happened, the man by your side stood to get the next round in.

Once he had gone far enough away, you pounced. "So guys, what happened in Levi's office that day?" Two guilty sets of eyes stared back at you, memories still raw of the awkward incident under their boss's evil glare. Images danced in their brains of you two together and they exchanged looks, trying to telepathically decide what to do. Sensing their reticence, you pressed further. "Come on, it can't be that bad?" It was a matter of principle with you now, curiosity eating away and Marco turned to check his superior was still occupied, quickly relaying what had gone on, causing Connie to blush and break eye contact with you. Once he'd finished, you sat in silence, playing over the scene in your head - it was fucking hilarious and you were sad to have missed it. Now you knew why Levi had presumed they had known about your relationship and you started laughing, eyes blurring with tears.

When he returned with the drinks, the man in question just sighed. "Fucking hell, now she'll never stop." That made you worse and the other three started to laugh too, more at you than the story. You felt a light slap on your thigh and turned to your right with giggles, steely eyes flashing which made you melt inside. It worked. He'd calmed you down instantly with one lust filled look and you mumbled an apology into your wine to everyone, hearing chuckles from the others.

~~~~~~

Two weeks had passed, thankfully without event. You still hadn't had an official house warming party, much to Hange's dismay, but you would sort it soon and currently stood in the bedroom thinking about plans as you got ready. This evening you and Levi were going out for dinner, something the two of you had surprisingly never done, usually leaving food to one side and concentrating on drink. Wanting to look your very best, you ran your hands over the dresses hanging in front of you and selected a pretty but practical one, given the weather outside. The promised storm was upon you, rain coming in waves, never hinting at when it would creep up and hit. It was dry right now, but that meant nothing - in minutes there could be a downpour, so your choice was based on this uncertainty.

Finally ready, you walked through to get some shoes from the cupboard and Levi stood watching you from the kitchen. His eyes looked across at your deep maroon coloured choice, the sleeves sitting perfectly down at your elbows and neck line curved in a low circle, chest slightly on display. Thick fabric clung to your curves and an almost imperceptible pattern was picked out across the garment in a slightly darker tone. The skirt flowed out in pleats and floated around your knees as you moved through the room. Your (h/c) locks were pinned in a messy up do and smokey eyes finished off the look - he failed to breathe, woman before him absolutely stunning and he couldn't tear his gaze away as you bent and slipped shiny leather heels on, black stockings gleaming.

Footwear in place, you turned and saw him for the first time since you'd walked into the room, a look of desire on his face. You smiled, taking in his own appearance, black shirt with two buttons open at the very top as he wore no tie, cloth tight against his toned body, leather bracelet visible as the sleeves were rolled up. Moving slowly towards him, you swayed with each step and wrapped your arms around his waist with a smirk. You placed a small kiss on his lips, breathing in the sumptuous cologne and drew back, staring into mesmerising grey orbs as he spoke. "I don't know if I can make it through dinner." Grabbing your ass, he tried to pull you inwards but you placed your hands on his chest, loving the feel of the hard physique under your touch.

"I didn't spend half an hour getting ready to stay in, Levi. Take a girl on a date?" He smiled lightly and shook his head, dark hair moving with the gesture.

"Ok (F/N), but I can't promise you that I'll last all night." Before you went to get your coat, you shot him a look and whispered. 

"You and me both know you can last all night."

The restaurant was beautiful, only a short cab ride away. It was lit dimly for ambience and the sounds of glasses touching combined with soft music filled your ears. Everything on the menu sounded delicious, making it hard to choose. Levi picked the wine, of course and you made your own quiet toast together. To your future. Light conversation filled the evening along with hands held over the table and fleeting glances. It was like you were on a first date and technically you were, never having done all of this traditional stuff together.

You paid the bill, leaving a good sized tip for the attentive but not oppressive waitress and walked with linked hands slowly down busy streets. The rain that threatened earlier had stayed away and you spotted a bar which had outside seating covered by a large dark green awning, metal umbrella-shaped machines giving out warmth to keep patrons cosy. Levi gestured with one hand, ladies first and you smiled as you picked a spot on a padded wicker couch. It was more relaxed than the restaurant but still had table service and within seconds a waiter was upon you to take orders.

Linking fingers with his, you turned to your man and looked over with a grin. "Thank you, this has been the perfect evening." He smiled slightly and stroked a finger up your cheek to tuck stray hair behind your ear. 

"No need to thank me, (F/N). The pleasure is all mine. And it's not over yet." Specks of silver lit up in his eyes and your stomach jumped in anticipation.

~~~~~~

"(F/N)? (F/N?) Oi!"

You were pulled from your thoughts of last night back into the reality of Saturday afternoon, finding yourself standing behind the counter at the bar facing Hange. She was clicking her fingers in front of you in an attempt to rouse you from whatever daydream you were caught up in.

"You're fucking living with him you know, you don't have to dream about it anymore." Her words filtered through and you smiled at how well she could read you, having spent nearly three years watching your expression cloud over with inappropriate thoughts of Levi. "So what's up? Why are you standing in a daze over shorty?" She waited impatiently for you to reply, gripping her hands together, hoping you wouldn't disappoint. But you did.

"It's nothing really. We went on a date." Your friend looked crushed, face dropping as if you'd just slapped her and she scowled. 

"What the fuck? (F/N)! That's no good!" You laughed and moved to take someone's order, expertly filling a glass with the perfect pint of beer. She shuffled up, ignoring the man who was waiting for his drink. "Is that it? Seriously? A fucking date?" Eyes darted over to her and you took the man's money as you apologised for the manic woman. 

"She doesn't get out that much." He smiled weakly and hurried away. "Hange, I can't have you scaring the customers off." She huffed and took a sip of lemonade; her and Mike had gotten pretty wasted last night and she was in a fragile state. 

"Well tell me the good stuff and I'll shut up!" Flashes of images flicked through your mind. Restraints, belts, fingers and leather digging into flesh with beautiful pain and the moment you were bound tightly and then gagged with a silk scarf, a new sensation to add to your list, all with the inclusion of unbelievable pleasure. There was no way you were telling her any of that, even you had to have self control sometimes when it came to your filthy discussions so you just shrugged and spoke over to her without emotion. 

"Honestly, you couldn't handle it."

It seemed to work rather well and she sat back, brain racing. That should keep her occupied, you thought and moved down the bar to serve the next customer. "Couldn't handle what?" Levi smirked across at you and your heart skipped in your chest as you smiled back sweetly, delivering your words as though they were covered in sugar. 

"Not being able to speak." His lip twitched and he bowed his head to hide a smile. Once composed, the pale man looked up, placing his palms flat on the counter in front of you and leaning in. 

"I wonder what else YOU could handle, (F/N)?" It was a question that sent your mind reeling and you laid your own slightly shaking hands on to the smooth wooden surface, closing the distance between the two of you and whispering. 

"Try me." Your eyes didn't break contact from one another's gaze as unvoiced thoughts ran across like radio waves.

"Oh give it a rest, I'm hungover." Hange had managed to drag her way over to you and heard the suggestive exchange. It was about all she could take after the thoughts she'd just been having and her cheeks were burning red. Levi turned to her, a sneer on his face. 

"Then don't fucking eavesdrop." She waved his words away, all three of you knowing full well she was incapable of keeping her nose out of your sex life.

"Anyway," you began. "What can I do for you, Sir?" Hange laid her head down on the counter and her voice came through in muffled words. 

"Don't set him off again (F/N), please? I thought I was the filthy one." You laughed and poured him a wine, well aware of what he would want and directed your parting comment at the brown hair slumped in front of you. 

"Hange, you don't even know the meaning of the word." Leaving them with that thought, you made your way out to collect empties.

Annie had arrived and you happily relinquished control to her. Erwin was here too, propped up on a stool that was really far too small for him and you were convinced it would break soon. Your hungover friend had gone earlier, unable to cope with the taunting you and Levi continued to put her through and you were now in your usual booth, chasing the tremors away glass by glass.

The feeling of being watched crept over you again as it had on the day of the funeral. Convinced you were going mad, you turned to see if you could spot whoever it was that looked at you. It was a horrible feeling, the sensation of being a small bug under the microscope sitting there to be spied upon, naked and defenceless. Just as your nerves were about to get the better of you, your lover stiffened beside you and someone approached.

He was a disgusting man, not necessarily in terms of dirty clothing but he just exuded filth, his weathered lips turning up into a wide grin of yellowed teeth and when he laughed, it came out in a crack like a gun shot; it had humour, but only in a dark form. You didn't dare look over at Levi, not wanting to see his features as you could feel the hatred radiating from him as the newcomer stood next to the table. He didn't sit, just remained there with the same grimace on his face.

The seated male set his glass down, shook his head once and motioned to the booth opposite. Whoever the man was, he looked a bit surprised at being invited to sit but did so all the same, stretching out into a pose that made him look right at home. Nothing happened for a few seconds, just a battle of stares and finally the oldest of your trio spoke, his voice rough and unfriendly.

"So Levi, I see your little friends died?" Not getting a response, he pushed further. "Ok, we'll play then. How are you? Keeping well?" Levi snorted a small laugh but remained tight lipped, almost wanting to press this guy to his limits. "No? Not that game? Alright, how about this one. I see you have a new place." That worked and the one challenged leant forward ever so slightly as his acquaintance continued. "And you know me, curiosity took hold so I checked the deeds, as is my right as a tax payer." Thin eyebrows raised above dark grey eyes at that statement and the rancid teeth of the other man appeared again.

"Too much? Yea, too much. Well anyway, I still checked them. And I was so pleased to see that you had a little partner in crime, so to speak." He pointed a calloused finger at you and Levi tilted over instinctively as a shield. "So aren't you going to introduce us? She looks like a lovely girl." Silence once more and the person opposite could hardly contain himself as he continued. "No need, Levi. Her name's on the paperwork. And I couldn't help but notice that it's the same first name as I heard recently." Now it was getting a bit weird and you held your breath without realising. "Sure, there may be loads of (F/N)'s around here, but none that seem to be shacked up with my nephew and none that have a rather large, muscular friend who they assisted recently." Now you knew who you were being spoken to by at least, but that made it so much worse.

A bony finger waved in your direction once more as he continued in his sarcastic tone. "He really is a nice man, that Mr Braun. Very chatty, especially after a few drinks. I was so lucky to have bumped into him in the pub up the road." You knew this conversation would not be ending well and anxiety pulled it's tight ropes around your stomach as you waited for the inevitable.

"He described you well, (F/N). Just how I had imagined. Well done by the way, Levi." The tension coming from the one sitting next to you was as thick as syrup, sliding out of his very soul in dense waves. "And I hear you're rather the expert with computers. It must be my lucky day, seeing as my lovely nephew owes me a favour." A grin pulled across his face in a grotesque expression that made your skin crawl and Levi shot forward with enough force to move the table.

"I don't owe you a fucking thing, Kenny. I paid you back, with interest. So you can piss off." The same barking laughter sounded out again, causing the older man to explode in fits of coughs and he took a minute to calm himself before continuing, wiping his now spit-covered lips with a disgusting handkerchief. 

"Oh, but you do. Both of you. That large friend of yours really does know how to talk and I know how to listen. I have quite the dirt on you." This was getting unbearable and you spoke in place of Levi.

"Blackmail is not the best way to get a favour, you know. And what exactly are you planning on doing with your information? Hmm? Not exactly concrete evidence is it? Just anecdotal drivel from a drunk man you only met that day." You'd had enough of this and if Kenny was anything like you'd been told, he was an opportunistic thug who now barely scraped through life and thought he was much more important than he actually was. Your outburst had earned you another hacking cough that passed as laughter, but Levi remained still, silently impressed with how you'd picked his threats apart in pretty much one breath. That was until his uncle delivered his next statement, icing on the cake.

"How does a witness to murder sound? Or the testimony of a man already incarcerated who has nothing to lose? So you can fuck your anecdotal drivel and do what I say." It was no longer about your now seemingly childish exploits, it was focussed firmly on Farlan's brother and his death. Levi groaned inwardly, showing nothing on his exterior - he had a feeling Kenny would somehow have known about that, he always fucking did. Now useless as a criminal, he had obviously honed his skills in knowing every single seedy and depraved thing that happened around here and manipulated it to his advantage.

Aware that there was only one way to end this conversation, the pale man growled across the table at his despicable uncle. "What do you fucking want?" He was answered with a shrug and a smile so innocent as if butter wouldn't melt, but his voice was still as dark and filled with slime as it had been before. 

"I need you to work your magic, (F/N). I have, shall we say, less than savoury people looking for me and I need you to make some things disappear."

Levi stood instantly and grabbed you up by his side as he pointed down at the piece of shit in front of him. "Not a fucking chance, Kenny. Fuck off." He turned to leave, dragging you with him but neither of you missed the parting words. 

"You've got until Tuesday to let me know. I trust you still have my number."

The world was seemingly not content with subjecting you both to everything life had slung at you already and now decided you needed to be placed in a position that felt impossible to get out of without some kind of catch. You walked home in silence, huddled beneath an umbrella in the driving rain, both thinking about what had just happened. From your point of view, doing what he wanted was the best option, however where did it end? Would that be you trapped as his little slave to do his dirty work? And, of course, he knew where you lived and would no doubt find you again if needs be. But the alternative was the possibility of Levi getting arrested and you weren't about to let that happen.

The man at your side was going through it all in his own head. He had no intention of letting you do this for Kenny as that would be opening the floodgates on a tidal wave of favours and it would be relentless. The other option was potentially being recognised as a murderer, even if it was in self defence and he felt trapped.

Entering your apartment, you noticed it was only nine o'clock. You were expecting it to have been nearer midnight as it had been a long and draining day.

~~~~~~

Both of you paced around your home, scotch and cigarettes in hand. It was already Tuesday and no course of action had been decided as yet. You'd both come straight here from work, as you had yesterday, stupidly thinking that being here would stop Kenny from coming anywhere near you. Deciding to break the silence, you downed the brown liquid and spoke. "I have to do it." He shook his head and pointed his drink at you. 

"No. You don't, (F/N). No." Levi went back to his small march and you stopped, staring over at him. 

"Well what then? You just want to let someone come forward as a witness to what you had to do? That's hardly the fucking sensible option." His movements ceased and he turned to speak to you, both staring each other down. 

"The only other way is to become his shitty little bitch. Once you do one thing, then that's it. He will never fucking leave you alone." You knew it was an impossible situation, yet you wanted so strongly to just get it done and remove any threat from the life of the man you loved and from yours.

Walking closer, you sighed, ready to try to reason with him and placed your empty glass on the table. "Listen, Levi..." You were cut off before you could continue, the sound of his voice sharp and unkind. 

"No (F/N), you listen. You are not doing it, end of fucking story." He came near, eyes full of rage. "You don't know him like I do." Hands on hips, you glared with annoyance, ready to explode. Something flashed across his face but you paid no attention. 

"So what Levi? Just sit here and let you get fucking arrested? No way. I'm doing it."

It was a childish move but you made it anyway, scooping his phone from the table and intending to send a text to Kenny; you were quick, but Levi was quicker and his hand gripped your wrist tightly, pulling it up next to your head so you were unable to do as intended and your stares locked in equal anger. It wasn't a situation that you could just kiss your way out of, like how it had transpired at work, no - this was much more serious and you both knew it. Still not letting go of the phone, you remained defiant and didn't move.

His hold on you increased in pressure, biting into your skin and your brain tried to tell your body that this was a good thing, a pleasurable thing and you realised that your perception to the sense of pain had been blurred. Mentally pushing the feeling aside, you became furious instead. Eventually, you couldn't hold onto his phone anymore and released your grasp, hearing it crash to the floor. Neither of you moved a muscle and you decided to end the heated confrontation. "So you're giving up? Ok, fine. But please know that I think it is the worst possible thing to do." He didn't respond, didn't let go of your wrist and something inside you snapped at his lack of reaction. "Fuck this." Ripping your arm from his hold, you grabbed your bag and shoes and left.

As you got outside, you saw that you hadn't thought this through. The rain beat down heavily and you had no coat, standing in the street in only your jeans and a t-shirt, the pair of Converse that were now on your feet getting quickly ruined. You were unaware of the downpour around you or the water drumming over your body, the sense of pure frustration and anger running so strongly that all other feelings were pushed aside, any sensations dulled to a tiny speck in your psyche. You couldn't actually believe he was going to leave this up to Kenny, leave him to do whatever it was he had planned and in a clouded state, you began to walk aimlessly.

Back inside, Levi stood for a moment, replaying the last few moments in his mind, hating himself more and more with every passing second. It didn't change his mind, however he should have realised what was going on earlier and explained everything to you instead of using force, but he'd been wound up so tightly that when you grabbed his phone, he'd seen red. He had no idea where you'd gone but grabbed his keys, shoving them in the back pocket of his jeans as he shrugged his coat on.

The street was deserted apart from passing cars and rivers ran down the road in spirals, rain water trying to find a way to nearby drains. Casting his gaze around, he found no sign of the woman who was so important to him, who was his everything and he cursed himself for being such a fucking prick. Choosing a direction, he made his way up the street, rain soaking through him with a cold, unrelenting rhythm.

Further up the road, you stopped by a dark, empty building, shivers running through your body which you barely noticed. A few people rushed around with a mixture of umbrellas or jackets pulled over their heads, some laughing as they attempted to avoid the weather. You stood watching, wondering what would happen next. Would Kenny contact you? Would the police? It didn't bear thinking about and you gave in to the spiralling despair that had taken over your recent fury. Heavily, you slumped to the ground, legs crouched and your back against the wall. No tears came, you weren't upset as such, it was more like the feeling of a spider being washed down a plug hole, unable to stop it no matter how hard you tried to cling to the smooth surface of normality.

As your thoughts darkened, you were unaware of an approaching figure until it knelt down in front of you. Looking up, your gaze was met by grey eyes that peered out from behind a sheet of dripping wet black hair and you felt icy hands take yours from where they sat on your knees. A twinge of anger returned and you stared coldly up at him. "Levi, what the hell are you doing?" You had to practically shout to be heard over the torrential rain and he raised his own voice to reply. 

"Finding you." As soon as he spoke, he realised it was a bad idea. Your frown grew deeper and you started to tell him exactly what you thought of his clever remark but he continued, cutting over you.

"(F/N), you have to trust me. I know what I'm doing." You got up quickly, droplets of water spraying from you to join their friends in the search for lower ground. Levi matched your action and you stood closely on the almost empty street, voices loud. 

"Explain then, because I'm having a hard time understanding what the fuck you're up to." He sighed and collected his thoughts before leaning closer so you could hear him.

"Kenny is full of bullshit. He's aware of what I did, but I doubt he's acquainted with anyone else who does or who would be willing to speak up about it even if they did fucking know." You stood silently waiting for the rest. "He's played us. Read a situation that could work to his advantage and used it. That's what he's fucking good at." As he spoke again, your fury increased. "Reiner will deny everything, or say he was drunk and made shit up. Jean sure as fuck wouldn't corroborate any stories and the police won't entertain my uncle any more. He's always trying to claim rewards for giving fucking information." Now you were livid.

"So why the flying fuck didn't you say any of this before? Why did you let me go fucking crazy for three days?" Your fists clenched as you nearly screamed at him and Levi answered you honestly with a tired tone. 

"I got so caught up in it, I didn't stop to think about what kind of man he really is. I believed his threats, just like I used to hang on his every word when I was younger." Remorse was painted all over his face as he continued. "It was just before you picked up my phone that I realised. And I should have told you this then, but it's a shameful thing to admit." Confused, you shook your head, wet hair slapping at your skin.

"Shameful?" Levi nodded and placed his hands on your cheeks, stroking them with feverish movements as if trying to make you understand more, his face pleading. 

"The reason I know what he's up to, how he's trying to use us is because that's what I would have done, (F/N). That's the kind of fucking man he made me." You leant in so you didn't have to shout, all wrath now washed away with the rain as you saw the pain that laid across his pale features. 

"Levi, no. You made yourself the man you are, not him. He's a worthless piece of shit that you've moved on from, he has no power over you anymore. You're not who you used to be." Making sure he was listening, you carried on. "You are a good man, Levi. My man. And I fucking love you."

You were pulled into a soft embrace, a kiss full of love and tenderness, much like the first one you shared only this time you were being drenched by the storm that battered the city and not snow. Neither of you noticed though as the rain fell heavily upon you, running down your faces and saturating your hair. Tongues brushed gently together as he placed his arms around you. Scooping yours around his neck, you pressed into him with a sigh, relief washing over you at his admission.

As he pulled back, Levi sucked your bottom lip lightly and you slowly opened your eyes. Silver flashed in his gaze and you could see normality creeping back in to him, heard warmth in his words as he spoke. "I love you. Never forget." Smiling, you squeezed him close and whispered in his ear. 

"I won't have to, Levi. You'll always be here to tell me." He nodded, speaking quietly. 

"I will (F/N), I will."

He moved his right arm around your shoulders to cuddle you sideways into his body and began to walk you back home, back to where it was dry and warm. Feeling your shivers, he pulled you in further, hurrying down the street. The concierge gave you both a funny look, but waved all the same as you left puddles through the foyer. Mirrors in the gaudy lift showed you what you both looked like, completely bedraggled and you began to laugh. "Tch." Trying to straighten himself out on the short ride up, Levi glared at your reflection. "Trust you to run off in the middle of a fucking storm." Smiling apologetically, you shrugged and made your way back to the apartment.

Once you were inside, he demanded that you stayed on the door mat while he carefully removed his shoes, socks, coat and jeans, keeping them in a neat pile next to you on the large brown piece of fabric that you were a prisoner on. He rushed to the smaller bedroom and retrieved some towels, throwing one over his head like a hood and bringing a large one out for you. Standing looking you up and down, he shook his head and pointed. "Out of those. I'm not having trails of dirty water in here." You peeled your wet clothes off until you were just in your underwear and the fluffy towel was thrown at you. Wrapping it tightly around your body, you went through to get completely undressed and into some pyjamas, rubbing your hair as you went.

After you'd dried off sufficiently, you got comfy on the couch, pulling the blanket over you. Levi brought over some wine and you lifted the cover to let him in. Curled up together, you began to apologise but he cut you off again, making you wonder if he always waited for you to speak before deciding what to say himself. "I should be the one apologising." He ran his fingers over your wrist, the one he had gripped so tightly before. Nothing more needed to be said as you nodded and cuddled into him.

After a few minutes, curiosity got the best of you and a question slipped out into the quiet room. "Will he contact us again?" Levi exhaled loudly and shrugged. 

"Without doubt, (F/N). But if we don't rise to his fucking games then it'll be ok." You believed him for the most part, yet there was a slight nagging at the back of your mind, a feeling that was compounded by his phone vibrating on the coffee table. As if he had been listening in to your conversation, Kenny was ringing.

Both of you sat up and you held your breath as he answered the call, sound level up high enough that you could hear the conversation even though the device was pressed against Levi's ear. The horrifically cracking voice filtered through, but it sounded annoyed instead of the previous commanding tone he'd possessed. "Not playing?" Your lover remained silent to wind his uncle up even more. "Come on, Levi." Eventually, he answered.

"No Kenny. Not fucking playing. You've got nothing and you know it." The other man stayed quiet this time and it was nearly a minute before he spoke again, voice wretched. 

"Fuck you. All I wanted was a favour." Smiling with malice, Levi left him with a parting statement before hanging up. 

"Ever heard of asking fucking nicely? Now leave us alone, you useless prick."

The way Kenny had sounded added gravitas to the theory and you began to feel safe once more.


	19. Unusual Normality

A few weeks had gone by with no more word from Kenny and you hoped he'd crawled back under his rock in self pity. The project was in it's third month and was producing the results that you'd been looking for, Armin's now expert reports providing the exec board with regular updates on progress, glitches and triumphs. Everyone felt the tension increasing over the past few days as you entered the final stages and you all understood the importance of what you were doing. Friendly banter still existed, but less frequently as it was overtaken by concentration and many cups of coffee.

You stared intently at your computer, mentally sizing it all up before glancing to the other one next to you and typing. The stress of the situation lay heavily on you, but as usual, you were the last to realise. Hange had been the one who took you to the side last year to inform you gently that the relationship with Jean was having a negative effect on your health. In the end, he'd forced your hand and you ended it, however the torment it put you through was unknown to somewhat until she spoke it out loud.

Levi watched his woman closely - he'd been in and out of meetings recently and had only just begun to notice your demeanour at work. Neither of you discussed the project at home, it stayed firmly in the office, but as he looked over at you now in the small room, worry gnawed at him. After all the two of you had been through, there was something happening, all because of a fucking job and your relentless desire to deliver the best.

It was currently lunchtime, the lovers remaining inside and he tried to remember the last time he'd seen you eating. Fingers trembled as they hung over the keyboard and your eyes were dark, but retained their sharp analytical gaze. Breakfast was always black coffee and if you ate lunch, you were doing it in secret. Levi recalled you had a small biscuit at some point yesterday, but that was it. You were going to sleep later and later but still waking at the same unearthly hours that he did and more often than not, he drifted off before you. One thing remained steady though; the way you acted, your personality along with your love and passion for him had been unchanged and if anything, had grown. You still watched the flakes in your snow globe regularly with a smile and showed no sign of fatigue or weakness in the bedroom. As if to solidify his thoughts, he instinctively reached up to touch his skin, feeling a comforting sting as he brushed against the small red crescent shapes he knew sat beneath his shirt. He swore your nails were sharper than usual last night.

Calculating it, he guessed you were getting a maximum of four hours sleep and you were definitely drinking more than usual. Only wine though, nothing stronger had been touched since the Tuesday deadline with his uncle, yet you didn't get drunk, not even close and it was like your tolerance was higher all of a sudden, which was strange given the lack of food. He made a mental note to take you straight home tonight and make you a meal, have a relaxing midweek night in.

~~~~~~

You watched Levi as he moved around the kitchen, skilled hands chopping and mixing, delicious scents invading your senses. Any offer of help was waved away with a strong instruction to stay on the couch so you did, drink in hand, gazing over at your busy partner. When cooking, you usually did it together so you wondered why he was ordering you to let him get on with it. You knew you were exhausted, so took the rest time gladly. Work was intense right now and you felt the effects of tiredness washing over you, head bobbing down as heavy lids closed against your will.

Levi asked a question and getting no response, he turned. Smiling at the sight that met him, he reduced the heat on the hob, gently simmering dinner. He stared over at the insanely cute form on the soft seat and thought how peaceful you looked, if a bit silly, sitting up on the sofa, chin on your chest and hair nearly in the wine that you still gripped tightly. Carefully he took the glass from you, placing it gently on the table and he pulled the blanket over to keep you warm.

After about twenty minutes, you snapped your head up and saw a figure sat next to you smirking. "Hungry?" You nodded and yawned, shuffling over to the dinner table that had been set with plates and cutlery. You ate ravenously, unaware of how starved you were until you started. It was amazing, a simple warming dish that suited the blustery March weather outside and once it was finished, you were rushed away back to the couch. Levi tidied and filled the dishwasher, light rumbles of the machine sounding out in the room as it did it's job.

He approached and motioned for you to sit forwards and he climbed in behind you, legs either side of yours as strong hands massaged at your shoulders and neck, relieving tight knots that sat across aching muscles. A moan of pure contentment escaped your lips and you closed your eyes as he moved down to concentrate on your back, finding every sore spot with ease and your head flopped forwards. Now totally relaxed, you felt yourself being picked up and placed by his side into a hug, eyes still shut and a smile on your face.

Levi stroked your hair in soft, hypnotic movements and you pulled in closely to him with a sigh. His voice mumbled softy as he continued to pay attention to the light touches he made across your head. "I'm worried about you, (F/N)." Frowning, you tried to sit up but he pulled you softly back down. "So is Hange and all the guys at work." It was true. Hange had approached him yesterday with her concerns and he saw the way your colleagues glanced at you with their own silent worry. You let him continue as you still felt like jelly from the wonderful pressure exerted on your tired body and had no energy left to interrupt him.

"You're not eating, hardly sleeping, you've got bags under your eyes that are fucking worse than mine." Laughing lightly, you thought about how his own dark circles were a permanent feature, not necessarily a result of fatigue, just his standard look. "I know you're stressed about work, but don't forget to look after yourself. Work is just work, you're way more fucking important." Sighing, you nodded and realised you had been a bit introverted recently, shouldering all the pressure and again, it took someone else to tell you that you were pushing too hard. Levi hadn't mentioned your alcohol intake, realising how much of a hypocrite that would have made him, so instead he placed his finger under your chin and lifted your head slowly. He gazed down into your tired eyes and placed a loving kiss on your lips, lingering a while as he tried to convey just how special you were to him.

As he broke away, he smiled and brushed his hand over your cheek. "You need to sleep, (F/N). A proper fucking sleep, no arguments." Pouting, you looked up at him with a questioning stare and the porcelain skinned man shook his head, knowing exactly what you were thinking. "Not tonight. You know we'll be up for hours." Trying to change his mind, you raised your eyebrows and whispered to him. 

"Even if we use the collar again?" Stifling a smirk, he remained stern, despite the fact he wanted nothing more right now than to place the leather item tightly around your neck and curl his finger through the shining metal ring that sat at the front of it.

Feeling like he was punishing you, but in a bad way, he shook his head again. "Don't get me wrong, I would fucking love to. But I'm more concerned about you having a full night's sleep than my own self gratification." You were sulking, a look of utter disappointment on your face but you knew he was right and actually doubted you had the energy to do anything more than crawl into bed. 

"Ok Levi, I know. I'm not happy about it, but I'll be good." He loved how childish you could be sometimes as it reminded him how fragile you were despite your strong exterior.

Turning the lights off, you trailed through to the bathroom to get ready. As teeth were brushed, you saw just how withdrawn you looked in the mirror and finally realised why he was so worried. Face washed and clothes in the hamper, you walked wearily to the bedroom to find your pyjamas. Levi watched your naked figure shuffling around and grit his teeth as images came flooding into his mind, the memory of you as he pulled the circular steel upwards, forcing you to link eyes with his.

Visibly shaking the thoughts away, he felt you press into his arms and you lay connected under the warm covers. Before you fell asleep, you realised that for the first time in years, you had gone to bed at a respectable hour, having only had one glass of wine, mind totally clear.

~~~~~~

No pain. No nausea or dizziness. No foul taste in your mouth. This was a strange feeling, one you were not accustomed to as you stretched out your legs. It was just past half four in the morning and you were still curled up in the same position you'd been last night, safely entwined with the man you loved so much. Levi was awake, also having his own thoughts about how it felt to get up without any trace of a hangover. It was quite unnerving and as he raised his hand to rub his eyes, it trembled. Your voice sounded out softly next to him. "That's the shitty part." Looking over, he saw your regretful face and watched as you raised your own arm, shakes harshly apparent. He heard you sigh as you flopped your limb back down and he squeezed tight.

"It was a good sleep though, (F/N). You can't argue with that." Levi was right. Again. It had been a night of solid, unbroken and natural rest and you were grateful for it, feeling a vague new lease of life running through you despite your trepidation at the way your body felt.

Armin noticed a stark change in your appearance and behaviour as you bounced into the office that morning, eyes still slightly dark but there was no puffiness to them today and you were smiling. He'd missed that expression and wondered what had happened to return the vivacious woman that you usually were. Even Levi looked different he thought, a spring in his step that probably no one else would notice. But he was proud of his skill that enabled him to pick up these minute details about things, especially people. It served him well. Perhaps the strangest thing was that his boss had brought hot drinks with him, something Armin usually went to get at around 8am.

"Thanks Levi," he said with a smile as the coffee was placed in front of him. A tut met his gratitude, followed by a gruff voice that sounded like it meant no offence at all. 

"Don't get fucking used to it." The older man left the room again, muttering about papers and Armin turned to the sprightly woman next to him. 

"(F/N) you look well," he truthfully admitted. "How are you feeling? It's been hard to watch you the past week." You felt regret at having let your own stupid actions affect others and apologised.

"Sorry Armin, I just got too caught up in work, that's all." Your voice was true and he knew there was nothing else that had been bothering you. "But I actually had an amazing sleep last night for the first time in years." He nodded, glad you'd been able to rest, but a frown crossed his face as you reached out for your coffee. Cursing loudly as the hot contents spilled on your hand, you quickly put the cup down and hoped he hadn't seen, knowing full well that he had. Rubbing your forehead, you laughed lightly and smiled at how fucking ironic the whole thing was, grabbing tissues to clean up the mess.

"You don't need to say anything, (F/N)." There he went again, being so downright gentlemanly and sweet and you wondered if he knew what was going on. Looking over into his sad blue eyes, you saw slight confusion, letting you know he had no idea and you felt an explanation was owed as you considered the small blonde man a good friend as well as a good person. 

"I'm ashamed to admit it, but I have a slight problem. I haven't ever said this out loud before and I think it's going to sound rather self indulgent and irresponsible." Sighing, you continued as he kept his soft gaze on you. "I won't go into the whys or the whens, just to say it's a long term thing." Heart racing at your imminent confession, you felt slightly clammy as you dropped your gaze.

"I have an alcohol addiction. It doesn't usually affect my day to day life, I can function perfectly well apart from the odd occasion." Most recently, that would have been the day after Erwin delivered his news about Jean's beating. "I'm quite resilient to the effects, which is why I can drink you three under the table." His laughter at that made you glad - it meant that perhaps he wasn't judging you. "But I use it as a crutch. I can't normally sleep at all without it. Last night was the first time in so long that I went to bed sober. And this," you picked up your cup again, shakes more pronounced at the addition of liquid in your hand. "This is the result of withdrawal and dependence."

Your friend placed his hand on your free one and smiled. "Thank you for telling me, (F/N)." He now looked serious and delivered his next sentence with genuine feeling. "I want you to know I don't think anything less of you than I did five minutes ago. You're unbelievably strong and I respect you, as well as your candid words. I'm here if you ever need anything." Tears welled in your eyes and you quickly wiped them away with care, not wanting to smudge your eyeliner. Armin knew you weren't upset, probably relieved and he smiled at you again.

Levi stormed back in, almost hidden behind stacks of papers and he carefully placed them down before looking over at your watery gaze. "(F/N)?" His questioning but soft tone reached your ears and you shook your head. 

"I'm ok Levi, I'm good." Warily he sat, keeping a close eye on the little brat next to you and sipped his tea.

Later, you announced that you were going for a cigarette and as you left, the director followed closely behind. As soon as the door was shut, Connie spoke. "What's up with them today?" Marco nodded emphatically, taking up the conversation. 

"I know, right? (F/N) doesn't look like death anymore but Levi hasn't said a word." The man was right, he hadn't even delivered one of his usual derogatory comments and Armin simply shook his head whilst answering. 

"I'm sure they're fine." Connie didn't stop and voiced his own theory. 

"Maybe they had a blazing row and she won?" The smallest member of the group shook his head again, but with a smile this time. 

"No, if they'd had a row you'd know about it." He recalled the morning he'd walked in on you both and the others stared at him with confusion, however he remained tight lipped.

Downstairs in the smoking area, you breathed in your cigarette deeply. Levi stood impassively, staring across the road, no sign of emotion even when he spoke. "Want to tell me what that was about earlier?" You sighed and turned to him. 

"I picked up my coffee and spilt it everywhere from shaking so fucking much." Dragging on the smoke, you carried on. "Armin saw and I told him the truth." The raven haired man was slightly surprised at your admittance, but he supposed the small blonde was the most bearable of the group and you seemed to have taken to him like he was a little brother. He knew your closest friends were aware, but only by what they saw. Levi had picked up on it from an experienced eye so this must have been the first time you'd spoken out. Deciding to let it be, he just nodded, aware of how your mood seemed even lighter than before.

That evening you went straight home and cooked dinner as a show of thanks. You now both sat on the couch, contentedly full and drinks in hand, neither of you wanting to relive the effects that ran through you this morning. Speaking quietly, you broke the comfortable silence. "We need to have a house warming." Steely eyes turned to you, his face looking down with a disgusted sneer. 

"Really?" He appeared totally unimpressed and you plastered on your best sweet expression, gaze wide and expectant. As Levi stared, he fought back the urge to grin at the angelic face in front of him and knew he couldn't refuse. Rolling his eyes, he nodded and you threw yourself on him with a squeal, hugging him tightly with glee.

~~~~~~

When you awoke on Friday, the familiar pull of a foggy head and feeling of cotton wool in your mouth washed over you like an old friend. You could deal with this better than the way you felt yesterday, but you'd at least both gone to sleep earlier than usual and as you rubbed your eyes, you thought about last night and how amazing it was. No games, no torturous teasing, no props. Just you, Levi and passion. To most it probably would have seemed like the standard sex that couples enjoyed, however for the two of you it was different. Even from the start, your physical relationship was raw and impulsive, moving on quickly to the trusting and intense sexual desires that manifested in a way neither of you had experienced before. Yesterday was different in a good way and you imagined it may be how usual partners felt when they experimented once with handcuffs.

As you turned, you locked onto a soft grey gaze. He was thinking about it too, how perfect it had been and how totally out of character for both of you. Not that it was how either of you intended to continue every time from now on, but it wasn't unwelcome. It had only served to cement your feelings for each other and sent shivers through him at how gentle you could be with each another. Running a thumb over your lips, he smiled and a rush of love washed over him as he looked upon your fuzzy hair and wide grin. "Hey." It was all he could manage as he touched your soft mouth. 

"Hey yourself." As your words reached his ears, he was reminded of the first time he'd woken up next to you and thought of how far the pair of you had come in such a short time.

Once you were both showered, dressed and full of pain killers, you sat together on the couch with your usual hot drinks in hand. "Now, this feels right." Levi looked over to see you rubbing your head and couldn't help but smile at how ridiculous your statement was, although knowing all too well that yesterday morning had freaked you both out somewhat. Sipping the black liquid, you breathed in the aroma of the strong coffee and began to feel better, thoughts returning to planning. "Who are we going to invite?"

For a moment, he couldn't grasp what you were talking about and placed his head on your shoulder - then it all came flooding back. Your man groaned loudly as he remembered agreeing to the stupid fucking party in a moment of weakness and the noise made you jump as you turned to glance down at his slightly upwards facing expression, silver eyes shut under a frown as if to try and wish it all away. Smiling, you placed a kiss in between his furrowed brows, on the spot just above the bridge of his nose that wrinkled in distaste. "Come on Levi, you know it'll be fun." You poked him in the cheek playfully, trying to get him to break. All that you achieved was a set of molten orbs snapping open to glare at you.

The morning had gone by quickly and high spirits returned as the amount of successes today far outweighed any issues. It was lunchtime and you sat looking over your laptop whilst munching a sandwich. Levi had his tablet with him today, expecting emails and he scowled at the demon electronic device with hatred. Flicking his stare up, he was happy to see you eating without being prompted and thought how you seemed so much more alive than two days ago. Despite the internal joy at the presence of food, his lips began to twitch as he saw a small blob of mayonnaise in the corner of your mouth that you seemed oblivious to. It was all he could notice now and was driving him insane. Trying to concentrate on his tablet proved futile as his eyes kept scanning over the offending smudge on your face.

With a harsh sigh, he leant over and picked up one of the paper napkins that you really ought to have used yourself and forgetting where he was, raised it to delicately wipe the mess from you. Without turning, you mumbled in thanks and continued to read the figures on your screen. It wasn't the first time he'd had to do it as it was a frequent occurrence for you. Levi threw the paper towards the bin, hitting it's target expertly and turned back down to his own work. 

Connie, Marco and Armin watched the small exchange in silence, youngest male smiling at the loving gesture. Looking over to his friend, he was greeted by the bald man's confusion. It wasn't that his colleague didn't know you were together, but he always imagined the two of you would be less, well, normal.

As evening approached, the city darkened around you, orange sheen of street lights bathing the small office room in an eerie glow. You'd all worked a bit later than usual, preferring to finish the last pieces of the task you were concluding rather than leave it hanging to be picked up on Monday. It was nearly seven and you leant back in your chair and stretched, arms above your head and legs sticking out under the table, an action that would look more correct on a cat. You heard a snicker and sat back up, staring over at the source of the laughter. Marco shook slightly with his giggles and you frowned, having presumed it would've been Connie. The freckled man shrugged and tried to explain.

"We've been stuck in this room together for nearly three months," he began, receiving a scowl from Levi at the terminology. "Ok, not stuck. But you know what I mean. And in that time I don't think I've ever seen you looking so at home as just now." Your expression remained and you looked on him with a perplexed glare. 

"What do you mean, Marco?" He looked like he was struggling to find the right words and you let him fidget, patiently waiting to find out what his thought process was. Finally, he spoke again. 

"You're usually much more, I dunno, upright?"

You couldn't help it as laughter spilled from your lips, a hearty sound that was infectious and three faces grinned over at you. The man in charge stood and turned, shoving his phone and keys into the suit jacket that hung from his chair and took his tie off, carefully folding it and placing it in the inside pocket, trying his damndest to hide his own smirk. "What the fuck Marco? Upright?!" You managed to question him through hitches of giggles and shook your head as he just shrugged, slightly confused by his own words. 

"I guess you just looked relaxed, (F/N). That's all."

After the light hearted if slightly odd exchange in the office, you'd all gone to the bar straight from work, giggles still hitting you now and again on the short cab ride. When you arrived, you saw Reiner and Erwin at the counter, precariously perched on stools. Levi left his blazer at the booth and made his way over to the men as Marco went to get drinks at your insistence - it was only fair given his ability to come out with the most random things at times. You watched your lover talking with the two ex marines and saw Reiner's wide eyes, realising that they must have been discussing Kenny. Large hands were raised in supplication and you saw a delicate gesture in response that meant it was ok, no need to apologise. 

The tall male returned with beverages, followed by Levi who sat closely next to you, leaning over to speak quietly. "He remembers Kenny and some random conversations but has no idea what really happened. He was fucked." You nodded, feeling no animosity at all; he wasn't to know who the man had been. "I told him it was ok. I know what my shitty uncle's like." Taking your drink, you sipped lightly and glanced over to see all three of the bar's staff behind the counter. Nudging your lover to let you out, you excused yourself and rushed over to them, hugging your friends tightly and ruffling Eren's hair, fresh blonde highlights across his brown locks.

Annie pulled you to the side, as far away from Erwin as possible. "(F/N), I need help." Your face changed to a serious expression as you listened intently to your friend. "Erwin's great and all that, but he's a bit, well, boring. And I can't stop thinking about Reiner." Sighing, you took her hand. She was far too impulsive, you thought and spoke quietly. 

"Annie, give him a chance. It hasn't been that long, has it? And he's really sweet. I don't know Reiner that well, but he seems a bit gloomy?" She nodded, thinking that you were probably right and also how awkward it would be if she switched between the friends. 

"I guess so, (F/N). Grass is always greener, yea?" You squeezed her hand and your friend smiled, making a decision to stick with the same man for now.

You moved to talk to Ymir, not having seen her in ages. "How are you and Historia?" She shrugged, never one to give much away. 

"It's ok, still argue a lot but it's good more than bad." That was all you would get from her and you knew it. Leaning closely, you whispered your next query. 

"What did you do with the, you know….?" Her face remained cool as she smirked slightly. 

"I know someone. Got a good price for it too." Returning her smile, you left it at that, honestly not wanting to know how she was affiliated with a person who dealt in fire arms.

Eren was in full flow, cocktail shaker in hand and you kept a sensible distance, not wanting to get sprayed by the drink again. He grinned over with confidence and you watched as he deftly filled glasses and garnished them carefully, proving he'd been practicing. "Not bad, Eren! How are you feeling?" He still had a slightly red tinge to his nose, a reminder of his long and perhaps slightly exaggerated cold. Sniffing as if to add credence to his previous illness, he shook his head. 

"Oh it was awful, (F/N). I thought I was dying." You rolled your eyes and patted his shoulder in pretend sympathy. 

"Well I'm glad to see you back on your feet." He smiled and moved off to continue service.

A quick chat with Erwin told you that he was absolutely smitten with Annie and he looked at you with such softness on his face it made your heart swell. Reiner had muttered an apology about Kenny, which you brushed off without another thought before returning to the booth sit next to Levi and you felt a gentle arm around your waist, pulling you sideways into him and smiled, a feeling of safety surrounding you.

~~~~~~

You curled up on the sofa with a coffee and a cigarette, staring blankly at the Saturday afternoon TV as you thought about preparations. Levi was in the gym, leaving you to consider the food and drink you would need to buy for next week's party. Messages had been sent to your friends inviting them round for your two month's late housewarming. Given what had been happening in your lives, it seemed more than acceptable to have waited this long. You'd invited the three from work too, much to their boss's dismay, but you weren't sure if Connie or Marco would even come.

Picking up your laptop, you placed a runaway piece of hair behind your ear and opened the online site, preferring to get items delivered than have to suffer the experience of real life shopping. Slow movers with trolleys sent you into a frenzy of unusual anger and you were pretty sure that you would get banned from the supermarket one day. Levi returned, messing your locks up again with a hand on his way past to the shower and you smiled. He point blank refused to use the ones in the gym, fearful of their unsanitary state.

The food order had been finished and was set to arrive at the same time next week. A figure approached and you looked up to see the pile of mail you'd been accumulating at the end of the breakfast bar now in his hand. Sighing, you supposed it was time to actually go through it all, but left your half of the bundle on the coffee table for a while longer, eyes spotting a handwritten envelope that had been redirected from your old address. It could be dealt with later, you thought and shuffled over to lay your head on Levi's shoulder instead, breathing in his clean scent.

That evening, you sat on the lounger by the bedroom window, curtains closed, the only source of light coming from the lamp in the hallway. You gazed over intently, wondering how long your partner would actually stay like that and how long you could stand it yourself. But you were enjoying the psychological game, knowing the faint humiliation would be eating away at him. He knelt on the bed, resting back on his heels, hands bound behind his back and a red scarf around his eyes. The dark leather that held his wrists together stood out in perfect contrast against his pale, naked skin and he hardly moved. It had been twenty long minutes and you became increasingly unable to wait.

Now and again, Levi thought you were coming closer, every noise picked up by his now sharpened sense of hearing and he would twitch, expecting to feel your touch. But nothing had happened. Carefully you stood, not making a sound and crept towards his beautifully submissive form, watching for any sign that he was aware of your approach.

Straining to hear any semblance of movement, he tightened and titled his head slightly, but then relaxed as he was sure you weren't even in the room anymore and he was almost ready to break with impatience. Suddenly he gasped and quickly exhaled in a groan as he felt your warm, soft hand gripping tightly around his erection. About fucking time too, he thought as he felt you climb up onto the bed and place your other hand around the front of his neck, angling his head up so you could take his lips into a rough kiss from your higher kneeling position.

As you tasted the wine in his mouth and felt a strong pulse under the tight grasp you had on his throat, you sighed. Back to normal.


	20. Memorabilia

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I need to say that this one gets a bit dark in places, but hope you enjoy all the same.

It was like Christmas again, just without all the gaudy lights and sparkling decorations. Food and drinks were set out neatly, at least for now and all that was missing were your friends. Levi scowled from the couch as he brushed at his leg, trying to remove a piece of random thread that had invaded his otherwise flawless exterior. You checked your phone and saw a message blinking - Hange and Mike were nearly here and you smiled at the fact she felt the need to give you prior warning. Passing the grumbling man a drink, you leant across and ran your finger over his knotted brows, attempting to smooth out the frown. A hand swiped at you but you saw how silver eyes smiled and took no offence at his actions.

Half an hour later and most of the people you'd invited were here already, with the exception of Marco. He would be coming, Connie advised you, but a bit later on than he'd hoped. Casting your eyes around, you saw that Hange had disappeared, having obviously ignored your request to her for no snooping. It was inevitable though and you smiled lightly as you went to search for her, trying the bedroom first. Bingo. Snapping her eyes up, she looked guilty as she stood with your wardrobe door open. Arms crossed, you tapped a foot with fake annoyance and she slowly closed the closet and shrugged. "Just looking for the good stuff, (F/N)."

You dragged the protesting female out and back into the vibrant room, a space full of happy, smiling faces. Well, mostly. Levi was being talked at by Eren, looking distinctly bored as he rolled his eyes and sipped a drink. It was only one evening, you had said, it'll be fun, you promised. Fucking fun my ass, he thought as he shot daggers with his glare over to the woman responsible for this shitty situation. All he received in response was a sugar coated smile and the middle finger.

The night wore on and the noise level increased. Hange and Mike were all over each other like a rash, occasionally surfacing for air to talk and you did your best to avert your gaze for fear of being sick. Marco had arrived with apologies and a large orchid in an ornate vase as a gift and he now sat with Connie, debating furiously over who would win in a fight between a lion and Superman. Annie had not left Erwin's side all night and the way she looked up at him as he spoke to a rather intimidated Armin made you sure she'd decided to stick with him after all. Reiner hadn't been invited, not through any dislike for the man, but you really didn't know one another that well and it may have been an awkward situation to place the lovers in.

Ymir had been deep in conversation with Historia for over an hour and you kept glancing over to check for any signs of an argument, however it seemed to be alright for now. The only person not conscious was Eren, having passed out on one of the chairs about fifteen minutes ago. Turning, you sorted empties in the kitchen, opening new bottles and fetching clean glasses. Arms wrapped around your waist tightly and a chin was placed on your left shoulder, voice whispering in your ear. "I'm in hell, (F/N). This is fucking awful." Knowing his penchant for the dramatic, especially in social environments, you laughed and laid your head back into him. 

"It could be worse, Levi." He struggled to see how, but kept quiet and placed a soft kiss on your exposed neck instead.

Unbeknownst to you both, Connie had shuffled drunkenly into the kitchen and let out a huge pained sigh, making you turn to stare over at his depressed expression. He looked at you with one eye half shut and shook his head, pointing a wavering finger in accusation as he slurred his words. "Not you as well, fuck off." The raised eyebrows he received in response let his fuzzy brain know he needed to elaborate. "It's bad enough watching those two," he said whilst jabbing a thumb over his shoulder in the vague direction of Hange and Mike. "But now you're at it too!" Gently removing yourself from Levi's now vice-like grip, you placed a hand on Connie's shoulder and held him steady, offering your own words of wisdom.

"You don't have to watch. And you don't have to stay if you don't want to." He stuck his bottom lip out and swayed lightly, considering his next move - the sensible option was chosen. 

"(F/N) can you call me a cab please? I'm a bit ill." Snorting laughter at his way of saying 'I'm totally ruined', you went to comply with his intelligent request.

Marco had gone with his friend out of concern that he was going to get himself killed and the ever quiet Ymir offered to help Eren home with the assistance of her surprisingly strong girlfriend. Before she left, you checked they were ok and got the usual shrugged response. They hadn't argued, at least.

By the time midnight appeared, you and Levi were alone once more, surrounded by mess and half drunken glasses of alcohol. "Tch. We've got to clean up now. I won't be able to fucking sleep knowing this shit is out here." Making no protest at his demand, you held up your hand to show him the black bag you'd already started to fill. The frown he'd worn all evening finally left his face and he smirked. "And that, (F/N), is why I fucking love you." Laughing, you continued your cleaning and watched as he began to collect cups with disgust.

~~~~~~

It was Tuesday evening before you remembered to open your ever increasing pile of mail. Well, maybe not remembered, more like had been told to do something about it. Standing in the kitchen, just home from work, you sorted through the envelopes first, placing the blatant junk to one side in the recycle pile so you didn't even need to open them, caring not one bit that some random bank was offering you 0% on all credit card transfers. Only a few remained, one telling you that your warranty on the steam mop was coming to an end. Recycle. Don't ever use it anyway. The next was a card from the estate agents, wishing you luck and prosperity in your new home and asking you to kindly recommend them to a friend. Recycle. Letter from your insurance company with the documents for the policy you had taken out on the new address. Keep. 

That left the small, handwritten one you'd noticed the other day. A red sticker sat on the front, advising you it had originally been posted to your old apartment but the forwarding address you'd given the post office had been matched, meaning it now made it's way safely to where it should be and the item felt strangely heavy as you opened it.

Levi was in the bedroom, getting changed out of his work clothes and into sweats and a t-shirt. Gathering the dirty washing from the hamper, he sorted it in order of requirement, shirts being a priority. As he reached for the next one, he heard a shout from the kitchen and straightened, scowl settling in on his brows.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" You couldn't help it, not usually one to raise your voice often outside the bedroom, but the insanity of the words you had just read demanded a suitable reaction. The man came rushing through and saw a look of confusion and anger on your face as you looked up with an open mouth of disbelief. 

"What's wrong?" He swept over and took the letter from your hand, his own expression changing to almost match yours and grey eyes saw words like 'sole beneficiary' and 'remove belongings' and he heard your voice once more as it came out in a squeak of indignation. 

"That fucking rat bastard!"

Levi read it again but properly this time, the female seething ball of fury next to him almost bouncing on the spot. It was from a solicitor's firm, informing you that your filthy shit of a step grandad had died in mid February, had been buried already and left everything to you in his will, a document which had been amended in late January. After you'd kicked the shit out of him. Part of the will included the contents of his apartment and the organisation he rented the place from wanted it cleared as soon as possible. His wishes had been explicit - no one to attend the funeral for some reason, probably because he knew no one would go.

Folding the paper to hide poisonous words, Levi looked across to you and took a deep breath. "What are you going to do?" You shook your head, still fuming and grit your teeth to snarl a response. 

"I don't fucking know, I really don't. He's done this intentionally to fuck with me, Levi. He knew there's things in there that were my gran's and he fucking well knew that I wouldn't want to just throw them away." Sighing, you ran your hands through your hair in exasperation. "He wants me to go back there." You were pulled into a tight embrace, mind whirring with dark thoughts as arms gripped you strongly. Making a decision, you murmured into Levi's onyx locks. "There's a key in the envelope. Let's go." Holding you out at arm's length, he looked into your eyes and found a steady, determined gaze. He just nodded and you gathered your things to go and make the cab journey across town.

It was a horrible building, made of dark stone and badly lit. The communal corridors weren't much better, flickering bulbs in the concrete hall adding to the awful feeling that gripped at your insides, turning your stomach to lead. Damp patches sat around every corner and the floor was littered with empty bottles of cheap vodka and dirty syringes. It hadn't always been this bad, but as it was one of the oldest blocks around, it had been subject to the ravages of time. The stairwell was even worse and it stank, a combination of piss and broken dreams. Taking each upward step slowly, your sense of impending doom grew to a dark sheet that clouded your vision. Reaching the door, you stopped, announcing silently that you were here.

You couldn't move and Levi took the key that you'd gripped tightly in your hand the whole way. With a steely expression, he unlocked the entrance and swung the door inwards. It smelt awful, aromas of stale furnishings and abandoned items curling out and reaching your noses in rancid threads of thick air. A hand grabbed yours and you took a deep, shaking breath as you walked in together. Flicking on a dusty, stained lamp, you looked around at how little it had changed and decided to get this over with, in and out as quickly as possible and then call someone round to clear everything else, petrol bomb the place if needed.

Striding down the short hall, your eyes remained forwards as you passed the bedroom door, body tensing at the proximity of it. Making your way into the small cramped living room, you turned on another light, thankful that the electricity company were still supplying here and you cast your eyes around, looking for three specific items that you presumed and hoped were still inside. So intent on the task at hand, you hadn't noticed Levi was no longer next to you as you spotted the first thing you were here for. A crappy wooden picture frame that housed a snap of your parents before you were born. Scooping it up, you coughed at the dust cloud you had disturbed and pulled the photo out and began to look for the other two important mementos.

Down the hallway, Levi stood at the now open bedroom door and stared in with hatred. Thick curtains that were stained with something dark and unidentified were hanging over the small window, the decrepit bed was about to collapse in on itself and the once imposing wardrobe sat with cracked veneer and tarnished handles. He didn't know what he was looking for, not even sure if it existed, but he had to check for your sake. Gut feeling told him to search in here for something he had no solid idea about, however instinct had kicked in on the way over.

Opening the doors, he found a nearly empty closet which housed only a few pieces of filthy clothing and he turned his gaze down to where shit loads of old yellowed shoe boxes sat. Crouching, he started to flip the lids off, finding footwear in some, nothing in others. But one caught his eye. It was newer and stuffed full of letters, writing looking up at him in faded ink and he pulled the box out. With a look of pure disgust, he leafed through the contents and there at the bottom, hidden beneath forgotten correspondence, he found what he was looking for, what he had known for some reason to be housed here. As you had explained earlier, the man wanted you back in your place of torment, but Levi thought how it wouldn't just be to relive the surroundings and bring back horrific memories; he'd guessed that something else was here that your dead abuser wanted you to find and that was why he changed his will after your last encounter.

The letters were all from your mother to your father and vice versa, love notes from days gone by and it made the perfect place to store the hideous surprise as you would presumably want to read the words your parents had exchanged. What a fucking scheming little prick, thought Levi as he pulled out three old, well handled polaroid pictures, his sleeve down over his hand so he didn't have to touch them. One quick glance showed him all he needed to see and he threw the box back in the wardrobe with a growl, quickly rushing to the small, grease stained kitchen. Pushing the door to, he tossed the dirty keep sakes into the limescale encrusted sink and clenched every muscle in his body with rage. Placing his lighter down, he watched as small orange flames quickly engulfed the images, your small, young and scared naked form on them disappearing into curling black bubbles. Turning the tap, he was relieved to see water pour out, even if it was brown in colour and the liquid washed the pieces away down the drain and out of existence.

Back in the living room, you had found the second item, a wooden carved ornament in the shape of a cat that screamed 1970's chic. It had been a favourite of yours and you ran your fingers over the lines that were supposed to represent fur, thumb brushing over the plastic green eyes that were cut to look like emeralds. You remembered playing with it along with you grandmother and it had always captivated you for some reason. Placing it with care in your bag, you glanced around. The third thing eluded you. There used to be a wooden box in here that had letters in, letters you used to try to read but couldn't quite decipher. Your gran had told you what they were though and you longed to see the words that you could now understand, pieces of your family history and an insight into a mother you didn't remember.

Hearing a noise, you felt Levi walking in and realised he hadn't been here. There was a shoe box in his hands and he passed it over to you in silence. Inside were the missives, old and tinged with slight damp in the corners but your eyes lit up at the scraps of paper in front of you. Looking up, you saw a strange expression on his face, one of loathing as well as sorrow and he curtly explained it had been in the wardrobe. Not wanting to linger here any more than you had to, you clutched the box closely to your chest and left.

The journey back had been made without a word and your fingers traced over the cardboard treasure that laid on your knees. When you returned home, Levi went straight to the kitchen before even taking his shoes or coat off and brought out a bottle of scotch and two glasses, delivering them to the coffee table. You slumped down on the couch, newly acquired items placed down and you heard two thumps as his footwear hit the floor. Pouring generous measures of the brown liquid, your hand shook and spilled some of it on the wooden surface. Cursing, you mopped it up with your sleeve, not caring as the wetness seeped into your top.

Levi pressed in closely as he sank down beside you and downed half of the drink, hissing through his teeth as the strong substance hit his throat and burnt in a warming sensation. Following suit, you picked up your glass and felt the calming heat as it reached your stomach. You looked over at his stiff jaw and dark eyes and saw the way he had a fist balled up at his side. "Levi, you ok?" It wasn't how you'd expected him to be, but you also weren't sure exactly how he would have reacted. Either way, the furious man next to you was worrying.

He hated the fact that he had to keep something from you, despite it being the only option. There was no way in hell he was going to let you know what he'd found and how the pictures had been planted there intentionally, those well worn images that had obviously been picked up and touched many, many times. Stomach turning at what that meant, the heavy weight of knowing something so terrible bearing down, he tried to keep his emotions at bay and turned to you. 

"I'm fine, (F/N). Just glad to be out of that shit hole." That was the honest truth, just not all of it. "It made me want a fucking shower." You nodded and placed a hand on his arm, a gesture that filled him with self loathing. It should be him asking if you were ok, providing comfort, not the other way around. Trying to push everything deep down inside, he took you in his arms and held you tightly to let you know that you were safe, attempting to bury the thought of the keep sakes. He made a promise to himself, a sincere resolution to ensure this would not get in the way of your relationship, despite the secret he inevitably had to keep.

~~~~~~

Hugging the cold toilet, you brought up bile that was tinged with brown flecks, stomach pushing in uncontrollable retching motions. At 4.13am you had dragged yourself out of bed and ran straight for the bathroom and you guessed that had been about half an hour ago. Shivers engulfed your body and your hands were numb, pins and needles making them feel like they were someone else's. With every heave, a sharp pain exploded in your head and you kept your eyes squeezed shut until the vomiting subsided, holding onto white porcelain to keep you steady. Standing carefully, you turned and stumbled to the sink to squeeze white and blue striped gel onto your toothbrush.

Once the horrendous taste had been eliminated, you shakily grabbed tablets from the cabinet and swallowed them without water. Holding your pounding head, you reached over to turn on the shower and then got undressed, your whole figure trembling and weak. Stepping in under the stream of hot liquid, you placed your hands on the glass walls to keep you from collapsing and stood groaning as the strong jets made tiny rivers down your skin, trying to soothe your soul.

Levi leant against the door frame and looked over as you held yourself up with shaking arms and bowed your head under the water whilst dealing with his own personal hangover. It was awful, but not as extreme as the one that had settled upon you like a monster of excessive drinking. Presuming you wouldn't even entertain the thought of staying at home, he remained still and recalled how you'd read through all of the tattered letters last night with teary eyes, mumbling stories of your father and grandmother. It was like a sense of painful closure and he'd observed you going through almost every emotion that humanity had to offer, holding you when you wept and smiling at light hearted anecdotes and memories. By the time you started to slur, he made sure to get you carefully to bed, but hadn't been able to sleep for ages himself, mind still invaded by uninvited thoughts of his grim discovery.

Snapping out of it, he noticed the water had stopped running but you still stood in the cubicle, head pressed on the glass and eyes shut. He rushed over to help you out, cradling your fragile, wet body to him gently. "(F/N)?" You moaned quietly in response, still unable to raise your head from where it now sat on his bare chest. "(F/N), can you actually see?" Another groan which sounded like a negative reply. Not caring you were dripping everywhere, he picked you up and slowly placed you back in bed. 

"Levi...I need to go to work." The pathetic voice coming from your mouth was small and mouse-like and he sat on the mattress next to you, stroking your soaked hair. 

"I don't fucking think so. Work from home once you've had some more sleep." It was an order, not a suggestion and you hated yourself for yet again being a total dick.

"I'm sorry." He continued his soft motions, running his nails across your head, causing you to hum in much needed contentment. 

"Don't be soft, (F/N). Not the first time, won't be the last." The sad, depressing truth reached your ears and you felt a lump forming in your throat, angry frustration pulling at your heart as quiet, warm tears ran from your closed eyes. 

"No, Levi." Your words came out in chokes and sobs as you put a hand over your face. "It will be the last. I refuse to be a fucking mess anymore." He was surprised, but the power was evident in your voice. "I swear to you I will never fucking touch scotch ever again." It wasn't exactly an exclamation of sobriety, but a promise to lay off the harsh liquor that had such a terrible effect on you.

Levi lifted your upper body carefully and wrapped his arms around you, face buried in your neck as he also decided to make a choice. "Me neither, (F/N). It's fucking disgusting anyway." He made you laugh, a welcome reaction that lifted both of your spirits.

Arriving alone at work, Levi sighed, making sure he made no sudden movements that would send his head into spirals of pain. It all came shattering down as he saw a figure bouncing towards him. Hange. And she was almost screaming her greeting at him, making white lights flash in front of his eyes. "Hey short stuff, where's (F/N)?" Pinching the bridge of his nose, he shook his head very carefully and grumbled his response. 

"Working from home. She's not well." The woman came to a halt by his side, looking down at his crumpled stance. 

"You don't look too good yourself, you know." Snapping his glare up, instantly regretting it, he stared with red eyes. 

"Fuck off."

There was no feeling behind what he'd just said and Hange put an arm around his slumped shoulders, guiding him into a small, unoccupied meeting room. Levi made absolutely no attempt to stop what was happening as he was firmly pushed down into a leather chair. Placing his elbows on the table, he dropped a heavy head into his hands as he felt her pull her own seat closer. "You guys are your own worst enemies." Her voice was gentle and full of concern and he raised his gaze to see the same emotion staring back at him. 

"It's not like we did it for shits and giggles," he growled, feeling slightly dizzy and realising why he was even entertaining this exchange - he was still a bit drunk.

The worry that filled the often manic woman increased. She knew that you had a problem and that Levi could certainly match your alcohol intake, but she hadn't seen him like this before and made the correct assumptions. Nodding, she conveyed her understanding with the simple movement and placed a hand on his trembling arm. "What happened? Did you have an argument?" A sharp, hollow laugh sounded from his mouth and his top lip twitched up into a sneer. 

"No, shit for brains, we didn't. And it's not my fucking place to tell you anything more than that." Unease ran through her veins and her stomach tightened, knowing that she needed to speak with you. Soon. Whatever is was, it had caused the strong man before her to show weakness, something that had never occurred in her presence in all the years she had known him.

"Levi?" He grunted to acknowledge her. "You need to go home. Now." She pulled him up, hands gripping his arms tightly as she locked gazes with the smaller man. "For a start, you can't even stand up straight." She kept talking over his attempts to argue. "And I can look after the boys. They'll be fine." Her tone became stern as she delivered her final insistence, words cutting with brutal honesty. "You need to be with each other." Any strength he had left in his being trickled away and he knew he should never have come in today. Sensing his acceptance, Hange steered him out of the room and pointed down the corridor to the lifts that he had only just come up in.

"Home." Turning, he began to shuffle off but caught her quiet parting words. "If you need to talk, you know where I am." He really did need to, had to get the pain and disgust off his chest, however he wouldn't be having any conversations unless you'd spoken with your friend first. It was an unnatural feeling, wanting to share a burden with anyone but you and he began to feel the hatred again as he stepped into the lift.

You'd had about an hour's broken sleep and finally decided to get out of bed, shivers and aches lessening in intensity. Grabbing your pyjama shorts, you stuck your legs in and threw a jumper on, wrapping your arms around your body as you made your way to the living room. You hadn't been expecting to see Levi sitting on the couch, having heard him leave earlier and rushed over to him, worry on your face. Throwing his upper limb around you, he held you close and sighed. "Hange sent me home." Unable to contain it, a giggle slipped from your lips in disbelief. "Alright, I know, it's bad enough I had to fucking go through that without you laughing." You ruffled his hair and smiled. 

"Why did she do that?" He shrugged at your question and sat back. As soon as you saw his features up close, you realised exactly why she had ordered him to leave. "Shit Levi, you look like I feel." Nodding slowly, he stood and pulled you up by the hand. 

"We both need to sleep, (F/N)."

Soon you were back in bed, arms and legs around each other's naked bodies, fatigue quickly getting the better of both of you.

Waking at nearly 2pm, you stretched, feeling a million times better than before. Levi stirred and you traced circles on his hard chest with a lazy finger as he looked down at you, offering a small smile. The slumber had revitalised him, no longer feeling caught in the slump of substance induced disgust and hatred and he felt a renewed strength in his heart as he gazed over your soft features. "Do you feel as good as I do, Levi?" you asked, also fully rested and free of pain.

Eyes flashing, he turned so you were both facing one another, lying on your sides. He ran a hand down your arm, continuing onto the roundness of your hip and back up your stomach, sending sparks through you. As his fingers reached your breast, he made his own light touches, mirroring the ones he had woken up to. "I bet we can feel even better soon," he said with a low voice and you felt movement against your thigh as his excitement took hold. You kissed him passionately, agreeing fully with your man's statement as you reached down to place your hand around his length, rubbing up and down slowly. Moaning into you, he ran his fingers through your hair, trailing them down your neck and back to your chest, squeezing feverishly.

The need within you both became urgent as usual and you increased your grip and pace on his hard shaft as you felt his hand quickly move down, fingers dancing in delicious circles. Groaning, he rolled over so he was lying between your open legs and thrust himself suddenly inside of you. More than ready to take him already, it was not a painful sensation, only one of pure pleasure as he began his slow movements. Breathing his name, you gripped tightly onto his back, meeting his pace and rolling your hips upwards with lust.

Teeth bit down hard against your collar bone and you shouted out at the intense feeling, pushing up into him, urging him to go faster. Feeling your desire, he licked across the mark he had just made and tasted blood, shivering with an increasing feeling of control. Raising himself up to lean on powerful arms, he slowed down even more, staring as he moved in and out of you with calculated, sweeping thrusts. "What do you want?" he growled, eyes locked to yours. "Want me to go faster?" You moaned loudly at his words and dug your nails into his skin. "Fuck (F/N), harder." Smirking up, you made your deal. 

"Only if you go harder too."

He lowered his lids, grey orbs watching closely. "You'll do as I tell you to." Excitement building, you groaned at his command, loving the way he ordered you around. Not wanting to disappoint, you gripped down harshly, watching his face contort into pure ecstasy at the feeling. He couldn't hold back any longer despite wanting to watch you squirm and began to push harder into your warmth as he felt sharpness scraping against his skin once more. "That's it, fuck yes…" His words were ragged as they came out in strained breaths with each pounding motion and he looked down again into your (e/c) eyes, seeing the need that lay within. Leaning close, he left a trail of marks across your shoulder, each bite making you squeal in delight.

Sensing you tightening at the sweet pain, he pushed into you faster and leant back up to stare at you. Feeling near the edge, you threw your head back with a shout, only to have a hand grip harshly around your face and pull it back down. "Look at me." Gazes were connected as the pace increased, both of you panting, swearing and groaning as your noses nearly touched, breaths mixing together. He knew you were nearly there by the way you chanted his name, the arousal of looking into each other's eyes adding to the experience. Growling, he ordered you again. "Speak." In short, clipped words you complied, unable to be wholly coherent.

"Levi, fuck, harder, I'm…Levi…coming…shit…oh fuck...so good…" He loved hearing you trying to describe your physical sensations and thrust as hard as he could inside of you, skin slapping against skin in a frenzied pace. Your orbs still stared into his as you met his speed feverishly, fingers gripping his ass tightly as more words spilled from your mouth. "Yes Levi, fuck me…fuck me…god yes…" With a yell, you came with hard intensity and Levi intently watched your pupils as the orgasm ran through you, sending the body beneath him into shakes and shudders.

It was all he could handle as the pain from your grasp mixed with the vulnerability of observing each other so closely overtook his control and he felt the knot in his abdomen about to explode. He whispered your name and grit his teeth, flesh a blur of movement and he shouted out as he released strongly. "(F/N), fucking hell…" Gasping, his eyes widened and you saw the pleasure wash through his flashing silver discs, loving how alive it made his gaze appear. As you both tried to catch your breath, you remained staring, not wanting to break the connection.

"Jesus (F/N), I fucking love you," he panted. "And I'm pretty sure you've broken my skin." He laughed lightly, a fantastic sound and pressed a kiss onto your lips, decidedly happy about the prospect of your nails having made him bleed. Pulling back, he smiled and you let out your own chuckle. 

"More than likely. You love it though." He growled at your dirty tone and slid off to lie beside you on his back, wincing slightly. 

"Yep. Definitely broken." Throwing a hand behind his head, you rolled over into his other arm, cuddling into him tightly. 

"Love you, Levi."

At that moment, everything was forgotten apart from the feeling of euphoria that washed over you both. Your worlds had been brought back into balance and without a single care for the mess on the bed, you both fell once more into a deep, restful sleep.


	21. Torment, Triumph and Teasing

After another hour of sleep, you'd both woken with clear heads and satisfied bodies. The two of you showered together, an act without any sexual intent, it was more one of closeness and you'd inspected Levi's back, touching the red lines your nails had left all over him, a few that had gone deep enough to draw blood but you weren't sorry. It was part of what made him so excited in the heat of the moment and you understood the sensation fully as you looked down at the marks across your chest and shoulder.

You were both now changing the bed, cutting the time it usually took in half. Gathering the dirty sheets, you took them straight to the washing machine as they smelt like a combination of alcohol and sex, light smudges of blood from both of you added in to the mix. As you turned the appliance on, you heard a buzzing and ran over to the kitchen to grab your phone, seeing Hange's name flashing up. Before you hit the green button, you noticed there were eight missed calls and cheerily answered her. "Hey Hange!" She grumbled back at you instantly. 

"What have you been doing, (F/N)? I've been trying to call you for ages!" You smiled as Levi walked through, looking across the room at you with a hungry gaze. 

"Sorry Hange, sleeping." She tutted through the receiver and you were pulled across onto the couch, landing on his lap with a small huff.

"Yea, I'll bet you were. Anyway, can I pop round after work? In about half an hour?" You sensed noises in the background, familiar voices that told you she was in the project room. 

"Sure you can Hange. How's it going there?" She laughed and told you they'd all been behaving. 

"Ah the boys have been great, haven't you?" Presuming she'd held the phone up, you heard a weary chorus of affirmatives, only imagining what she'd subjected them to all day. Arms appeared around your waist, hands rubbing across you and finding their way into your loose sweat pants. Wriggling, you tried to remain calm but let out a small giggle. Covering it up, you spoke to your friend with a slightly squeaky voice as you felt a palm rubbing over the warm spot between your legs, the other hand holding you strongly in place.

"Hange, you didn't tell them why, did you?" Snorting, she responded with slight annoyance. 

"Of course not, (F/N). Ok, I'll see you soon, yea? And tell him to stop that while you're on the phone. It's not polite." She hung up and you stared at the item in your hand, wondering how the fuck she knew what was going on. Gasping as a finger pushed inside of you slowly, you groaned and leant back against Levi. 

"Hange is coming over in half an hour." Slipping another in, he whispered into your ear. 

"Better be quick then, (F/N). Clothes off, on your knees."

~~~~~~

As your friend buzzed the apartment, you finished pulling on some jeans and shot a look across at your lover, a smugly satisfied expression on his face as he gathered his things, ready to go to the gym and leave the two of you in peace. "That was cutting it close, Levi," you chided, trying to compose yourself, confident there were now bright red hand prints on your ass. He smirked and titled his head with a shrug, safe in the knowledge that you'd loved every single second of it. 

"You know I could have taken my time, (F/N). Be thankful." Scowling with mock anger, you pressed the button to let Hange in.

When she arrived, Levi opened the door and she looked at him with a concerned face. He just nodded once and she squeezed his shoulder as they parted company. Once inside, she sat down heavily, kicking her shoes off and watched as you brought two glasses of wine over. "(F/N), is that a good idea?" 

"Yes Hange, I'm fine." She sighed and changed the subject. 

"Please tell me he didn't have his face between your legs when you were talking to me earlier?" Laughing, you shook your head. 

"No, not his face." Letting out her own giggles, she tried to look upset but failed massively.

Calmed quickly by her motive for the visit, she looked at you with worry and gripped your hand. "God (F/N), the state of him this morning." Nodding, you knew what she meant and let her continue. "What the fuck happened last night?" Taking a deep breath, you met her gaze with sorrow. 

"Oh Hange, I know why I got obliterated, but I don't fully understand his behaviour." Trying still to figure it out yourself, you saw her total confusion and thought about how much you loved her and that you owed it to this woman to be wholly honest.

With dry eyes, you told her everything. The abuse, the reason behind your suicide attempt, the letter and the trip last night, pointing out the keepsakes you had retrieved. None of it explained Levi's own destructive streak, however she sat and listened in silence, tears falling. You remained emotionless, having been through this painful conversation before and after last night's closure, you'd begun to try and put it to the back of your mind. You'd called a house clearance company earlier and paid them to do the necessary, removing everything from that place and out of your life. She hugged you tightly, muttering her regret and apologies for what you'd been through. Reciprocating the embrace, you assured her it was ok and thanked her for listening.

Once she'd composed herself, your friend sat back and stroked your cheek. "(F/N), he was probably just pissed off for you. He is really protective, try not to dwell on it." She was not convinced by her own words, but it seemed to work on you, relieving the burden to a degree.

The two of you chatted for a while and eventually the older woman sighed, telling you she'd better get going and cook Mike some dinner, having left him to let himself into her place alone. You waved her off at the door with more sincere appreciation and watched as she walked heavily to the lifts, hoping that you hadn't given her too much depressing information in one go.

As she reached the ground floor, Hange stopped as she saw Levi sitting waiting on one of the seats in the foyer, wondering if he'd been hiding out to let her speak with you alone. When he saw her, a hand waved, signalling to come over and she walked slowly across the marble floor. He looked at her puffy face, saw the slumped figure and asked a simple question. "She told you?" Nodding, Hange sighed and her expression clouded over. 

"My god Levi, it's fucking awful. I just wanted to keep hugging her and make it all go away." Levi nodded too with a heavy heart, fully aware of how that felt and he stood. 

"Have you got a minute?" Hange followed him outside and they moved away from the front of the building.

She noticed how the short man's hand shook as he lit a cigarette and she gladly took one from him when offered. The male next to her didn't talk much about anything, so this must be important. Not pushing him, she remained quiet so as not to scare his impending words away and when they came out in a low growl, she listened carefully. "Something happened in that fucking place, something I can never tell her about. It would crush (F/N) and I'm not about to do that." Dragging deeply on his smoke, almost half of it going in one breath, he stared across the street, face dark and strained. "But I need to tell someone, otherwise I'm going to go fucking crazy. I need to know I've done the right thing."

Hange nodded, feeling slightly uncomfortable with how open he was being, only because she wasn't used to it. When he started talking again, his voice was dripping in anger and tinged with sorrow. "He knew she'd want the letters and I figured it was all part of his fucking plan. He changed the will after they last met, so it was all done with calculated hatred." Lighting another cigarette, he continued but wouldn't look at the woman next to him. "There were old pictures under the letters, three of them. Filthy fucker must have held them in his dirty, shitty hand hundreds of times, his tiny limp dick in the other." Breathing out harshly, he finally turned to meet the shocked gaze on Hange's face.

"He took photos of (F/N), Hange. Fucking disgusting pictures. I couldn't get rid of the image in my head of the little girl lying there, scared shitless. And that's why I got so fucked up last night." She was crying again and ran a hand over her face to wipe the tears away as Levi sighed. He'd pushed it all down and out of his brain when he woke this afternoon, determined to carry on as usual. "I'm so glad I found them and not her. Can you fucking imagine what that would do to a person? I hate myself for keeping it from (F/N), we've always been totally open and honest. But it's for the best, right?" Hange was surprised that he was questioning himself, always usually a confident man, but this was a very difficult situation.

Taking his hand, she squeezed tight as she looked down at him. "Yes Levi, you did the right thing. Sometimes we have to keep painful things from those we love to protect them." Nodding, he gave her hand a slight squeeze back. 

"Thanks, Hange." Snapping out of it, he broke the grip and stared back out across the dark road. "Don't ever fucking tell anyone I let you touch me." It lightened the mood and she smiled. 

"Don't worry short stuff, I won't. Just promise me one thing." His silence invited her to continue. "Stop fucking about if I'm on the phone with her." She turned and left, leaving him feeling less pressured than before, knowing he'd made the right decision and he trusted Hange enough to keep it quiet - he knew she loved you dearly and would do anything to keep you out of harm's way.

~~~~~~

Sitting spinning round on the office chair, you tried to contain yourself. It was the first week in May but the last one of the project and everything you'd hoped to gain from the past few months had come to fruition, final presentation taking place today. The five of you had worked especially hard over the past couple of weeks, staying late and barely leaving the room. It had been intense, but fun as you all had a clear understanding of each other's personalities. Gearing up for a other spin, you swung your legs and pushed away from the desk as the door opened. Levi looked over at you with dismay, wondering how the revolving woman in front of him was going to help present the important findings in a few hours. Shaking his head, he threw a small box across to your whirling form which you struggled to catch, ending up swatting it away by mistake.

Using your feet for brakes, you came to a halt and let the dizziness subside before scooping the packaged sandwich up off the floor. Grinning, you thanked him and tore into it, stomach growling. The others were out for lunch together, under strict instructions to not drink any beer as they would all be in the board room later on. "We're all set, Levi. Going to smash this out of the fucking park." Despite your brash terminology, he agreed and looked over at the pristine packs of information you'd expertly collated as you walked to stand next to him.

You bent to give him a quick kiss and returned to your seat as he watched closely, having just given him an eyeful of your chest, slightly low cut dress revealing soft flesh. It was a beautiful deep blue figure hugging item and you'd been planning on wearing it for today's meeting for a while, meaning that Levi had to keep away from your neck area for a couple of weeks - walking into an exec meeting with visible bite marks and bruises would not be a good idea, so instead you now had them in a variety of other places.

The others returned and you looked over at them with scrutiny. Connie sighed dramatically and grinned in response. "No, we didn't drink, (F/N)." Nodding, you believed him and turned back to read over the slides for the presentation on your laptop.

The time had arrived and you rushed around the large room, placing papers down and checking that the screen displayed the right image. You would be in charge of the computerised side of things, with Levi chairing. The others were there to add in what they felt important and relevant and answer any questions. It was the same location in which you'd initially met the exec all that time ago and you looked down at the shiny table top with familiarity. Watching you hurry around, four sets of eyes followed your movements closely, taking in the way you wiggled around in the tight dress. Levi was aware of them looking at your body, but he couldn't care less. You were his and his alone and they all fucking knew it. Equally, he was wholly yours and there was never the need for jealousy in the relationship.

The executives began to arrive and you greeted them confidently, introducing the three males they probably didn't know and pointing them over to Levi to have their own conversations before the meeting began. The bearded one from before was here, naturally, and he smiled over to you with a lecherous look as he shook your hand, large stomach sticking out and nearly touching yours. Making a quick move, you led him to his seat and inwardly shook off any feeling of nausea.

Once it was all underway you remained standing, clicking the button in your hand to change the screen to the relevant slide and pointing parts out when required. Walking round, you made sure everyone was on the right page of their information pack, sweeping across the room to ensure everything ran smoothly. Connie had given a beautifully concise explanation of one of the processes when asked, maintaining an air of experience and professionalism you had never seen on him before. Armin had confidently talked through some of the technical parts and Marco slightly nervously added his thoughts. At least none of them blushed, you mused as Levi brought it to a close and invited any further questions. None came, having asked them throughout and they stood to thank you all and informed you they'd be in touch. You'd tidied up quickly and the small group of adrenaline fuelled humans made their way back to the project office.

~~~~~~

Two days later and Friday was here, the last day and the five of you were tying up loose ends, finalising systems and notes and generally having friendly banter. Levi sat and observed it all, proud of what you'd achieved together but also glad it was over. The close proximity of other people had begun to grate at his nerves and he longed for the anonymity of his own office again.

Stories were being shared with laughter when a knock sounded on the door. Being closest, you leapt over and opened it, inviting two execs into the room. There were no spare seats, so you all stood facing the new arrivals as one of them cleared his throat and began to speak.

"We were extremely impressed with all the work you've been doing and with your presentation earlier this week." He stopped and looked to his colleague as the second man took up the speech. 

"It's been made clear to us that this is the way forward, the way of the future." Pausing for dramatic effect, he smiled. "So it gives me great pleasure to tell you that the project was a complete success. We'll be rolling it out to the relevant divisions as soon as possible with you leading the innovation." The first man spoke again, smiling widely. 

"It's Friday afternoon. Leave this here, go and enjoy yourselves. We'll catch up on Monday." Hands were shaken and it looked like Connie was going to hug them, Armin finally blushed and Marco grinned from ear to ear. Levi remained business like and you smiled sweetly and wished them a good weekend as they left.

Once you were all sure the men were far enough away, cheers broke out, high fives were shared between three of them but you and Levi stood staring at each other, joy creeping over your faces. Not caring at all, your lover took you in a strong embrace and kissed you softy, arms wrapped around your waist. You threw yours round his neck and bent slightly backwards as he pushed his lips against yours. More cheers rang around the room and you broke apart, still grinning.

Marco screeched out above the noise. "Oh my god, can you see? He's smiling!" Loud laughter came from everyone but the director and he fixed his now stoic expression to one of pure hatred as he turned to stare at the freckled man, still gripping tightly to you. 

"Fuck off." That caused more hilarity and he just turned to you with flashing eyes, stealing another kiss from your mouth instead of trying to berate his subordinates any more. Connie shuffled about in his large bag and brought out a bottle full of brown liquid and paper cups. He went to hand you one, but you shook your head, one arm still holding onto the man next to you. "No thanks, Connie." He looked shocked and stared at you with wonder as you expanded on your refusal. "I don't drink scotch." Frowning, he pressed you for a better answer. 

"Since when, (F/N)?" He'd seen you knocking it back at your house party and was totally confused until you answered him plainly. 

"Since it doesn't agree with me anymore." Trying Levi, he was met with a delicate wave of a pale hand and he pouted. 

"What is this, some sort of pact?" You shrugged and moved to put your things away. Leaning close, the bald man whispered to his boss. "You guys still drink wine, right?" Levi smirked slightly, assuring him that you both most certainly did. "Good. Let's go get drunk."

~~~~~~

A week had passed since that day and you were back at your usual desk, greeting passing visitors and catching up with people. The decision had been made that Armin, Connie and Marco would be heading the required training across the departments and Levi would be holding meetings with the respective managers to outline what was expected, making sure everything ran smoothly. You returned to your previous support role after it had been acutely noticed how your presence was missed, in a work capacity as well as personal. It made you happy to know you were needed, but couldn't help but wonder if Hange had anything to do with it. Regardless, it was good to be back and with a healthy pay rise too. It didn't bother you that the link to the project was now severed as you enjoyed your job very much.

A figure approached and the usually bouncy brunette dragged herself up the corridor towards you. Her face was stony and you knew exactly why. Slumping down in your spare seat, she sighed and you passed her a chocolate from the box that sat on your desk, a present from Armin for all your support. Mumbling her thanks, you leant over towards her, bracelets jingling together as you clamped your hands between your knees. "How's it all going? Or should I not ask?" Her face was pained but the expression was invaded with slight contentment as she bit down on the sweet item in her mouth. 

"Oh (F/N), it's hell on earth. How did you guys manage?" You shrugged and popped a chocolate onto your tongue, letting the dark substance melt a little before chewing. Swallowing it down, you thought about how your organisational skills were probably a major factor and spoke to your friend. 

"I can help if you want? Fuck knows you and Mike aren't the most level headed people." That earned you a scowl, but she looked at you to continue. "Moving in together should be a good thing, don't let it all get you down." You could only imagine how much stress the two were going through and your offer of help was genuine. They'd found a place not far from work and it was a long time in the making, having even been talking about marriage a few months ago. But they had no idea what they were doing right now and you had seen first hand just how bad her packing was going.

Making a decision, you placed your palms on her knees. "I'm coming round tomorrow to help." She accepted your offer, or more correctly your insistence and smiled warmly as she replied. 

"Maybe get shorty to come? Do the heavy lifting? We could all go out for dinner?" Laughing, you thought about how that suggestion would go down. Levi had been more accepting of her recently, granted, but you presumed a double date would be out of the question. 

"One step at a time, Hange. Anyway, you're supposed to be moving on Monday, we don't have time to go out." Seeing her pout, you made a deal. "Pizza?" She seemed content with that and took your hands as she gave you a quick kiss on the cheek. 

"Let's do it."

A spring was in her step once more as she left and you groaned as you imagined how the conversation would be going with your partner. As if he knew, his form appeared by your side, black shirt clinging to his body as you looked up at him with love. "What did you just do, (F/N)?" Smiling with your best expectant face, you let him know what your Saturday would have in store for you both. He sighed and placed his hands on your desk, leaning in closely. "You owe me." As he swept off, you watched him leave in the same way that you used to do, stomach alight with the lust that always gripped you as he stormed away, only now you could go home to him, spend your time with that man and definitely do the things to him you used to only dream of.

~~~~~~~

Labelling boxes with accuracy, you cast your gaze around to see most of Hange's possessions stowed away carefully and looked over as Levi easily moved a chest of drawers away from it's previous home. Tutting with disgust, he motioned to the older woman to bring the vacuum cleaner over and then placed the back of his hand over his mouth to protect his senses from the balls of dust and hair that lay where the furniture had been. "That is fucking rancid." She looked suitably embarrassed at his declaration and turned on the appliance to rid the room of the fuzzy mess as Mike materialised next to you. 

"Thanks again, (F/N). It's been an absolute nightmare getting her to do this." Knowing all she needed was a good proverbial kick up the ass, you grinned at him. 

"No worries, Mike. It's our pleasure. Well, mine at least." Both of you watched as Levi gagged lightly and strode across to where the two of you stood. Placing an arm around you, the dark haired man pulled you close and kissed the top of your head, infinitely grateful of your thorough cleaning habits. 

"I can't fucking deal with this," he whispered in your ear. "What time is it?" Pulling your phone out, the screen showed you it was nearly 5pm and he nodded once. "That's it." He stalked off to the bag he'd brought along and pulled out two bottles of deep red liquid, looking to Hange expectantly. Her gaze then fell on you and (e/c) eyes looked down at the sealed box by your feet. 

"Sorry, I packed all the glasses." Turning, you looked across at the kitchen. "We have mugs though?" Levi had reached breaking point and grumbled as he filled the inappropriate vessels with wine, passing you one that proclaimed to be the best coffee cup. Ever.

A few more boxes had been secured and the pizzas arrived. Not surprisingly, Levi touched none of it, but you grabbed slices like you hadn't eaten in days. When the other couple weren't looking you passed pieces to him without thinking, knowing he hated to eat around others, especially shared food and you felt like you were feeding a dog under the table in secret. It was a bizarre action, one that might seem similar to a mother giving small morsels to a child, but it was all part of how well you knew each other.

Once as much as possible had been done, you checked with Hange that she'd contacted everyone that needed to be told of the impending change of address, only to be met with a surprising response. "Like who?" How had she gotten so far in life? Sighing, you grabbed your phone and sent her a list of who needed to be spoken to, pointing out which ones were the most important. Finally happy that you'd been as useful as could be, you wished her and Mike luck and made your way home with Levi who was still grumbling about the mess he'd unearthed.

~~~~~~

The clement weather meant that jackets were no longer needed and you enjoyed the summer breeze that circled around you, sending the last blossom petals spiralling from trees that lined the street. It had been a month since the end of the project and you were loving being back at your familiar desk with the steady flow of passers by that really had no reason to be taking that route. The seemingly constant chatter just reminded you of how enclosed you'd felt in the small room, not aware of it at the time, but now that you had been released it was starkly apparent.

Another welcome result was that you and Levi weren't together 24/7. You loved him, as he did you, but not having the ability to be around each other all day every day had added to the intensity of your relationship. It was like you were sneaking around again, catching glances and touches where you could, just like it had been seven months ago. Seven months since your first kiss. As you walked along, the comforting morning sunshine of June on your skin, you began to daydream about the time you'd spent together, all the ups and downs, the good and the bad. Hell, there had been plenty of drama in your lives. You smiled at what was probably the understatement of the year and hoped the recent calm was the start of a smooth ride for you both. Well, for you at least. You wouldn't be seeing Levi for a few days as he was going on a short business trip - perils of the role he held and you'd waved him off with a kiss when you left for work this morning, fully aware of his resentment at the assignment.

Back at the apartment, your lover finished packing the small suitcase with a grumble and set about organising things with care, making sure his plan was flawless.

Reaching your destination, you rummaged in your bag for the security pass, light fabric of your red dress flapping at your knees. Slight panic hit as the small piece of plastic eluded you, but finally your fingers brushed over the rectangular form and you pulled it out to gain entry. It was still quiet, being early and you made the journey to your desk in peace. A few people milled about and you offered smiles and waves to familiar faces before you spotted a small figure sitting at your desk. It was one of the five other people in the office that knew about your relationship with Levi. Actually, six if you counted Oluo; the words that had been growled at him at the end of last year left little room for misinterpretation. But no one seemed to have said anything to anyone else. You actually didn't care if they did, well, only slightly. If the whole place knew, it left no room for the childish sneaking around and you really did enjoy that.

Armin stood as you approached, smile on his face as you practically skipped towards him. "Hey (F/N), having a good day already?" Grinning, you gave him a hug and nodded. 

"Yea, it's lovely outside. I was getting fed up of the rain!" He sat back down on the chair to the side of your desk and you flopped into your own leather seat. "You all good, Armin? How's the roll out going?" He sighed and shook his head, blonde hair swinging around his face. 

"It's ok, but some people just don't want to accept change." It was an annoying truth and you knew how stubborn some of humanity could be, digging in their heels and clinging on to the old and familiar ways of working.

"I know Armin, it's fucking painful sometimes. But you'll get there, I know it." Smiling lightly, he knew you were right and stood to get back to the daunting task that lay ahead of him. 

"Thanks, (F/N). I just popped over to say hello, actually. Haven't seen you in ages." You said your goodbyes and watched as he walked away, a more determined gait than usual. He was starting to believe in himself more, aware of his abilities and you were proud.

Once you were logged onto the system, you saw an email, cordially inviting you and the whole company to a summer party. It was the first time they'd held one and you groaned at the prospect of spending more time schmoozing with people, some that bored you immensely. Levi would have to go and that naturally meant you would too.

~~~~~~

Opening your front door that evening, the sense of emptiness hit and you were dreading having to sleep alone. There was no need to turn any lights on yet as the evening sun still shone through the balcony windows and you kicked off your shoes. Before you could go and get out of your work dress, you noticed a folded piece of paper on the living room floor with your name on it. Frowning, you bent to pick it up and opened it, neat writing standing darkly against the white background.

'Go to the bedroom'

Heart skipping, you complied and rushed to the other side of the apartment. Outside the door was another note.

'Not this one'

You turned and went across to the smaller bedroom and walked in. It was a place you rarely went and you smiled as you imagined Levi had put these things here way before this morning, knowing that you wouldn't be disturbing the secret. On the pristine mattress lay a large black box, a huge bunch of your favourite flowers and a small envelope. With excitement you flew over and saw that the white paper told you to open it first. You ran your hand carefully over beautiful petals and followed written orders once more. The card within was simple on the outside, no design, no sickly hearts, just plain red and you read the words that lay within with growing joy.

'I love you (F/N), so much so that I can't even begin to explain it.

I'll miss you whilst I'm away and I know you'll miss me too.

So I've left a gift to give you something to think about until I get back on Thursday.

And don't fucking try it out on your own.'

Laughing at the parting line, you placed the card down and reached for the box with insane curiosity, wondering what could possibly be inside that you weren't allowed to use alone. Lifting the lid, you saw matching black tissue paper that was packed in carefully to protect the contents and you picked it out gently. Gasping, you held up the first thing you came to. Four leather cuffs, joined together with short, gleaming chains. You ran your fingers over the thick, dark loops and the strong shining buckles that served as a means to keep them tightly closed and pulled at the leather. It was strong, there would be no escaping them and you smiled at how many there were, imagining how amazing they would feel around your wrists and ankles.

Something else was in the box and you put the restraints down, reaching back in. It was beautiful, red in colour to match the card and so soft to touch. A simple yet effective negligee sat in your hands, totally sheer with a black lace trim. Attached to one of the straps was a small silk bag and you untied it carefully to look inside. The thick black fabric unearthed was shaped perfectly to fit around the eyes, slightly rounded in the two places that would eliminate all vision and the longer sides would curl nicely around the back of someone's head to be secured with yet another strong buckle. Convinced this was not what you had been warned away from, you placed it up to your face and felt how soft it was, how brilliantly it shut out all light. Much better than your usual silk scarf, you thought and stood nearly exploding with excitement.

A five hour train journey away, Levi sat at the hotel bar sipping at deep, red liquid. Glancing at the clock, he calculated that you should have found the gifts by now as you always returned home at the same time habitually, another sign of your need for organisation. Unless you'd gone to the bar, but he doubted it - even if you were intending to meet your friends, you would always go back to change your clothes first. He picked up his phone and dialled your number.

Back at home, you heard a buzzing from the bag you'd left in the living room and dragged yourself away from the delights that lay on the bed, running to pick up the call. Seeing his name, you grinned and pressed the green button. "Levi you dirty fucker, how am I supposed to sit here for three days knowing that's in here?" You laughed as you said it, meaning no offense. Hearing a small choked noise of amusement, you guessed he'd a mouthful of wine and just nearly spat it out. 

"You're welcome, (F/N). And I'm serious, don't get fucking excited and put them on. I don't want anyone calling to tell me that firemen had to cut you out." You laughed harder, shaking your head. 

"Ok, I promise."

Levi swirled his drink round the glass and smirked to himself as he pictured you going in and out of the second bedroom about a hundred times in the next few days, just to look. "Listen, I'll be back Thursday, should be home by half seven unless there's fucking delays." He heard your voice groaning down the phone with impatience and his smug expression increased; it was exactly what he'd intended to do, send you into a ball of anticipation that would eat away at you until Thursday evening. He wanted you to eventually be unable to think of anything else, expertly controlling your actions with one black box of gifts. The results when he returned would be amazing though, being that the brain was the best thing to put through this exquisite torture. Three days of tormenting foreplay which he didn't even need to be present for.

Your voice purred through to him and he realised you knew what he was up to. "Levi, you are unbelievable." Smiling with mischief, you moved to the kitchen to pour a drink. "And you know exactly how to tease me. I fucking love it." He took a gulp of his wine and raised a finger to the bartender, deftly ordering another with a suave air. Turning to whisper his response, he crossed his legs to try to curb his own lust. 

"I know, (F/N). Your filthy mind is easily manipulated. And I'm going to enjoy every fucking minute of it."

The conversation had come to an end not long after and without realising you were behaving in such a readable manner, you peeked into the spare bedroom to look over the items another time, hungry desire running through your veins.


	22. Rules Of Relationships

Levi looked down as you lay fast asleep, head on his chest and he sighed with contentment. He'd made it home sooner than originally thought and kept you up to date with his progress. It was nearly six o'clock when the man had finally returned home on Thursday evening and once he'd taken off his shoes and coat, he realised couldn't see or hear you and went through to get changed. The sight that had met him was beautiful in every way - you'd been laid on the large bed that you shared, new red garment in place and showing him all of your body beneath, blindfold secured tightly around your eyes. The other gift he'd bought had been sat by your feet, begging to be put to good use. He hadn't spoken, just undressed slowly and gazed across at your soft curves as you had remained perfectly still.

He glanced down again and thought he should probably take the tight collar from your neck but didn't want to wake you from your peaceful and well earned slumber. Earlier, he'd decided to pull out all the stops and utilise every single thing at his disposal on you. Why the fuck not? It hadn't been your usual mix of control - Levi had dominated you completely, taking his time to restrain your form with the new toy, teasing maddeningly with a combination of everything between feathery touches and intricate pain. Two hours later and the result was your now exhausted body pressed against him, breaths coming in long, regular sighs. Admittedly, he was drained too, however he preferred to lie and watch you, mind ticking over with images of submission and compliance.

You stirred and slowly opened your eyes. Gazing upwards, you locked on to the flashing silver orbs above and smiled. Every inch of you was in ecstasy still and you shivered slightly at the thoughts running through your brain. Fresh memories sprung up of being brought so close to the edge of orgasm on so many occasions, only to be purposefully left in a frenzied state of desire as the feeling subsided. The control Levi had exercised over you had been an erotic display of self discipline and the way you'd been commanded and instructed by his voice along with a variety of items added to the insane pleasure that had washed over you.

Yawning shallowly, you stretched and spoke in lazy tones. "How long was I out?" He shifted to see the clock, surprised at how little time had passed. 

"Only twenty minutes, (F/N). I thought that was it." You frowned and stared up at his smirking features as he offered you an explanation. "I honestly thought I'd finally fucking worn you out." Giggles sprang from your mouth and you coughed slightly, aware that you were naked apart from a tightness around your throat. Levi noticed the change of appearance in your expression and reached round to gently remove the collar. He couldn't abide the notion of causing you discomfort that you weren't one hundred percent happy with and carefully took the leather from your skin, fingers stroking against the slight discoloration that shone on your neck.

"I should've taken that fucking thing off earlier," he muttered, annoyed at himself for letting your sleep overtake your safety. "Sorry." You pulled closer to him and yawned again, getting more air in this time. 

"Don't apologise, Levi. I'm a big girl, I could have done it myself." Kissing your forehead, he placed his arms around you in a firm embrace. 

"Not likely, (F/N). You pretty much passed out straight away." His comment resulted in him receiving a slap on his chest and he laughed lightly.

You'd eventually made it out of bed, unsteady on your feet as you looked in the bathroom mirror. The redness around your neck was fading already but you guessed the collection of other marks that adorned your skin would take longer to leave. Fingers brushed against the forming bruise on your hip as you smirked, proud of the emblem that stood out brightly.

Nightwear on, you shuffled carefully through to the living room to find Levi uncorking a bottle. With fatigue, you collapsed down onto the comfortable couch, every ache and pain bringing back a spiral of pleasing thoughts. As he joined you, a glass was passed across and you touched the delicate items in a silent toast. Drinking in a slow, long gulp, you laced the fingers of your hand through his. "What is it they say?" you began. "Absence makes the heart grow fonder?" Hiding a smile behind his drink, Levi squeezed your hand and growled his own version of the adage. 

"Makes something fucking grow, (F/N)."

You grinned up at him and he placed a long kiss on your lips, an act of gentle love. The care he used made his brain throw out random thoughts and as he leant back to look at your peaceful face, one of the primary questions floating around in his head demanded to be let out. "(F/N), can I ask you something?" You hummed in reply, leaning against the soft cushions. "Did you know you liked pain before you met me?" The question didn't upset or anger you, it was a valid query and one you had no trouble answering. Shrugging, you looked over as he took up his own position against the padded furniture, your arms touching. 

"I guess so. I mean, it always appealed to me, a lot, but I never tried it before." There had been no ulterior motive behind his words, no hidden jealousy, but Levi couldn't help but feel lifted by the fact that this was just between the two of you and his eyes darted across your visible skin at the myriad of small red and purple flashes. You spoke up again and he raised his head, locking gazes. "How about you?" A small smirk played on his top lip and he reached out to stroke your cheek. 

"Believe me, I had some thoughts about it all. Serious fucking thoughts. But it requires complete openness and trust and I just never had any of that with anyone else." Laying your head against his shoulder, you sighed happily with your own feelings of joy at the way this was yours, one thing you shared exclusively.

~~~~~~

By Friday lunchtime, you were able to move around freely again, muscles no longer grumbling at you for making them work overtime by holding still in a handful of strenuous positions and you stretched out at your desk. You had company, a guest that had never been seen before in the extra chair. "Why the fuck do they need a summer party?" Levi griped, eyes dark and brooding. "Wasn't Christmas bad enough?" Absent mindedly, you ran a hand across your shoulder to feel the comforting sting it produced as you pressed down and you smiled. 

"It ended up being good though, didn't it?" Seeing silver shards glimmer, you continued. "And anyway, you have to go. You can't get out of it so just suck it up and deal with it."

Your words weren't aggressive or bitter in the slightest, just painfully honest. He knew you were right, but he wasn't going down without a fight. "You know that means you have to fucking come too, right? Have as little fun as I do?" Laughing, you looked across with exasperation at your lover, leaning close to him across the arm of your chair. 

"It might be ok, you never know."

Footsteps approached and you sat up slightly, watching as Hange came towards you. Her face screwed up in annoyance as she saw someone already occupying the seat next to you and she pointed down to him. "What are you doing here, short stuff? Don't you have a meeting to go to or something? Get out of my spot." He glanced up with playful eyes and delivered his deadpan response. 

"No. I'm quite fucking comfortable here, thank you. So unless you want to wrestle (F/N) for her chair, which I don't recommend, I suggest you stand." Unimpressed, she tried to push him out but to no avail, so instead, Hange sat on him.

You couldn't contain the loud chuckles that came from what sounded like the the pit of your stomach and pulled your phone out quickly to take a picture, just before your friend was sent flying with the movement from just one of Levi's arms. She didn't fall, just stumbled sideways, her own laughter ringing out. "Shit, I knew you were strong, but that was impressive!" Her words were met by a scowl filled with deadly intent and a slowly raised middle finger.

Smoothing down her dress, she noticed a few heads turning to look in the direction of the recent fracas and waved happily at them to prove she wasn't in the least bit embarrassed. Attention back on the couple sitting next to her, Hange began to chatter excitedly about the email that had been the reason for her visit. "So, how are you guys going to cope at the party? You reckon you'll manage to keep your hands to yourself this time?" A set of molten eyes glared up and she ignored the angry man, turning to you instead. Something flashed across her expression momentarily, but it was gone as soon as it had arrived and she continued to press you. "Well, (F/N)? What are you going to wear? Please make it something low cut so you can drive this one insane." Hange cast her hand over towards Levi and he stood, boredom on his face. 

"This is unbearable. I've got better things to do than listen to you talk about fucking clothes." As he began to walk away, a delicate hand floated up to your shoulder and squeezed, hitting it's target expertly and sending waves of delightful dull pain through you, eyelashes fluttering before you could stop them. In seconds the empty chair was filled again, Hange's stare fixed firmly on you.

"Are you ok?" The concern in her voice was soft but insistent and you had absolutely no idea why she was suddenly so worried. Brows furrowed, you met her gaze and held a hand up in question. This caused your friend to roll her eyes and huff loudly, like you were missing something blatantly obvious. "Don't play dumb with me, (F/N). You know damn well what I'm talking about." No, you really didn't and you started to wonder what the hell was going on until she leant forward and pulled the open collar of your blue silk shirt to one side. You snatched her hand away a millisecond too late and the damage had already been done. "For fuck sakes, (F/N)," she hissed, face red with growing rage. "What did he fucking do to you?" Sorting the garment, you got it back in place and reminded yourself to wear higher cut items for a while. 

"Hange, listen." Your tone was deadly serious and immaculately cool as you sat up straight, gaze never wavering from hers. She was slightly shocked by the way you seemed to have instantly turned into a hard, emotionless woman, no sign of the playful jibes that you so loved to share together and she waited for you to carry on. "I'm not even going to try and explain it. All you need to know is I'm safe and happy." Sitting back slightly, you retained your steely expression and glared over at her as she offered a quiet response.

"But after all you've gone through, (F/N)," she shook her head as she spoke. "Doesn't he know you've been hurt enough?" You knew she didn't understand, probably never could, but you snapped, frustrated at being questioned over your strength and ability to hold your own in a relationship. She cringed back into the chair as she watched you lean forward and as you delivered cutting words, she felt like it was Levi sitting in front of her. 

"I'm not fucking weak, Hange. I'm a grown woman and I'm in not in a situation where I have no control." Gripping tightly to your knees hard enough to leave red lines, you continued. "What, do you think he's going to get carried away? End up fucking killing me?" She had no reply to that, just sat with wide eyes that were tinged with fear. "That's not how this works. Go read a book or fucking google it." 

You started to calm down and guilt crept into your heart as you looked across at her slightly scared appearance. "Look, Hange. I'm sorry. I know you mean well, but I don't want to be challenged when you don't get what it is I'm talking about." Sighing, you softened your posture and shook your head. "It's probably best you don't understand. I don't want you to have a meltdown or try any weird shit out on poor Mike." Your friend let out a small laugh and you shuffled your wheeled office chair across and gave her a strong hug. Her arms squeezed you back tightly and you flinched, causing her to shoot back quickly. 

"Shit (F/N), I'm sorry." The smile on her face told you something completely inappropriate was coming and she didn't disappoint. "Did I just turn you on?" Laughing loudly, you slapped her hand playfully. 

"Sorry, Hange. That's not really how it works either." She pouted and questioned you again with slight annoyance. 

"But shorty did just now?" Her tone was almost whining, like she was extremely upset that she hadn't produced any sexual desires in you like he'd done when he squeezed your flesh. Smirking at the bizarre conversation, you explained vaguely, previously unaware that your lust had been so apparent. "That's because he's the one that did it." The woman nodded and looked deep in thought as she angled her head to try and look under your shirt again. "Careful." The warning you growled had no effect and she raised a hand to the fabric. 

"Can I just have a little peek?" It was like she was asking for a toy or something, innocence woven in to the strange request and you sat back and shook your head, causing her to groan in frustration. "Well, at least tell me something, (F/N). You said that's not how it works, so how does it? What are the rules?"

It was your turn to be silent for a moment. You didn't really have an answer to that, but tried to formulate one anyway. "I don't know Hange, it is what it is. It's not like we've got a fucking handbook. It's just us, we're not part of a club or anything." She laughed at the idea and got up to leave as you offered her your apologies once more, regretting the way you'd spoken to her before, but she shrugged your concerns away. 

"Don't be silly, (F/N). It's ok. Right." She surveyed her surroundings, eyes gazing across the office. "I've got a shitty meeting and then I'm going online." Knowing exactly what she would be trying to research, you placed your hand gently on her arm and looked serious. 

"Not at work, Hange. You'll get fired."

Relative peace had descended for the remainder of the day, a few visitors passing by but you were able to get through a lot of your ever increasing work load, feeling satisfied at a job well done. Packing your things away, you were aware of someone getting closer and craned you neck round to see who was coming. A grin and a fuzzy bald head approached with bounding steps and you smiled over at Connie as he waved. "Hey (F/N), how's tricks?" Stowing your keys and phone in your bag, you advised him that tricks were good and you were glad it was Friday. You asked how he was and the grin increased. "I'm great, thanks. Loving the power I have over people. I get to tell them what to do and how to do it, it's fucking awesome." Chuckling, you were happy to see his mischievous demeanour hadn't changed a bit and felt a pang of sadness at not being so close every day to the four men that you'd shared a small office with. Connie announced that he had to get going, a hot date awaiting him and you made him promise to give you all the details on Monday.

~~~~~~

Standing behind the bar, you looked out over the groups of people, drinks in hand and smiles on faces, enjoying their Friday evening. You had propped the front door open to let some air flow through as it was decidedly sticky inside due to the amount of bodies occupying the relatively small space. Your appearance had dictated a different kind of clothing choice, usual scooped t-shirt abandoned in favour of a standard round necked garment. The leather bracelets you wore not only disguised your scars today, but also the circular lines that had been left around your wrists. Maybe you'd gotten a bit over zealous last night, you mused as most of the day had been spent trying to cover yourself up. The thought didn't last long, though and was swiftly overtaken by the realisation that you didn't actually care.

An empty glass was pushed towards you with care and automatically you reached out to fill it once more, taking a sip of your own wine that sat behind the counter. "So what happened with that freak earlier?" Levi obviously meant Hange, but you weren't sure how he knew the conversation had moved drastically on from the initial discussion about dresses and parties. His raised brow pushed you for an answer and you gave up trying to figure out his ability to read you so well. 

"It was a bit awkward, actually. And I think I might have caused some trouble." Questioning eyes drilled into yours as he waited patiently for you to elaborate and you explained the rather strained conversation, keeping your voice down and leaning on your elbows across the wooden surface, chin in your hands. As you spoke, you saw a faint smirk dancing on Levi's lips which threatened to become a full blown smile when you mentioned your comment about a handbook. Taking a drink to compose himself, he offered you his thoughts on the matter.

"She won't be happy until she's able to put a fucking label on it (F/N), you know that. And I'm pretty sure that Mike may be in mortal danger." The way he spoke with such a stoic expression and stern tone made you giggle uncontrollably, hands clasped over your mouth to try and hide your reddening face. The man remained unmoved and sipped delicately at the red liquid before adding another comment that totally destroyed any composure you had left. "She's probably turned their whole apartment into a fucking dungeon already."

~~~~~~

By Monday evening you were glad to be back serving drinks again, away from your computer and away from the office. Hange had been unbearable all weekend, sending you questions and links to things you really weren't interested in at all - you didn't give a shit about the psychology, the 'proper' things to do, steadfast roles and parts to play. Levi and you did what you wanted and were more than satisfied with that. In the end you'd stopped replying to her and had managed to almost completely avoid your friend at work today.

It was a quiet night, as the beginnings of weeks usually were and you busied yourself with stocking fridges and making sure that glasses gleamed. There was no dark haired man to keep you company right now as he was currently in the gym and Ymir was working tonight but had been out the back for a while now, taking a call. The length of time she'd been on the phone was worrying and you steeled yourself for whatever fallout there would be from what was undoubtedly a massive argument.

You pulled your own device from your back pocket to check if Levi was on his way, having turned the vibrate off so Hange couldn't bother you. The only message was from her, though and you reluctantly opened it. 'So, do you guys do stuff like that every single time you have sex? Isn't it exhausting?' Sighing loudly, you tapped a reply in the hope she would shut up. 

'Hange, stop it, we do whatever we do, end of story.' You shoved the phone away again, becoming increasingly bored of her insistence, thinking how you should try to avoid any dirty conversations with her in the future. It was getting too much.

Hearing a door slam, you looked round to see the usual unemotional face of Ymir, but there was something different. Her posture was slumped in defeat and you hurried across with worry. She wouldn't look at you and her fists clenched in a rhythm of rage by her side. "Ymir, what happened?" No response was forthcoming, so you went and poured her a large, neat vodka. Downing half, she grimaced and finally raised her gaze to yours. 

"(F/N) she fucking dumped me." Your worst fears about the conversation were confirmed with her dark voice and you pulled her into a fierce hug, stroking her hair. After a minute or so she straightened, her face contorted in sorrow. Not wanting to press the issue, you remained quiet and let her explain at her own pace. "I don't understand (F/N), I know we argue, everyone argues. But it's only because we love each other so much." She shook her head. "Or I thought we did, anyway." Seeming open to talking about it, you asked a gentle question. 

"Did she say why?" Another shake of the head told you that there had been no satisfactory reason for the break up and you began to feel growing anger towards the small woman who had broken your friend's heart into a million, tiny pieces.

Ymir added a final thought. "We weren't even having an argument on the phone. It was a nice, normal conversation. I just don't get it." Before she could protest, you grabbed her coat and bag from under the counter and passed them to her. 

"You don't have to be working, Ymir. Get yourself home and call me if you need anything, ok?" Nodding weakly, she complied without words and trailed sadly out the door, passing Levi on his way in without acknowledgement.

A questioning expression met yours as he made his way round to you, placing a warm kiss on your lips. "What was that all about?" You frowned and let him know what had just gone on. As you spoke, he watched (e/c) eyes and saw the way your mental cogs were spinning round, flashes of plans in your mind. "(F/N), don't meddle in other people's relationships." A look of hurt crossed your face, taking offense to the wording. 

"I'm not going to meddle. I just want to find out, for my friend's sake, what the fuck that bitch is playing at." So, kind of meddling but more like information gathering. You weren't going to try and get them back together, just get some much needed closure. If Ymir didn't know why, how could she ever begin to move on?

Levi didn't bother trying to reason with you, knowing that if you were determined about something, you would do it, especially if it involved your friend's well being. An admirable trait, but one that could get you in more trouble than it was worth. Instead of talking you out of it, he gave you a tight hug as the silvery threads of a plan formed more solidly in your brain.

~~~~~~

The next day you sat at your desk, leg bouncing up and down with nerves. It wasn't the strongest adrenaline rush you'd ever felt and it was combined with fear, making it an unwelcome guest in your body. It was nearly lunchtime and you were ready to leave, bag on your shoulder and destination memorized. From what Ymir had told you in the past, Historia would be working at a local shelter, providing hot meals for the homeless. A noble cause admittedly, but it made you feel no better about her. The fear you felt was not due to the small blonde, more due to what she might say and how your friend would take to the idea that you had made this contact. But you couldn't let it go, the image of the usually strong woman as she stood utterly destroyed in front of you last night was too vivid to ignore.

As twelve o'clock rolled along, you stood and quickly made your way outside, taking the short walk down side streets to confront the petite woman. You were glad Levi hadn't tried to intervene, only respected your decision as he had done in the past. He did however warn you not to get into anything physical, fully aware of how deceptively strong you were. It wasn't a concern of yours, cat fights were really not your style, only using your self defence skills for just that - defence.

There were less people here than you'd thought there would be, only about fifteen of them gratefully milling around or sitting with plates of warm nourishment. It took you no time at all to spot the reason for your visit and as she noticed you, the shock in her eyes was evident. Good. No anger, no defiance. Shock was very welcome. Striding over, you noticed a familiar face out of the corner of your eye but shelved that curiosity for later, concentrating fully on the task at hand.

Your expression must have betrayed your feelings a bit more than you had intended as the blonde woman shrank back when you approached, face worried. It made you feel gloriously in control as you stared down at her with disgust. "W-what are you doing here?" Great opening line. You would have thought it was quite evident why you were here. 

"Cut the crap, Historia." Your voice was quiet but steady, almost commanding. "Have you any idea what you've done?" She hung her head, pure sorrow now on her features and it wasn't what you'd expected. Softening your demeanour accordingly, you spoke with a bit more warmth. "You didn't want to end it, did you?" A head shook from its position below your gaze and you frowned. "So why?" It came out in a whisper, unsure if she would even answer you, being that you barely knew each other. Sure, she'd been to the house warming and round at Christmas, but you'd hardly spoken at all. All you knew was that she was hurting and as her face looked up, you could see the anguish written all over her as she spoke in dainty tones.

"My father. He was so angry that I cut my trip short and when he found out it was for a woman, he freaked out. Told me to break it off or he would disown me. I only just built up the courage to do it now." Not knowing the relationship she had with her dad, you trod carefully. 

"But, Historia, surely you should be able to be with who you want to? Be yourself? You're old enough to make your own decisions." She nodded sadly and stared up at you with desperation as she almost pleaded. 

"I know (F/N), but without him I'd have nothing." She waved her hand around at your surroundings. "I'd be here but not working, I'd be the one in need." Helping others was obviously her passion, but she wasn't helping herself and you took her words to mean that she was totally dependant on her father financially.

The kindness that ran through you kicked in, knowing that what you were about to offer was perhaps not what she wanted to hear, but it was all you could do. "Listen, I know it's not much, but I need staff at the bar if you're open to that idea?" Her eyes lit up and her face was glowing with childish wonder as a smile made it's way across her features. 

"Really, (F/N)? But, I don't know the first thing…" Cutting her off, you held her by the shoulders and reassured her. 

"Neither did Eren, but he can make a cocktail with his eyes shut now instead of soaking me like he used to." She giggled slightly, a sound that would suit a princess in a fairy tale and you carried on, feeling distinctly like you were talking to someone much younger than you, even though you were probably around the same age. "You'll get the hang of it, no problem. But you do know you'll be working with Ymir? Is that going to be an issue?" Business mind firmly in place, you wanted to ensure this wasn't a massively bad idea. A vehement shake of the head met your concern and you trusted that she would do her best to make it work. That brought you on to another important point.

"I don't know about you, but I think it might be a good idea if she didn't know I came to see you." Guilt waded in and you offered more of an explanation. "I had fully expected to come away from here angry, Historia. I just wanted to protect my friend, but I didn't want to stick my nose in your relationship, you know?" Her smile was kind and she gave you a way out. 

"It's lovely how close you are to your friends, don't worry about it. And we can tell her I bumped into you and I asked if you had any jobs?" It seemed plausible and you nodded, your own smile in place until you thought of something - the real reason for the hopefully brief separation.

"What are you going to say about your father? And the break up?" She shrugged. 

"I'll be honest, I don't want to lie more than I have to and then that will explain why I wanted a job. Say I changed my mind." You decided to let her figure out exactly what she was going to tell her soon to be non-ex girlfriend and started to talk about when she could start at the bar. Once you'd agreed on a plan of action, she gave you a hug. It made you a bit uncomfortable as until ten minutes ago you'd been ready to rip into her, tear her down with harsh words.

Saying a brief goodbye, you decided to get going and noticed the young man who had caught your attention earlier. Instantly you recognised him as the only other genuine mourner at Isabel and Farlan's funeral. Nearly six months had passed since then and he'd become even more skeletal since you last laid eyes on him. Red lined orbs met yours and realisation flickered in his watery gaze as he approached. Track marks rested on his inner arms, a sight that made your heart heavy with pity at how someone so young had been ravaged by drugs and you stopped as he reached your side.

"Thank you." That's all he said, two words which held such gravity and sincerity in relation to giving a send off for his lost lover and you began to understand why Historia did what she did with her time. You wanted to help him, even if you knew nothing about the man and you had to nearly bite your tongue before you got too involved. Opting for the easy way out, you smiled and nodded in acknowledgement but continued out the door, feeling totally wretched at not holding a conversation with him.

That evening, you sat cuddled up on the couch under the fluffy blanket, laying tightly against Levi like normal as you sipped on your drink and explained what had happened. He couldn't get over how soft you could be and how vulnerable you looked as you expressed concern for a woman who, until today, had been top of your shit list. His fingers trailed through your hair, waiting for you to finish and when you did, he stayed quiet, staring into your beautiful eyes as he pressed a kiss onto soft lips. "You're so fucking adorable sometimes (F/N), you know that?" His words were whispered as your mouths still nearly touched, sending a feeling of desire through you. It wasn't rough lust, it was a warm almost tickling sensation in your stomach. Placing your glass down next to his, Levi picked you up and carried you slowly to the bedroom, an unspoken consensus between you both that this would be one of your rarer gentle moments.


	23. Commitments

Melting. That was how you were going to die, sitting dissolving in your chair. You tried to focus on the words in front of you, but it was impossible - the Wednesday mid-morning sun was beating through the large office window, killing you slowly with it's unrelenting heat. Grabbing a clip, you swept your locks up as far as possible, a few strands still hanging down your neck. It did little to help and you cursed the stupid, shitty broken air conditioning. You had a light airy top on but it was dark in colour, anything paler would have been too see-through to wear over your fading but still present tokens of passion.

Flapping at the fabric to create some kind of air flow, you wondered what it would be like come afternoon when the hideous orange ball in the sky was at it's peak and you turned to down as much water from your bottle as possible. Holding back the urge to pour it all over yourself, you picked up your phone, grumbling with discomfort. Winter was better, you decided. Snow. That was nice, not this fucking sweltering mess.

You saw a message from Ymir flashing and quickly opened it with a slightly nervous stomach. Her text told you that she'd spoken with Historia, the situation had been explained and she was incredibly thankful for your kind offer of employment. No mention of whether they were back together, or the fact that you had sought the small woman out, so you presumed the cover story had worked well. The matter of their status could wait, you would be there this evening with both of them on Historia's first day. At least you had fucking air con there.

Someone was coming closer from behind but you had absolutely no energy to even turn to see who it was, opting for the element of surprise instead. Fingers tickled across the hair that hadn't made it into your ties and you shivered, letting out a small squeal at the icy feeling. Levi swept past without even looking and you quickly glanced round to see if anyone might have seen. No heads were visible over the cubicles and you turned back to watch your lover stride away with a smile.

The clammy atmosphere in the office hadn't improved and by four o'clock you'd had enough. Bag in hand, you gratefully slumped off towards the lifts and the fresh air you knew was outside. The walk home was delightful, air flowing over you and making you feel human again. By the time you reached home, the dark mood that had hung over you dissipated, the feeling of euphoria at not being stuck to your clothes made ten times better by the scene you walked into.

Levi was stood by the open balcony doors in only his tight black boxer shorts, head tilted backwards, arms loosely by his sides. You laughed and spoke over to him. "People will see you!" He didn't move, just muttered his response, sounding like he was in ecstasy. 

"I don't give a shit (F/N), this breeze is too fucking good. That place was unbearable today." Giggles sprung from your mouth again and you walked over to place your arms around him, getting a face full of the lovely summer wind until he growled at you. "Go take a shower, you're all fucking sticky." Nice. Moment ruined, you slapped his ass but took his advice, knowing he was right.

~~~~~~

Historia was doing well for her first attempt at pulling a pint of beer, the head of foam still slightly bordering on mountainous, but it was a good try. Angling yourself behind her, you took another glass and tilted it, placing it in the woman's hand and making sure she kept it in position as you held it along with her. Unaware of what was going on around you, a laugh sounded out but you ignored Annie, concentrating on the task before you. If you had been looking, you would have seen the new recruit blush at how closely you were pressed against her back and would've noticed a look of pure jealousy on Ymir's face.

A better result this time, you moved away and let her try it again on her own, glancing round to see what was happening. Annie was holding back laughter and Ymir had stormed off to collect empties from the few other occupants of the bar. Levi stood on the other side of the counter, a rougish smirk on his face. "What?" You asked your question to everyone, oblivious and receiving no response so you shook your head with exasperation. Your lover had only just got here actually, having been out to run some errands, whatever that meant. You presumed it had something to do with the tea he insisted on picking himself and recalled that disastrous day you returned from the shops with the wrong brand. Anyone would have thought you'd tried to kill him, the way he reacted.

As the evening progressed, a steady stream of customers passed through and your recent member of staff had mastered the art of the pint. Ymir hadn't spoken to you, but that wasn't strange for her so you thought nothing of it. Sipping your wine, you sat on the stool next to Levi, speaking quietly over to him about how well Historia was doing. He remained silent and listened, thinking about how quickly your impression of the small blonde had changed. It was admirable and he squeezed you tightly to him with his right arm.

You'd decided that it was time to make for home at around ten and left the training session in Annie's capable hands. A light breeze still ran across the city, cooling your skin and blowing through your hair with friendly gusts as you walked home, cigarette in hand. The odd situation from earlier sprung to mind and you turned to the man whose arm you were linked to. "Levi, what the fuck happened before?" A small snort of laughter rang out and he smiled lightly at your confused face. 

"Next time you try and get frisky with Historia, make sure her girlfriend's not fucking standing there." Slowly, realisation crept up on you. Obviously, you'd meant nothing by it, but you should have known what the people you surrounded yourself with were like and how they would've viewed the innocent physical contact.

Slapping at his limb, you put on a horrified face. "You know I didn't mean it like that. You lot and your filthy fucking minds." Words grumbling, you shook your head at the whole bunch of them, inwardly aware that you were just as bad.

~~~~~~

The start of a new month was upon you and July promised to be even hotter than last year. It was Friday, the evening of the summer party and excited chatter had filled the office all day.

Hearing a grumble, you stuck your head round the bedroom door and watched with amusement as Levi studied himself in the mirror. You peeked past his body to gaze into the reflective surface. "You look fucking amazing, what's wrong?" He fiddled about with the dark but light-weight blazer and frowned at how casual it looked on top of his white shirt and black suit trousers. "It's a summer party, Levi. It's supposed to be relaxed and breezy, not a full on suit."

Still not happy, he stepped aside to look at your choice of outfit. Shaking his head, he smirked as his eyes took in your appearance, looking you over from top to bottom. "How do you always manage to make it look so fucking effortless, (F/N)?" Shrugging, you twirled to show off the full skirt of your purple tea dress. It was a deep shade, but you didn't do well in light colours so kept it summery with a necklace of delicate silver daisies and a messy yet elegant hair style. Usual dramatic black eyeliner was in place, with a small amount of colour tinting your cheek bones. You wore low heels on your feet, the same colour as your dress and carried a black and white clutch.

Pulling at his arm, you tried to get him to give in and just leave already. "Look, you can take the jacket off so you'll be left in your usual stuff, just without the tie?" He wasn't impressed, but your surprising strength yanked him out of the room. Before you left, he pulled you round into an embrace, lips touching yours gently.

"I fucking hate boats," he said as he pulled back, a grimace setting in over his face. "No escape route." Laughing, you took his hand to make your way to the party.

It was a luxurious river cruiser and would deliver you up and down the city's main water way in the mid July warmth, taking in all the sights. Standing on the outside deck with a cigarette, you enjoyed the moment of serenity alone as only a few people were up here. Most of the attendees were inside, party only just starting and whilst you could see them through the glass walls, you could hardly hear anyone with the doors shut.

You always thought drunks and boats didn't mix well, but the company had wanted to hold its first summer soiré and someone somewhere decided this was a good idea. Pulling your thoughts from the almost suicidal decision to combine alcohol and a deep dirty river, you stared out into the night, taking in the moon and bright city lights. It was actually quite beautiful, you thought as you felt a presence by your side. 

"Hey Connie!" You greeted your friend warmly with a hug before holding him at arm's length, a scowl on your face. "You never told me about your date!" He grinned and guided you back inside. 

"You can come meet her."

He led you to a brunette with an amiable face, plate piled high with buffet food in her hand and a wide smile on her mouth as she chewed with extreme happiness. "(F/N), this is Sasha," he said, placing a kiss on her full cheek. No way. Who would have imagined that throwing up on someone's shoes would've ended in this. You'd found out the woman's name whose feet had been so unceremoniously soiled at the Christmas party, but had no idea that was who Connie's date a few weeks ago had been with. Keeping it to yourself, you smiled over to her.

"Nice to meet you, Sasha. I bet this one keeps you on your toes?" You pointed at your friend, aware of his devilish nature. She just nodded, incapable of polite speech as her jaws munched hungrily on the food and her new man placed his arm around her waist. 

"She keeps me on my toes too, if you know what I mean?" The cheerful woman elbowed him in the ribs and swallowed, still looking at you instead of the cheeky man by her side. 

"Don't mind him, he's always joking. I'm sure you know that though. Tell me (F/N), how did you put up with him in that tiny room for all that time?" You giggled and shook your head, starting up an enthusiastic chat with her, telling stories that you knew would embarrass him.

Nearby, Levi had rid himself of the awful jacket and stood with champagne in one hand, the other in his pocket as a group of execs surrounded him. Why do they always fucking gravitate to me, he griped internally and cast his eyes across to where you stood, talking with glee to a woman he didn't recognise. By the way the bald idiot clung to her, he presumed she must be crazy. Anyone sane would not allow that fool close to them.

Moving his gaze down, he stared at your bare legs, imagining them wrapped around his body. It was an infinitely better thing to think about than the corporate drivel being spouted from the mouths around him and he realised that he must've been asked a question as silence descended on the group, all eyes on him. "Tch." Laughter sounded from the gathered men and he presumed that his response was in keeping with whatever the fuck had just been said.

You'd been there about two hours when Hange finally burst into the bar area, Mike in tow, searching for familiar faces. You had no idea where she'd been and judging by the male's red cheeks, you didn't want to know. She spotted Levi, but avoided him due to his present company, not about to interrupt the flow of conversation from superiors. Instead she made a bee line for you, Sasha still present and the older woman grinned like a lunatic as she saw a new person to get her claws into. Expertly, you slipped away and headed for the doors, grabbing another glass of champagne on your way.

You gazed out at the city again and felt a light touch on your arm. Levi's hair ruffled lightly in the breeze as his steely gaze looked out at the scene. "Looks almost fucking nice from this angle," he murmured, passing you another drink. You hummed in agreement and had to fight back the urge to lay your head on his shoulder. Tilting your glass up, you downed the bubbly liquid and placed the now empty receptacle down on one of the metal tables, turning your attention to the red wine he'd just given you.

Soft grey eyes looked sideways at you closely as he mentally weighed up his options. Looking down into the drink, he tapped his foot in a nervous action, clenching his jaw as he had an internal debate with himself. 

"Shit." You turned your head to see what had irritated him, but instead of the expected snarl on his lips, you were met by a small smile and gentle orbs that were flecked with brightness and he shrugged. "Fuck it."

Feeling an arm around your waist, you were pulled towards him sideways and you grinned - it was a surprising action, given that you were at a company function, but you didn't care. Finally, you were able to lean in and rest your head, unaware directly of the faces that stared out through the glass at the simple embrace but you knew there would be some looks coming your way.

"I'm pretty sure half the office is gaping at us right now, Levi." You said it lightly and there was no hint of regret or fear in your voice. He let out a small laugh that was so quiet, it nearly didn't exist. 

"No fucking doubt, (F/N)." Squeezing you in closer, he shook his head. "And I don't give a single solitary shit."

You had stayed standing like that for a while, sipping at drinks slowly and enjoying the cool night air. Fast approaching footsteps signalled the end of whatever peace you had and without looking, you knew who it was. "Oh my god, you guys! You have no idea what kind of shit is going on in there!" Hange was panting, having obviously run from wherever she had been. "Everyone's been talking, its the biggest office gossip since….since…" She couldn't finish and stood almost jumping on the spot, looking like she badly needed to piss. "And I can't join in! Because I know already! I'm so fucking mad!"

Levi raised an eyebrow and bent slightly to look past your body to the picture of rage that stood beside you. She stopped and looked over at the strange expression on his face; he looked calm, no hint of a frown or an offensive come back, just a tiny smile. And then, to confuse her even more, he winked before speaking. 

"Better give them something more interesting to talk about, hmm?" Hange's mouth opened and closed without speaking, not sure what was going on, hands limply hanging by her sides.

You wondered what was happening as well and turned to Levi, about to ask. Before you could, lips pressed onto yours softly and your eyes fluttered shut, body feeling like it had the day you shared your first kiss, tongues moving together gently and passionately. He had a firm grip on your waist and you slid your right hand up to the nape of his neck, left one pulling him closer.

As he drew back, palms remained in place and the smile was still on his face as you heard gurgling noises from the woman by your side. After all of the filthy, suggestive and crude information she'd found out about the two people in front of her, Hange had never seen an action between you that conveyed so much love and care. Muffled drunken cheers and shouts sounded out and you glanced over to see a few of your male colleagues making obscene gestures through the glass, presumably intended to mean something with sexual content. Laughing, you returned your gaze to Levi with a raised eyebrow as he spoke.

"If only they knew the things I've already done to you, (F/N)." Mischief laced the words as his expression turned into one filled with dirty thoughts. 

"Ok, ok, that's enough. I don't want to hear it." Hange stood with her hands raised in defeat. "You two have already taunted me with whatever the fuck you get up to, but this! This is too much. I give up." You had seemingly broken her with a simple gesture of affection. Looking up into Levi's eyes, you saw the glimmer within and he spoke gently. 

"I'm not even sorry, (F/N). You know I have a hard time keeping my hands off you." Grinning, you sighed and ran a gentle touch up and down his arms. 

"Me too, Levi."

The evening continued in a blur of people wanting to know what was going on, how long for, all the inside information. You managed to cope with most of the questions, dodging the filthy ones. At the Christmas party, you'd spent your time trying to get hold of each other in secret and now you were trying to keep away from people who actually now wanted you to get hold of each other. You couldn't win. Two women you didn't even know were clustered around you like clucking hens, picking at you for details and chatting maniacally. Across the dance floor, you saw the bearded executive that Levi reported directly to and how he spoke to the pale man, alternating between what looked like congratulations and stern words. Hoping that he hadn't got himself in trouble, you turned to see Connie materialise again by your side and you smiled.

You'd been watching earlier as he gleefully informed anyone who would listen that he knew all about the two of you and he was obviously enjoying being the one in the know, seeing as both Armin and Marco hadn't attended the party. "So it's all out in the open, eh (F/N)?" He nudged you, spilling a small amount of beer on your arm. "Hell of a way to make the announcement, if you ask me." It had been totally out of your comfort zone, and Levi's, but you supposed that sometimes self control couldn't always be exercised. The action between two people who were usually private about personal things had sent a message to everyone, thoroughly clear and it let the gathered revellers know how committed you must be.

The man who was the subject of most people's discussions swept across to you, nodding at Connie in acknowledgement. Gulping his drink down, Levi rolled his eyes. "Fucking shitty boss just gave me an earful about relationships at work," he grumbled, looking thoroughly aggrieved. "About how we can't let it affect the company or some shit. If it wasn't for the project, I think he would've been more pissed." The two of you had already proven your ability to keep work and play separate and now that you didn't need to have regular business related contact, it had evidently been deemed mildly acceptable.

You began to wonder if Hange or Mike had been similarly spoken to, or your friend and his date, but before you could ask, Connie spoke. "I can vouch for the fact that you guys are fucking awesome to work for." Not wanting it to all be compliments, he added a sly remark. "Even if it did border on inappropriate at times. I'm looking at you, Levi." The older man turned so neither of you would see his smirk as he vividly remembered the conversation he was referring to and you punched the bald male on the arm. "Shit (F/N), that hurt!" It was your turn to roll your eyes and muttered something about being a weakling, striding off to get another drink.

Just as you had started to think the night would never end, you saw the jetty approaching and eventually the boat docked so the pair of you could finally escape. Walking down the dimly lit pavement that ran beside the river, hand in hand, you noted how this city never stopped. People were everywhere, buses and cabs whizzed past on the road and boats moved slowly down the water. You'd managed to get away from anyone connected to work and strolled peacefully with a smile on your face. "(F/N)?" Levi's voice was soft and he looked down, not able to meet your gaze as adrenaline surged through him. 

"Mmm?" Suddenly he stopped and stared straight ahead. 

"Fancy spending the rest of your life with me?"

Still he wouldn't look round and you saw that this was probably the most exposed he'd ever felt in his entire life. Not when he was talking about his terrible past. Not when he was faced with your moments of fragility, or when he was at your mercy in the bedroom. It was now, next to you, asking you that question. Grinning ear to ear, you looked up at him and he finally met your surprised stare. "Levi, are you asking me what I think you're asking me?" He narrowed his eyes, but his lips twitched into a tiny smirk. 

"Of course I fucking am, you idiot." Giggling, you pulled him in close, both of you holding tightly to one another. 

"Sure, why not?" He leant back and glared, so smiling sweetly, you answered him again. "I would love to, Levi."

It was as unconventional as your relationship and neither of you were ones for following tradition. In your own unique ways, you'd taken the natural next step. He shifted in your embrace and produced a tiny black velvet bag from his trouser pocket, strings pulled tight to hold it shut. Placing two fingers inside, he pulled out a delicate shining object, small and perfectly formed and he took your left hand. The simple but beautiful ring was pushed gently onto your finger and you felt tears running down your face, unaware that you had even begun to cry as you gazed down.

"Levi, it's….I…..when….." You couldn't speak and looked up into gentle grey eyes. He placed his palms on your wet cheeks and for the second time tonight, you shared a heartfelt kiss. Days could have passed for all you knew, completely immersed in the moment, soul more light and carefree than it had ever been before. Finally, you parted mouths but they remained close and as he spoke, Levi's lips brushed against yours. 

"I fucking love you, (F/N)" You smiled and saw your lover had his own tears as he continued. "Thank you. You've made me the happiest fucking man on earth." Kissing him with a soft, quick peck, you pressed in to his body and held him tight. 

"You don't have to say thank you. I love you so much Levi. You're fucking amazing, you know that? When did you get this?" Holding your left hand up, you saw him smirk.

"Two days ago while you decided to try it on with Ymir's girlfriend." You laughed with utter joy, equally at his plain delivery of the statement, the fact that he hadn't been off buying tea and the feeling of bliss that enveloped you. He held your hand and you began to walk again, huddled closely together. You felt him look round and heard a groan. "Come on, let's get a cab. I can hear Hange."

~~~~~~

Annie was the first one to notice as you sat down at a stool in front of the counter late on Saturday afternoon, the woman instantly spotting it. Her voice cut across the bar and the blonde made you jump as she yanked your left hand across to her. "(F/N) what the fuck? Are you for real? Fuck me!" She rushed round and grabbed you tightly, laughing into your hair as you grinned widely. You hadn't even thought to text any of your friends last night or this morning, having been far too busy in the bedroom to consider anything more than spending time with Levi.

Thinking about it, you probably only managed a couple of hours sleep as you couldn't stay away from each other, but you didn't feel fatigued. Instead, you felt better than you ever had, body and heart completely satisfied. The proclamation of love from last night had added a spark of emotion that burnt strongly in you both, manifesting in the way you behaved physically. It all resulted in the most breathtaking, phenomenal sex, a mixture of gentle care and your usual fiery methods, but everything was heightened, every sensation magnified and you both shared a level of stamina that you hadn't thought possible. If Hange were to ask you how many times right now, you literally couldn't say, it had all blurred into hours of passion.

Snapping out of your daydream, you realised you were now standing in front of Annie, the hug finished, your left hand in both of hers and your friend's face centimetres from the ring. "Jesus, (F/N), you lucky fucker!" She was grinning and you reciprocated. "Did you know he was going to propose? How did he do it? Was he down on one knee?" Her questions flew across at you and Ymir now rushed over to see what all the fuss was about. When she saw the glittering band on your finger, she gave a rare, wide smile and again you were being pulled into a hug. Laughter came from all of your mouths and Annie grabbed you from the other woman's arms, demanding an answer to all the questions.

"No I didn't know and can you imagine him kneeling on the ground?" More giggles and you were being pressed to recount the whole thing in full detail. You complied and as you finished with the hurried cab ride away from Hange, the girls by your side had odd expressions, a combination of joy and disbelief. Annie was the first to shake her appearance off and shrugged. 

"Sounds about right for the both of you, actually." Smiling, you nodded, knowing you wouldn't have had it any other way.

Being early, it was still quiet in the bar and Eren came bouncing across having heard the story from where he stood. He hugged you tightly and looked down at the new addition to your hand. "Congratulations, (F/N)! When's the wedding?" Three women looked on him with dismay and Ymir was the one to answer. 

"It's not just straight away you know. They've got to enjoy being engaged for a bit." She nudged your arm and you flashed a look her way to suggest you already were.

By six o'clock it had gotten busy and Historia was also here, serving with growing confidence. She'd given you her sweet smile and a quick hug as she was told of your news, but kept her distance afterwards. It was fine with you - despite working here now, she was still fairly unknown to you and vice versa. She had given Ymir a light kiss on the cheek and it made you happy to see they were regaining what they had before. Levi appeared through the doors, striding across confidently, tight black t-shirt and dark jeans in place. He'd spent time at the gym for the hour that you'd already been here and you had no idea how he was physically capable of enduring that much exertion after what the two of you had been up to.

Strong arms wrapped around your waist from where he stood behind you and a kiss was placed on your ear. Before he could speak, the man was pounced upon by Annie and he accepted the squeeze she gave him. "You sly fox, Levi! Congratulations!" She looked ready to burst as the dark haired male just stared at her, lips curling up to betray his stony exterior. 

"Thank you, Annie. Now get me a fucking drink." She laughed and patted your arm. 

"Good luck dealing with that prick all your life, (F/N)" As she ran round to nonetheless comply with his request, his lips brushed at your ear again. 

"Can you deal with this prick all your life?" Turning, you whispered back. 

"Unquestionably, Levi. Both you and the one in your pants." He growled softly and you placed a kiss on his mouth.

"Oi! Since when were you two all lovey dovey?" A familiar voice came from behind and you both turned round to see Hange and Mike looking confused. 

"I didn't know you were coming over today?" you questioned, not out of dislike, but she usually announced her movements, a strange habit of hers. It was Annie who answered. 

"I text her to say to come down. I didn't say why, though. I'm looking forward to this." She stood waiting for the show to begin and the older woman frowned. The blonde pushed her in the right direction, initiating what was bound to be an epic reaction. "Check out her hand."

She didn't know what to expect, utterly perplexed and rushed round to where your hands laid on the arms that gripped you strongly. It started with wide eyes, then moved on to an open mouth and you heard a long intake of breath. Wincing in anticipation, you leant back into Levi, trying to shield yourself for what was inevitably on the way. And then it happened. A long, high scream rang through the bar, cutting over the music and conversations while you squeezed your eyes shut. Hange ran out of air in her lungs and before she could start round two, you reached up and clamped your palm over her mouth.

Everyone was looking over and Mike spoke loudly with apology. "Don't worry, it means she's happy. Nothing to see here." Slowly, the chatter started up again and you pointed to your friend. 

"If I let go, will you be quiet?" Your stern words were understood and she nodded fervently. With dread, you lowered your makeshift gag but to your relief, she obeyed and didn't scream again. Instead, she grabbed your left hand, gazing down with a slack jaw, then looking up to meet your eyes. 

"Oh my fucking god, you guys! When? How? Why?"

Levi leant over you with a scowl and you fixed your own glare on her as the man beside you spoke. "Why? What the fuck do you mean, why? Because I fucking love her, you dick." Hange's eyes brimmed with tears and she clasped her hands together. 

"Aw you two are just so cute! Angry, but cute!" Rolling your eyes, you couldn't help but smile and you felt his body move back to relax, chin on your shoulder.

She had been provided with the whole story, leaving out how you'd fled from her. Hugs were shared and manly handshakes exchanged. Once it had all calmed down a bit, Hange had you to herself when the two men left for a cigarette. "(F/N), I've been meaning to ask you something." Here it comes, you thought. Can't just have a nice, celebratory evening. "Does he like it when you hurt him too?" Good god. You were sure you'd left this all behind, but nonetheless, a gleam of filth crept across your face. 

"Oh don't worry Hange, I have my fair share of fun with him." She giggled loudly and held her hand up for a high five, which you heartily reciprocated.

A large figure approached and Erwin stood behind you, smiling warmly. He placed a kiss on your cheek and looked down with warmth. "Congratulations, (F/N). I just bumped into your new fiancé outside. From what I can tell, which is difficult to be honest, he is one happy man." You grinned and held his hand tightly. 

"Thanks Erwin." Annie rushed round and threw herself on her boyfriend, emotions touched by the joyous atmosphere.

Drinks were clashed into each other in random toasts throughout the evening and spirits were high. Laughter was frequent, as were adoring gazes, especially when Hange told everyone about what happened on the boat last night. It was odd for the two of you to be so accepting of the attention, but you were both riding a wave of elation.

Erwin stood, pulling a ringing phone from his pocket and frowning down at the unknown number. He excused himself and went out the back to take the call. He was here so often, you had no trouble with him feeling at home and you turned your attention back to your other friends, watching them all with a warm heart. Feeling a tug, you looked down to see Levi's hand arranging your top to pull it across slightly, covering up a fresh spot of purple that had been showing slightly. He hadn't sat down all night, choosing instead to stay at your back, arms rarely leaving your waist.

The large man returned shortly after he'd left, a pained expression on his face. Sets of eyes all looked up expectantly and he sighed.

"I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but that was quite a serious call. Reiner's been arrested."


	24. Helping Hands

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I'm aiming to get the last chapters posted today, get this one moved over. Hope you enjoy!

Everyone who knew the now incarcerated ex-marine shouted or spoke at the same time in disbelief and Erwin held his hands up to ask for calm, his face still pained. As quiet descended, he continued. "They posted bail, but…" His voice was cut off by strong, curt words.

"I'll pay it." All eyes turned to Levi, waiting for him to explain. He knew what must have happened and it was down to him. Well, maybe not directly, but it was obviously the fault of his only relative, Kenny. Jean couldn't have said anything otherwise Erwin wouldn't be stood here, he would be in a cell too. The ex wife was ruled out because if she knew what had gone on, you wouldn't be sat next to him right now either. So it had to be either his uncle or something unrelated, but fate would not have been that clement as to dish out something that wasn't connected.

From what he could glean from his previous conversation with Reiner a while ago, the large man had spoken to Kenny about his ex wife, you and Jean, however Erwin hadn't been mentioned. So Levi made the assumption that his uncle had been desperate, gone to the police trying to earn some money as the most shit informant ever and told them about the assault on your fucker of an ex.

All this had run through his sharp mind in the few seconds that followed Erwin's announcement and now he was standing explaining it all to the small gathered crowd. He felt you tense under his embrace, the mention of the disgusting man sending chills through your body. No one spoke for a while, as for some it was the first time they had heard of Levi's family member. Finally, Annie broke the silence. 

"So, if you get him out, what happens after that? If there's bail, then they must have something on him?" She was always scarily accurate at voicing what everyone else was thinking and slow nods were delivered at Levi with solemn faces.

The dark haired man had thought about that, too. "I know someone, a fucking good lawyer. I'll sort it." It seemed to be sufficient. Ymir returned to resume service and Annie followed shortly after, pausing a moment to make sure her large boyfriend was ok. Hange and Mike had little idea of what was going on, but remained suitably grave to match the situation. Erwin turned to Levi, gratitude and apology on his face.

"Sorry for shitting on your celebrations, Levi." He was met with a wave of a pale hand, dismissing the concern. You hadn't exactly intended on doing anything special tonight, the impromptu gathering had just occurred naturally. The time you'd spent alone had already been more than enough to mark the occasion. "And thank you." Again, the large man was offered a flick of the wrist. 

"No need, Erwin. It's my shit to sort." A huge hand laid on Levi's shoulder in appreciation and a look of understanding ran between the two men.

It made perfect sense to you that Levi knew a lawyer - the intricacies of corporate life meant that many paths were crossed over the years and with his eleventh anniversary at the company fast approaching, he had made a multitude of acquaintances along the way. When he'd mentioned it though, something had crept across his features but you couldn't place what it was. Perhaps this person was less of a friend and more of a last resort, but then Levi wasn't one for making strong bonds and you wondered if it was just the thought of having to deal with yet another human being that filled him with distaste.

Shaking away your musings, you turned slightly on your stool to look up into unreadable grey eyes. He sighed and reluctantly broke the strong hold he had around your waist. "I've got to make a call, (F/N)." You nodded, watching as he marched away to the room out back which was fast becoming the place to go if you had to use the phone. Levi scanned through the bright screen and found the name he had hoped to leave behind, pressing the green icon and praying it wasn't too late in the evening. His worry was quashed as the call connected after three rings, a crackling laugh greeting him with genuine humour.

"Please don't tell me you've got yourself into trouble again, Levi? Surely you're old enough to know better?" A faint smirk twitched on the lips of the man standing in the quiet, shelved area in your bar. He actually didn't mind the person on the end of the line, but would have preferred not to be contacting him, given how they knew each other. 

"No, don't worry. It's not me this time." Not sure exactly how old the owner of the voice on the phone even was, he asked an important question. "Are you still available?" The good natured laugh sounded through again along with the faint sound of a metal lid being unscrewed. 

"Of course Levi, did you think I'd retire knowing people like you were still out there?" It was natural that the past would be discussed, it had been years since they'd last spoken, but now was not the time. 

"No I suppose not. Listen Pixis, can we meet tomorrow?" Time and place arranged, Levi hung up, slightly lifted at the thought of seeing the cheerful but insanely clever man again.

~~~~~~

It had been an obvious choice for the rendezvous and Levi sat waiting at the bar, 4pm on Sunday afternoon nearly upon him. You'd decided to work today, partly to ease the burden on Ymir who was the only one scheduled to be here, but also to keep an eye on the meeting. Not that you thought anything would go wrong. The relationship between the two men had been explained to you last night as you laid together in bed. Dot Pixis, despite his odd name, was an excellent defence lawyer and had been responsible for getting Levi out of some difficult situations in the past, way before his current occupation and his trip to rehab.

Naturally his illegal activities caught up on him from time to time, but the older man had always made sure that prison was never an option. A few fines, some short community service, that was all that had befallen your lover. Having heard your share of stories from back then, you presumed that Pixis was as skilled as Levi had suggested and it was curiosity that had brought you to work today.

Glancing across, you watched as a dark glare scanned the surroundings from where he sat in front of you, a vaguely nervous foot tapping against the wood of the stool. The door opened and you saw friendly, almost golden eyes looking around, wrinkled lids giving the impression of a constant smile. A well kept moustache moved as a warm grin spread across the man's face and he quickly moved to give his old friend a strong squeeze. It never failed to make you smile when you saw Levi reciprocate physical contact with anyone other than yourself as it was such a rarity.

Initial greetings over, two sets of flashing eyes stared at you and for a moment you forgot you were standing on the other side of the counter. 

"(F/N)?" An amused smirk looked over at you, making you shuffle around with embarrassment. 

"Sorry, I was miles away. What can I get you?" Directing your question to the bald man, he locked his unnaturally bright gaze on yours and smiled.

"Scotch, please Miss." Grinning, you gathered them two drinks, wine for Levi, harder stuff for Pixis and you laughed inwardly at being called Miss. It made you feel really young, not on the way to thirty. As they walked away to the booth, a low voice whispered across to Levi. 

"She's a real beauty, that one." Smiling lightly, a response was delivered in a similar fashion. 

"She certainly is, Dot. Certainly is." Noticing the unusually wistful look that crossed the younger man's face, the lawyer grinned widely as they sat down. 

"Am I to presume that you were the one to put that ring on her finger?" Raised eyebrows told him what he needed to know and he laughed. "Congratulations my boy, good work!" Sitting back, he sipped at the brown liquid and watched his old friend, picking up on a softness that he had never seen on him before. "Look at you, Levi Ackerman. All grown up." Suffering the light jibe well, Levi shook his head with a smirk and took a delicate drink of wine before speaking.

"So how have you been? Don't take this the wrong way, but I did kind of hope I wouldn't need to fucking call you again. And thanks for meeting me." Pixis smiled, taking no offence at the words. 

"My pleasure, Levi. I haven't been bad I suppose. Keeping busy as always. There's a constant stream of lost souls that need my help, as you well know." Solemn nods were shared and sorrow passed over the moustached man's face. "Also, my wife passed on last year, so I like to fill my days as much as I can." Offering sincere condolences, Levi watched as the smile was back in place instantly. "Thank you, my friend. It was peaceful at least. No suffering."

They chatted lightly a while longer, catching up on the events of well over a decade's worth of life and finally, the reason for the reunion was brought into play. Pixis listened carefully to the situation, the presumptions that had been made sounding more than likely correct. He had, of course, known Kenny and what he was capable of, seeing his conniving ways first hand as they had manifested in the man that sat with him now all those years ago. Neither of them looked up as you brought two more drinks over in silence, both totally immersed in the task at hand. No move had been made yet to pay the bail, legal advice being needed before any action. Sharp mind working overtime, the older man nodded and leant forwards.

"Ok, Levi. What we need to do first is get him out of there. Then I can find out exactly what it is that they're charging your friend with. After that, we can make some decisions. Are you happy for me to take the lead on this?" A strong nod confirmed and they shook hands. "I'll make some calls, arrange the necessary. I'll let you know what the bail is, all money will come through me and we can sort transfers later." Business concluded for now, Pixis stood and gestured for Levi to follow. "Now, come and introduce me to your lovely lady over there."

The friendly lawyer had left shortly after you'd been officially introduced, making his way off to begin. A few hours later and some more calls had been exchanged, money electronically transferred swiftly. It turned out that the assumptions were correct - Kenny had indeed offered up information on the serious assault and apparently provided enough to warrant the arrest. But, as it would be unproven without the one who had been attacked, they really had nothing to hold Reiner on. And they knew it. Unfortunately the ex marine did not, was convinced he would be going down for a long time.

You had to admit Pixis worked fast and as you looked up, a large, tired looking Reiner pushed through the door. Without hesitation, he strode straight to where Levi sat on the stool and shook his hand emphatically. 

"I don't know what to say," he began. "Where did you find that guy? He's ridiculous, the way he came in there and ripped the police to pieces with his legal speak." A grin appeared on his face at the memory. "Looks like they knew him too, started shitting bricks when he walked in." He still pumped the smaller man's hand up and down, trying to convey his gratitude with the strong gesture as he listened to the response offered.

"Oh, they are well aware of who he is, believe me. And they're right to be fucking worried." Hand now liberated, Levi sipped at his drink and continued. "If they do happen to have anything concrete, he will find it and blow it out of the fucking water." Still grinning, Reiner nodded and looked over with thanks as you passed him a well deserved beer.

~~~~~~

Making your way through work the next morning, your stomach clenched with nerves. The looks and smiles you received from those few already here confirmed that the chain of office gossip was very much intact and people who weren't even at the party on Friday were well aware of what had happened. Not fond of being under scrutiny, you sank into your chair, longing for the confines of the small room you spent months working in.

The first of what you presumed would be many passing visitors approached and you thought how Levi would probably be immune to all of this; people tended to be quite attached to their limbs and had no desire to try and aggravate the grumpy director. As you turned on your computer and sorted out your desk area, the chair next to you was filled and you glanced up slowly, as if not looking would mean there was no one there. You were pleasantly surprised and locked gazes with a smiling Armin.

"Ok. Let's get it over with," you sighed. "How many different versions have you heard?" The small man's smile widened, blonde hair swaying as he shook his head. 

"About eight, (F/N)." You groaned and held your head in your hands. It was true that you didn't give a shit about people finding out, but you hated the attention that would undoubtedly last for at least a week, if not more. Armin carried on, speaking gently. "Three of those were all from Connie though, so I wouldn't worry. Everyone knows that his mind is horrific, no one believes him." Still hiding behind your fingers, you dreaded to think what stories the bald little shit had been spreading and groaned again.

The man next to you had gone quiet and you peeked out to be met with wide eyes and an open mouth. Armin gasped quietly and you dropped your makeshift hiding place into your lap, his gaze following your hands. Oh yea. You'd shamefully momentarily forgotten about the shiny object on your finger. He raised his head to meet your stare once more as a grin pulled across his mouth. 

"So, I assume that didn't happen on the boat?" Smiling back, you shook your head and filled him in with the correct account of Friday's occurrence and what had followed after you were back on dry land. Armin listened to the untraditional tale with a swell in his heart, happy that the two of you were content and gave you his congratulations. It was a word you'd heard so many times over the weekend, but it still made your nerves jump with elation.

The few hours before lunchtime were bordering on unbearable, your head spinning with the questions and requests for dirty stories. You stopped trying to put people right eventually, no longer possessing the energy to correct their versions. Not everyone noticed your ring, but those who did were filled with an even mixture of shock, joy and happiness. It wouldn't be long before that one made it round the office too.

Midday arrived and most people went out to enjoy the sunshine in their hour of freedom, leaving you in peace. Rubbing your temples, you reached into the padded bag that contained a sandwich you had bought this morning on your way to work, the design of the puffy carrier working its magic to keep the contents cool. Before you were able to take a mouthful, someone else came closer and you muttered angrily as you placed your lunch back down into the packet. With a sigh, you looked up ready to snap at whoever it was, but grinned instead. Levi looked as pissed off as you, if not more as he slumped heavily into your spare chair. 

"What is the fucking matter with people?" He grumbled as you took a bite of your food. "It's like having an office full of Hange, it's driving me fucking insane." You smiled, swallowing the piece of sandwich and replied with innocence. 

"Well, if you will go around kissing people in public, Levi…." He glared at you with a look of hatred that didn't reach as far as his eyes and you saw the flash of silver that always made you feel so alive. 

"It's your fucking fault, (F/N). You shouldn't be so damn irresistible." Fighting the urge to lean over and ravage him there and then, you took a deep breath and remained composed, deciding to change the course of conversation.

"Any news from Pixis?" Levi gratefully took the chance to talk about the more grown up subject and sat back, bringing you up to speed as you demolished your lunch. 

"They have some CCTV, but it's so shit you can't see what's going on really, let alone who the people are." He passed you his phone, a video file ready to play. As you watched, you could make out grainy figures, see a few kicks, but it was impossible to tell who the two men on the screen were. The angle of the camera meant that one of the large men wasn't even in frame. Giving it back, you looked up with slight concern. 

"Should he be sending you this, Levi?" He understood your reason for the question, but explained expertly and confidently why there was no need to worry. 

"Pixis is being paid by me, instructed by me on behalf of my friend and mutual client. If I pay for a service, I am entitled to be party to any material that pertains to it." There was a commanding air to his words, something you were all too familiar with. Any trepidation was now gone and you glanced across with half lidded eyes. 

"Stop it, Levi. You know that tone of voice does things to me." He shrugged, smug smirk firmly in place and crossed his arms over his chest. 

"Oh I'm well aware, (F/N). Very well aware." The last three words were delivered slowly and carefully, dripping from his mouth with nothing but smut.

The moment was interrupted by a cough and you both looked round to see Levi's boss, the man's large stomach yet again pushing the limits of the shirt he wore. You had no idea how long he'd been standing there, but acted on the pretence that he hadn't heard anything - it was easier to ignore it than try to justify the exchange. 

"Afternoon Sir, lovely day isn't it?" Levi had to place a hand over his mouth to hide the smirk that shot across his lips, styling it out into a pretend yawn. The exec smiled but looked flustered, unsure how to deal with someone who wasn't babbling a hurried apology or explanation. He ended up just nodding and walked off swifty. "Shit, Levi. You think that'll come back to kick you in the ass?" The man next to you shrugged, conveying the fact that he could deal with whatever was thrown his way.

~~~~~~

By half six on Friday evening you were sitting in front of the counter at the bar, Levi on your right, Erwin and Reiner on the left. No more words on the matter had been spoken by the exec about Monday lunchtime, but the two of you decided to keep your distance at the office and slowly the excited gossip had died down. Marco and Connie had been by earlier in the week with their congratulations and even Sasha had come downstairs to offer her own well wishes. She'd been munching on a bag of chips and hungrily eyed up the chocolate bar that lay on your desk when she visited, an image that made you smirk still. You wondered if the brunette ever stopped eating.

Tonight's conversation was fixed firmly on one subject. Pixis. The incredibly talented man was due to meet you all soon with news of his recent work and you sat nervously waiting, chattering constantly to relieve the stress. You didn't even seem to stop as you moved from one thing to the next and the sound actually made Levi's head start to hurt a bit. Glancing up, he caught Erwin's eye, a grimace on his face that told him he was also having a hard time dealing with the manifestation of your excitement. A hand pressed on your shoulder, and you looked up to meet a steely gaze. 

"Breathe." 

One word told you that you'd been talking incessantly and you muttered an apology. The man you'd been expecting appeared at your side with a friendly smile and gleaming orbs as he took your hand, placing a small kiss on the back. 

"Steady, old man," growled Levi, with no animosity whatsoever. "You don't know what you're getting into with this one." Slapping his arm, you shot your lover a disapproving look and turned back to grin at Pixis as he spoke. 

"Oh I'm sure she's as sweet as chocolate, Levi. Let a man have some fun." His wrinkled eyes had a smile all of their own and he looked so at peace with the world. You found it difficult to imagine him being a hard headed lawyer. He cleared his throat and you called across to Annie to grab him a scotch as he began to update you all. As assumed, the CCTV was bullshit, it wouldn't stand up in a court of law and without that, there was simply nothing left to charge Reiner with. Unless, of course, Jean came forward but that was doubtful. Coming to his concluding statement, the man swigged at the drink, placing a now empty glass down with triumph. 

"So, my friends, it's over. No need for concern. I'm happy to have been of assistance." He almost bowed to Reiner, thanking him with closed eyes. Levi watched carefully and understood why he was the one to be grateful; it had kept him busy.

Strong hugs were shared as gleeful faces surrounded Pixis and he accepted the words of thanks with dignity. He didn't linger long and pulled Levi to one side before making his exit. 

"Listen, my boy. You stay safe, hear me? Keep yourself out of trouble." A finger pointed to chastise the man that had once been so much more lost and naive. "And stay away from that uncle of yours. He's not a good person, Levi." He didn't need to be told twice and nodded back at his old friend. 

"I know, I will. And thank you. Take care." He offered his hand which Pixis took, but instead of shaking it, he pulled Levi to him into a one armed hug. 

"Look after that lovely lady, too." With a wink he was gone, walking off in the warm evening air.

Loud frivolity continued between the group of friends and at around ten, you and Levi managed to slip away. The walk home was serene and no words were spoken as you sauntered hand in hand through the still busy streets. A strange but not unwelcome feeling had descended on you both, unspoken communication portrayed by touches and looks. Closing the door to your apartment, you kicked off shoes and threw your bag down, turning slowly to see lust filled eyes gazing over at you. Levi picked you up suddenly and you wrapped your legs and arms around him to steady yourself. With a small smile, he carried you through to the bedroom, setting you down on your feet carefully.

He tugged at the hem of your top and pulled it gently over your head, unclasping your bra once it was exposed. Following suit, you relieved him of his t-shirt, fingers running down the contours of his torso and coming to rest on his belt. That was dealt with, as were his jeans and underwear, leaving him standing naked before you. Your eyes never broke their connected gaze the whole time as he mirrored your actions, crouching on the floor staring up as he pulled your clothes off. Returning upwards, he stroked the softness of your shoulders, fingers running over places that still bore the signs of your usual heated sex.

Neither of you had spoken since you'd left the bar and the way you stood together taking your time reminded you of the very first night you were together physically. Holding your hand, Levi led you across to the bed and laid you down gently, taking up position by your side. He moved over to kiss your parted lips, devouring you with delicate strokes of his tongue and he ran his right hand down your body, fingers resting on your wetness, circling round in slow, delicious movements, feeling every part of you. Reaching over, you took his erection in your hand, brushing up and down as both of you moaned quietly into your embrace.

Levi moved his hand away and shifted to lie in between your open legs, light kisses adorning your lips and jaw line. Gentle touches sprang up around your breast, his thumb and forefinger pinching ever so softly, causing you to groan out from where your head lay back on the pillow. His face came into view and looking down with love, he slowly pushed himself inside and you gasped. No matter how many times you'd felt him enter you, gentle or hard, it never failed to cause that reaction. It was such an exquisite sensation and you craved it, wholly addicted to him.

He moved with slow, deep thrusts and you curled your legs around him, angling up and meeting his pace. Your hands ran over his back, no nails, just tender exploration. Lips pecked at your neck, leaving trails of kisses across your skin, sending you crazy at the caring gesture. Moaning his name, you lifted your left hand to play with the soft fuzz of his undercut, fingers dancing over the sensitive part of his skin. The sedate, strong rhythm meant that you could feel every inch of his length inside of you, a new experience - every time the two of you had sex, regardless of whether you started slowly, it always quickly ended up in a frenzied pace, usually after being wound up so tightly from teasing. Whilst that itself was totally incredible, it meant that this ability to really feel all of him was intense and unknown, threatening to drive you delirious with pleasure.

The kisses stopped as Levi nudged his face against your warm flesh, whispering in to you. 

"Oh my god, (F/N). You feel so fucking good." He was experiencing the same remarkable awareness, almost like he was with you for the first time. Not raising his head, he reached up and lifted your hand from where it lay on his neck and linked his fingers with yours. Brushing his lips on your skin, he placed the back of your hand down on the pillow next to your head, still connected to his grip.

You began to feel a growing heat below, your abdomen calling out to you to tell you of what was surely not far off. There was no panting, no shouting and both of you whispered lowly instead, a combination of names and moans. The same languid pace had been maintained the whole time and you were on the edge sanity as you felt Levi touch his forehead to yours, passion in his silver eyes as they linked to your (e/c) ones. Hands were parted and you touched one another all over, gently sliding across skin with desperate love, breathing small words to each other as your peaks approached with every deep and almost lazy thrust.

"Levi, oh god….yes..." 

"(F/N), (F/N)… shit…" Eyes were wide and still connected and with seriously strong self control, neither of you increased the speed, mouths open in wonder as incredible release washed over you both simultaneously, bodies shuddering and voices groaning as the most astounding orgasm hit, sending you reeling. Moving together a short while longer to prolong the sensation, you finally became still and lips met with delicate love, tongues intertwined with care.

Levi pulled back for air and you lay gazing up at him, neither of you able to speak at first. He eventually broke the silence, tone wavering and shaky. 

"What the fuck?" You giggled breathily, running your fingers up and down his back and watched as a confused smile sprung up on his face. He pushed off and moved to lie next to you, leaving a warm and wet feeling to spill on your thigh. You didn't care and turned to face him, stroking his cheek with your thumb as his fingers rubbed your hip. 

"I have no fucking idea Levi, but jesus that was amazing." It was his turn to let out a tiny laugh and pressed a kiss on your swollen lips. 

"That's one way of putting it, (F/N). Shit."

He ran his hand through dark locks and collapsed onto his back and you curled up into him, pulling at the covers to envelop you both. Sleep descended quickly for you both, breaths soon coming in slow, measured sounds.

~~~~~~

A week had passed and you had been pretty much left alone by the gossip machine at work. Something else must have happened, you thought and gladly accepted the peace. Both you and Levi kept thinking back to last Friday night regularly. It would never be replicated, as it was something that occurred in that moment and would remain there. If you tried to recreate it, undoubtedly it wouldn't be half as good, as all of your physical encounters were unique, no two ever the same. No standard, dull sex ever graced your apartment - even the gentle moments were exciting as they were outside of the norm for you.

Despite still casting your minds back to a week ago, it hadn't put you off the more dangerous, familiar acts that your bedroom was accustomed to and you currently sported some bright red lines down your back, courtesy of the newest addition to your ever growing collection. You had no idea where he'd got it from, but the small crop that Levi came home with the other day had been a lot of fun already. Smirking, you thought about how you'd been the first to try it out, resulting in your lover not being able to wear white shirts to work right now.

Sipping your drink, you cast sharp eyes over at the people working, paying close attention to Historia. She was coming along in leaps and bounds, skills picked up quickly and her confidence growing. There was a funny look to the blonde this evening though and she kept glancing at you and back to Ymir. The two of them were working well together and you often saw some loving gazes and light touches between them, even occasional smiles. It seemed to be going good for the couple and the small woman had told you that she was able to live comfortably from her wages. Regret at being disowned by her father still sat heavily on her shoulders, yet the strength within her was apparent, determined to overcome.

As she stared again at you, curiosity within came bubbling to the surface and with a covert gesture, you beckoned her over. 

"What's up Historia?" Glancing round to make sure her girlfriend was suitably occupied, she turned back to whisper quietly. 

"(F/N), what clothes size are you?" A bizarre question, one which you answered nonetheless and frowning, she nodded once. "Can you help me with something tomorrow?" Not wanting to seem callous, you smiled but politely asked what, not sure what was going on. Historia returned your smile and shuffled some glasses around, trying to look busy. "I want to buy her something and you guys seem to be similar in size," she began. "And I need to make sure it'll fit." So you were going to be a substitute for trying on clothes, it seemed.

"Ok Historia, no worries." You watched as she refilled your glass with red liquid and pointed over at her, deciding that you were beginning to warm to the female more and more each day. "But no pink frilly shit, all right?" Her laughter sounded like tiny bells and you grinned as she shook her head, moving off to serve the next customer.

Sighing with a slight amount of apprehension at what you might be forced to put on, you tried to figure out what was in store for you tomorrow.


	25. Shattered Peace

As you strolled through the main shopping area of the city, bodies jostled you as the human traffic was in full flow, everyone intent on spending their well earned money on this sunny day. It was actually a bit too much, oppressive heat combined with the amount of people making you feel choked. The top you wore was thin and over sized, allowing air to sneak in and soothe your body, not caring that it meant your purple bra was slightly visible under the blue sheer fabric. You'd seen plenty of women wearing a hell of a lot less though and guessed that no one would care. The only concern that now crept in was that you had plenty of marks to cover and you were unsure what you would be asked to model. You wondered if Historia would be unwittingly dragged into knowing about your sex life and tried not to let it become an issue.

She led you into a large department store, eyes scanning until they found their prize. A selection of demure party dresses shone out, all of them sophisticated and you relaxed inwardly as it was made clear that you weren't going to be shopping for lingerie or something skimpy like that. You both began to run your hands over the items on offer, feeling a combination of silk, lace and sequins as the blonde chatted over to you. 

"I can't see Ymir in anything light or too revealing," she sang, hanging potential dresses over her arm as she went. "It has to be quite fancy though." Picking out a few yourself, you spoke back over, unable to see her from behind the rails.

"What's the occasion?" Hearing a small giggle, you poked your head round a hideous yellow gown and saw her blushing. 

"Dinner." It must be in a very expensive restaurant, you thought as you added a few more choices to your own heavy pile of cloth. "Ok, I think this is enough for now. Thanks again (F/N), you sure you don't mind?" Waving the dresses at her, you smiled and made your way to the changing rooms.

The private cubicles were vast and plush and had seating along one side. Historia took up position on the cushioned bench and looked over at as shoes and jeans were removed. You didn't have any problem undressing in front of her from a dignity point of view, however it did concern you about what was going to happen next. With a sigh, you dropped your top to the floor and waited for it. Nothing happened, no questions, no gasps at the collection of both fresh and faded bruises and welts, so you just carried on and pulled the first dress into place.

All twelve had been tried, discussions held on the pros and cons and two main contenders had been chosen. As you got back into your clothes, Historia frowned at the choice she had to make and mumbled across as you zipped up your jeans. 

"I always knew you would be a bit out there, (F/N)." Still topless apart from your bra, you turned with wide eyes and stared at the petite woman who now smiled across and elaborated on her comment. "You have an air of intrigue, is all. Something told me that under the friendly exterior there would be naughty streak." Laughing, you got your top on and sorted your hair in the mirror as you looked at her in the reflection. 

"I didn't know I came off like that?" She giggled at your words and made a decision on the dress while she responded. 

"Dark horse, I think that's what they call people like you?"

Bag swinging in her hand, Historia led you to another shop, assuring you that there was no need to get down to your underwear this time. She hadn't mentioned anything more on the subject of the perhaps deviant side of your personality and before you knew it, the destination had been reached. Staring down at the contents of the window display, your mouth went slack and you spun slowly to look at the sweet face next to you. 

"No fucking way?" It came out in a breath and you grinned widely as she shrugged and entered the jewellers. Using your finger as a guide, tiny hands placed ring after ring on, trying to find the one that best suited as she explained the plans to you. 

"I'm going to take her out for dinner first, then to her favourite place by the monument. I know she loves to sit there and watch the world go by, so what better setting than that to ask her to marry me?" You knew where she meant. It was right in the middle of a bustling hub of people, locals and tourists alike and at night it was lit up beautifully, a perfect place for the two of them and you asked her how long she'd been planning this. Prising a slightly tight band from you, she put one from before back on and studied it closely as she replied. "Since we broke up. Those few hours as an ex couple made me realise how much Ymir means to me."

The chosen ring was lovely, more chunky than the norm - Ymir was certainly not the dainty type and it would suit her perfectly. Historia had felt the need to explain how she could afford such a thing and although it wasn't that expensive in the grand scheme of things, it was perhaps a frivolity that someone just starting out alone shouldn't be purchasing. Her grandmother had given her some money to avoid inheritance tax, something her father knew nothing about and she'd placed the modest sum safely in a savings account.

As you reached the point where you would be going your separate ways, your hand was grabbed and you were pulled into a hug. It wasn't as awkward as before, both of you feeling more comfortable in each other's presence now as you got to know one another better. Historia gave you her sincere thanks and you truthfully assured her it was no trouble at all. She had decided to pop the question next month, mid August and you couldn't wait to hear all about it.

The apartment was quiet and bathed in the late afternoon sun and you gratefully took off your shoes, feet throbbing from all the walking you'd done. Hearing a sound, Levi emerged from the bedroom where he had been lounging with a book and raised his eyebrows. Neither of you had known what the odd shopping trip would bring and he was dying to find out. 

"So?" Impatiently, he waited for you to divulge the afternoon's events and you smirked as you remained quiet, moving to the kitchen to pour two glasses of wine, the day catching up on you. His voice growled by your ear, having somehow made it across to you at supersonic speed. "Don't make me ask again, (F/N)." The purred words sent shivers through you and the hands that ran over your body left electricity under their touch. Unable to give in so easily, you shrugged. 

"Empty threats, Levi. Empty threats." Knowing full well he loved it when you challenged him, you smiled as his palms moved up under your top, fingers sliding in beneath the fabric of your bra to deliver a strong pinch to your nipples. Trying to ignore the weakness in your legs and the fire that ignited between them, you let out a tiny noise. Dammit.

Levi wore a smug expression as he rolled your buds back and forth between his digits and he leant down to bite your earlobe gently, feeling you lean back into him slightly, breathing getting faster. 

"Are you going to tell me now?" He grabbed handfuls of your breasts, making sure to keep your nipples in the gap between his fingers and as he squeezed the soft flesh, they received their own tight pressure. Stifling a gasp, you smiled, remaining quiet. "Oh well." He was gone, grabbing his glass, leaving you standing alone in the kitchen.

You rearranged your clothing and joined him on the couch. As you sipped your drink, (e/c) eyes met flashing grey ones and you smirked - he was behaving exactly as you'd planned and you grew more and more excited with every passing second of silence, knowing if you kept the story to yourself it would undoubtedly mean trouble. Levi was acutely aware of what you were up to and loved you that little bit more for it. Crossing his legs and laying his arm casually over the back of the seat, he stared, imagining all the things he would do to you. It was still early. You had plenty of time to tease each other and he knew it would probably be hours before he would actually give in and fuck you senseless.

He was no longer interested in what had gone on today between you and Historia, focussed solely on your body and the array of items stashed in your bedroom. Feeling a stirring in his trousers, he shifted slightly to relieve the discomfort of pressure and you observed him moving with devilish pleasure. Levi might have his own thoughts on how this would go, but unbeknownst to him, you had no intention of submitting. It was going to be deliciously fun.

~~~~~~~

Levi watched as you practically skipped through to the kitchen to refill your glasses. It was nearly 8 in the evening and he sat back on the couch, still trying to catch his breath. You brought drinks back over, a smug smile on your face at the knowledge that it was you who had made him beg this time, you who had secured him tightly and you who had eventually broken your cool and ridden him roughly into ecstasy. Not that you weren't without your own array of new trophies, but you knew that ultimately, you had been in charge. It wasn't an anomaly, had happened many times before, but this time you'd been relentless and the buzz of pleasure still ran through your veins as you sank down into the soft seat. Levi began to speak and you held up a finger to your lips, smirking over at the slightly flushed face next to you. 

"Remember, you have to ask nicely if you want to address me."

He shook his head and smiled behind his drink, gulping deeply at the liquid. You could be a demon when you wanted to and he watched as you threw your head back with laughter, totally in love with the woman that sat with him. Once you'd composed yourself, you spoke almost nonchalantly, like the conversation was just picking up from where it began over three hours ago.

"So, Historia wanted me to try dresses on." Levi choked as a snort of laughter overtook him, swallowing his wine quickly. The way you delivered your words like nothing had happened was ridiculously funny and he bowed his head, rubbing the back of his hand across his mouth like it was itchy to hold back the laughs that pushed at his lips. Grinning, you continued, watching as he had his internal struggle. Story over, Levi digested it all. He had especially enjoyed the part about your inner personality being outed, but the rest was slightly dull to him, not through dislike, just an honest disinterest in people. Holding you close, he kissed the top of your head, both of you enjoying the warmth of each other's bodies.

~~~~~~

It was the day after Ymir and Historia's epic date and you grew impatient as the hours of Sunday ticked by, drumming your nails against the wooden counter as evening slid in. You were working alone today, as Annie and Erwin had gone on a long weekend away and the couple you waited for were supposed to be taking over soon. Levi grumbled across darkly. 

"Stop that, (F/N), it's going straight fucking through me." Sticking your tongue out, you scowled but ceased your incessant clicking noise and he sighed, happy to be left in relative peace.

The doors opened and two smiling faces appeared. Bolts of adrenaline ran through you, but on the outside you stayed the same, not wanting to give it away that you were party to last night's events. As they walked in behind the bar, you casually turned, trying to stop yourself from looking down at your friend's hand.

"So what's new?" Ymir grinned widely back and punched you lightly on the shoulder. 

"Like you didn't know, (F/N)" she chided and held up the familiar ring that sat on her finger perfectly. Hugging tightly, you squealed with joy, trying not to release the inner Hange. A voice whispered into your ear as you continued the embrace. "Thanks for helping her out." Squeezing tight, you conveyed that it was your pleasure.

Breaking apart, you turned to Historia and gave her a similar cuddle. 

"Congratulations," you said. "Was it amazing?" She pulled back and stared up at you. 

"Incredible." That's all she needed to say and her eyes filled with tears at the memory, Ymir by her side in seconds to wipe them away. Leaving them to enjoy their moment, you looked over to Levi, bored expression in place and eyes half shut. Smacking his hand gently, you leant over on your elbows. 

"You're such a grumpy ass, you know?" His gaze flicked to meet yours and his top lip twitched into smirk. Directing his voice to the couple behind the counter, he spoke without emotion, but the genuine nature of his words were clear. 

"Best wishes to you both." It was about all he could handle and sat up, looking around with a sigh. The two women smiled, accepting the man's stoic expression of joy.

~~~~~~

The unbearable heat of summer had finally given way to the cooler, fresher month of September, something that made you happy on so many levels. There was no desire to shower every ten minutes anymore, no clothes sticking to you and the joy of a breeze that caused goosebumps ran over your skin as you walked to work on a Thursday morning. Levi was by your side and listened as you grumbled about a stomach ache, something that had been niggling away at you for a few days. Rarely one to complain about random pains, you felt annoyed with yourself for ruining a perfectly nice morning with what was probably just one of those things. You felt an arm around your shoulders squeezing tightly and you smiled, pushing the faint discomfort to the back of your mind.

You sipped on coffee at your desk, occasionally twitching a bit as the feeling in your lower abdomen made itself known again. It wasn't that time of the month, you were sure of it, as taking the pill for as long as you had done meant that in the event of the apocalypse, you could probably create an accurate calendar from the monthly occurrences. Also, it wasn't so much of a crampy pain, more of a stabbing one that was both sharp and dull at the same time. Maybe you'd pulled a muscle, or eaten something that didn't agree with you? Trying to forget about it, you turned to your screen with a scowl.

By the time 10.30 approached it was getting worse, increasing to the point that you were now sitting forwards in your chair, hand on the sea of pain that ran the whole width of your body just beneath your belly button. You'd emailed Hange, asking if she would come over and as she sat down next to you, she saw exactly why you had asked for her. Your skin was pale, drained of all colour and had a slight sickly sheen across it. The way you sat doubled up was concerning too and she reached out to place a hand on your head. Jumping back, she frowned. 

"(F/N), you're burning up! You need to get home, take some painkillers, get some rest." Nodding, you knew she was right and reached over to call a cab - it was only a short walk, granted, but you doubted you'd be able to make it. Whilst you spoke on the phone, Hange had taken her own device out, sent a quick message and within thirty seconds, Levi was now by your side, worry etched on his face.

"Shit (F/N)," he said, not able to really add much more than that as he took in your wretched appearance. Crouching down, he rubbed a hand across your back in soothing circles as Hange packed your things away for you. Feeling hands on each arm, you were pulled gently up and the two of them led you slowly to the lifts. Huffing, you tried to straighten, attempting to show them that you were more than capable of walking on your own, however it was a major error. Hot stabs of pain ran through your body and you hissed out between clenched teeth in agony. "Just let us help." The soft tone of your lover sounded at your ear and you reluctantly but gratefully placed your arm around his shoulders as his held you strongly around the waist. Hange continued to hold you too as she pressed the button to call your ride to the ground floor. As the doors opened, she gave you a stern look and told you to let her know when you got home and Levi accompanied you down, glancing across with concern. He waited with you for the taxi to arrive and helped you in. "Rest. I mean it. No fucking about." A light kiss was placed on your lips and you watched him stare after the car as you were driven away.

Once you had made it inside and taken some tablets, you clambered onto the bed, work clothes still on, curling up in a ball to try to lessen the increasing hurtful waves and sent a quick message with shaking hands to the two you had just left behind. Unable to do much else, you closed your eyes and soon the stress that had been inflicted on your body meant that you fell into a troubled sleep.

The grips of the fever overtook you an hour later and you were somewhere between slumber and reality. Your head tossed around on the bed as you tried to surface out of the delirium, strings of hallucinations pulling at your sanity. Mumbling nonsense, you threw your arms up to protect yourself from the imaginary beasts that tried to attack you, vividly seeing them picking at your stomach with claws and teeth. You may have shouted out at some point, but had little idea of where you were let alone what you were doing. Time was unknown to you and at some point a lucid moment crept in and the feeling of sweat soaked sheets and clammy skin brought you gasping into the here and now. Yelling at the wrenching in your pelvis, you realised something was seriously wrong. Instinctively, you looked down, expecting to see blood but your green dress was unmarred and in your clouded state you mentally ruled out the grim possibility of a miscarriage. With what little strength you retained, you felt around the bed for your phone and dialled as panic set in.

Seeing your name flash up on the screen, Levi pressed the green button and listened closely as he heard your whispering voice. You were making little sense, yet it was abundantly clear just how much pain you were in, words coming out in choked sobs that were laced with fear. Talking over you quietly but carefully, he began to grab his things and sent a quick email to Hange. 

"Listen to me, (F/N). Listen to my voice, don't think about anything else. I'm coming, ok? I'll be there soon. Stay on the line." Hiding his own horror, he continued to speak as he reached the main entrance and then ran the short distance to your apartment. He found you tangled up in the bed sheets, phone now on the floor, moans of pain sounding loudly out in the room. Beads of sweat were all over your skin, clothes soaked and your eyes were squeezed shut as a grimace of despair contorted your features. He made no hesitation and called for an ambulance.

The paramedics had instantly got you into their vehicle, wasting no time and as they sped to hospital, Levi by your side holding your hand tightly, muttering words in your ear. One of the medics was arranging pain relief and taking vitals, hands moving quickly and expertly to do everything they could to make the journey more comfortable for you. Worry picked away at your lover as he tried to imagine what the hell was going on to have this effect on you and he looked over at just how pale you were. Your face was no longer scrunched up in agony and you lay with your eyes shut and mouth slightly open. That was more concerning though and he watched as your lids moved like you were dreaming. Now and again, the hand he held would squeeze back weakly, almost trying to make sure he was still there and the man returned your gestures.

It felt like hours and eventually the ambulance pulled into the hospital, your figure carefully but quickly wheeled in to the emergency department. A few questions were asked and Levi did his best to explain, recounting the few days of mild pain that you'd experienced, culminating in the feverish state he'd found you in. A series of swift tests and prods were carried out and serious nods shared. One of the nurses placed a needle in the back of your left hand and strapped it down with surgical tape, attaching tubes to the two ports on the plastic cannula.

"Sir we have to take her in now, she's more than likely bleeding internally." Levi just stared as he saw another medic talking gently to you and injecting a white substance into one of the tubes. He couldn't move, couldn't speak and just gripped tightly to your free hand, not wanting to leave your side for one second. Bleeding internally, what the fuck? A strong pressure was applied to his arm as one of the staff moved him gently but firmly to one side as you were pushed in the opposite direction. He fought back the urge to punch the man holding him and clenched his fists, jaw shut tightly, lips almost disappearing into a thin line across his face.

"I'll take you to the family room," began the nurse, but he was cut off by the steely glare that pinned him in place and the low growl of a voice that sounded in his ears. 

"Don't touch me." Removing his hand, the man nodded, all too familiar with the emotions that came with relatives and quietly showed the pale and fury filled gent to the overly cheery room. There were plastic flowers everywhere, no doubt serving just to collect dust and a stack of shitty lifestyle magazines that were about four months old.

Unable to sit, Levi pulled out his phone and made a call. It was answered instantly, strained voice sounding through with concern. 

"What's going on, is (F/N) ok?" He sighed and ran a shaking hand across his forehead. 

"No Hange, she's fucking not. We're at the hospital. They've taken her to fucking surgery, something about internal bleeding." Silence descended apart from the sound of his shoes across the floor and a faint sniff on the other end of the line. 

"Oh my god, Levi, I'm so sorry. Can I do anything?" When she spoke, it was with a quiet and thick voice full of tears. The last thing he needed was her here. Having Hange at the end of the phone was close enough for his frayed nerves, but he had wanted to keep her updated.

"No it's all right. I'll let you know what the fuck is going on when I have a clue myself." He remembered something and asked for a favour. "Can you contact those shits I'm supposed to be meeting in an hour, tell them to fuck off." She agreed gladly, but would be amending the terminology when she let the men know. Ending the call, Levi shoved the phone back in his pocket and resumed his circular journey around the room, the calm of recent months shattering around him to reveal stark reality.

From the moment that the paramedics had arrived, faint flashes and snippets of people, things and places flew across your blurred line of vision and the only thing you were sure of was that Levi was with you the whole time, holding your hand and speaking softly. It made you feel safer knowing that you were no longer alone, but the debilitating fever allowed you little more in the way of clarity, having no idea what was going on. The last things you remembered were being told to count backwards from ten, the grip of you lover disappear and then there was nothing.


	26. 365

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here we go, the last chapter. It is a bit fast moving in terms of time frames however the chapter title meant that I had to shift the story along, hope you enjoy!

Levi paced across the clean floor in the small, soulless room feeling totally useless, his nerves alight as he fiddled with the leather band around his wrist. They'd taken you to surgery straight away and nobody had told him exactly what they thought was going on. He just had to trust that they had seen enough to know what the problem was and that it could be fixed. The wait was killing him, eating away at his entire being and he hated that he had no control in the situation, leaving the life of the woman he loved in someone else's hands.

Another slow, excruciating thirty minutes ticked by and he jumped as the door flew open to reveal a figure clad in blue hospital robes. The male member of staff advised him that you were in recovery in a private room; there had been some complications, but you were ok. He continued to speak but Levi heard none of it as he was led down a maze of corridors and into the dimly lit space that was occupied by a white, mechanical bed and a myriad of machines. Underneath a thin sheet lay your prone body, cables running from the cannula in the back of your hand. It was almost enough to send him slumping to the floor, yet he remained steady as the man spoke to him again.

"She should be coming round soon. Once she's awake, I'll be back to let you both know what's happened. For now, just let her rest and wake up at her own pace." What Levi presumed was the surgeon left the room and he moved to sit by the bedside, stroking your serene yet pallid face gently. Minutes slowly dragged by, the beeps of machines sending needles into his ears every time one of them chimed. A nurse entered, looked at the charts and checked one of the incessant pieces of technology. Before she left, she shot him a look and he could have sworn he heard a tut. Brushing it aside, he leant back over to stare at you, watching the steady deep breaths lifting your chest. As you were covered in the fabric, he couldn't see a sign of any kind of procedure that would even begin to tell him what had happened.

Glancing around, he noticed one of the tubes that ran into the contraption on the back of your left hand contained blood, the pack sitting high up on its metal perch. That couldn't be good. His eyes ran over all the other things and saw that morphine ran down the other plastic line. One screen seemed to show blood pressure but was dormant, only displaying the last reading - he wasn't an expert, but knew it was low.

Soft light and an annoying pinging noise. That's all you were aware of to start with and then the sensation of pain in one hand, gentle grip in the other. You squeezed and a worried face appeared in your line of vision. Still groggy from what you presumed was anaesthetic, you mumbled up to Levi incoherently. A fleeting kiss was placed on your dry lips and you were greeted by a tiny smile as he drew back. You turned your head to the right so you could see him properly and he sat back down on the near by chair.

"I don't know what happened, (F/N). You've been in surgery and the doctor's coming back soon to talk to us." Surgery? Shit, what the hell? Pushing weakly, you tried to sit up with a pillow behind you for support and with help, you managed. You were able to croak a small request for water and it was complied with instantly. The sensation of the liquid he poured carefully in your mouth was divine, such a simple thing causing so much enjoyment. The cloud in your mind slowly began to clear and a nurse popped her head around the door and smiled at you, then scowled at Levi. She rushed over and began fussing, smoothing your hair and straightening out the hospital gown you wore. A cuff was placed on your upper arm and you felt it tighten with a buzz as it took measurements. Numbers flashed up on the machine and the nurse's lips formed a line on her face as she noted numerals down on a chart.

"I'll tell the consultant you're awake, honey." She swept out of the room and you turned to the man sat next to you. 

"What the hell, Levi?" Your voice came out in whispers and the grip on your hand increased. He shrugged and told you the rest of what little he knew.   
"We've been here three hours, you were in surgery for half of that. They said there were complications but you're ok. Is there any pain?" Grey eyes looked over you closely and you moved a bit under the sheets, feeling a slight twinge on either side of your abdomen, but nothing as horrendous as earlier in the day. You didn't really want to look under the gown, afraid of what you might see and before you could build up the courage, the door opened again and a man in blue walked through.

He began to gently tell you exactly what had happened, however you found it hard to take it all in. Luckily your lover was fully alert and listened intently, his hand clutching yours with ever growing strength. You heard words, not able to connect any of them in a coherent manner. Cysts. Ruptures. Internal bleeding. Life threatening. Keyhole. Loss. In your clouded state, you were aware that it had gone quiet and two gazes were trained on you. 

"What?" The slow realisation filtered through to your drugged mind. "You're saying what?" It seemed surreal, like someone else was in control of your mouth and you were looking through someone else's eyes as the surgeon repeated his macabre punchline. 

"We had to remove one of your ovaries and the other is severely damaged."

Still not fully aware of the how or why, you rubbed your head and felt a pull as the needle in the back of your hand protested at the tug. It would be very difficult for you to ever have children naturally. This fact didn't bother you like you thought it might do - no apparent maternal instinct lay within you as far as you knew and if you were shown a picture of a baby, you didn't go all gooey eyed and get broody. The idea of something sentient growing inside of you really didn't appeal, losing control of your body to something else. You supposed it was what would be expected of you in the not too distant future, but honestly, you weren't interested in it. What did bother you was how Levi would feel. Sure, he barely tolerated adults let alone uncontrollable, unsanitary children, however seeing as you'd never spoken about it, you couldn't be sure.

You were fully aware that you may feel differently later in life, or even when the morphine left your system, but right now it was ok. Slightly surprised by your instant acceptance, you realised the two men were still staring at you. Unable to do anything significant, you nodded slowly. 

"I know it's a lot to take in." The man in blue spoke again, stating the obvious. "I'll leave you to be alone for a bit. Rest up and I'll speak with you later." He left with a bowed head and you sighed as you turned to Levi. 

"Can you tell me what the fuck he just said?" The odd feeling of narcotics was clearing and your usual personality began to break through. With hushed tones, your lover explained. Something called apoplexy had occurred due to ovarian cysts and they'd ruptured, causing a haemorrhage which in turn resulted in your fever, pain and blood loss. The medics had initially thought of appendicitis, but once the two small incisions were made and tiny cameras inserted, it became clear there was something more sinister. Two more cuts had been needed and the only option to one of the damaged areas was removal - no alternative existed and your remaining ovary was scarred but not destroyed. The cause for this in your case was unknown, it was really just something that life threw at some women at random.

As he finished, you sat in silence, wondering what was running through Levi's head, dread creeping over you with prickles of ice. With a heavy heart, you turned and opened your mouth to speak, only to be stopped by a kiss. 

"Don't even fucking think about apologising (F/N)," he started, voice soft. "All I want is you." He meant his words sincerely. Thoughts of children had never crossed his mind, other than disgust on the odd occasion that one had been thrust in his face by a gleeful colleague when they brought their new offspring to work, pride flowing from them as strongly as the smell from the baby.

And there was the selfish aspect. He didn't want to share you. Also, there was the elephant in the room that was both of your drinking habits. Granted, the two of you had cut down a bit recently through no conscious effort, but it was still definitely a major issue when taking into consideration the want to procreate. A worry did chew at his soul, though. Did you want to have children? You had never brought it up so he presumed not, but it was always a bad idea to assume.

Watching him closely, you saw how he was deep in thought as the same expression crossed his face that you imagined had recently adorned yours. Feeling more and more conscious by the minute and wanting to remain totally open with him, you spoke in a weak voice. 

"Levi." He looked up. "It would've been nice to have more of a choice I guess and I'm still young but right now, I honestly don't want to change a thing." He smiled lightly, clenching his fingers around your right hand tightly, a weight lifted from his shoulders. 

"I can't even start to tell you how much I fucking love you, (F/N)." What, for many couples, would be a devastating blow turned into a moment that served to solidify your relationship, adding to the fact that you were both firmly on the same page at all times.

The surgeon returned shortly after, checking that you were able to understand what had happened, which you did. He made a few checks and informed you that the nurse would be by soon and that you would be kept in overnight due to the amount of blood you'd lost; unfortunately, Levi wouldn't be allowed to stay. Feeling the man by your side stiffen at that revelation, you imagined how they might need to get security in here to physically remove him from where he sat. Once you were alone again, a grumbling drawl came from next to you. 

"I'm not fucking leaving, (F/N)." Smiling lightly, you ran your thumb over the back of his hand to try and calm him, but remained quiet. His voice may have been dark and defiant but it also held an air of reticent acceptance, aware that he knew he would have to go at some point. The room was silent again for a while, only the beeps and ticks of machinery sounding out and you began to feel tired, eyelids dropping, random pictures playing across your mind. Levi watched as you snoozed and he sighed. He'd thought he was going to lose you. Before that could manifest any further, he pushed the depressing idea away and pulled out his phone, sending a message with faintly trembling hands to Hange. Not interested in a response, he turned the device off and sat back to gaze over at you a while longer.

Shuffles and the rustle of paper made Levi's head snap up. At some point, he must have drifted off too, the stress of the past few hours having caught up on his exhausted body. The nurse was ferreting around, noting down readings and arranging some leaflets. Glancing over, he saw that you were awake, smiling face laid against the pillow and staring at him with slight humour. 

"Tch." He sat up straight and smoothed his shirt down, annoyed at himself for showing weakness. Looking up, he saw it was nearly 8pm already and watched as the woman dressed in white made an exaggerated effort to tuck you in, moving to dim the lights, all the time wearing a sour expression. Your voice trickled through with an apologetic tone. 

"I think it's time you got home, Levi." He scowled, thoroughly unimpressed with the prospect of having to leave you alone here in this soulless building, yet he knew you were right.

"Ok (F/N), but I'll be right back first thing in the fucking morning." As he gathered his jacket, the nurse cleared her throat and spoke harshly. 

"Language." Grey eyes rested on the older woman with animosity and in an attempt to avert what would undoubtedly be a battle of wills, you reached out and ran your hand up and down his arm. It took everything he had to break his stare and he leant down to place a few soft kisses on your lips. 

"Love you, (F/N)." Levi stormed out of the room, leaving you with the bitter faced nurse and she sighed and shook her head. 

"What the hell are you doing with him, sweetheart? He needs to learn some respect." Smiling, you looked across to where she fiddled with one of the machines. 

"Don't take any offence. That's just his standard response to most people. He's actually really sweet." She snorted and rolled her eyes. 

"Yea, whatever you say."

~~~~~~

Finally it was 10am and nearly time to leave. You'd only been here one night, but it was such a stifling, stale atmosphere that you just longed to get out into the fresh air. And, in all honesty, you were dying for a cigarette. Levi had arrived at 8 with some clean clothes, but you imagined he'd been in the building a lot longer, waiting to be let in. The nurse had helped you get out of the hospital gown, gave you a hand with a quick wash down and got you dressed, grumbling and tutting the whole time. You eventually realised why she kept glaring at your lover, having totally forgotten that someone would have had to get you into the gown in the first place. Luckily, she didn't mention the fading marks across your skin as you were seriously not in the mood to explain.

Leaflets and painkillers had been handed out and instructions given. The incisions had been small, but the area would still be painful and tender for a while, and you were under strict orders to rest. You'd been ordered to rest for two weeks and in that time you would have to remain relaxed, no strain on your abdomen, which meant no heavy lifting, exercise or sex. Well, what they had actually said was no penetrative sex. It was only two weeks and you knew it would be difficult for you both, but there were ways around it. At the end of the fortnight you would have to return for a check up and scan to make sure everything was healing as it should and after that, it should be fine for you to start getting back to normal.

The air hit you as the automatic doors slid open and Levi led you out with a strong arm around your waist. It was a divine feeling, the breeze on your skin and the fresh scent of threatening rain in the sky and you smiled widely as a lit cigarette was passed across once you had left the hospital grounds. A short cab ride brought you home and it seemed like months since you had been here - the reality was less than twenty four hours and as you walked carefully into the apartment, your eyes took in the scene. The large cushions on the couch had been set up at one end for you to lay against, making sure that you could be as horizontal and comfortable as possible. Two mugs sat in the kitchen, ready to be filled with hot water on your return and the place was spotless; to occupy himself when alone last night, Levi had cleaned from top to bottom whilst making his way slowly through a bottle of wine.

Hands sat you down gently against the soft mountain of pillows and your shoes were pulled from your feet before your legs were lifted up onto the couch. Levi went to place your dirty clothes in the washer and turned on the kettle and TV, news stories flashing quietly across the screen. The throbbing dull pain in your lower torso was bearable, slight stings shooting through you as the skin worked hard to repair the unwelcome cuts that had been made. Coffee was placed on the table next to you and you felt your legs being picked up as Levi sat down closely, placing your limbs back down across his lap. He leant sideways so he was pressed against your arm and stroked your cheek softly. 

"You ok?" Nodding, you smiled over and laced your fingers into his raised hand. 

"I am now we're home. Fucking nurse was doing my head in." His own smile flickered across his lips and he laid his head on your shoulder, happy to have you back where you belonged.

~~~~~~

The two weeks were mind numbingly boring and you were sure you would have gone bat shit crazy if it hadn't been for the visitors. Your closest friends had all been by and the apartment now looked like a florists. Every night without fail, Levi had come home, started cooking dinner and run you a bath. He would help you in and bring a glass of wine through for you to relax with in the gloriously scented bubble filled water. Tiny scars on your abdomen were now fully sealed and the stitches had been the temporary kind, no need to get them removed as they dissolved after their job was done. Pain was rare and the scans at the hospital on the last Friday of what felt like house arrest had confirmed that internally, you were well on the way to recovery. Not willing to risk causing any unwanted pain, you had both abided by the rules, but that hadn't meant that you had to keep your hands off each other. Or mouths.

As you walked to work on Monday morning, an excitement ran through you. Having been given the all clear to continue on as normal, yet mindful of your limitations, you gladly returned to the office. October was nearly upon the city and you wore a light jacket to keep the cool air from chilling you too much. Levi walked by your side and you linked your arm in his, smiling up at the birds that soared high above you. It was peaceful, still relatively quiet out and you felt a renewed energy, a lust for life almost. Before you could enter the building, you were stopped and pulled gently into an embrace, tender kisses placed on your lips. Humming into him, your heart skipped as the simple show of affection made your skin tingle. Pulling back, he smiled down into your eyes and slowly you began to walk into the office together.

Hundreds of emails awaited you and god knows how many expired deadlines that would have to be rearranged - people of course had been informed of your absence, but it was doubtful that anyone would have been able to do any of your work whilst you were away. Also, you were pretty sure you weren't going to get any of it done today as the steady stream of visitors and well wishers was relentless. At one point, there were four people crowded round you at once, all making sure you were ok to be back, asking if you needed anything. Whilst it was lovely to have been missed and fussed over, it did begin to get claustrophobic towards the end of the day. By 3pm, you finally managed to get down to some work, sending emails quickly as your fingers danced over the keyboard. Today was all about catching up and rearranging dates, no actual work would be possible until tomorrow.

Another email popped up from Hange. She'd already been over to see you about eight times today and you laughed as you saw what she'd sent you. 

'So are you guys going to be that couple who get loads of cats instead?'

From anyone else it may have seemed in bad taste, but you knew from experience that she meant no harm and had only intended to cheer you up. It worked.

~~~~~~

Another couple of weeks had passed by, but thankfully not as painfully dull as the previous two. Saturday night was in full flow at your bar and you waved across to your friends before sliding into the booth next to Levi. Two full glasses of wine sat on the table and you gave him a gentle kiss. Both of you knew what day it was, but neither of you had spoken about it until now. It had been one year since the day a pair of grey, flashing eyes had looked across the counter at you. One year since you both realised there was something magnetic about one other. Raising your drinks in tandem, you smiled as he delivered the toast.

"To first name terms."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that is that, the last of my fics to move from my old account. Sorry for the update spam to my subscribers, I just had to take advantage of a quiet day and get this finished! Thanks everyone for reading :)


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